CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.

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  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015
    image
  • sewingnut
    sewingnut Member Posts: 475
    edited July 2015

    Slow Deep Breaths, I'm on the front end of the 6 months. I will be seeing the lovely mammo tech in December. December 5 yrs ago I was diagnosed and the train left the station to CrazyTown! and yes, I sew....a lot.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    I can certainly understand you boarding that train. It's torture having to wait another six months. Come December we will be sending all our good thoughts your way.

    My CT scan has been moved to Saturday. My CBC was normal. No answer to why I'm so sleepy all the time.

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited July 2015

    Alice is right. Nice post Slow.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    How are your boys doing Poppy??

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    O man! I am home! Thanks for a new home, SlowDeep! TWO PAGES !!! Sorry, my mom called, then i finished making dinner, then I thought about the lump on the back of my head, then I cleaned up (a little) after dinner, then I thought about my aches and pains, then I watched a little home demolition on HGTV. Then I realized I didn't finish texting you, uh oh... And so, I came here to look: 2 pages! Nothing like home!

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited July 2015

    Two of my boys are doing fine. I have a different mix of their friends in my house all of the time. The kids are allowed to spend the night almost any time as long as their parents say it's okay. Jake, a friend of my 16 year old, doesn't have any family around and is an emancipated minor. He is welcome here any time, day or night. He's a great kid. My DH was giving him dating advice during dinner tonight. I don't mind that someone is always visiting because this last year I missed having my kids friends over.

    My other son is pretty much the same. He is eating better and his emotions seem less extreme. He did go hang out with his friends last weekend, which was great. We have a family vacation planned. He doesn't want to do anything, but said he would go with us.

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    Poppy, that's great! He sounds like he's doing much better! Its a hard stage, for sure.


  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited July 2015

    well, I like what I'm reading here and can totally identify. I'm not in Crazy Town tonight but I'm just driving around the city limits. I was saying to my husband today that 25 yrs ago there were no bc sites, no Lord Google to scare us, I like knowing as much as I can but sometimes ignorance is bliss. There are some boards here that scare the shit out of me, I'm usually up really late but I have to be careful not to scare myself before bed, which is why this seems like a good spac

  • Lucy55
    Lucy55 Member Posts: 2,703
    edited July 2015

    Poppy... Your Hubby sounds like a gem.. giving dating advice ! :-)

    Slow.. Thinking of you for Saturday !! I will be so happy for you when you your great results :-)

    Suladog.. I know what your mean about the bleak picture Dr Google always portrays.. and yes.. there are threads on this board that frighten me too.. I mostly stick to the feel good threads to make me feel better... Since being diagnosed I tend to baby myself.!!

    Tomboy.. Sounds like you've been very busy.. and yes this thread is wonderful.!! You know , I often write a text, and two days latter realize I didn't click on send.! Duh.!! Then I wonder why the other person didn't wrote back.!!

    HI to everyone.!!






  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    Lucy, yeah! I just now sent her the one I wrote last night but didn't send!

    OK. Here's the one story. It was during the after surgery part, and I am not sure, I think I must have been bald headed by then, yeah, I think so. But anyway, I was looking in my mouth for some reason, probably because it felt all furry. And you know in the back of your throat it looks like a series of arches? Well, it wasn't there before, at least as far as I could see, but it really took some twisting of my torso and my neck, while pulling the side of my mouth open with my finger, but I saw this beige-ish lumpy bump about the size of the pencil eraser, you know, the ones on the end of the pencil, and so, a wave of fear swept over me. So, I tried to take my other finger from my other hand, to touch it, like that would tell me anything. So, All of this was happening while I was at my treatment center, but I knew that if i told them, they would biopsy it. So I really ended up standing in front of the mirror, with fingers from both hands bristling out of my mouth, while waiting to see bs. I was going o no. Because one of my mom's friends had cancer of the mouth and it wasn't pretty. I was imaging treatment for that. and pretty much told myself it was all over...

