Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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Oh my goodness I swear I am not making this up! My doorbell just rang, it's the guy who mows my lawn - he just ran over a bees nest and they are swarming all over the place and apparently pretty pissed! Thankfully, he is OK, not one bee sting.
What's next? Locusts?
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No worries, wish.... all of this crap does suck. We just have to look for the tiny inspirations to keep going. I just saw that this morning and replied before work... :P
No hard feelings... after all, we're all paddling pretty much the same boat.
Speaking of which..... I suddenly started getting bills for all my doc visits (BS, onc, etc). Come to find out, the authorizations had expired, unbeknownst to me. Anyway, after a few phone calls, it looks like Aetna is going to allow retroactive authorization requests from my PCP. Sheesh... I'm so happy about that. Otherwise, it was hundreds of $$ I owed.
Anyway, happy weekend everyone!!!
Miss S
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Oh my, how does one run out of authorization for a tx for cancer I wonder? Insurance can be so strange, and just plain a pain. We (no one) should have to do this addition stress of dealing with insurance while in tx or immediately after (for like 5 years!
CMB? Man, I'd be considering moving with all your pest problems! J/K of course, but you've been innundated lately for certain! Must be he bothered the nest hey? We've had 2 situations in downtown here and where i'm from up this summer that had bee swarms and had to call in keepers to get them out of the town! Scary for anyone who's allergic!
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((((HUGS)))) you guys! Thanks for all the love.
My (stupid!) IOS today is that I stopped by dh's aunt's house for a visit and ended up falling on my a$$ in the gravel driveway. It scared the bejeezus out of my kids and hurt like all get out, but I had to just shake it off. I didn't want them freaking out! Thankfully, I didn't hear anything go, "CRUNCH!" except for the gravel and there was no blood involved. We even managed a quick trip to the store before I realized I just needed to get home, take some pain meds, and relax. I'm planning to "live it up" these two weeks before the TAXOL starts, so I sure hope the rest and meds have me fixed up quick. I've always been a klutz...and an inventive one at that. I think I'm probably the only person I know that has had an unfortunate driving while knitting accident. My brother likes to call it the "putz factor" and blames it on my dad. Brother has me beat, though...he was attacked by a concrete deer in his own backyard a few years back. LOL!
((((HUGS))) and "THAT SUCKS!" to all. Have a safe and happy holiday weekend!
Diane
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Diane, good luck with your treatment, stay off the driveway, Love, Maryiz
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cmb35,
Oh, no!! Ants? Dead mice? BEES! what next? That truly sucks!!
yes, it is nice to not have to work for THREE whole days!! Tuesday is my next day to work.
Shirley,
I am looking forward to seeing you again on Friday... Maybe I'll call you this weekend!
Diane,
Taxol sucks! I didn't get Taxol, but I had taxotere. It wasnt' too bad, but I don't want to get it again! I took L-Glutamine during my chemo, and it seemed to help. I didn't have much trouble with neuropathy, so it must have helped.
If you have ever had Neulasta, then you may know about this, but just in case you didn't get it, if you DO get Neulasta, my chemo nurse told me to take Claritin (regular, not Claritin D) for 3 or 4 days after getting Neulasta and it will help with the bone pain you may get from Neulasta. I didn't get any bone pain, but I took the Claritin. After my 1st tx of Taxotere & Cytoxan, I didn't get Neulasta... instead my idiot onc waited 10 days, and did bloodwork, and my wbc tanked (of course) so they gave me Neupogen... for 4 days, I had to give myself Neupogen shots! OMG! Did it ever hurt! The bone pain was just terrible! And, no one told me to take Claritin, so I don't know if it helps after Neupogen.
A hearty THAT SUCKS to everyone!
Harley0 -
cmb, pests suck! A hotbed of revolting pests especially sucks! I suggest repeated use of the word "vermin" in a princess tone of voice. That always works for me!
Harley, working too much sucks. Your dh expecting you to be able to set your own schedule sucks! I am sorry, but what universe is he living in?
