Uplifting and Lively Messages. No holds barred..
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Here are some pictures of my transplantings and trimmed up shrubs... I pruned so much of the two flowering bushes/// azelia and rhododendrum
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Michelle - What an inviting looking front door & porch, along with lovely plants. Beautiful pots you are using, too.
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Michelle, beautiful! I'd love to sit and have a glass of iced tea on your very inviting front porch. I love it and your pots are very nice!
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This was in my Garmers Almanac this morning and I thought it was very inspiring. I hope you enjoy it too!
Fair and green is the marsh in June;
Wide and warm in the sunny noon.
The flowering rushes fringe the pool
With slender shadows, dim and cool.
–Antoinette Alcott Bassett0 -
Farmers Almanac not Garmers Almanac. My wondering fingers are at it again lol
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Pretty flower and pretty saying!!! I want to plant ornate grass between each of my shrubs - the five across the front. I am wondering if any of you have knowledge of ornamental grasses? I have purchased blue rush, but I think it is not very dense.
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Just wanted to say hello as I will be starting tamoxifen soon and looking for some positive thoughts about it. I am still indecisive about whether to go back for mastectomy or not, and whether to do radiation or not, and the genetic test and OncobypeDX test results that I am waiting for may change things up even more. But I know FOR SURE I will be starting tamoxifen and feel pretty OK with it. I am 49 and perimenopausal, already started having some small hot flashes on my own anyway
so I am hoping it won't be too much of a jolt to me. My cancer is 100% "strong staining" er+ so it just makes sense that I will try to do well on the tamoxifen. So I think I will jump into this friendly thread 0 -
EpicSquirrle, welcome. Michelle will be along to welcome you as she is the "Thread Mayor".
My diagnosis was very similar to yours when I was first diagnosed but it took my insurance 5 months to approve my surgery and my BC had progressed to stage 2. Anyhow, when I joined BCO I hadn't decided on what I was going to do BMX, DBMX or lumpectomy. After reading so many profile diagnosis', surgeries and treatment plans, I had noticed the amount of mastectomies that where done after having a lumpectomy and the recurrence rates (not all of course) after lumpectomies. So, I had decided to have a DBMX and not have to worry about recurrence of BC in my actual breasts. I know it can show up just about anywhere in my body even with the DBMX. For me the surgery was a one time experience with another a year from then for the TE exchange. It may not be what you want and it's a very, very difficult personal decision to make. There are way to many difficult decisions to be made on our BC journey but we do what is best for ourselves to survive. I'm taking Arimidex and I was a bit worried about starting it's been 4 weeks and so far no SEs. . Best wishes and good luck on making your decisions.
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Hey, EpicSquirrel, as Lori said, welcome, welcome welcome to this thread. And, I personally know what you are going through, because I walked that path, and will be walking it for 5 years with Tamoxifen.
My opinion on lx vs. mx, and I have debated this with BS and MO and this is what I learned. If you have no node involvement, a low stage 1 or 2, and a low grade 1 or 2 on the Nottingham scale, lumpectomy is generally preferred bymy BS and MO. The reason why is because of two things, 1) complications from overtreatment - pain, implant rejection or encapsulation and musculature issues, 2) if bc does progress, it is easier to find bc in the breast than to go looking for it in some other place in the body. By keeping your breasts you will continue with mammograms and followups with your BS, MO, and obgyn. With a mastectomy, you will not have mammograms. Survival rates are virtually the same, and you keep the feeling in your breasts. If you have a recurrence, then you can have a mx. I like to get six month mammograms and check in with the BS and MO frequently - it keeps me honest. This is just my opinion and you have to have discussions, over time, with your doctors to see what is right for you. If you choose not to do radiation, then an mx would be the best choice. Radiation was a cake walk for me, but I was prepared.
Tamoxifen, well you can read through the thread and will see how I arrived at my Tamoxifen decision. It has been a really good drug choice for me, with minimal side effects. I was not in menopause or near it at the time of diagnosis and wanted to take an AI. I had major dental work and still need to do one implant - strike 1. After the dexa scan we found mild osteopenia in my hips - strike 2. There was no strike 3, I chose Tamoxifen. When I thought I was going to take an AI, I had an oopherectomy and hysterectomy, for which I am thankful. My cycle was every 24 days and my doctor thought I might go into menopause over a 3 year period. Medications worked out the way they did and I feel amazing. I am also grateful to God that I am doing well, that I have bc.org as an enormous support system, an 18 and a 20 year old to keep me "hip", and an amazing husband of 23 years.
Girls, how about those ornamental grasses????
