CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.
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I nominate Octogirl as the official Crazytown Bouncer!
Should your nomination be confirmed (and your credentials are impeccable therefore I'm sure it's just a formality)- you are allowed to bounce any of the following:
- People who say they know how you feel
- People who says God never gives you more than you can handle
- People who can't wait to tell you about their friend who died from cancer
- People who tell you that you look great when you look and feel like shit
- People who tell you being positive will cure your cancer
- People who make even the most remote suggestion you brought this on yourself
- People who want to be your spokesperson to your friends but never actually are there for you themselves
There are other bounceable offenses, to be determined at your discretion.
Psychological warfare is allowed, along with the traditional, and well-deserved, junk punch and bitch slap.
Clear?
Let's get to work
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Katy, beautiful.
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Got it. I'm on it Katy.
I'd like to add to the list:
-'Friends' and relatives whose behavior, and indeed their words, reflect the belief that bc is contagious and that they will 'catch' it from me if we so much as have lunch together.
Thank you.
Octogirl
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I fast fowarded through the posts, but this was a great idea! I have had a pretty uneventful year since I finished chemo. Since my last PS appt I have noticed two small pinkish welts on my incision. I tried neosporine and they are still there (two weeks now). They have lost the redish pinkish hue and are more flat and tan - then look pink again the next day. I showed the PA in my MO's office last Friday and she thought it was a small irritation and my MO didn't even look at it, just said if it got worse to let them know. I then got a call from my BS office wanting to schedule an appointment for a possible biopsy. I told them I wanted to see if it went away. Still there, so I guess I'll see the PS and he may be able to shed some light on what it could be. Otherwise off to the BS I go for a biopsy. It doesn't look like much, but sheesh.
I had back pain and took one of my muscle relaxers and it went away. So I guess I can rule out mets to my bones.
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Rainn,
Will be thinking of you on Tuesday and I know you'll do just great. Maybe you could hitch a ride on the Popemobile???????
Octo,
Ok lady that's it.... You are security!!! Anybody second that??!
Katy,
You are absolutely wicked!! I love the Pinktober voodoo doll! PS: my Cancer card came in the mail today. Have fun with the Indian food. Looks like a great dish.
My mom was great, and she really was a pistol. She was from an old California family that came to San Francisco during the Gold Rush. Prior to that they were in New Orleans from 1818... Her family was originally from France but once they hit the U.S. Italians got in there.
I'm cooking an Indian dinner Wed night for our oncologist friend ( breast cancer specialist) who's coming from Tokyo to the oncology conference at UCSF. Any questions??? I know I'm going to ask him about those herceptin only things they're trying over there. Once I get the guy at the table and start feeding him, I'm gonna pick his brain!
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Holy smoke you Crazies have been busy today!!!
I Second the nominations for CT clown Ducky and CT bouncer Octo
Happy dance for Eggroll, sending good vibes for the braca test.
Rainn, will be lifting you up with happy thoughts (versed filled) to sustain you through the next few days. Hitching a ride on the Pope mobile sounds like a plan.
As to why I went MIA after 6 months posting 5 years back was due to a major car accident with 6 broken bones that landed me in the hospital for 10 days and rehab for 25 days along with 7 surgeries over 2.5 years, so yes life got busy and took bc off the front burner. I am back to offer encouragement and support. It takes a while to find the right group to click with. Of course I identify with the Crazies.
The topics and banter are amazing and get me out of my head (stuck in a traffic loop anyone?) Just today.. mom's, raccoons, food, knitting, kids, grands, great grands, DH, DAH and the list goes on. I am learning to lighten up and see the humorous side of things. (Having a boss that comes out and says "there is too much jockularity going on" when we converse too much doesn't help)
Later canceristas.
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Thanks everyone. I very much hope that by the time the pope gets here I will be home on my sofa! Just to complete the religious context for my surgery week, it is the day before Yom Kippur and two days before the muslim holiday of Eid. I'd like to think that between all of these there will be some positive karma in the city.
Octo, I'm fine with you as bouncer. Can I add: People who make your illness into their drama. Eesh.
Rose, wow. You have had a time. Glad you're finding C-town the place to be.
Eggroll, so glad for the good news!
Homemom, good luck with the biopsy.
Gaia, that Navy Yard photo is so familiar. It's very close to where we live! (And yes, give me time to get back on my feet and we'll hold the local chapter meeting of the Brooklyn crazies.)