I wish I could see Shirley on Friday!
Diane, progression sucks the worst, I imagine. I am so sorry. Also, stay out of driveways! Hope everything is okay! Sorry, no taxol advice as I did my Taxotere along with A/C....and I am so glad it's over!!! I just finished three weeks ago yesterday....still tired. Toenails have like blood-blister looking things under them that seem to be getting less already, and I have numb/tingly big and second toes that also seem to be getting better. Lots of lotion, rub it in with as little friction as possible, exposure of feet and hands to lukewarm water only (not hot), elevate them as often as possible. I even put them up at work, and if my boss raises an eyebrow, I just say, "Doctor's orders..." (but I am a government employee). This is all advice for neuropathy, NOT hand/foot syndrome, which can also happen from the taxanes but is very different. There are some good links for it on the "Starting Chemo in May" thread. There is also a thread called "Tips for getting through chemo" pinned to the top of the chemo forum that is very helpful and will also let you know a little of what to expect. How old are your kids? Can they and do they help you at all? I know you still want to be able to do everything yourself, but save your energy for the fun stuff! And NO cleaning!! (Have you been to the "can't get my act together" thread? I think iI have seen you over there)....anyway, you are in my prayers, Diane. Remember, "she who shall remain nameless: who is currently taking a break and will reincarnate hopefully soon" once said "I have accepted Diane/badboob as my personal saviour"...so you must be doing something right!!!
Traci, can I call you this weekend? Let's talk on the phone, girl! I still have your cell number, but I want to make sure it's okay to call just to get to know you, not because I'm going nuts from scan fear!
My son and his gf are so happy in Pittsburgh! I met her grandmother, who said, she has a curfew, don't worry. I said, I'm not worried, I love her! I want her in my life from now on! And then we all sat in her kitchen and had coffee and cookies and got to know each other a little. It was wonderful. Sam has completely furnished his apartment from craig'slist and things people have thrown away that are still perfectly good--I am so proud of him! His apartment is neat and organized (I know he cleaned it just before I came, but it smelled clean, you know? You can tell if someone has cleaned just because company is coming!!) I gave him money for a mattress, but he had already bought a bed frame w/slats and a bedside table for $85.00!!
Anyway, things are good and I know my energy will return soon....just in time for rads. I start Wednesday, I think. Yesterday was the day I would have had chemo if I wasn't finished, and I noticed today that I feel just a tiny bit better. Maybe it's psychological, but I'll take it!!
Sorry for the ramble.
If you read this far, I love you.
Love,
Sue
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Sue,
Glad to read that you are feeling better, if only just a little bit! You WILL feel better, dear! It just comes back way too slowly! I didn't have to get rads, but I am sure that they SUCK, too.... I'll be praying that rads won't SUCK too badly for you. You deserve a break!
Oh, and I wish I could talk to Traci, too!! She is so funny, she would raise my spirits, I just know it!
I'm having some issues at work, having problems counting change out.... I just get this brain fart or something. Nothing that really merits a 'that sucks'. You are right, though. My dh is the one who pushed me to go get a job, and now he is complaining cause he never sees me anymore! Either I am working, or else HE is working!!
Diane,
Progression SUCKS! Falls on the driveway SUCK!
... DRIVING WHILE KNITTING?? LOL Please, you will need to tell us that story!! or did you already post that story, and I just missed it? Oh, and how was your brother attacked by a cement deer? Please explain... LOL ROFLMAO!
Hope everyone has a great weekend!
Love ya, all ya'll!
Harley
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Glad you asked about the stories Harley, b/c it saves me asking! Curiosity is killing me here!
I feel for you with the jobs and not seeing dh. I think mine wants me to find one now but uh....his day off (or 32 hours) is different each week depending on his runs and I'm pretty sure, any job I get will NOT let me work a schedule where I call one day and say, OOPS! Dh is coming home tonight, so I won't be here tomorrow! UGH!