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I am always reading the post but never seem to have time to post! We are having a pool installed and it is taking all my free time that and the grandkids being out of school on summer break. Today is the first day I have has an opportunity to sit in the recliner watch and episode of Hoarding (keeps me clutter free!)
Love all the pictures of the beautiful plants and flowers. I can't wait to landscape our yard when the pool is finished!
I have been on tamoxifen for 3 months and have had no real SE. My hair has become a little dry and that's new. I just use more conditioner and argan oil. I did have a little acne the first month (reminded me of the break out I would have in my 20's from birth control pills) but seems to have corrected itself.
Have a beautiful day!
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Hey, Vargadoll.... you do not look old enough to be a grandmother, unless you had a child at 16 who had a child at 16... Landscaping is a never ending pursuit for me. We have rental properties and sometimes I feel the need to redo something. Right now, I am trying to figure out where to put some ornamental grasses.
I watched the hoarding show last night, in the middle of the night. It really is an eye opener. I will continue to give things away, until I only have the essentials left. Both kids will be on campus this semester, and I think I would like to purge a great deal more things. The less things that I own, the more simple my life will be.
Sounds like your pool will be up and running soon!!! What kind of space are you working with that you want to landscape?? Great job on the Tamoxifen....it is so doable.
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Hello Ladies
I to always read the post but rarely post but had to reply to your post about hoarders and purging . I love the show hoarders and have been on the purge for several months. I have this uncontrollable desire to simplify our lives and we simply have way to much stuff. I have become a firm believer in Less is More . Hubby and I both love antiques and collect certain items but those are not the items causing the issues.
Our kids are both married with families but seem to think our basement is a holding station for stuff they want to keep but not at their house, so I gave them 3 mts to get it or Goodwill does ..
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Good morning from NC ladies! Michelle, I have 6 grandchildren! 11,10,8,4 (soon to be 5) and a precious 3 month old. (Who's delivery I missed because of stupid BC) the 11 year old has been staying with us since Baby Charlee was born. I just turned 52 last week. We have rental properties to. I don't do much with them amymore. DH handles all of that. In the past I would clean them when someone wold move out and get them ready for the next tenant. DH really didn't want me to do that anymore because I would always end up with a sinus infection or some other respiratory illness after cleaning them. The area I want to landscape is in the back in the pool area. We did an above ground pool (in ground hurts your property value here because no one wants a pool....crazy! WHO doesn't want a pool lol) I have a few beautiful plants already that will get to stay were they are and have a few that will need to be moved. My Rose of Sharon is blooming now and it is popping with flowers! More than its every had! My hydrangea is busting with blooms to. It's just going to be fun to play in the dirt when the pool deck is finished. DH is doing the deck so it's taking a bit longer than contracting out. He's working on it every spare minute he has. I hope to have a get together for the 4th and have all the kids here and our parents plus an uncle and his wife. I got to get moving PT is at 10 and I have 2 kids to get up and 3 beds to make!
Have a blessed day!
Teresa
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Vargadoll, you had us at the word, "hoarders". I think alot of people can relate to the situation. Children of parents who grew up in the depression, a time in which every nut and bolt was kept, had an impact on those who lived through it. I don't remember a time in history that hoarding was even discussed.
Here is a little excerpt on that topic that I found on the internet:
Surviving the Great Depression By Using Every Available Resource
To survive the Great Depression and make sure that whatever money was available was used for food, parents and families learned to make every available resource stretch – and they taught that technique to their children. Clothing was never thrown out. It was sewn or patched for re-use, and when it couldn't be worn any longer or handed down to another child, it was made into quilts or other fabric-based needs. Furniture, appliances and anything mechanical that couldn't be used any longer was saved. After all, you never know when you might need a part from an old piece of machinery or furniture to stop-gap or fix another one.
The "holding on to what you have" philosophy was one of safety. Nobody knew when the Depression would end or if it would get worse. The option to simply buy new things wasn't there. Most people wouldn't have survived if they hadn't learned to "hoard" possessions.
But Then the Depression Ended
Of course, as is evidenced by our opulent lifestyles today, the Great Depression ended. Unfortunately, the mindset of needing to hold on to every single thing a person owned didn't. And, to a certain degree, one can understand why. It also might be more acceptable if this belief had stayed within a single generation. After all, it is fair that if you once experienced the fear of not having anything, you would then cling to what you did have.
However, not only did the Depression generation themselves become "stuff clingers," but they transmitted this belief to their children who began to transmit it to their children, and the cycle perpetuated.
