The Hermit Club
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Camille so sorry they had to reschedule. I'm still liking it. I've just been staying up too late reading and watching tv. I finished the book "Gone Girl" in two days. That's just stupid-staying up, not the book.
Teka hope you're feeling better!0 -
Hi fellow hermits:
Struggling through the week with energy up and down. I wonder if it may be from the internal rad last week or all that goes having been away, and then trying to recover as I return? My client has been VERY needy this week too, and that has not helped. Going to bed early tonight, hopefully tomorrow will be better. I know many on this thread struggle with fatigue and sisters, I hear ya on that front this week!
Nikki- welcome to our little world where we cherish our hermitude. I spent a lot of time in a shell last fall after two major health things that struck at the same time. I think we need to have that alone time to adjust to the "new normal" that becomes our daily lives.
Camillegal-sorry to hear you are having GI issues. Get plenty of rest and fluids.
All you other wonderful women, take care of yourselves. Will pop in again this weekend.
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Hi all! Having another busy week with work. But I feel like I'm in a good mental place right now to be able to really focus on it, vs. struggling to do the smallest thing, which I have been dealing with these past weeks. I am so tired, though. However, I'm one week in to my Xeloda (4th cycle - god it seems like I've been taking it forever), and I've felt much better this time around. Can't explain that at all - but there you have it. No horrific gas/bloating this time around. Maybe my body is learning to deal with it better or something. I dunno - I just hope when I schedule my scan in a few weeks that it comes out ok so I can keep taking this and not have to switch to something more harsh.
In other news, my pulmonologist, while no doubt a brilliant physician, (whom I do trust) was holding the door when common sense was being given out. He says to me yesterday, "Well, you just have a little chronic problem." Oh? Is that all? Well, then! Let's break out the champagne! It was just the way he said it. I know he was saying it to be nice, and I get that I'm being a bit catty - but really.
No travel for work on the foreseeable horizon, and I'm so excited about that...especially with the flu spreading like it is. Being on planes with all the hacking and coughing freaks me out under normal circumstances, much less now! People can be so gross! Blech!
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LL I'm glad work is going better and u'r feeling better, of course u have to be tired--work is tiring enough let alone with the other things oing on. I hope u start feeling better and better.
It's kind of empty here lately--more are working.
Teka how are u doing--did u call the Dr.
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Hugs to all for feeling better. Camille--did you ever conquer D? There are all sorts of Google health news pieces now on fecal transplants. I had never heard of it until you said... what a world we live in. Wonder who thought it up.
BS appt today. Dx mammo took forever. Radiologist did not like films, kept trying again and again... squish, squash, splat. ugh. Asked dr about pain--her response, "You want surgery for that?" gee thanks. So, she simply upped my magnesium dose. We'll see what happens. I really do try to stay positive. and my hermity self just wants to stay home. Cats understand. Curl up, sleep, soak up any warmth to be had. Find a sunny spot and an understanding spirit. Sleep some more.
cranky me. Bah humbug. Sooo glad for tomorrow being Friday. Usually the kids are more cheerful, panting for the weekend. It'll be a good day.
Wishing you all improving health. and laughter. and love.
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Hugs ladies--u know I hade D for over 5 yres getting worse and worse with loads of tests, biopsies and all kinds of things and it's always been a puzzle--What I am having I've had before they just do the same tests--but this last year has been the worst, been sicker with pain and for longer periods of time--When I told this new Dr. themeds I take and how much his highbrows went up and he said it doesn't stop--nope. So that's why it's become much more os a problem-- so we'll see what happens with this group of Drs. that's all/
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Hi fellow hermits:
Catching up on your post.
Camillegal- I hope you are feeling better soon. Anything GI related is wicked on top of all the rest. I had a ruptured appendix last year that almost took me out and my GI system has never been quite the same. When it rains, it pours sometimes.
LizLemon- glad you are in a good place and not having to travel. I agree about the flu and other things going around. We must protect our immune systems!
Went to see my breast surgeon today to get checked post procedure for the internal rad last week and all is well there. Made it through that ordeal and without infection. But not as good news is my OncTypeDX test for both breasts in the intermediate range, and now talk of chemo on the table. Due to early stage and grade, clear nodes, chemo has always been off the table until now. Going to be talking to two MOs and see what they advise. My breast surgeon says there is no clear answer on chemo for this range. Just when I thought I might be coming through the other side of this. I now understand the expressing "living with cancer" so much better as I go through this.
The weekend approacheth although there are work things going on for me a bit there too. But I will also embrace some nice quiet time too!
Peace and love to all of you!
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Oh Jazzy sorry to hear about the chemo--but it's true this beast does not go down quietly. Just hang in there and if u have 2 Drs. telling u u need it, then u probabl should--there are lots of bumps on this road and we just let the Drs. do what they do best. Let us know as soon as u know.