Plus Michigan is like the highest # of poverty level now, factories and industries are moving south (of michigan or the US) by the dozens, thank you dear governor, and jobless rates on of course in our counties and surrounding reaching the double digits! Dsis is bugging me to get a job with bennies. Hm....we are in a city with about 10,000 locals, and 26,000 students and the college and casino are the largest employers. Bennies are something that has been cut by the casino b/c of course, people with no money in the state aren't running to them and the college and market hire students, b/c they don't have to pay more than minimun and/or bennies, so there is NOTHING here! And with gas, and old car, how long can I afford to drive an hour to another town to work. Am I nuts, or is she? HA! I know...it's me...I could flip burgers I suppose....but I doubt even mcD's offeres bennies here
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A big hello and hearty that sucks to all who need one.
Diane: I hate breast cancer and hate that you have progression. I think each chemo has its own set of side effects - none of which are pleasant. I found with taxol and then taxotere, that I was able to get to know my side effects and then treated them before they came. I would get bone pain in my legs the 2nd to 3rd post chemo day - so I took a darvocet before the pain started. I would get buzzed from the steroids they give you with the taxol and the darvocet seemed to help me with that. Ate lots of dry fruits and fig newtons to fix constipation. The hardest part for me was the fatigue. The same thing happened to me as someone else mentioned. I was told I didnt need neulasta with taxol. Well they were wrong - so watch your blood counts. You definitely desevre a big that sucks.
Miss S: When I first came to bco I spent most of my time on the chat. I remember so many telling me that taxol was easier than A/C. I was so excited when I finished a/c thinking the rest of this who treatment thing would be easier. It wasnt.
Cristine: "Damitol?" Oh my you just made me laugh.
Colleen: I cant imagine taking care of a house alone. That deserves a big that sucks too. I tried going to Gilson Park yesterday. The entire summer they have had the road leading to it tore up and I thought surely - this late in summer it would be drivable. Not so! I have missed my walks along the shore of Lake Michigan. Still thought of you and Pammy on my attempts to get there though.
Diane: I do believe this year I am the queen of falls - so definitely know how your feeling. Hope your not too sore today.
Harley: I have been having lots of problems with numbers since chemo. Definitely experiencing brain farts.
Sue: Partly psychological, but more physical. Im so glad each day is starting to get better.
Wish: With the gas prices the way they are, is she crazy or what?
A big hello to all I have missed. Will just have to start keeping up from here. No big IOS for me today. First day of my vacation and Im doing exactly what I planned on doing. NOTHING. Hoping none of you are in the path of the hurricane Gustav.
Nicki - aka chemosabi
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Wish,
You are NOT nuts! And with the cost of gas, it wouldn't even pay you enough to work someplace p/t at minimum wage, with no bennies.
I am sure that any employer would not like it if you asked for days off to co-ordinate your days off with your dh. I have tried to do that with my job, but she makes the schedule on Wed., and then she is off (usually) on Thurs. I have been working almost every Thurs., so when I go in, it's SURPRISE! You are working on Tues., Wed., Thurs., and ... Saturday!!
It is impossible to find a p/t job here in this resort area that has bennies!, or one that isn't retail... I used to work in an office and I feel more comfortable just answering phones, and typing all day. I NEVER worked retail before, and I am hating that most HOLIDAYS you are expected to work. Now that I am having problems counting the change, I don't know what I can really do there... let's see... I can't fold the clothes the way they want them folded, I can't wrap gifts (well, I CAN wrap my own gifts, but I get nervous when the customers are watching me, and I have to make them look 'just so'...), and now I'm even having trouble counting change... There I go, and I said that I wasn't going to complain...
oh, and cmb35, they are having trouble with ants at work. They offer samples upstairs, where I am working, and even though I wipe the counters constantly, when my boss came up at the end of the day, she started wiping everything down all over again. I guess that is why the other girl who works there seems mad at me.
Sorry for venting...
Hope everyone has a great Holiday weekend! I will...
