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Everything No One Tells You About Cancer and Your Sex Life



  • cuddyclothes
    cuddyclothes Member Posts: 98

    Thank you!! I found out yesterday at the pharmacy that vagifemme is not covered ($185/mo), but Premarin, which is more dangerous, is!


    I wrote to my ob-gyn, asking her for an authorization. I also bought Replens and started using it today.

  • yoga_girl
    yoga_girl Member Posts: 80

    vaginal atrophy

    vaginal dilators - medical codes for insurance (verify/validate verbally with your insurance)

    kits and sizes


    CPT supplies: 99070

    Procedure Code 57400 or 58999

    HCPCS Code: E1399


    The kit reference below is for those who have not been able to be active and/or the area has shrunk to pediatric size opening. More common than you realize.



    Vaginal-Pediatric Dilator Set, set of 4


    75.0mm L x 13.5mm OD x 18.0mm OD


    65.0mm L x 12.0mm OD x 16.0mm OD


    60.0mm L x 10.5mm OD x 14.0mm OD


    50.0mm L x 9.5mm OD x 13.0mm OD



    Vaginal-Rectal Dilator Set, set of 4


    95.0mm L x 26.0mm OD x 33.0mm OD


    86.0mm L x 22.5mm OD x 28.0mm OD


    78.0mm L x 19.5mm OD x 23.0mm OD


    75.0mm L x 12.5mm OD x 17.0mm OD



    Vaginal-Hymenal Dilator Set, set of 4


    150.0mm L x 30.0mm OD x 38.0mm OD


    138.0mm L x 25.5mm OD x 32.0mm OD


    128.0mm L x 22.5mm OD x 28.0mm OD


    120.0mm L x 19.5mm OD x 24.0mm OD

  • kareenie
    kareenie Member Posts: 97

    This sounds similar to the Mona Lisa Touch, except the Monalisa touch is marketed for vaginal atrophy, which is what most of us have due to lack of estrogen. Sounds like the Femi Lift you linked is marketed to tighten a lax vagina due to stretching from childbirth, etc.

    If interested in the Monalisa Touch there is a thread below on this forum.

  • corky60
    corky60 Member Posts: 453

    I haven't posted in a few weeks. My PCP prescribed Vagifem for me even though the oncologist is against it. I tried Vagifem for a month and it didn't make one bit of difference so I see no reason to continue. In addition, I developed not one but two infections while on it: yeast infection and bacterial vaginosis. Both at the same time. I'm in my 60's and this is a first. A very painful first. So unfortunately Vagifem isn't for me.

    I had such high hopes, too.


  • amygil81
    amygil81 Member Posts: 42

    Corky, I've had good luck with coconut oil. Have you ever tried that?

  • corky60
    corky60 Member Posts: 453

    Until I get this recurrent BV cured I don't want to try anything new. I just want this pain to go away.

  • macb04
    macb04 Member Posts: 756

    Hi Corky,

    Sorry to hear about that recurrent BV, owww. Several years ago I got a really severe case of yeast vaginitis after being on antibiotics for Strep and then a few weeks later taking a long flight. I treated the yeast infection, but developed this awful , painful vaginitis. I saw the GYN who gave me a steroid cream. That made it much, much worse. It felt like my groin was on fire. So I went to my Naturopath at Bastry Natural Medicine Clinic on Stone Way in Seattle. I can't exactly remember the brand name, but have used this brand for other things and found it really good. I remember the one I used had Cocoa Butter and smelled like Chocolate. Stopped my symptoms almost completely after one night, something that had been torturing me for weeks. They sell the suppositories at Bastry in their store, in the refrigerator section.

    Hope this helps.

    Home > Health Topics > Women's Health > Vaginal Support > Vaginal Support SuppositoriesHealing Suppositories (formerly Vitamin A) by Wise Women Herbals

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  • luckylegs64
    luckylegs64 Member Posts: 7


    I recently heard about Thermiva, which is supposed to be superior and more successful that Mona Lisa. It uses radio frequency heat vs laser and there is zero down time. I can't seem to find ANY negatives online about it. An MD from Loma Linda invented it...the testimonials are almost giddy and miraculous...I'm considering...just thought I would throw it out there. Hang in there!

  • trvler
    trvler Member Posts: 931

    Keep us posted, Luckylegs!

  • corky60
    corky60 Member Posts: 453

    Thanks macb04. I live about 40 miles from there but if conventional medicine doesn't work I will check it out. My ins doesn't cover it but I see they have special rates for cash.

  • luckylegs64
    luckylegs64 Member Posts: 7


    I just had the first of 3 treatments Thermiva. It is nothing short of a miracle. I have tried many different things listed on these boards to no avail. I was even considering estrogen creams...desperation! Thermiva is a small wand inserted into the vagina and the walls and labia are treated with radio frequency heat. No bleeding, only slightly uncomfortable and it takes about 30 minutes. You are free to do all actives immediately following! There is a stimulation of collagen production that helps lubricate and tighten this area. The cost to me was around $2000 for 3 treatments which was the down side. It is not currently covered by insurance. To me, it's worth it!