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Camillegal-thanks for your note. Got the actual score for the invasive which is 23, DCIS is low reoccurrence (12). I won't get much info for awhile yet, next step is the next internal rad in late Feb and will meet with one med onc there, the other Med Onc in March. No one is rushing me to the doctors on this one (if it were a high risk number, chances are, things would be different). I am going to research things and be well prepared for my apts when I do have them.
How is your D?
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Teka- shoot, I checked that out. What does that mean for you? No wonder he could not look you in the eye. Crapshoot is right!
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Teka I hope u'r feeling better too.
Wow All of u ladies just throw my mouth open--I never read one report, cuz I didn't understand anything anyway, therefore I had no questions, therefore I had no worries, therefore I still don't know what anything means and when we got our blood tests back while chemo was going on I thouht let's play liar blood test and we'd all try to win who had the lowest score-I thought that was good, but I did learn eventully it usually wasn't so I know more about blood panels cuz I'm always getting them. LOL
My D stopped late yesterday, but I know it could start tomorrow I rake so many meds for it-The Drs. can't figure out why I'm not consripated LOL so I know more about SE and after chemo and herceptin cuz it's still going on and I see the Drs. all the time for testin. But I still don't worry--that's what makes me the queen of hermits I don't think about any of this I just go along. I'm so weird.
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Teka-thanks for your insights. You are right about asking the scary questions, and already compiling a list. This news came from the breast surgeon's office who ordered the test, and I realize before I get my panties in a wad that I need to have the MO consults as they will be the ones to help me to understand the scores along with the rest of my pathology, etc. and what my options are. No one is rushing me in to have this conversation either, which might be the case if the scores were higher. I got myself calmed down at bit about this after a few conversations and some research yesterday.
Also found another discussion group here on this site around this particular subject and how women are going about making their decisions. Some good information out there to ponder.
Camillegal-glad your D is better. Enjoy your hermitude! I wish for more of that than I might get this weekend.
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Sorry I have been just lurking mostly. Feeling incredibly whinny and I hate myself for it. So many are dealing with really bad crap right now and it just seems bad to whine about nothing. Not my usual style and so am frustrated with myself right now.
Jazzy - I was also in middle range. Decided against chemo as the benefit percentage of doing chemo did not seem worth the risks (and they are real). Doable if you have to, but same as with making choices about your rads you need to be sure about what is right for YOU. Only thing I thought that was worse than chemo, was doing chemo and not getting much benefit. We all know there are no guarantees ... so you just have to make a choice you can live with. More treatment is not really insurance . Very tough, but you sound like a very smart woman and I am sure will weigh all the info.
Cami - glad to hear off the D train today .... hope it stays that way. Hope you can get your tests and maybe some answers.
Happy weekend to my fellow hermits
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Hi Hermits! I try to read and stay some what caught up...but I am stretched so thin on time now that I am back working full time (with a longer day and longer commute, ugh). The new job is uuhh...well like a roller coaster. One day is good and the next is straight from hell. I never know what to expect when I go in. Very nerve racking and emotionally taxing (exhausting!!!) to deal with the "personality" of the dept manager. She is very nice...but...VERY MICRO-MANAGING and VERY MIRCO-CONTROLLING!!! I HATE that part of it and pretty much told her that on Thursday. She admits to it, owns it, apologizes, and promises it will get better. Friday it was better...but what will Monday bring?
Sorry, I am full of whines today. My best friend has a job interview on the other side of the state Tuesday. I wish her well and I understand her reasoning, but I will really miss her if she gets the job and moves over there.
Those of you who had MX and SNB, do you have uncomfortable 'tightness' in your arm pit area, shoulder, upper arm? I am a year and a half out from sx and the comfort level is not getting better, if anything it is getting worse. I do not have lymphadema that I know of. No swelling or puffiness. Fortunately I do have full use of my arm, it just doesn't feel "right" and is extremely annoying. When my arm is down to my side it feels like there is a wad of something stuck in my arm pit. Anyone else have that sensation? I was having shoulder PAIN for about a month, but thankfully that has resolved!
Enough about me. Sorry for all the whining.
Wishing you all a wonderful weekend!!!
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Skittle, after reading my last post I’m sure you get the “long-quiet”. I meant to watch the globes. I was sad when I realized that I missed them. Ouch! To the radiologist. Squish and squash is no fun! One of the threads I am on (uh oh…can’t remember which one…) they talk about how there should be a “Man-o-gram” and do the squish, squash thing to their thingy…and see if they don’t come up with a better diagnostic test real quick!!! (silly but amusing thought…)
Markat the cake sounds really cute! Bet your daughter was very thrilled! Hope you are getting rested. Glad you are liking your new job!