Harley
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I found this thread about a month ago. All of you have routinely made me laugh and improved my day. Last January my onc told me I had many new progressions of bone mets and 3 spots in my lungs. The tumor markers went up from 888 to 4800 january thru july even with a new chemo (#8 in 3.5 years) So the past 8 months has been one big IOS. However, yesterday results of scans showed no changes in the lung scan from January, a few more new bone mets but the CA 27-29 DROPPED to 3817. I figure thats a net gain of 1200 down
Still going to have to continue the doxil. Side effects aren't bad enough and I still have too much hair left, so he is going to increase the dosage to the maximum amount next week-- can't wait :P.So I mostly just wanted to say thanks to all of you for making my days brighter.
Helen
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Awww {{HELEN}}! A big That SUCKS for your IOS
Man, that's a long and arduous journey! I'll keep a prayer in my heart and only the best of thoughts that this chemo continues to show regression and no new bone mets SO sorry to read that!Harley Girl! You're sounding back to your feisty self. And that sounds great!
Nicki! Enjoy your vacation time friend!
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Nicki - Glad you liked the "Damitol" - it just seemed appropriate!
cmb - Dead mice, ants and bees?! Oh my!!!
Diane - Ouch. Glad nothing went "crunch", but don't get any bone pain before your time!! lol...
Harley - Working sucks. I have been trying to figure out how to work even more part time now, with the weekly txs. And Clairtin does help with both Neupogen and Neulasta.
I'm doing o.k., but have had a slight fever on/off (nothing over the magic 100.8 though) and some aches/pains. But NO nausea or yuckiness like before, so I guess it's better. My IOS for today (so far) was that I had to be up and out of the house by 9:00 AM to drive 10-15 minutes to the onc's office for my 20 second Neupogen shot. They still haven't coordinated with my insurance so we can do them (again!) at home. I will be there everyday for the next week (except tomorrow) for either shots or tx. Sucks.
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Geepers Christine, that does suck! Daily trips for a 20 second shot, darn it! Isn't there a clinic near you that can administer it, even if they aren't the prescribers? So sorry you have to do that
Glad though you're not having the N/v, although the aches and pains can go too huh
Hang in there girl. Hopefully your insurance will get straightened out soon!0 -
Wish - That is the closest clinic!! And what really sucks is my dh is an RN and perfectly capable of administering it! In fact, he had been until our billing provider for our insurance changed. So I feel you on the insurance crap, too.0
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Man, that is nutty! So do you think they are going to allow it at some point, or not with the new program? Realy stupid they'd pay for that in a clinic that far away, but not for your dh to administer it. Or yourself for that matter
So sorry you are dealing with this. Just a waste of good money that could pay for an MRI down the road instead 0 -
Cristine: I remember dragging myself back to the oncs office for those shots. I could have easily have given them to myself - insurance denied that option for me also. Sure doesnt make sense.
Nicki - aka chemosabi
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I've not read any of the posts..need to catch up. I've been too busy watching POLITICS!
I've decided to come here to you gals and ask for prayer. There's a long story to this, but I won't go into all of it.
My brother called me (from San Antonio) and his ex-SO died this morning. He has the two children, 8 and 5. I became her friend when she was pregnant with the first child. I flew to S.A. to help with my mom. Anyway, my young friend who was 37 (the age of my middle dd) was addicted to heroine and alcohol. She had multiple health problems includiing diabetes and Hep C. No matter how much of a friend I tried to be to her I, nor anyone else, could get through to her. In fact, less than a month ago I talked to her on the phone...got upset with her...and told her she and my brother (he's not on drugs or anything..too old to be a father..64...and too much yelling in the house) need to get their butts straight..that if something should happen to them where would these kids go...to the state? They didn't live together anymore. She found a boyfriend who did drugs and booze with her.