I am the daughter of an 88 year old, and my dad would have been 100 this year. They were both affected by the depression and the time thereafter. My mom came from a family of 10 children and my dad was orphaned by his father. It is incredible that what affected them, has a profound effect on us today. (I say this as I am emptying out a closet that I have not touched in years.) I was busy raising my children, running sports clubs, and having my youngest graduate high school last year. Then boom, breast cancer in August 2016. Thank God for the Goodwill, Ebay and other resale stores!!!
I also think that breast cancer has taught us all a lesson in figuring out what is essential and to keep only what you need. As HoneyBeaw stated above, she is having an uncontrollable urge to simplify her life. I think we appreciate the small things, but it is hard when big "stuff" gets in the way. I am on a journey of the mind, body, and spirit and part of the "mind" includes clearing the cobwebs in my brain and in my house. So far, so good, and this site is really great for support for all of these journeys, not just the breast cancer itself.
Hugs to all....back to sorting....
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That's exactly what my friend and I were talking about this morning! The Great Depression and how it affected so many of our older relatives. My Mom is 83 and my Dad is 86. My Mom was raised in a large family in an area of Cataloochee and we're very poor. She talked of sneaking on to farms at night and stealing vegetables just to keep from starving. Her mother died giving birth. My Mom was 4. The baby only lived a few days. That left her and 6 other children to raise themselves. Their father had to find work anywhere he could so he was gone most of the time. Dad didn't have it as bad. They both were very thrifty while I was growing up even though they didn't have to be. So I am thrifty to! Lol It's not a bad thing either. We are such a disposable nation now. The things that are left st our rental units only shock me!
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My mom is a hoarder or was until she had to go into a nursing home. It took me almost 4 weeks to clear out her efficiency apartment that we set up for her in our basement. She refused to do what her doctors told her to do and when I was diagnosed with BC it became impossible for me to take care of her any longer. The morning of my first chemo treatment I found her on her bathroom floor. We gave her a call button to push if she needed help, she refused to wear it and therefore spent the entire night on the bathroom floor. The hospital the ambulance took her to was across the street from my Chemo Center. My poor hubby was running back and forth all day to keep up with both of us. When mom was released we took her directly to the nursing home. A year before she spent the night on the bathroom floor she fell and broke her hip because she refused to use her walker as her doctor told her to. She wants to come home but I don't have the energy nor the want to to take care of her right now. Bad daughter I know :-(
Teresa, I'm a grandma too! I have 8 beautiful GrandAngels Derrick 21, Nicole 14, Kourtney 11, Kylie 9, Trent 6, Jacey 4, Olivia 2 and my beautiful 8 month old little man JJ. They keep me on my toes and feeling younger than my 57 years!
I love this picture and verse it's calming for me, I hope it's calming for you as well.
They flash the wings returning summer calls
Through the deep arches of her forest halls.–Oliver Wendell Holmes (1841–1935)
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WenchLori- they keep me young to! The 11 y/o is an awesome guy calm and is a rule follower, 10 y/o girl is little miss mom and I think she could handle a home of her own now! 8 y/o is the only child of our daughter that passed away unexpectedly in 2013 and we only see her a few times a year, she is a bossy one and will stand up for herself. The 4 y/o is a sassy little girl who will tell you if you take her shopping with you that things don't look good on you! The 2 y/o is my baby guy and he is into everything! If it has a handle he's going to pull it. The 3 month old is my beautiful little Charlee. She spent 2 weeks in the NICU due to the cord being wrapped around her neck. She's our little miracle and seems to be developing normally. I can't imagine my life without them! I never knew I could love someone so much! When I got the BC diagnosis all I could do was worry about the kids and who was going to help them. I'm always there for whatever they need.
You are not a bad daughter! You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else. I have a multiple handicapped child who is 28. I have to make myself do what rights for me because I'm in it for the long haul with her!
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Wench
Your not a bad daughter, you have to take care of you first and then Mom.. Hopefully she will start following the Dr orders now .
I think we are all at the age where our parent lived through the depression and it did effect them greatly .. Once while fixing a quilt my grandmother had made I found inside the quilt , used as batting a old coat, along with another old blanket and rags. .So parents and grandparents were bother hoarders so I always feel bad just throwing stuff away. I always have to find someone that can use what ever I have .
I also have 3 grandsons, Two wild 2 yr olds and 3 mt old baby Gus , my biggest fear is that I will not be around for them and they will not remember me..........
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Wow, alot of us are effected by this phenomenon. I have 3 or 4 different wardrobes. My executive wardrobe - that is scattered between home and storage, my skinny size 2-4 wardrobe - that I am giving away because I know longer want to be that size, my athleticish wardrobe that I wear all the time, and my larger sized (L, XL) better wardrobe. I feel good about consolidating my stuff.
