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Starting chemo August 2014

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  • Bippy625
    Bippy625 Member Posts: 602
    edited February 2015

    amy, yes! Now get that pcr and time to move on. Hope you are doing good!

    Jenifer, rads: i am on rad 13 of 25. Do not fear it. i was pissy about it, my skin is pink and a tad tight, nothing horrible. It is, for some reason very emotional for me. Maybe cuz it is the end tx? Anyway, those suffering really bad burn issues are the few vs. the many. Yes, it can happen but hopefully not. If so, know they can rx things. A tip I learned today: use lidocaine cream. I have a whole tube and will use it if my discomfort increases.

    I am sorry for your ducts, but you have a great attitude. Sounds like you will get the best care too.

    Thanks cassie, i am better now. Met a cool chick at rads, she demanded a gown that was not pink! Love her

  • Catie57
    Catie57 Member Posts: 259
    edited February 2015

    Amy - So glad surgery is over! Hope the Benadryl kicks in.

    My nails lifted after Taxotere but never lost them. I also am using tree tea oilsoap which I believe has helped. I keep them short and polished. They were sore but not so much now. Picked it up at Trader Joe's.

  • zjrosenthal
    zjrosenthal Member Posts: 1,541
    edited February 2015

    Anyone else have really dry skin from chemo? I can put on a ton of lotion after shower and 5 min later skin is like a desert. Love, Jean

  • Bippy625
    Bippy625 Member Posts: 602
    edited February 2015

    jean, yes! My face is so different. All over is so dry, never was before. Also, my choch is now dry too, gyno says from chemo. Oh joy. Sorry, Too much info!

    I got some rainbath sesame oil, will try it. Also switched to dove moisture soap. Hope it helps.

  • CassieCat
    CassieCat Member Posts: 863
    edited February 2015

    yes! Dry all over (yep, everywhere), and uncomfortably so sometimes. Chemo, argh.

    Had my CT scan for rads today and it really shook me. The muscles hurt on the MX side, my hand fell asleep, I wasn't very good at deep breathing the first few tries and I felt so damned exposed. My emotions are still much closer to the surface than I care to admit. I came home crying and took an Ativan. DH was home working thankfully and let me get it all out. 7-10 days until my first treatment which they warned will be long, like an hour or more. It's all just another reminder that I'm not done and that this is all pretty damn scary. I try not to think about that too often but it snuck up on me today.

    So grateful for you ladies here. Thank you for being here and sharing and listening.

  • zjrosenthal
    zjrosenthal Member Posts: 1,541
    edited February 2015

    Cassie, so glad you were able to get out the emotional junk. One thing this cancer journey is teaching me is how to let myself be weak. Love, Jean

  • Kellogg2006
    Kellogg2006 Member Posts: 159
    edited February 2015

    Amy glad surgery went well!

    My nails are brittle too. Everytime I think they are getting better, they don't. I have two toenails that aren't looking good either and might fall off. I had my follow up to chemo appointment with my MO. He told me many patients have a real emotional reaction when they finish chemo and that it's normal and will pass. Queue the crying by me. So I will be taking exemestane (aromasin) for the next five years (at least). And I go in for a Lupron shot monthly to surpress my ovaries since I am premenopausal, got my first one today. Looks like I won't be having a period for awhile (yay?). But also may not be able to have another child. I'm 37 my son is 2, we planned on possibly having another this year. Not so much now, maybe in a year or 2 my MO said. I think this is the hardest part for me to swallow it makes me cry everytime I think about it.

  • Bippy625
    Bippy625 Member Posts: 602
    edited February 2015

    cassie, me too. The scan, the tats, the drawings, the exposure. All of it, every bit, is another revelation of the seriousness and deadly nature of our disease. It is freakin scary. This chit requires yet another sacrifice, now it is burning. Poison, slice, burn...repeat as necessary. And the beginning is the worst, very disorienting and surreal. I had a breakdown too. More than once.

    But, it is better now. My techs are wonderful. We have bonded. I trust them. You get used to it. And i was miserable in the beginning, just read my rad posts to see.

