CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.
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InHim: and I add a spray of glorious fireworks to your drumroll.
Back to my (computer) networking homework--harder than I expected it to be, but then i last did this 22 years ago. Back in the dark ages, when a 40MB hard drive was hot shit. My MP3 players (plural each have 16GB memory. Sheesh. And it's all college-age guys, who seem slightly nonplussed, though gracious, at a (clears throat)-old lady in their midst.
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Wonderful news Inhim! QMC that's the class I need to take. If only I can find a chunk of time.
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yay for good news!
I know what you mean about trying to find a chunk of time, Molly. I can't even seem to find time to catch up on the thread. I think of you all often, though. xoxox
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BTW...I am at a renowned cancer treatment philadelphia...Thomas Jefferson Universith Hospital. Some of the best docs in the world
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Popping in to say "Hi!" and cheer good results and send ((((hugs)))) to those who need them.
During my "too busy to check in" past few days, I got lucky over something that's been worrying me for months. A hard lump on my left big toe, mostly under the nail (until that had to be removed a few weeks ago), just keeps slowly growing and now has another lump beside it. I kept asking for evaluation but kept getting the brush off from various docs, also husband kept insisting I was crazy, until he finally agreed to look at it, too. Well ---- I finally managed to get a call with the same hospital dermatologist I was sent to in spring for a chemo-induced rash. She took me seriously, and after consulting with her senior doc over my cellphone pics, said she'll arrange an appointment for as soon as I get home from next week's trip to Chicago (no way I was going to cancel my mini-vacation with friends I haven't seen in ages). I'm still not "out of the woods", the toe lumps still could be "something bad", but I feel so very much relief that someone is finally taking me seriously, I could cry. One of the most difficult aspects of bc for me has been having the bad luck to get so many SEs and almost always getting met with "you're complaining AGAIN?". Last dose of herceptin is in a week and a half; hoping after that and having my poor toe fixed, maybe life can start feeling a but more normal again, at least for awhile???? Please???
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shorfi sounds like you are in excellent hands there. Hoping your docs there can heal you and fast
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Tessu: "modified rapture" (to quote The Mikado) that your doctor's taking you seriously. We on CT may joke about elbow/sciatica cancer, but the underlying fear's very real. And very common. That said, a lump that's been growing for months? Sheesh. I'd have believed you from the get-go.
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absolutely crazy when we are nervous about wierd side effects but so reassuring when you are taken seriously
Just got call from an independent living place, I gave them a deposit to hold a place as i was not ready to move
We'll I got nervous that this ms thing would mean they would nott ta lingske me, she said I would still be accepted, seems some folks just use a scooter........feeling better on that. They will come out to help me figure out what to take and what to,trash
Should get call from doc today and will know then their thoughts on what treatment
Calmer now or at least for a bit
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So Happy for you InHim!! You will have many days in Crazy Town. But good days too! Hope you stick around to give us positive feedback and count us as new friends!
I got one of my best Hummingbird pictures yesterday - Have to share with you!
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Shorfi, glad you are in good hands. Many prayers and good wishes coming your way. Tessu, woot woot to getting someone to take you seriously. Sheesh! Hugs all around. I hope Lucy is recovering well. iris, good news that they will still take you in the place you reserved. What a relief. Gma, great photo!
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Beautiful photo Gma...love thos hummingbirds.
Good news and in good hands Shorfi!
Tessu- thank heavens someone listened. That is one of the more frustrating aspects of BC.
Hello and hugs to all my crazies. I fell in that rabbit hole again. Stupid medication merry-go-round. Found out my recurrence percentages today. 23-24% with all treatments including hormonal treatment. Off hormonal treatment...46-48%
Pardon me if you happen to walk by me in CT and hear some sailorific language. It should put some color on the cheeks of all who pass. Did I mention cancer f*cking bites?
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so call from Columbia doc, they not do think it is ms......yeah I guess
But they feel I need surgery for the hydrocephelus so they will find a nuerosurgeon who will do the surgery
The dang jersey guy said hE could not do it
So onward
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Darn Iris... Take care! I will stay in your pocket for awhile.
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Iris, hope the hydrocephalus surgery results in some dramatic improvements and that the process of streamlining your possessions and moving goes smoothly.