My children, 18 and 20, keep me young. My daughter just came downstairs with a muscle cramp in her back and I told her, "put a bar of soap on it." She looked at me a bit later and said, "mom, it works." I said, "I know, but I don't know how!" The tidbits you pick up from breast cancer.org.....
Lori, don't be hard on yourself. My sister, who is single, takes care of my mom who is 88. She keeps all the income from my mom and takes good care of her. I could never do what she does. My other sister took care of my dad until the day he died in 2006. They are both pretty amazing and they are twins.
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Help!! I need a shovel for all this stuff. I got too hot and kept finding things that my husband stashed away that were mine!! His idea of getting rid of my clutter - just put it in my closet, etc. and it is gone. I got too overwhelmed today from all of his help and had to stop. I also have to be in the right frame of mind to get rid of my stuff. I have two mattresses and my daughter's vanity in the middle of the room, which is so inconvenient. I need strategy...any ideas??? I am having a hard time staying focused.
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My hydrangea! The blooms are huge this year♡
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Nice flowers!!! Vargadoll.
I have been thinking about my need to get rid of stuff and the summer solstice. I look forward to that day, June 21st all year long and somehow always feel a change on June 22nd. I googled what I was feeling and the following is what I found, and it makes sense to me except the faery references.
Summer Solstice
BY SHERYL PAUL, ON JUNE 21ST, 2010
Today we transition into summer through the portal of the Solstice, the longest day of the year. Like the wedding day, a mother's labor and baby's birth day, and moving day, today is the transitional marker that separates the old stage of life or season from the new. As such, it carries a vulnerability and potency that is available to us when we intentionally choose to connect to its energy.
In honoring the Solstice this year, I turned to one of my favorite books for celebrating rituals with children called "Circle Round", by Stawhawk, Diane Baker, and Anne Hill. They write:
"The Summer Solstice reminds us that nothing lasts forever. We do not live in the unchanging twilight realm of Faery, but in the living, dying, fading, and growing realm of earth. Whenever something is completed we must let it go.
"Because the things we love don't last forever, we love them all the more while they are here.
"But letting go of things and people we love is never easy. The Summer Solstice is a time to practice giving things away, letting go of what is completed and done – whether it's our old toys, a flower, or a part of our life, like being a baby or a little kid.
"Letting go or something doesn't mean just getting rid of it. When we let go, we allow someone to change and grow and become different. A mother lets go of a grown child so that the child become independent. Mom can be happy her child has grown up well and strong, but she still might be sad that her baby is gone forever.
"At the Summer Solstice, we remember that those times of feeling happy and sad are very special and sacred ......
Transitions, when approached consciously, provide opportunities to practice the art of letting go. And when we aren't in the midst of a rite of passage or personal transition (becoming an adolescent, getting married, leaving a career), we're offered the seasonal, archetypal transitions to practice letting go and making room for the new parts of ourselves to emerge. Not only do we practice letting go of what is completed and done, as stated above, we let go of aspects of ourselves that are no longer serving us.
I thought that passage was very insightful into how I am feeling these days. I am even more delighted to continue my work in creating a path for myself, by making room for the new part to emerge.
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Michelle, I really need to get busy getting rid of things too but I just can't seem to get started.
Here's my list of interesting grasses to put between your bushes.
Blue Oat Grass zones 4-6
Purple Love Grass zones 5-8
Hot Rod Grass zones 4-10
Prairie Drip Seed Grass zones 3-7
Waving hello to everyone 👋 and sending gentle hugs to anyone who needs one 🤗
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I love the ornamental grass! I hope to get busy planting some when my mud pit in the back is finished! DH is working on the deck today and I will be moving river stone to border the pool.
The purging piece. When I got the BC diagnosis I went crazy getting organized and getting rid of things that I had stored for years. It felt good and I am still at it! I have had to ship for new tops due to the compression sleeve. I can't stand for the top of it to show. So mow my closet is packed full yet again! I don't want to donate the tops I'm not wearing this summer due to my hopes of wearing them next summer or possibly even later this summer.
Have a beautiful day ladies!
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I ended up planting 8 blue arrow rush grasses. I have 2 left to plant. A cat had been in my flower/bush area and, of course, I dug right into it. I wonder what I could put out there to deter cats, but not other wildlife. Our neighbors just let their cats run everywhere and don't take care of them. Ugh.... I will take pics later of the grasses. I really liked the other grasses that Lori showed us, but they get very tall. I am going to look for taller plants to put behind the shorter blue arrow grasses. Maybe, I will look later in the fall. Has anyone planted the colored grasses? I think they are so cool, but wonder how they look amongst plantings.