    So, when I went in to see the BS, I saw her PA first, and i told her what i had seen. she wanted to see, and there was another woman with her. First , they said they couldn't see it, but then I told them how hard it was to spot, because of those fleshy arches. Well, finally they did spot it, and they showed the bS. I was getting pretty worried by this time. They asked if I had rinsed, but I hadn't. They said they think they saw it move. OH GREAT!! What the hell IS it!! Bs rushed in, verdict: a piece of food lodged there...crackers, I HAD eaten crackers. saltines, that suck what little moisture you may have in your mouth, right out. Turning into a gluey crumb, well able to stick to that part of your throat.

    But the funny thing also was, i didn't quite believe them, because Bs had biopsied a lump in my neck on that side a few weeks earlier. I was convinced this was all related. I lived with this fear for another while, because i DID try to rinse it out of there, and it wouldn't budge. For days. I was pretty sure my bs wanted me to just go ahead and die n those days, but, eventually that thing did go away.

    All of this is written down in my medical record.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    Good morning fellow crazies!! Hope everyone is having a pain free day so far.

    Tomboy, it is good to have a new home!! I do miss the old one, but it was time to move forward. The great thing about texting is we can do it when we are able. There is never any pressure.

    I loved your Crazy Town story!!! hahahahahaha....That is so funny. I wonder if we will always be like this with every little thing that pops up?? I know when I recovered from flesh eating bacteria, it took me such a long time to realize every cut and sore wasn't going to turn into it again. I was such a basket case for such a long time. My poor DH. I didn't have a place like this to let it all out, so he got the brunt of it all.

    Poppy, you are a wonderful mom!! You love those boys so much, and I know you would do anything for them. I love how all the boys hang out at your house. I'm glad your son is doing a bit better. Getting him to go on vacation sounds like good progress!!

    I really do miss those days. My kids friends are now starting to have families of their own. I love when they visit our house with their babies. Although, it does make me feel pretty old. haha

    Suladog, Welcome to this thread!! I'm so glad you found us. I hope you do feel safe here. We will try our best to keep you out of Crazy Town. I lurk on many different threads. I can't really explain the phenomenon of knowing someone through their posts, but I'm sure many of you can relate to it. There are many I've come to love even though I've never interacted with them.

    Lucy, thank you for the encouragement!! I currently look like someone with mumps, so I'll be very glad when they figure out why. I do that same thing with texts!! I'll write it and forget to send it. Same thing with emails. hahaha As you already know, I'll even post to the wrong thread, and I'm sure I leave people scratching their heads wondering what the heck I'm talking about.

  • rleepac
    rleepac Member Posts: 193
    edited July 2015

    I have an upcoming ticket to crazy town. I am 1 week PFC and I have several appointments on Aug 6 & 7 for repeat Chest CT, Mammogram (even though I think it's useless since it missed my cancer the first time), and breast MRI prior to surgery on Aug 18. DH is excited because he thinks everything is going to be clear and rosy - but it just makes me nervous. This is a scary place between chemo and surgery - not knowing if/how much chemo made a difference. I know that it probably knocked it out completely but there is this little tiny piece of me that isn't convinced. Then I have decisions to make about Tamoxifen vs BSO and AI or OS and AI. Being highly ER/PR positive, I know I need the hormonal blocking but I don't WANT hormonal blocking. I have found that I like my old friend estrogen and I want it back :(

    Crazy town to do list:

    1) stock up on Ativan

    2) don't listen to my inner antagonist

    3) try to be positive

    Bekah

  • m0mmyof3
    m0mmyof3 Member Posts: 9,753
    edited July 2015

    Also circling the city limits of Crazy town. Waiting on word of when the insurance has approved my upcoming CT Scan. I'm due for it next month as I have to see the MO in Sept. to plan on the next course of action depending on what the results show.

