Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
Comments
-
Sorry I've been at work all day and haven't had a chance to catch up on all the posts. Just want to say that it all sucks, truly it does!! I tried to comment on everyone's suckage, but now I am on a new page, and I can't remember all the stuff on the last page!! It sucks when you can't remember SH*T!
Sue, Rads suck! You are truly a brave woman, as are all the others who go thru that tx. I was a chicken, so I just had the bi-lateral mast., and was able to skip the rads!
LuAnn... I am so sorry you are having so much trouble!
Hi Nicki!!
We are still awaiting Hanna's arrival. Latest update is that she is expected to maybe make landfall near Wrightsville Beach, in the Wilmington area. They are not expecting the storm to strengthen too much, maybe to a very weak cat. 1 hurricane, if that. But, now we are concerned about IKE... He is also headed to the U.S., but maybe Florida. Still, Ike is a major hurricane, so we are being cautious.
We brought our deck furniture in from our screened porch, and the grill also. My MIL is worried, so she will probably come over and spend the night/weekend with us. We are going to have a party.
Hope everyone has a great weekend, with few IOS's!!
Harley0 -
That sucks to all who need it. Harley, be careful! Luann, sorry the pump is causing such a major IOS...
One big IOS to report on this end - other than today being the first day of school and a major drain physically - the cat got out again. H2B saw her twice today but she ran each time he got near her. WTH?!? I'm sure she is in the backyard, but when I catch her, it's back to the vet for a checkup - a whopping $135, I might add. Insert F Bomb here...
I'm going to bed so this day can hurry up and end already...
0 -
WhaSux? Too much today!
Maura--that sux! Hugs! I think what you are feeling is "normal & common" after all we have been thru! Imagine what these experiences can do to our psyche! It is post traumatic stress hon--you have a right--just know--- IT WILL PASS-------give yourself permission to go with it & also to do some real special things for yourself--a massage, a pedicure, lunch with friends, a day in a park with your dog--whatever! INDULGE & Pamper yourself & make some plans you can look forward to........sorry you have to go thru this.
LuAnn--you are really sending the suck-o-meter off the chart! I HATE bureacracy!!!! Holy crap! we are human beings facing major poo! How can they treat us like they do??? Let ME at 'em Lu!!!!! HUGE hugs to you-please keep us informed & I'll keep you in my prayers.
Traci--ty--I'm glad you didn't feel like working today! You kept me from having a really bad morning (rattling around the house like a marble in a bucket) with all your posts & making me lol---you were "used" today --- an angel with skin, as my friend says! HUGS
OK-- SORRY again about the pix---I deleted them--does that make it all better????? Cuz it was always ok on my screen, so I hope that fixed it!
A big huge THAT SIX to anyone who needs it!
Be well & stay strong
0 -
Randomness: Sue, when you said that you "had the remains of Gustav" I forgot that Gustav referred to a hurricane and had a momentary flash to Hannibal Lector.
0 -
Dangitall! LuAnn? Did you get to talk with the doctor yet? That's a HUGE BIG SUX! Darn it, I would be so going over that nurse's head. You WERE at the hospital once, and obviously something is wrong and obviously you've done more than enough, now why hasn't he called you?
Was he the one that did the pain pump surgery? IF so, I'd be calling his answering service, he must have one, doesn't he for off hours? Shooooooooooooot!
Wish there were some way to help you out, that just SUCKS big time dear lady!
Thinking and saying a prayer you've heard and /or gotten some relief this evening!
0 -
I had to cart my sorry butt off to another hospital this evening (at least it was closer to home) for another xray. I was furious wanting to know what else they needed xrays of since I already had about 8 taken earlier in the day. The secretary said he wanted to check for small bowel obstruction. why the heck would that only cause one side to bloat up though is beyond me. Anyway, after two hours at that hospital I was heading home and stopped at walmart to pick up some photos I wanted to mail to my son in Iraq. Well I thought I would try and sneak a peek at my xrays on the little photo machine at the photo counter instead of waiting to come home. This older guy comes over to help me and I said I was fine and didn't need help. When I realized I needed a pc and not just a picture machine to look at the xrays I took my disc back and went to pick up my pictures. So this man looks at me and says "oh, I see you are with child!" I could have hauled off and killed him. That just tops it all, pregnant is the last thing I want to be and this thing is growing so fast it is unreal! Lets hope my abdomen does not explode before my appt with this surgeon at noon tomorrow. And trust me, he will be getting a major earful. I got to figure out what all "Policies" I have when it comes to secretaries that don't have doctors return phone calls.