Sula, my question for your MO friend would be what is the latest thinking on best practices for preventing brain mets in HER2 patients (now there's a c-town thought!).
Well, today is the first Friday in four months that I will not be hooked up to an IV. Savoring the moment. Last night's CSA share included two small eggplants--some good inspiration here. And corn and peppers and tomatoes and arugula and and and....
Happy Friday, everyone!
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Rain, yay for no IVs and will be thinking of you Tuesday as well! I enjoyed my CSA this week but I would have loved eggplant and arugula, sounds wonderful. We had corn (I will say that the only decent corn I've had this year was from the CSA), tomatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, bell peppers...
Went into CT for a bit last night. The suture-that-just-doesnt-want-to-finish healing (stjdwtfh) started bleeding last night. Or so I thought. Took a closer look and it wasn't the suture at all: it was a little popped sore or blister nearby on the breast, that had been caused by skin irritation from the bandages for stjdwtfh.....when I saw bs for my weekly check in Wednesday (I swear,sometimes I feel like I will be seeing her every week for the rest of my life while stjdwtjh just takes it sweet time) she said she's very happy with the healing, but noted that my skin is just tired of bandages (no shit!), so I have graduated to just a bit of gauze held in place by a bra. (Unfortunately I already had the little sore that went south by that point). It is helping my skin but I am not a fan of sleeping in a bra. Will I ever be able to come to bed naked and feel whole again? Ok, you can imagine how that thought set me off into tears last night.... . and then I went into 'what the hell does she know? She is just a surgeon and that is BLOOD' mode. Anyway, I tried to tell my hubby how I felt and also told him that it had to be blood cancer. Hubby took my hand (he does try to be supportive, but he is rather, well, literal sometimes).. but, he just looked at me like I was, well, CRAZY....
I don't know if I mentioned here, but when I started chemo they gave me a teddy bear. Corny and cute as I said on one thread. I removed Bear's pink ribbon tie (shudder: otherwise he was perfect) and named him Gabe. Gabe sleeps with me (us) now, and I know Gabe understood. He did keep that silly little grin he always has, however, which makes me wonder if perhaps, um, Gabe is a bit crazy too. One of these days I will post Gabe's pic so you all can be jealous of the cutie I sleep with. :-)
Today's another day. TGIF.
Octogirl
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Can I be the official hugger for CT Town?
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Rain: thank you for making me go look up 'Eid'; my first thought was "Wait a minute, that was way back in July...."
Mommy: there should be a hugger for a lot of these lists. Hoping we can make that an official position for this list.
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Rainny..My gosh.. Sounds like there will be lots and lots of positive karma with everything happening! It'll be do good to be on the other side of ypur surgery!
Octogirl.. I am.so jealous of ypu having a Gabe to sleep with..!! I can't wait to see a pic of him.. I want one.! We all NEED one.!!
Mommy.. I think you would make a wonderful CT Town hugger :-)
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Well I just got back from the PS and they told me what I see are microscopic spider veins! I'm like....really?? Cool!
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I will have to keep an eye on you! That's so cool to see that we have the same stats.
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HomeMom...that is so great to hear and I'm very happy for you.
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Nominating Mommyas Official Hugger.
There are no restrictions on who may be hugged. Even people recently bounced. They might be confused and need one too.
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Octo- glad you have Gabe too. And that we all have Mommy. I should have just seconded the motion. I believe Lucy " firsted" it.
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Hi all you crazies
i am in the eye of the CT storm today. Having lots of hip/sacrum twinges and it's hard to be mobile and I just feeling scared that I will never feel right again.... oy
My man is pressing me to take the pain meds that MO prescribed - and that is a story ( my MO actually said 'I'm the candy man, tell me what you need'- I don't know whether to laugh or be horrified by that statement). I only aquiesced to the prescription to put my man at more ease. I don't have a judgement about pain meds, I guess I just don't know what they are really going to do. I know that sounds ridiculous; theoretically I have an idea of what they do. I guess I just don't see the long range benefit; meaning it's not going to fix what's causing the twinges.
And I am calling them twinges cause they only jump out at me when I move in certain ways... if my ass ( getting wider by the minute) is on the couch I'm fine. So what's the point of the med. Ugh I'm rambling and frustrated because I have a food order for next week that requires long range planning/prep and I really need to get one leg of it started today, but instead I'm a puddle on the couch.