    I do have one Crazy town story from when I was going through chemo. It was about the third of six treatments and I was waiting for the bus to take me to treatment and it was the first time my hubby couldn't drop me off because he had to work a half day. His boss had asked him to take the afternoons off the days I had chemo. I knew that we had rain coming that morning, but I figured that I was going to beat the rain and get to the cancer center before it rained as I had forgotten my umbrella at home. Can we say WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So there I am standing there waiting for the bus when along comes a boom of thunder and the rain comes pouring down. The bus showed up after I had gotten pretty much soaked! At least I dried out a bit before I got to the cancer center, but when the nurses there saw me, they knew I had gotten caught in the rain and got me warmed up as they were doing my bloodwork. So needless to say, everytime I need to go to the cancer center and I know we may get rain, I remember to take my umbrella.

  • kathy7
    kathy7 Member Posts: 211
    edited July 2015

    Slow Deep - so every time I type your screen name all I can thing about is the porn star.........

    what was her name ? Deep Throat? Or was that the Nixon burglar? I digress, So pardon, me but I have a visual that you wear a lot of chiffon and have really long finger nails.


    Anyhow, I made the journey here.

    Questions Slow - this sounds extremely stupid. What is a blog? Is it just posts by one person on one subject and where is it accessed? and who else sees it?

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    rleepac, Welcome to this thread!! YAY, another CA girl!!

    Oh boy can I relate. I think I'm married to the most positive man in the world. Plus I don't think they ever want to think there will ever be any other outcome. I guess I would probably be the same in their shoes. Don't you just hate all of those decisions??? It is mind boggling. I love the list!! Ativan and I got well acquainted while going through treatment. Isn't it amazing how many drugs we take? Then we have to take more drugs to counteract the SE's of the other drugs. I wrote your dates down so we can all send our collective positive thoughts your way when the time comes.

    M0mmy, So glad you made it here!! Let us know the date when you can, so we can all be in your pocket. Great story....I will now associate your treatment now with rain. hahaha I bet you'll never forget an umbrella again! We don't get much rain here in So Cal. Pretty soon though we may start needing umbrellas and gas masks for the dust.

    hahahahahahahahaha Kathy!! Now I'm forever going to be thinking of that whenever someone leaves off the last word of my name. If you could see me in my ratty pj's and wild uncombed hair, that notion would go right out of your head. LOL Actually friends and family call me Beppy and I had no idea it was a tampon. I came across it one day in an online advertisement. I'm glad you made it here!!

    Anyone can do a blog online. I originally started it for family and friends to keep them updated on my progress. This way I didn't have to keep repeating my status over and over. Then I decided to make it public for anyone else going through the same thing as me. I often forget when I've had certain tests or what SE's I had during chemo, so it's a good timeline to refer back to. Plus it helped get out all the crazy feelings I was having about this whole process. Most of the things I write never make it to a blog post, but it's still good for me to write it down and get it out. If you're interested in starting one, just send me a PM and I will help you.
  • m0mmyof3
    m0mmyof3 Member Posts: 9,753
    edited July 2015

    I will keep you gals informed.

  • rleepac
    rleepac Member Posts: 193
    edited July 2015

    The good thing is that I will have all results by the end of the second day of testing so I won't have to wait. I might have to wait for the Tumor Board to meet a few days later to see if rads is in my future but I can handle that as long as I know all the test results.

  • Beatmon
    Beatmon Member Posts: 617
    edited July 2015


    Slow deep breathes: I had almost the exact same happen to me....just with a Milk Dud! Cracking me up.

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited July 2015

    Just lurking and enjoying reading the posts.

    I've found that my brain doesn't work very well after all of these treatments and with all of the meds I now have to take. Often people treat me like I'm nuts or stupid. The dishwasher repair guy who showed up to put in the parts ordered by the first repair guy. He asks me what the first repair guy did and what he said about the dishwasher. HOW SHOULD I KNOW? I can't remember anything any more. Today when I went to my appt with my orthopedist, I had to text my DH at work to find out what I wanted to let the doc know about an insurance issue. May be it's from living in Crazy Town too long.

    BTW, I have injured the cartilage behind my knee cap. Physical therapy, knee brace, and more meds. Hope this solves my problem.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    rleepac, I'm glad you don't have to wait long for your results. If rads turns out to be in your future, you will get through. The thought of rads was far worse in my mind than it turned out to be.