  • yoga_girl
    yoga_girl Member Posts: 80


    Thanks so much for sharing. Keep us posted on your 3/6/9 month progress as collagen production continues to progress. Good to know there is more than one option.

    Mona Lisa -

    Thermi -

  • cuddyclothes
    cuddyclothes Member Posts: 98

    My husband and I haven't had penetrative sex for months. We have a full-sized dildo. Once I used it despite the pain, and afterwards I was sore and a little bloody! From this board I learned about vaginal moisturizer and vaginal dilators. I bought Replens, and we went to a sex store. I decided I only needed a small dildo, made of silicone. Smeared with Crisco, it went right in! I also use Premarin on a very occasional basis. I'm going to keep using the Replens and the dildo and hope that stretches and repairs me enough. We're both going a little crazy.

    Unfortunately my husband is VERY inhibited. For a very long time we only did mutual masturbation. He has never liked oral sex. The only two ways he can climax are inside me or with his own hand. Sometimes I feel very discouraged.

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499

    Helpful reference. Thanks

  • yoga_girl
    yoga_girl Member Posts: 80

    What stuff is okay to use down there

    by Carrie Funkhauser MD

    We live in a world filled with "stuff". Practically every day you hear of a new product that will change your life by providing you with X,Y,Z........It can be hard to separate out what stuff you "need" from what you "want", and what you're better off without.

    To read the full article, select the following link:

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499

    Hi y'all,

    I am a newbie on this thread, so I apologize, in advance, for starting waaaay back.

    I was diagnosed in October and had surgery in December. Chemo took place from January through April and I am about to start radiation.

    I began Tamoxifen 2 weeks ago.

    After months of no sex, we are trying again, but I am having a lot of pain during intercourse. It's definitely located in the walls of my vagina. What is this from? Everything is nicely lubed so it's not that....

    Any ideas??

  • trvler
    trvler Member Posts: 931

    It is cause by atrophe of your vaginal walls which happens in menopause/chemopause to some women. You need to start using dilators. REad through the thread.

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499


    I have been reading through the thread and I did think it was atrophy.

    The thing I do not understand is, what happened so quickly? I had already reached menopause before the BC diagnosis, and sex was not painful. It was fine in December, but by May I am in agony? That's weird.

  • cuddyclothes
    cuddyclothes Member Posts: 98

    It's a lot of factors. For me, "sandpaper sex" happened almost overnight.


  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499

    Bam. Sandpaper sex. Perfect. I was wondering what to call it

  • Simplicity
    Simplicity Member Posts: 723

    New to the thread, reading through. Bleh. As much as I loved sex before treatment, I am SO scared to try once I heal up. Ugh. I am going to guess I'll need dilators and lube as I was er/pr+ and vaginal wall pain happened a couple times prior to DIEP/TRAM :(

    This sucks.

  • trvler
    trvler Member Posts: 931

    Have you tried Astroglide? My husband I and I used it and it worked out ok.

  • Jujube2
    Jujube2 Member Posts: 6

    I just completed three Mona Lisa laser treatments and am feeling more normal ! It has rejuvenated the tissue and sex is enjoyable again!!

    I had extreme dryness and stinging pain during sex following prophylactic hysterectomy.

    I highly recommend investigating thus treatment as an option!

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499


    Is Mona Lisa covered by insurance? Does it "solve" the problem or is it something you have to continue with??

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499

    OK, cancer. I am REALLY pissed at you now. I just can't handle this.

  • Simplicity
    Simplicity Member Posts: 723

    I'm with you GardenGypsy. I was really enjoying sex. Not sure how it will be yet. Just had my DIEP/TRAM recon. Dreading trying that first time with my bf. Afraid it wont work..I need orgasms! Sweet sweet release lol Not like were stressed or anything

  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 499

    I made an appointment with gyn. I will report out when I get an official diagnosis and a treatment plan.

  • cuddyclothes
    cuddyclothes Member Posts: 98

    Keep us posted!!

  • flbuckeye93
    flbuckeye93 Member Posts: 27

    I atrophied overnight too. It was crazy. Sex hurt bad and I cried the first time we tried it once chemo was done.

    I tried Replens and it didn't work. My onco reluctantly let me use Estrace cream to get things back to normal. I am interested in Mona Lisa or the other one so I don't have to use this cream.

    As for lube, I was advised to stay away from ones that contain parabens and glycerin both of which can lead to yeast infections. I've used Isabel Fay silicone, but hubby likes the water based ones better. Astroglide has a natural one without those two ingredients, but I haven't used it yet.

    Thanks for the websites. I hope they have a list of where it's available in the US.