Jazzy hope you are recovering well and getting rested from both the rads and the trip. Both can be tiring events. This crazy bc journey really is a MAZE with unknown twists and turns and you really never know where it ends! Read and study what you can, write down your questions and take them with you to both MO appointments. Gather the insight from the MO’s and get all of your questions answered (I agree with Teka, even the scary ones…), ponder it all, pray (if you do) and make the decision that is best for YOU!
Liz glad you are getting your energy and focus back. Best wishes for great scan results!!! I lived north of Dallas for MANY years…I grew up in Richardson (with the exception of a couple of years in Austin). Lived in Carrollton and Farmers Branch during high school. I bought a house and raised my son in The Colony. What area are you in?
Camille hope you are doing well today!!!
Teka was that your original path report or one you just recently got? How long ago was it? Crapshoots…just suck!
bgirl just know that you are not alone in the whiney place. I am right there with you! Hope you do enjoy your weekend!
Hope everyone is feeling good and as healthy as possible. There is so much cold and flu going around here. I try and keep my distance from anyone and everyone and wash my hands a lot!
I ventured out of my shell last night went to one of my LEAST favorite places, the mall. I HAD to get some clothes for work. I spent the last 4 years going to work in scrubs, so I have no work wardrobe. Every time I heard someone cough, sneeze or sniffle…I suddenly went the other direction! I was lucky and found a few things all on sale or clearance YEAH! Now I won’t have to do that again for a while!
Happy Weekend Hermits!
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Hi everyone! I rested last night after my crazy 20 hour work week -lol! I'm so freaking out of shape. Before all of this I worked a seasonal job at a golf course and was on my feet running around for 8-9 hours a day. Now I can barely make 4! Each day is getting better and I do my crazy leg lifts while working. My feet hurt so bad when I sit down that it's not even worth it!! Whine over
I'm glad I didn't really have a choice about chemo because I may have said no. I tend to do that when given a choice. Nipples? No thanks. Radiation? No thanks. I'm surprised I had reconstruction lol!
Jazzy, just listen to your docs and do what you feel is best. You're the only one you have to explain things to.
Fl sorry about BFH (boss from Hell). I had one of those once. The stupider I acted the more she left me alone, or just did the jobs herself. She taught me to never be the best at something because then they're over your shoulder nit picking and biatching. I get pain/tightness in my axillary area where they took the nodes. So far no swelling.
Teka hope you're feeling good and having a nice weekend.
Camille hope the D stays away for awhile.
LL, hope you're having a nice restful weekend!
Whaevah our show's back on tonight!!!
Hugs and love to all!0 -
Oops forgot bgirl! You know better than to worry about whining to us! Hope your day is going good!
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Bgirl-thanks for your input on the Onctype. I am inclined not to do chemo unless I hear something compelling that would make me reconsider. I know chemo is do-able, the short and long term SE are to be considered. Like you say, we all have to live with the reocurrence potential so I just need to know what that % is. I have spent some time researching this and will have good questions when the time comes.
And you are entitled to be whiney too- it is hard for us gals going through this. I find myself more intolerant these days.
FLWarrior-boy can I relate on the job stress front. Came home from my out of state treatment to my client site this week and it was SO difficult with lots of firedrills around our big project running late (that suddenly they realize is running late). I think it is hard to go through all this and work, but we need money and to have our insurance too, right? Hopefully by bringing the micromanagement to her awareness, it WILL be better Monday for you. Wishing you a better work week!
Hoping the rest of you are doing okay, feeling okay!
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Oh, Jazzy...I wish I had insurance. I was at a job that I liked and did have insurance, but due to obama-care/medicare cuts...the company eliminated my position at all locations across the state the week of Thanksgiving. I went to work somewhere else...I do not like it and there is no insurance...needless to say I am looking for something else.
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Teka u know u can say anything on here and it might help someone make a decision, unless u really want to ut it out of u'r head that's fine too. 'Markat u sound full of piss and vinigar excet for u'r oor feet--I hope that gets better for u and I don't blame u for being tired u have to get used to a schedule not around Drs. now.
FL I hope u find a better job soon for u'r liking and insurance. U found this one fast, so maybe another one will come along too (((HUGS)))
and Jazzy do exactly what u want to do--something in u'r heart will feel right then do it--we're all here so let us know.
Ok getting bed ime--I've been sleeping on and off all day.
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FL... you and I have shared thoughts. DH once asked what a mammogram was like. I told him to think about stepping up to the open refrigerator, placing testicles gently by the door seal, and closing the door. Then, change angles and repeat. (He "got it," and has been all worried puppy eyes each time I have to go back.) Sad to hear of your stress and insurance woes. Insurance is one of the whys I keep working... We all fight so hard. It's ridiculous that $ has to even be a part of the equation.
Wishing each and all well. Teka, of course I googled the difference in terms you mentioned. I didn't know there was a substantial difference. News to me.