Sorry to be a downer today. Any CT words of wisdom accepted
And I'll drive by for a more complete hello later....
for now I third or whatever the nominations of Octo and Mommy
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Christine- my words of wisdom are these:
Give the pain meds a try. Cut one in half if you are worried.
The way they are supposed to work is to attach to pain receptors in the brain if you are truly in pain there is no " high" or abnormal sense of well- being, and therefore no large risk of addiction or craving. But everyone does have unique responses. You are smart. You can be alert to unfavorable changes in your body and mind. But the pain meds are there to prevent pain. Not chase after it. Take them before the pain gets really bad and you will end up taking less. It's true.
The goal for you regarding pain meds should be to be able to do things in your life that you wouldn't be able to do without, and without addling your brain.
Be careful but be brave. Big hugs and a mojo drip you can call on whenever you need it.
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Good Morning Crazies!!
Sula, Sending good thoughts to you on Herceptin day!! What a wonderful picture of your mom. Thanks for sharing it with us!! I think we may perceive our mothers differently than others. My friends always loved my mom and thought she was wonderful. She absolutely was wonderful, but she was also extremely controlling with her children, and family, and very distrusting of the outside world. She did not have an easy life, which contributed to her distrust of people. As a child, I had no understanding of her struggles. As an adult, I was able to gain insight, and finally, it all made sense to me.
Here is my question Sula: I've traveled far and wide (on the internet), searching for someone with my diagnosis. The American Cancer Society looked all through their database, and no one can match me up with a person that was diagnosed with two tumors right next to each other - one being TN and the other HER2+++. Is there ANYONE out there??? That was one of the very first questions I asked on BCO. and have never found anyone. I've never been able to communicate with someone like me. I'm told that it's rare, and does happen, but none of my doctors have seen it in their practice. I guess it's more of a frustration rather than a question. NEVERMIND - said like Gilda.
HomeMom, Welcome to our thread!!
Yes, we all enter the wonderful town of Crazy when some unusual bump, lump or rash pops up on our bodies!! If you're a TRUE crazy, you will have the Crazy Town kit. It comes with a flashlight, magnifying glass and mirror. In fact, I'm thinking about passing a kit to each new member upon their entrance. Good news on the spider veins!! Happy dance for you!!
PTS, Yes, you've helped so many people on these boards. We are all so lucky to have you here with us!!
Poppy, Any word on your US? I was told if mine look bigger on the US than it did on the CT scan, they will do a biopsy. I'm curious if they are going to biopsy yours.
Ducky, That was beautiful. I've found some lifelong friends on BCO. I also found a wonderful, better than I could EVER ask for, BCO mom. Your stories, advice and great humor have made my life so much richer!! Love you dear Ducky.
Lucy, I've also wondered if it's healthy to stick around, and occasionally, I will take a little break when it gets too overwhelming. I've made so many wonderful friends here (including you), that it's difficult to stay away for very long. You are ALL always on my mind. That's why I think it's so important that we have some fun and laughter on the outskirts of Crazy Town. It helps to dull the harsher realities of life. When my time comes to leave this world, I want to go out laughing.
Katy, Open and flowing- I very much agree. "It's really very simple." That's a quote from my DH. I didn't fully understand those words until my near death experience.
Indigo girls - good choice. I am heavily into folk rock and have always liked their music. I think it's very cool that Amy Ray started a nonprofit to promote independent musicians. It's tough out there for new artist's. In support of musicians, I've always paid for ALL of my music.
Rain!! Oh no!! On the subway??????? He was kidding, yes?? It's good your son's 16th is coming up. What a wonderful distraction!! We will all be right by your side.
Octo, I appoint you Crazy Town Bouncer!! I will start on your cape this weekend!! I made Ducky a crown because she is the oldest. Our DH's and family....bless their hearts....cannot understand the crazy. It's just not in their brain wheel. Can't wait to see the picture of Gabe!! When I was in 6th grade, I came down with mono and an enlarged spleen. I was in the hospital for a week. At the time, I was living with my sister in CA. I spent a year here due to family issues (not my own). When my parents flew from NY, my dad gave me a bear. We called it sick bear. Many years later, my dad had a few open heart surgeries. Each surgery, I would put sick bear on his hospital nightstand. When I was in the hospital in '03, my DH put sick bear on my hospital night stand. I've had him since I was 12, and he watches over my family when they are sick.
rose, you've most definitely suffered far more than your fair share of health issues!! I'm glad you "clicked" with us!! It's great to have you here with us.