0 -
Oh, Luann! THAT SUCKS!!!!! I think the appropriate policy in the "with child" circumstance would be a well-placed foot in the offender's groin and a shovel to the head. I am so sorry you had such a sucky day and got the runaround. BTW, I think I may have "met" your nurse-from-hell on another thread. I hope you're able to get some sleep tonight and some answers ASAP.
Took ds #3 to the doctor and they gave him COMPAZINE and are keeping him out of school until Monday. He has finally been able to keep down the antibiotics but the COMPAZINE came back twice right after he swallowed it because his gag reflex is so heightened right now. Poor kid.
That sucks, y'all!
(((HUGS)))
Diane0 -
So Sorry about your dh, Diane. Poor kid and you too
Hate the flu bugs.((((LuAnn)))) Sweet lady, a bowel obstruction can cause one sided bulging, be/ it starts at the bottom of the intestines and the large intestines wrap up the right side, across the top end of the abdomen and then down the left basically before entering the bowel (which is a shorter piece). Might too much info but have you had troubles with completly emptying your bowels or a change in them since you had this pain pump put in, or even more recent? Could be all the pain meds are causing problems for sure. Did they say to try to heat on the abdomen or something like that? What did they say after this xray tonight?
Heading to bed, b/c I have to be up at 5, but will add prayers and good thoughts you rest better tonight dear friend.
0 -
last year when i was in er for excruciating stomach pains 2 days after surgery and 1 day after 1st chemo, a simple xray told them that i did not have a bowl obstruction as that would have meant surgery asap. it's inexcusable that they can take so many xrays and not be able to tell you a dam thing. i posted a nervous bitching thread earlier this afternoon but after i hit submit i guess it went into the ozone layer cause it's not here. my complaint was that after getting xeloda in 1 day i still have not been able to get tykerb. many phone calls with just as many answers was getting me very frustrated and nervous as hell. well this evening after probably a dozen calls i got the call telling me that it was approved (even though i've been told that since last friday) and that there is no cost to me...not even my usual co-pay. and it will be a 3 month supply. i suppose though that i won't see it before monday at the earliest. so that IOS has been resolved...i think. luann, i'm hoping that you get some answers very soon and relief even sooner. and i'd sure raise holy hell with that doc tomorrow.
0 -
LuAnn & Diane---THAT MORE THAN SUX!!
Poor babies, both of you! (& diane too, cuz being mom to a sick kid sux!)-------when are "older gentlemen" gonna learn NOT to ask such STUPID inappropriate questions?????? I would love to be a fly on the wall when that doc gets both barrels from LuAnn------keep us posted on both sucky situations. Hugs & prayers for son & LuAnn to feel better SOON!
0 -
LuAnn - That is completely awful and worrisome. I hope you're able to sleep tonight and go give that surgeon what he's got coming!
Diane - Yuck. Just sucks.
Sue - OW. I think I said that before, but OW. I hope they give you some tips or something tomorrow to help with this.
Yesterday's IOS is today's better news...and if you read this somewhere else, you are free to skip it!
I did not have treatment today. Last night I was the b*tch from hell on wheels - depressed, anxious, and mostly, in pain. Went this afternoon to my infusion and told them about my pain, and especially the burning feet thing. Everyone said "Neuropathy!" And they fetched my onc. He came out and asked me again about my symptoms and then asked (because he did not have my chart in front of him) how many txs with Taxotere I have had. "One and at a third of the dosage." Oh. Thinking, thinking, thinking. He asks me how many nodes were positive. "None." More thinking, thinking, thinking. Then he says "I can't give you any more Taxotere without the neuropathy getting worse." Bottom line is - the reaction I was having (or so I gathered) was quite unusual for the dose I got and they were worried my neuropathy would become irreversible at some point.
So no more Taxotere for me! I am having 2 more rounds of tx with my "old" friends, Carboplatin and Cytoxan. Most of me is really glad (because I was really hating this), but there is a tiny bit that is concerned about making the right decision and forgoing the Tax as it is one of the better txs for triple neg (or so I understand). Sigh. I am going to keep telling myself that six rounds of 2 meds is okay and better than a lifetime of neuropathy. And I still have to do rads. That was always in my future. Now my last chemo will be October 2!! Yee haw!!!!
0 -
Thanks everyone for the warm welcome!
LuAnn: What you have been through at the hands of medical personnel and no answer? I can't believe they just sent you home to suffer! Please let us know how you are doing today.
DRCISC: That chemo sounds awful. I hope you get some relief from the se's. Glad to see they reacted quickly to switch you back to what you were on. I have one more rnd of A/C and then I start Taxol which I am a little afraid of, but it seems to affect people differently.
Diane: I hope your son is on the mend.