    I am doing 14 of 25 to tomorrow, that is nearly 3 weeks! It flies by, believe me. The first week or two is hard, but you will be better once the routine is set. I am a tiny bit pink, not bad, and actually not as tired as first week. Just take it easy and be kind to yourself. We are not yet out of the woods, but the end is near. You can do it!

  • eileenpg
    eileenpg Member Posts: 431
    edited February 2015


    9 more rads for me.  I have taken coconut oil from the jar. It is hard, thick ,white. Rub it in my hands and spread over my body. Helps with dry skin. Also, Palmers coco butter. My skin is not too dry.

    JeniferE=Oh My. Whats up with your eyes? Taxotere is so tough on the body. Hope you get it fixed soon.

     Don't know why I have barely ever cried and never got bitchy or upset. My BF says I am actually nicer now. How could that be? I thought I was always nice.  I think I will probably just have a big melt down one day.Who knows.  I really think we are just lucky in an unlucky sutuation. We all are able to get treatment with good prognosis. That never leaves my mind.

     

     

  • Catie57
    Catie57 Member Posts: 259
    edited February 2015

    Tomorrow is my last radiation treatment YES!

  • ladyb1234
    ladyb1234 Member Posts: 1,239
    edited February 2015

    Amy, so glad that surgery is over for you. And happy to hear from you! It's recovery time so take it easy. Hope the Benadryl has kicked in full force by now.

    With AC my usual dry skin improved and feet were like a baby. With Taxol complete opposite - my skin was so dry I had to get prescription lotion, use aquafor(sp?) and switched to dove moisturizing soap as recommended. Taxol was oh so unpleasant for me -- and it is the chemo that keeps on giving even 3 weeks out. Yes Eileen I use your saying all the time with Taxol...lol. I also slather on coconut oil a few times a week in the evening after a nice Epson salt bath that soothes my aches and pains :-).

    I usually get compliments on how nice and hard my nails are. They are very brittle now and I keep them short and apply a strengthening basecoat.

  • Gatomal
    Gatomal Member Posts: 418
    edited February 2015

    hugs to you Amy. Good job! Another phase completed. Hope your recovery is straightforward and u get stronger everyday.

  • Gatomal
    Gatomal Member Posts: 418
    edited February 2015

    ladyB...you must be so soft and nice smelling with all your moisturizing. Hope your baths help relieve some of the pain. I'm still waiting to take one, one month post CSection, but I think it's probably okay now.

    I'm off my BP meds for postpartum preeclampsia and had my eighth taxol today. Four more to go. The good news is my MO said the tumor is " difficult to discern" from the other breast tissue, as I am still making a bIt of milk when the babies cry. So we are going for the final four weeks of taxol, and then we'll be scheduling surgery for last week March/first week April. I think I'll be really relieved to get that over with. I'm trying not to load up on cookies and sugar that grandma has squirreled away. When I get tired it's so easy to reach for those first. Want to try and lose some more weight so my boobs are more stabilized.

    Catie! Can't beleive your last rads is tomorrow! Congrats! I wonder what you'll feel like after. Do you feel well enough to plan something fun, if not tomorrow than over the weekend?

  • Gatomal
    Gatomal Member Posts: 418
    edited February 2015


    I'm so sorry about the kid thing Kellogg. It sucks. BC takes so much, and people who don't go through the treatments really don't get how many years it is and how deep the changes to our lives are. Especially when we are in our childbearing years. It's not just some chemo and surgery and three months...it's years, with big hormonal changes. My MO said to me that he doesn't know if ovarian suppression is definitely on the table now. It depends on the path report op after surgery and the results we get from chemo. But That was the plan I was expecting from the get-go...to do the suppression shots and AIs too. Maybe even a new drug off-label just approved by the FDA yesterday for advanced CA called Ibrance. They were trying to get me into a trial for it in combo w Femara, but may just use it off label. Insurance may not cover it though. We will see. Either way it's just sad and scary to be facing unknown side effects from being thrown into chemopause and how it affects our life plans. I'm so sorry. Hugs. It's not over yet though! You never know what can happen.

    http://fortune.com/2015/02/04/fda-approves-pfizer-...