I did get some work done in one of my rooms and will try to walk at least 4.5 miles by midnight. I am only at 3.03 miles right now. I am baking my 4 layer gluten free chocolate cake for a cook out tomorrow and just appreciating the nice weather we are having today. Whew....I have to keep on keepin' on....as they said in the 70s....
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Did a 35 mile ride today prior to it getting beastly out, followed by a quick trip to the farmers market. Lettuce is gorgeous, not to mention the strawberries. Ride was interesting as the Feds have shut down a key bridge over the Snoqualmie River. Fortunately, there is a path and footbridge over the river nearby, so had to take that both ways. Issue seems to be that the bridge wasn't constructed quite as designed. Oh my. I see litigation ahead, not to mention inconvenience.
Otherwise, I am still setting up my new computer. Nice to be at the point I can enjoy things again as opposed to endless hassle. Still need to reset passwords to a number of accounts. Just not there quite yet. This is cutting into my eBay shopping, so getting serious!
Thought of you Michelle when approaching the Redmond Market. Lots of different grasses, but I must say that it was the blooming lavender that caught my eye. Everything is so fragrant here, and lavender does extremely well. One of the reasons that my ride was so wonderful.
Off to do a strawberry shortcake ride in the AM followed by a quick trip into Seattle. It's well after 10 and just getting really dark now. Off to bed in a few, now that things are cooling down a bit. (I don't have AC, but then, don't really need it either.)
I can hear they coyotes in the distance..... - Claire
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Claire- the bike ride must have been lovely! We had rain of and on yesterday which limited me to very little outside time. We grilled out on the veranda and enjoyed strawberry shortcake while watching the multitude of lightning bugs. I think u had 10 miles in yesterday all day in and around the house. I didn't get to "hit the treadmill ". It's downstairs and my girl got up early so no lengthy stays downstairs. It's going to be a little cooler today (70's) and I have great hopes that DH wI'll get to work on the pool deck. Heading to church soon...have a blessed day ladies!
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Michelle, some animal sprays are meant for domestic animals and wildlife won't mess with them. I used mouse traps, (25 yrs ago before animal curilty laws) once a cat has been scared by a mouse trap they seldom if ever return. Most wildlife tends to steer away from the traps but will return once the traps have scared off the cats and the traps have been removed. At the time animal control told me to use mouse traps as they are designed to kill mice not cats. The cat's owner will remove the trap from the tail, butt etc when the cat runs home. I'm sure its not legal any more. The neighbors didn't like it but after having so much damage to my flower beds it was what animal control suggested as cats are free roaming animals. Better yet, call animal control to see what they recommend. No, I'm not curl to animals, I welcome all stay cats, raccoons and possums and feed them on a regular basis. My hubby says my wild animals eat better than he does.
Praying everyone has a blessed Sunday!
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Oh, coyotes, love to hear them howl on a quiet, late fall night. I always heard either them or the dogs barking or howling when I grew up in a timberland. I like the idea of lavendar, and checked into growing it in Illinois. I think there are some various ones that can be grown here. Your bike ride sounds so awesome, and with good finds at the farmer's market.... Claire, what do you like to shop for on Ebay? I just bought some Butter London fingernail polish last night in my favs Toff and Mums the Word (nude) from an Ebay seller.
Vargadoll, a veranda, a very southern feature. When I got married I ordered urns from a magazine called "Vintage Veranda." They had gorgeous pieces and I bet I had them for 20 years. I would love to see some southern pictures.
Lori, I am about to get some mouse traps for the cats that continuously poop in my flower and bush area. I am wondering about some sensored lights that I could stick in the area that would come on if anything moved. Our neighbors are so negligent when it comes to their cat. I would not let my dog run around pooping on other people's yards. Yet, somehow these particular cat owners do not care where their cat goes.
Tonight, I saw some really pretty deer near my sister in law's house. I bet there were 20 eating soybeans. I don't think I can make my chocolate cake anymore, because I am so burned out on heavy duty rich chocolate. Ugh. I was up in one of my rooms again today finding stuff that my husband put up there, that I had lost track of over the last 2 years. I am digging out and finding floor. Most of my things are in plastic totes with lids. I plan to push to get rid of things things this week as well.
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I am tired tonight. Ran around dropping things off today and clearing out my extra stuff. I have some things to put on ebay, and some to go to a resale store. I donated a bunch today to a charity. I can't wait to have less stuff. Less stuff = less time worrying and taking care of too much stuff. I want more experiences and less things. God help me get there!!!
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