Shorfi, glad you are in great hands—in your pocket for what comes next and getting through it quickly and easily, that you emerge from treatment into recovery.
Tessu, welcome to my city! Wish you could catch the Cubs, but nobody I know can afford a ticket. Hope things warm up here for you (although, living in Finland, this chilly weather doesn’t feel abnormal to you). Glad to hear you’re being taken seriously. My husband, who is both a cardiologist and PCP, says hypochondriacs make the best heart and cancer patients because they’re grateful to finally be taken seriously. What does your podiatrist say about those toe lumps? Bone spurs? Warts? (they can be quite hard and grow, and since they’re viral, spawn new adjacent ones).
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Wow that is an amazing hummingbird shot! The brown feathers look so luxurious!
For folks following my boundary dispute, a little humor from Mother Nature. The stairs in question were destroyed in the last storm. They will be moving the stairs when they rebuild them. Hahahahaha. The end.
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Kinda like that bumper sticker: My Karma Just Ran Over Your Dogma.
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eggroll - the report on the stair story really made me laugh; thanks for that.
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Oh my goodness I love karma stories!
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eggroll, awesome! Best laugh of the day!
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eggroll- they got what they deserved in my opinion! Mama Nature took care of it for you!
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Philadelphis has some of the best Cancer centers in the country........Jefferson Hospitl is. one of them so Shorfi is in good hands...............
There is also the Fox Chase Cancer center.......Cancer Centers of America, University of Penna....and right across the bridge in NJ we have MB Anderson Cancer Center ......we are very fortunate ...........
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love the storey about the end of the boundary dispute, they say God takes care of us so glad he has taken care of your pesky issue
We'll it is cold and dang wet but headed to the gym and even got onto the treadmill fot 5 minutes, when I was starting to get off, a lovely pal showed up and really just stood and sort of protected me while I got off the stupid thing
Success and feeling not bad right now
Hoping Cornell doc calls me Monday with a name, cross fingers
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Iris, fingers crossed! I hope the surgery goes well and that you get clarity and relief! In your pocket. and of course, still in yours, Shorfi. Glad you are in the best hands.
I have fallen into CrazyTown the last few days.....so Monday I have MO's apt and everything seems fine, which I cheerfully reported to MO, MO tells me he thinks I am doing great...so....I was hoping maybe he'd suggest I don't have to come in for a longer stretch. But no, he wants to see me in two months. I know that should make me feel taken care of, but instead it just makes me anxious...and then: all of a sudden the day after MO visit I start getting weird aches and pains! Trigger thumb is starting to show up again after almost disappearing following my switch from Arimidex to Femara....then arm and shoulder start hurting....then my knees, which have been stiff, start getting even more stiffer and hurting....then my back starts hurting....and then, I came home from work Friday and I was so exhausted I fell asleep at seven pm on the couch.
Only two things have changed. First, the weather is changing, which could account for some of the aches and pains given that I do have arthritis...but second, after three weeks out of the office and on vacation or working remotely last week was my first week in a long while really sitting at my desk and having to work hard for fifty or so hours in a week. Sitting isn't good for me. Maybe I just really do need to retire. But my mind goes to crazier places...
MO is encouraging me to talk with UCSF about a knee replacement, and I know I should do so. But the thought of more surgery..yuck. MO also nagged me about getting a colonoscopy, which I have been putting off. also yuck. My anxiety just goes up thinking about either.
I know I have little to complain about compared to those who really are suffering and don't have answers, or have the answers they don't want...but that doesn't stop me. I am tired of being sick, tired of hurting, tired of doctors (don't like docs even in the best of times) and tired of it getting more and more difficult to walk. Tired of being asking me if I am ok when I limp, and tired of people holding doors for me and looking concerned. Tired of feeling unbalanced on anything but a flat sidewalk.
Thank you all for letting me whine.
xoxox
Octogirl
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Oh Octo---gentle hugs sweetie. I know which hole you fell into...so sorry. We all apologize for our feelings because we all know there is someone with a bigger hole on their boat. It doesn't mean your smaller hole is any less of a threat to the quality of life vessel. I understand not wanting to complain because "hey...you're still alive...you made it through...you should be grateful" <---that mentality sucks IMO....chronic pain is debilitating and to understand that each day you pop that med you are causing yourself that pain...it is mind boggling. If I misread your intent I am sorry...still sending along those gentle hugs.