  • pangtidor
    pangtidor Member Posts: 121
    edited February 2015

    hi all. It's been horrible for the last few weeks. I guess cancer finally gets my soul. It is a long pause, really a long pause in my life. It feels horrible just to sit back and watch other lives go on. I just need to get busy but I can't. I can't be a laid back person but I have to. Sighh... Cancer sucks...

  • Catie57
    Catie57 Member Posts: 259
    edited February 2015

    Pangtidor - Thinking of you and hoping you find the strength to get thru these last phases. Cancer absolutely does suck! It has changed our lives in so many ways. I know you will find a way to overcome any lows and push thru this. We are here for you.....

  • Gatomal
    Gatomal Member Posts: 418
    edited February 2015

    pangtidor! Haven't read your posts in a while. Yes, this cancer stuff just keeps going on forever. Now that I'm feeling better after the pregnancy, I'm able to get out of bed for a few hours each day and my bigger kids seems so starved for mommy to play with them. It makes me so sad and guilty. Things have been turned upside down in our worlds, but we are fighting to stay here a long time and right the ship so to speak. Let's hope we only have to do this once. Hugs from afar.

    We will get back to our new normal. It takes time I've been told, and I try to do a little more walking, picking up my heavy kids for strength training. I actually went shopping to one store after a doctors appt and felt so strange. Like. A prisoner who had escaped. I hadn't been alone, out in public for months. Either in bed or with someone in case I fainted or couldn't walk ( mainly preg related). It seemed like a big deal. There is a lot of rediscovering ourselves, our old habits, our lives. We are also creating new habits and new lives. Be as kind to yourself as you would to a stranger when in the midst of this. We all have a lot to figure out to make our way back to "just a regular day".

  • Bippy625
    Bippy625 Member Posts: 602
    edited February 2015

    pantigor aka shirley, was wondering where you had been. It is weird, isn't it, this person we are now. The world seems unreal---going anywhere alone seems epic. I feel very strange and disconnected. Everyone else just seems to prance on about their day, never noticing my life is altered. You are not alone. My moods vacilate daily. Today is good, yesterday was ok, day before awful. Staying active really helps, as does Lots of sleep. Rads is not as bad as I thought, but still not fun and very upsetting emotionally.

    I am off to rads now, but thinking of you all and for us all to be well, happy, and safe.


  • CassieCat
    CassieCat Member Posts: 863
    edited February 2015

    Shirley, I'm glad to hear from you. Yes, things seem to be worse as they get better for me too. I hate it.

  • SandyLovesLucy
    SandyLovesLucy Member Posts: 154
    edited February 2015

    Shirley, it is so good to hear from you. It's hard that we have to step back from life to give our bodies rest and time to heal.  But you will get back into the stream soon. Be gentle with yourself and know that you have a lot of sisters here cheering you on.

    Amy, thinking of you and hope your feeling well post-surgery!

  • Catie57
    Catie57 Member Posts: 259
    edited February 2015

    Celebrated with my dear friends and family this evening after last and final radiation treatment today. DONE! I was so elated all day. Knowing that everyone I care for was meeting me tonight and happy to see the end of this journey with me. I know I still have some recovery to do physically and mentally. Just glad it's over for the most part and now I can focus on my DH who is having his own issues. I will start my Arimidex this weekend, hoping no side effects. My DH may need to have heart surgery if not sooner, then later. I am hoping to be strong for him now.

    I will continue to be on boards and follow everyone's journey. It would be difficult for me to stop reading and knowing how you are all making out. Much love and strength to all you wonderful women.

    We are all coming closer to the end together. We are beating this darn Cancer all the way.....

  • Kellogg2006
    Kellogg2006 Member Posts: 159
    edited February 2015

    Gatmol thanks for you response. It makes me feel better to know some people get it.

    Catie congrats on being at the end of your journey!!! Such a great feeling, enjoy!

    Shirley nice to hear from you again! :)

  • eileenpg
    eileenpg Member Posts: 431
    edited February 2015

    Catie57= Congratulations! You did it. Best of luck to your hubby. I hope all goes well for him.

  • ladyb1234
    ladyb1234 Member Posts: 1,239
    edited February 2015

    Amy, thinking of you and hope you are resting.