M0mmy, I appoint you the Crazy Town Hugger!! In Crazy Town, you can be ANYTHING you want to be!! I will be busy this weekend making capes again!! hahaHope you're all having a pain free, peaceful day today. Love you all!! Hi lurkers....come join us!!
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I want to add to the list of bounc-able offenses: I was once told that I probably "contracted" my BC while working with cancer patients at a treatment facility. REALLY???? Did y'all know you were contagious? Ridiculous.
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Gaia -
I'm like you. I don't like to take ANY medication, and pain meds make me nervous for a number of reasons. I also find myself thinking - it's not all that bad, I can handle it, etc. While they won't address the cause of the "twinges," they will eliminate the symptom, i.e., the twinges, which will help you better function - both mentally and physically. Pain is tiring, and overwhelming and can reduce you to a puddle on the couch.
I had a similar experience during chemo - I had pain, nausea, etc., but didn't want to take the meds. I spent a lot of time on the couch, trying not to think about either.
You're not a downer at all - there is a lot to adjust to in a very short time. It sounds like the pain is getting in the way of your life and work, which can only be causing more stress. It's so important to take care of yourself. Hugs to you.
Barb
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Gaia, We cross posted.
Katy gave you excellent advice, as always. Start out small if you're uncomfortable with the pain meds, ask you MO about cutting them in half. I know some can be, and others can't. Another option to consider if the pain med doesn't work, is a muscle relaxer. I take one every night before bed, and it makes a world of difference for me. I'm so sorry you're in pain. I wish I had the power to take it all away.
M0mmy, As official hugger, I think your services are needed for Gaia!!!
Edited to add: Gaia, I know there is so much information to absorb at the beginning, I just want to make sure you saw the post about doing your infusion over 90 minutes? They typically like to get you in and out quickly, and will infuse in 30 min. Many have found, including me, reduced bone pain over a 90 minute infusion.
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Gala, pain meds--gee I got called an addict on the Weight watchers thread and ended up leaving the post after that, I had taken anti inflammatory for my back for 3 days. Dang but I got myself in major problem for basically not taking pain meds. Do take them and just keep in mind the suggestion of your doc. It will help you heel faster, that from my foot doctor after surgery a few years ago. I think the fact that folks like you and me are so aware means we will not get in trouble with them and will take them in a responsible manner. I will confess to testing the Tylonel for help whenever first and well, sitting on my lovely heating pad now. Now I am hooked on that!
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Also, please don't ever feel like you are being a "downer". We are all here to support each other...we hold on to and celebrate the good times, and hold each other up when one of us isn't doing well. You can talk about anything on this thread. We are ALL here for you.
pennsygal, It's good to see you!
yogamama, Welcome to our thread!! There is no cure for stupid unfortunately. Please pull up a chair and join us!!
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Thanks Slowdeep - This is my first brush with "OMG is it back?" Can it morph into skin cancer and butt muscle cancer?? Your brain just jumps to conclusions it simply wouldn't have before, just because you've had bc. PET scan said I have nothing else going on, so why worry that it is lurking in the depths of my body somewhere just waiting for that one glass of wine to put it into overdrive? Such silliness, right??
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Homemom, not silly, we have all jumped to the same things
good thing though is we recognize the crazy thoughts and well, now we have this Crazy town to visit
A pal of mine called me this morning and asked if I wanted to do a bus trip to upstate NY. I said yes without even asking how much. Cause CT says to live life and enjoy the folks in your life now
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the eggroll MIGHT have a touch of acne. But everything else looks fine and healthy.
Sula, that is wild perspective to be a child of an actress. Golden girls wasn't my thing, but I loved Maude!
My family was not expressive in any way. I hugged my dad less than three times in my life and I can tell you he was the best most loving person you would ever know and want for a father - odd?
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HomeMom, Crazy Town wouldn't be here if we didn't all have those same thoughts. It doesn't get an crazier thinking a melted piece of chocolate on my chest is skin cancer. haha The goal is to spend as little time in Crazy Town as possible!!
PTS...YES!! Good for you for going. I agree!!
I don't think it's odd Kathy. Men didn't physically express their feelings in those days.
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Kathy, your family sounds like mine, but I am Pa Dutch and we are not the huggy type
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