A wig/hat/scarf exchange sounds wonderful. I have bought a few things, and they all seem to just accentuate my enormously fat, bloated face and scream "Hey, there's a bald head under here!" I ordered a wig off eBay a couple of weeks ago - still waiting for it to arrive.
Saint: Thanks for the reminder of the Heavenly Hats. I had bookmarked the site in a hurry one day, intending to go back and fill out the form. Of course I promptly forgot it. After you mentioned it, I filled out the form. I believe I have a black and white version of your cute little dog, named Cisco. He is my youngest of 4, at 9 months. I have Winston, the Yorkie (in my avatar.) He likes to play hide and seek inside the pillow case and pop out like it is a big surprise. Winston is my caretaker, and stays with me all day -napping with me or lying at my feet. He promptly clocks out when family arrives home from school and work. I also have a white Toy Poodle named Remy, and a 3 lb. silver poodle named Sachi.
Felecia: I want a Mac (whine.)
Maura: I find the whole experience of BC a little (okay a lot) lonely. Family means well, but they really don't get it. My friends have stayed away as though it were Bubonic Plague and catching. I hope rads go better for you. The only ones who seem to stick by us are our pets. Sometimes I cry for any or no reason. Then my family tiptoes around whispering about me in another room. Sigh.
Sue: Rads - I hope it goes well for you, and you figure out something comforting for your skin. I have that in my future, and am also very fair skinned. I find it hard not to think about the cancer, because my whole life seems to be about treatment, doctor appointments, tests - bleh. And I thought all the medical fall-de-rah for M.S. was bad.
A big THAT SUCKS to all.
Yesterday I had to go for another echocardiagram. As you know, chemo drugs are given by weight and I don't want to say how fat I am - but they do bring my chemo out in 50 gal drums.
I was having a very bad pain day due to MS, and yesterday I developed mouth sores even though I have been religiously brushing my teeth and swishing Biotene products. Plus I am allergic to every adhesive - including bandaids. For some reason the tiny bit of eczema I occasionally have on the back of my thighs has went into overdrive on chemo. Now instead of drying up quickly with prescription cream, it opens up leaving a little raw craters in each place. We have had no choice but to bandage and use tape as sparingly as possible. My skin reaction is now worse than the eczema, and yesterday DH pulled some paper tape off too quickly and ripped my skin open.So anyway, I get to the area to have my echocardiagram, and the technician pushed so hard it was very painful. I was beginning to wonder if she was drilling for oil with that probe. Thankfully she said everything still looked good from her perspective.
DH & I went out to eat, and my mouth and throat were too sore. I took a few bites of soup and salad, but nothing tasted good and everything hurt my mouth. The poor waitress was beside herself thinking something was wrong with the food. I finally explained it was me - not the food.
Yesterday was also a bad day for mourning the breast(s) I haven't lost yet. One of my chemo nurses had commented that if I only had 1 breast removed, I would list to one side and muscles would be pulled out of place. (Since I am in a wheelchair, does this mean I will just turn in circles?) I am very large busted - 48J - and that creates even more of a dilemma. If I only do the currently affected breast, I will not be able to find a prosthesis big enough to balance my "good" boob. Since I have IBC and it is so aggressive, it makes sense considering doing both anyway. I am sad that they will not consider recon for me.
Do you all get weary of the constant uncertainty? Am I doing the right treatment? Is it working? Should I be somewhere else getting treatment.? Of course they should take both breasts - anything to get me closer to cancer free. No, I don't want to lose them! Sigh. I know I will hit the - what if it comes back stage? - too. My mind never seems to rest completely, although I do feel more peaceful when I pray. I started out very peaceful and optimistic, but all this crap wears on you after awhile.
Enough suckage today. I can't figure out how to post pics. I just get a blank frame.
Here's hoping everyone has a better day with less suckage!
~Bliss
0 -
Oh Bliss. I am so sorry for all your situations. Man, dealing with MS in a wheelchair was enough without this added on top. I think you doing right (if my opinion even matter ), with doing a bilateral. Goodness, going in circles?
J/K too, but seriously, I would think that it would relieve some pain as she said with only one (48J) I can imagine your back is sore now anyway. You might notice an improvement in that immediately. I have a well-endowed friend with only F's and she's got the deep indentations from her bras and back aches, so I can imagine it will free you up some there. I'm so sorry you have lose them b/c of BC though. Yes, the worries are never ending...but as someone just posted in her 5th cancerveries as a survivor said, it gets better the further we are from dx and tx's. Have you talked to a dermatologist about the reaction your eczema is having from the chemo? Perhaps this is an over reactions and then it will clear up? I hope so for you. I do know that I had a very, very minor case of psoriasis pre-bc and A/C cleared it up immensely. It's still there now, 6 months out, but not nearly as bad. It's amazing what it cleared up really. Hope that's what it's doing to your skin. Perhaps it can be a pleasant SE and you will not have to deal with it post-chemo anymore?