I am extremely sad! I'm sad for those children and sad that she couldn't have been happy with how she lived. Her mom hasn't been in her life since before the 5 yo was born. She will be meeting him for the first time tomorrow..my brother called her..by brother was hysterical this morning..crying...not knowing how to tell the kids...they loved their mom even if...Anyway, when grandma looks into this little boys eyes she's going to see my dear young friend. She had the most beautiful eyes and her kids inherited that from her. My brother couldn't tell the kids so her mom will be there to support him. That, I am so thankful for.
Pray that these young, sweet children will be okay. We knew this could/would happen, but when it does reality says NO! I am so sad she couldn't get rid of these demons. I KNOW she loved her children, but was hooked on something far to big for her to control. When she would call she always sounded cheerful. But I know deep down inside she could not have been truly happy. I shed tears for her and the life she chose to live. They will do an autopsy.
Thanks for your prayers. Also, please pray for my brother.
Shirley
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Shirley, I will pray. And I am so sorry that you are sad.
Love,
Sue
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I just popped in to say hello and having a huge THAT SUCKS party myself. I had scans on Thursday and have starting having pain in my legs again so soon after the back surgery I just went through. Anyway, I have been staying very stable with my mets and haven't done scans in 9 months and these ones are scaring the crap out of me for some reason. The worst part of it is, all the crap they made me drink and injected into me had me sick for two days and now on day 3 I have ZERO energy. I had things to do and places to be this weekend and a thirty minute trip to the grocery store was a huge trip for me and landed me back in bed! I don't know what all I missed reading but was enjoying quite a few good lessons in noise making prior to my dropping from the planet into the land of sleepydom! Take care! Thanks for letting me vent!
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Shirley: Thats an awfully sad story. I so sorry for you, your brother, the children - everyone who will be dealing which such a sadness. Sending hugs to you, lots of prayers and a big that sucks.
LuAnn: It really sucks you had to get those scans right before the Holiday week-end. Leaving you to imagine the worse and not know what to expect. Hope you get lots of rest tonight and feel stronger tomorrow.
Nicki - aka chemosabi
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Oh Nicki, when I first started coming here, I only went to the chat rooms, too. Yet something else that is alike for both of us. I never cease to be amazed at all of our similarities, especially since we didn't exactly follow a normal pattern.
Most people do have an easier time with Taxol, but I have heard some say it was worse for them (exception to the rule). Most of the time rads for BC is easier then chemo, although, there again, you will hear someone occasionally say it was harder for them. Obviously, we all have our own experineces and we can only hope that those folks undergoing tx now will have the least of the least SE and soar through.
Something that drove me crazy when I was getting tx were the gals who would say, "Chemo is tough, but not that bad. I worked full time and never missed a day and I was the exercise instructor at the Y after work and after that I cleaned the house and cooked dinner when I got home. Then I put on something sexy to see if I could entice DH to have hot, wild sex." [Slight exaggeration possible here.] There I sat, off work for seven months, all sorts of various se happening to me, trying to defend why I was such a wimp. One reason was because I had to work full time or nothing. Personally, I really don't see how someone works full time during A/C or T without needing any time off. Anyway, my company held my job for me and I've been back one year!
Harley, I don't know why I haven't thought of this, but when my uncle died, my aunt went to work part time for the school system strictly to get benefits. She only worked four hours a day as the lunch lady. :-) Plus, she had summers off! So I imagine the school system might be a good place to look for bennies with a PT job! BTW, she loves it and ended up taking on more and more hours and working when she doesn't need to anymore. Hee!
Shirley, that story made me cry. I have a very close relative who is a 27 yo alcoholic and he is killing himself. I know he will probably die soon if he can't gain victory over alcohol and drugs. I am so sorry for such a young life lost and the two innocent children who no longer have a Mom. Hugs to you, dear friend. So much painful sorrow in this life.....
LuAnn, Hope your scans come back clear. Go ahead and take as many naps as you need. Try to force yourself to enjoy the long weekend!
Oh yeah, I got Neulasta shots the day after all my chemo tx A/C and T/H. I wish someone would have told me to take Claritin. I somehow missed that.