    Beatmom, you give me hope for my sanity!! Welcome to this thread. I hope you stick around!!

    Poppy, you're not alone in this. I often feel like my brain has been fried and I have to write everything down or I forget it. Sorry to hear about your knee!! I remember you weren't doing to well when we had our get together. Injured cartliage sounds painful. Hope PT and pain meds help!!

  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited July 2015

    lucy,

    Yes me too! I forgot to add this thread to my favorites.... Doh!

    Anyway waaaay back when , 25 yrs ago they told me I had a poor prognosis.. I was Triple Negative back then. I like to know what's going on so I'm not an ostrich and back in '90 my MO steered me very carefully toward encouraging things. It was hard being a young cancer patient back then, and he also knew I'd probably freak out if people around me started dropping like flies, so he got me into a group with other young patients, I was the only breast cancer one, the others had different cancers and then a few of them started to pop off so I got out of that group and into an actual be support group when I was "the baby" but at least everyone was doing good. And they're all still around even the oldest one who's pushing 90 now! She even was in the group because she had a recurrence on her MX scar and was telling everybody she was going to die....she was too mean to die, and so she's still out there and actually that makes me feel good

  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited July 2015

    Tomboy,

    I once rushed over to my MO at Cedars Sinai because if a big lump behind my ear which I was convinced was brain mets... Turned out my hair band was too tight and causing a dent in my scalp. Boy did I feel like a moron!, then there was the time I got an MRI on my neck because I thought there was a problem, which turned out to be just in my tiny little mind.

    Having a 25 yr respite between diagnoses allowed me to move out of CrazyTown for quite a few years but I never sold my Summer house there.

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    LOL !! I am pretty much driving leisurely through the outskirts of crazytown most of the time lately. I do have a bump on my left scalp behind my ear, and it feels like there is a starfish pulling on my scalp there. It just feels weird. I told my onc about it last time, he told me to stop wearing earrings. i didn't tell him I only wore earrings for appointments, so I can look like I have my stuff together a little. so, when I told my PCP later that month when I saw him, he said it was an inflamed occipital nerve. Now, I just saw him again a couple of days ago, and told him about it again, with some headaches (hoping they are because of humidity) , he told me I need to tell TX place that I need to see a neurologist. Ok! Maybe later.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    Good afternoon ladies. Hope everyone is having a peaceful, pain free day.

    "never sold my Summer house" - hahahahaha Suladog!!

    I've got a funny story to tell about my MO, but I'll save it for later. Just popping in to say hi.

    image

    Hugs to all!! Lurkers too!! :)

  • tangandchris
    tangandchris Member Posts: 934
    edited July 2015

    I just remembered something from about a month ago. Crazy-townish

    I kept feeling this sore spot on the side of my tongue, every time my tongue would brush against my teeth it hurt. So, after a couple of days I decided to google this and somehow realized that I could possibly have oral cancer. I was in the mirror with my mouth as wide as I could get it to see if I could figure out if there was an actual bump on the side of my tongue or not. It was toward the back and on the side so I was having to contort my head to even get a glance. DH came in the bathroom and looked at me and just shook his head.

    I spent the next hour looking up oral cancer signs, symptoms, treatment, survival. YES, it was so fun.

    The next morning I woke up and tongue was fine...haven't had soreness since then.

    *sigh*

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited July 2015

    Oh Tang, you must add one piece of equipment to all those contortions!!.... a FLASHLIGHT!! Been there and done that one too!! I was convinced I had tongue cancer. My DH just shakes his head when the flashlight comes out. I'm ashamed to confess I carry one in my purse.

    What would we do without humor? I think we just might all go mad!!

  • m0mmyof3
    m0mmyof3 Member Posts: 9,753
    edited July 2015

    Probably would!

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    I am watching another woman die from this, and it is fucked up

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited July 2015

    I cannot keep the tears from coming