Camille... you are so good at supporting us all. Once that lottery is won, you have to have the nicest room at the spa.
Jazzy... my onco score was 19. MO chose no chemo for me. You will make the right decisions to support what you need to do. and all hermits will back you.
markat, bgirl... hoping for healing and good days.
Eveyone off tomorrow? Anyone know anything about splinting a thumb?
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Oh man Skittle, I sure don't! Do they think it's a break that didn't heal right? Or some kind of arthritis? I'm off tomorrow and I keep forgetting, lol!
Teka, I can understand wanting to move on, but just remember that we all care about you and share this stupid experience together
Camille, thanks! How are you feeling today? What's your sweet grandson been up to lately? My little Katie keeps getting little presents from an 8yo boy in her class. She doesn't "get it". I just giggle and tell her that he's a sweetie.
I'm in full hermit mode today! Parked infront of the tv catching up on my shows. Anyone know anything about filing taxes as an independent contractor? This sounds fun -not!0 -
Hi Fellow Hermits- got out of my weekend shell and had breakfast with a friend today I have not seen in a year. She also works at the client site where I am consulting (and did not share anything with her about the bc), but we had a nice visit and talked about some other similar shared situations with our families. Nice to NOT talk about it sometimes as you know and felt like one of those times of just feeling normal, for a bit.
FL Warrior- I remember you saying you found a new job, but sorry you don't get insurance, especially at a time you really need it most. Since I am self employed, I pay for my own insurance which is like $600 per month and then I have the out of pocket to pay (and in the new year here, we start all over again). I am glad you found another job so you have income and do hope the next best job comes to you soon with some nice benefits.
Teka- we are here to share with you but I understand what you are staying. I feel sometimes I just need to stop with some of the stuff, and go on. Know we are here to listen.
Camillegal- everyone is right about you supporting us all. I hope you have had good rest today and thank you for supporting me with knowing the right decision I will need to make down the line from the onctype results.
Not off tomorrow, I tend to be off with the client site is closed, which they are not tomorrow. I kind of wish I were off though as I could use an extra day to myself and there are cool things going on tomorrow. I do plan to leave early though, which I can do as a freelancer. For those of you on holiday tomorrow, enjoy it. For those of you working like me, make it a good day anyways.
Blessings to you all!
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Thank you for the support and kind words about the job situation. You hermit ladies are the best!!!
Speaking of work...I do have to work tomorrow. Everyone enjoy their day tomorrow!
Skittle too funny about your husband and the fridge door! Good analogy to help him understand.
Thanks Camille ((HUGS)) to you!
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teka... fond thoughts are floating your way.
Jazzy... glad you had a good "normal" breakfast. It's refreshing to get away from it a bit.
markat... the se is a result of disappearance of calcium. Joint pain to the point of not being able to walk is considered normal, but I've been lucky so far. It takes a while to "warm up" from being still a while, but I shouldn't complain. The thumb thing is just bizarre. I never knew how dependent on that silly thumb I am. Putting on shoes, turning door knobs, driving, carrying, writing... on and on. pity party. sorry. There's no break, but a messed up tendon shaft that controls the flexing. I'm going to hunt online for a splint, and see what happens.
Happy Monday. Hugs to each.
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Hey there, iv just joined up and this is my first post besides my own topic so bare with me if I freak it up plz.. I'm 2 yrs diagnosed and can't even go frickin shop sometimes for milk, bitch at my partner for no reason and cry at ugly betty. Where is the normality? Sorry, ur the first iv replied to hope iv not been out of turn. Livestrong xx
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Welcome shambles! You are definitely welcome here-all are! Sorry you are having a hard time. We've all been there in one way or another. I pretty much hid the entire year of my treatment. I'm just now getting out.
Skittle that's crazy. I'm sure there's a YouTube video that can show you exactly how to do it.
Jazzy and FL, hope you have a good day tomorrow or it at least goes quickly. My DH has to work too,he took a personal day Friday to get his long weekend lol!0 -
Skittle is your thumb issue from SEs or is it an injury? I'll join your (pity) party...I have trouble doing the same things you mentioned, but mine is from nueropathy. I have it in my hands and in my feet...good ole taxotere. They sell splints at Walgreen's. Do you have Walgreen's where you live?
Welcome Shambles. Your "name" describes my life at this moment...
Thanks Markat.
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Thankyou so much to the ppl who replied to me. I apologise, I'm not just new to this site, iv a new phone too so I can't scroll back for names etc without losing everyfrickinthing. I'm loving this as its 4am where i am yet u guys are up and awake so thankyou for being here xx
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Can anyone guide me on posting a pic plz? I'm on a blackberry, no pc, and iv a week old pink ribbon tat on my wrist. I'd like to use this as my profile pic. Thanks xx
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