    Catie57, so happy for you. Congrats on really being DONE! Not just a phase but the whole thing! YaY! You and your DH will be in my prayers. Keep us updated.

    Shirley, so glad to hear from you. I have to say I am with you. Seems the closer I get to the end of treatment the more my soul aches for the previous get up and go I had. I haven't been out by myself since before my ALND surgery in July, I stay in for lunch as I don't trust being by myself for long, I can't drive due to vision issues that have set in during Chemo. As Sandy states I had to step back from life and only do what was absolutely necessary? The hardest was stepping back from Ministry which really is my joy And passion. Now knowing and accepting that after my RADs that I still have some recovery to do physically, mentally and spiritually and that it may take longer than I think to settle into my new normal. I use to say "temporary" but for me It will really be a new normal as Lymphodemia (sp) has set it, every 3 month appts for a year, scans will occur Ibelieve for 5 yrs but I need to verify, 10 years of Hormonal therapy, etc. With this said I am determined to be more happy and content, do the things I love, start and finish Bucket list, don't take anything for granted, live on purpose and intentionally and enjoy life. This journey has changed me for the better even though it is the toughest thing I have had to endure in my life so far and I have had to endure a lot. I do believe there is one harder journey and even then I have heard if you have to go through it you learn to adjust your sails and live life to the fullest. I am writing with sad heart as a co-worker passed and she so encouraged me through this journey and offered so much advice and freely and loving shared her experience.

    Thanks all for making me feel so comfortable to post the above as I needed to let that out .. Crying tears of joy right now. That I can see the finish line. You ladies mean a lot to me.

    - Hugs Angie

  • Beatmon
    Beatmon Member Posts: 617
    edited February 2015

    Ladyb, so sorry for the loss of your friend.

    I had my first chemo-lite yesterday..herceptin and perjeta only. I asked my oncologist when I could expect the fatigue to go away and feel better. His answer was in about 3 months...ugh..then he reminded me I am 62, thank you, and had 7 taxotere........and according to him have done very well. My heart ejection fraction was still in the 70%, so I should be good for a long while hopefully on the H&P.

    Leave on the cruise next Sunday.

  • eileenpg
    eileenpg Member Posts: 431
    edited February 2015

    Beatmom= Bon Voyage. Have wonderful trip and ENJOY.

    Ladyb= Hope you get to your new normal soon and it is better than before. Sorry about your eyes and lymphodema.

  • Bippy625
    Bippy625 Member Posts: 602
    edited February 2015

    beatmon, have a blast on your cruise!!! You are such an inspiration to us all.

    Ladies facing rads: not horrible as I had feared. Did 15 outta 25 today and just pink in my pit area. And only cus it was never exposed to sun like my chest. Ummmm. I may have done some skimpy top sunning back when it would not have sent the natives shrieking in the other direction. Who knew, it would be a blessing so many years later?! Lidocaine + solarelief gel + aloe vera gel = it is all fine.

  • ladyb1234
    ladyb1234 Member Posts: 1,239
    edited February 2015

    You ladies are so awesome. I love the way each of you responds when one of us has to "let it out" or "let it go". I am just getting hit emtionally personally from all sides along with this journey but I will stand strong but let it go when needed.

    Bippy, how are you doing?

    Amy, hope you are at home resting and letting others spoil you. How is your recovery coming? Do you have radiation? Thinking of you.

    Beatmon, Glad you are doing well! My MO also told me to expect fatigue for approx 3 months but some of the SEs I have may take 6 months. He also stated that the lymphedemia is life long but can be controlled. Wow cruise! I say live it up and enjoy! I hope to be behind you soon! First it is Las Vegas for us. We were initially thinking April but have moved it to May. Cruise with friends scheduled for September. One of my priority Bucket list items is a cruise to Alaska.

    Hugs Everyone as always and TGIF!

    -Angie

  • zjrosenthal
    zjrosenthal Member Posts: 1,541
    edited February 2015

    My cuticle is finally healing but now I have shingles so it looks like no surgery on Feb.12. Love, Jean

  • Kellogg2006
    Kellogg2006 Member Posts: 159
    edited February 2015

    oh jean. I'm so sorry! That sounds horrible!