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no, Robin, you are right...it all sucks. and I know sometimes we get sucked into that sucky place, even when we don't want to! I am thankful I can talk about it with you all since you get it.
Some days when I take that little pill, i think 'thank you'. Other days when I take that little pill I find myself thinking, 'what will you do to me today? Do I really need this?' Five or ten years of this? It really is mind-boggling. Sadly, the alternative isn't acceptable.
I miss talking to Mayor Beppy regularly. When I went down that hole she always reminded me that I had every right to complain, and she always made me feel better, even when she was in the hole herself. That is why we all miss seeing her here every day. I've never known someone who was more genuinely giving to others. Beppy, I hope you are reading along. I love you and wish I could just stop in and have coffee or tea with you this afternoon. Soon I hope it happens in real time.
In addition to the pain, I am having family issues and drama. Without going into detail, it appears that it will end up in court. In fact there is a hearing set for the Monday after Thanksgiving. Before this family drama stuff hit the fan I invited everyone here for Thanksgiving including those who are at odds with each other. Why, oh why did I decide to host Thanksgiving instead of just running away and renting a house on the coast somewhere? Hmmmm...I wonder if it is too late to do that? Anyway, under the circumstances, Thanksgiving ought to be fun. Not. Which pisses me off because this is the first year in at least four or five that both of my children and their families will be with me for Thanksgiving. Which of course is why I decided to host.
Thanks for the rant opportunities. Love you all.
Octogirl
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I'm in Crazy Town worrying about the reasons I am having a PET scan on Tuesday. So many thoughts and feelings, many conflicting. Ok, the reasons are 2 spots on my spine & some teeny tiny spots in my lungs. I feel afraid and also brave. And full of grief. & my back does hurt right in the middle; is that my imagination at work or real pain? Not helping that my husband is out of town right now. I also feel guilt, because I feel quite focused on myself to the exclusion others. I like RobinLK's analogy about the holes in the boats. Thanks for that. Helpful.
I"m going to distract myself by watching '8 out of 10 Cats does Countdown" on youtube. Makes me laugh.
Hugs to all, every one.
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Dropping by to provide a Beppy update.
Beppy's Dilantin levels have returned to the normal range. She is awake a lot more, too. She is in a hospital bed in their family room. Her DH and daughter must feed and clean her because she is too weak to do so. Part of the weakness is due to the amount of time she has been bedridden. He said it will be a long process, but they have hope that she will recover 100%.
Hugs, Octogirl.
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Oh PoppyK, I just want to cry with both relief and grief. I want our friend better. I hate that she's been through so much. This gosh darn cancer pisses me off!! I am praying for her strength to return. God bless her DH and DD!
Octogirl, I get where you are coming from. I am down in the hole with you. Wanna play cards? I'm having really bad stomach problems. When I saw MO last my stomach only hurt after eating greasy food which isn't often. Now everything I eat makes me queasy and hurts. When I don't eat my stomach burns and I feel ravenous. Does that sound like a SE or an ulcer? Do I call MO or my pcp? Also some days my right arm from the elbow down hurts so bad. Other days only a minor ache. I hate not knowing what to do.
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Molly, so sorry your gut is giving you grief. The nausea and pain after eating (which started with when you ate greasy food) sounds like classic gallbladder disease—inflammation, stones or sludge. The gnawing and burning when you don’t eat sounds like it could be an ulcer. Not an SE of AIs, as far as I know. Call your PCP first—sounds like the first step should be an ultrasound (and unlike a vaginal or pregnancy US, no need to drink water), then if it’s negative an endoscopy (not as bad as it sounds—I had two of ‘em); if that’s negative too, something called an ERCP (endoscopic retrograde cholangio-pancreography) to see what if anything’s going on in your digestive system. BUT considering all the stress you’ve been going through, excess cortisol (the stress hormone) can also tie your gut into knots.
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Thank you, Sandy. I will call my pcp. I get mild relief from ginger tea but I eat because my gut hurts and then regret eating.
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