Love to all,
Miss S
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{{{Shirley}}} Of course, there are prayers to be offered up for those kids, your dbro and you too. Had tragic, that the kids won't ever know the good side of their mom. And hope your dbro can somehow stay in their lives in some way. Darn it's never easy to lose anyone, but someone young to drugs is so hard to understand. Why? I'll never understand the draw to heroine or the other hard drugs, never want to.
{{{{{LuAnn}}}}} Darn, I'm sorry you had such a reaction to the meds they use. Did you have that reaction last time you had them, or is this something new? Worse yet, on a good weekend to spend with family and have to be in bed feeling miserable. Many, many {{hugs}} you get rest tonight and can enjoy tomorrow and monday dear freind. And extra prayers that the scans show improvement and not progression. Perhaps it's something different that's causing this pain, like I get when I favor one thing, and another starts to hurt from the response to using it differently? Hope that makes sense. I had a hip problem once and ended up with severe back pain from the hip being out of whack and then the hip started to turn in as a result of that.....I'll hope it's something that was the result of something else and not the cancer for you. Something fixable with realignment or simple like that, K? Rest well if you can dear freind....thinking about you daily anyway...
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It's so weird how some docs tx with one thing and another with other meds. I got aloxi and decadron with my A/C and nothing before or after like some of you. So weird. And my counts were great. Yes, they dipped to 1.7 or some such thing, but never really bad enough to something. I wonder if the all the pre-steriods have something to do with the drops in WBC and such?
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Shirley--I'm so sorry...will definitely pray for your bro and the children...so very sad.
Within a day or so of my dx my dh's bro, who had 'disappeared' for 6 weeks, was found in end-stage liver disease and put in hospice immediately. He had been in and out of rehab for 20 years, and just could never make the break from his addiction. He was 54. Dh was able to get back to see him before he died, but was unable to attend the funeral b/c of my surgery.
It just makes it all the more awful that it's so darn senseless.
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Shirley, I just read your post and that is so sad! I don't understand how anyone gets into these drugs. I know here in cincinnati you have to travel into some pretty unsavory neighborhoods to buy them. In fact one lady was shot last year as she was trying to make a buy, was a mother from the suburbs and had no business being in this neighborhood. But knowing before you try them of the addiction factors and what they can do to you.....I just don't get it. Heck, I'm afraid to take too many of my pain meds for fear of addiction and am always trying to stop taking them but back problems and bone mets done really give you much relief to be off pain meds. Hopefully those children will be brought up to remember the wonderful things about their mom and not the drugs that controled the end of her life.
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Shirley, I'm so sorry -- that's so sad. You and your family are in my prayers.
Hugs,
Ann
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Hello all,
Nikki suggested I drop in on this thread. Tho I have been in the chat room for over 4 years, only recently did I learn how to navigate the boards-duh---call me Major Chemobrain. I didn't think this sounded like a place I would gravitate to on my own & I (of course) have not read all 125 pages, but what I did read makes me think I would have missed a good place if not for my friend's suggestion. Thanx, pal!
Shirley----HUGS. I always try to think of some consoling words when ppl tell me stories like the one you posted--- I like the fact that on this thread I can just say-------sometimes life just SUX BIG TIME!
Mishapen-I have never liked the universal "I never missed a day of work" line either. I was probably there in chat when they told you that & bit my tongue (held my own fingers?) from telling you that dh & I both thought chemo was gonna kill me! Some of us are just lucky I guess
Diane----I would really like to hear about the Knitting-while-driving accident---but even more---the Bro-attacked-by-a-cement-deer story! I was LOL & that was all I read!
Helen & Luann----hugs--my scan results on mon showed a progression in my lung----PISSES ME OFF for all of us--waiting for results or knowing crap news!
This is new for me---it felt good--but a bit "off" too! LOL I may have to see if this isn't a form of therapy! omg I could go on...........
You all be well & stay strong---or is that the wrong thing to say in here too?
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