Good luck on your final txs and surgery. Can't speak about T, b/c I didn't have it. But you are in my prayers for the remainder, to have the fewest of any SE's and a great outcome of your surgery. Be thinking of you.
0 -
Hi everyone:
I know " I am sorry" doesn't hack it, but I do wish each of you a better day today. A hearty " THAT SUCKS " for all the nasties, sickness, side effects, idiots, jerks,and a** holes one has to deal with.
IOS = Issues of Suckiness and I have made myself a bottle cover with " I Have IOS". If I dont want to answer what it means, I just point. Now I have to make one with " I have a policy"... My tshirt with " I Have issues" is good for those days when I am in a more than usual bitchy mood.
No real IOS for me today, unless you count the roofers using the automatic nail gun just outside my window.
Two positive things to report: Big Foot (upstairs neighbor) has moved out !!!!!!!!! And my tumor continues to shrink - weekly Tx # 4 yesterday of Taxol and herceptin. only 8 more to go.
Thanks to everyone for posting - I have laughed and cried over your posts. Helps me keep things in perspective when I start my own pity parties. HUGS and BLESSINGS, Nancy
0 -
Hey - the cat came back this morning - and I'm off to the vet in a few. Gawd! Love her to pieces, but the next time she goes out for a good time, I'ma have to take out a loan...
0 -
.
0 -
Hanna, you could always doll yourself up and proclaim that YOU are the HOT side dish. ;o) I'm wondering if the food is in lieu of a gift? Will you be writing your own thank you note before you leave the reception? Maybe you should think of something tackier than scalloped potatoes. You wouldn't want them to think you are puttin' on airs...LOL!
(((HUGS)))
Diane0 -
"I'm sorry - I have a policy." Would that be tacky? I'm sorry I go to weddings to celebrate a new chapter in life, except in October when my sister gets married (that's my ongoing ios, but it's not enough for this thread {yet}) so I'm not sure how I would react if I received an invitation with that on it. Sorry if I offended anyone.
Gentle hugs to all,
Trish
0 -
"policy"...LOL! Too funny Trish!
May I suggest a book on etiquette a la "Miss Manners" for the happy couple? <snicker>
Where is Rock? I KNOW she would have the *perfect* response for this one!!
0 -
Oh Rock, where are you ?
0 -
.
0 -
A covered dish to a wedding reception is funny as hell! What will they do if everyone brings the same appetizer?
The cat had some blood work done (results in a week), her ears cleaned and spent about 4 minutes with the vet. I have to return with a urine and stool sample later today or early tomorrow. For that, I just wrote a check for $171.50. Somebody, please just shoot me now...
0 -
Bliss, I am so sorry for all you're going through. As far as your surgery, there is much to consider there. With your large breasts, getting both removed would be quite a huge incision(s) with a tremendous amount of your body being removed. The recovery would be more difficult than with someone small. Also, even if a prothesis is not sold in your size, they can be special ordered or even homemade. Is IBC likely to recur in the other breast? I would definitely talk over all these things with my doctor to find the best decision for you. I hope your RX cream helps your skin pronto.... ouch!
Yes, Hannah, time for a policy. "I have a policy. I don't furnish food for wedding receptions. If you insist, I guess I could stop by KFC and pick up a bucket."
Saint... about the pictures... I was going to grab those! LOL I have been out of town and got back just in time to see you deleted them to fix the page. *sigh* Maybe I can get you to email them to me...
Felicia, glad your kitty cat came home. Naughty kitty.
Harley, I just got home from NC. I just did not want to stay and meet Hannah. I hope Wilmington fairs well. Have fun with your MIL!
Traci, I am so sorry about your darling baby kitty..... big hugs!!!! That is just too sad.
Badboob, hope your son is back to himself in no time.
LuAnn, how are you doing? With child, indeed. You should have told that guy you just needed to have a good BM.
I guess I should unload the car. LOL
Love and wishes for nonsuckage to all,
Miss S
0 -
16 minutes ago AlaskaDeb wrote:
All,
This is John. Deb wanted everyone to know that she came through surgury well. She is currently resting.
Thanks for all your support & Prayers!
GB
John
0 -
thanks for letting us know john. many many prayers were sent her way. give her our love.
my husband's cousin many years ago threw an engagement party for her daughter but they couldn't afford it i guess. so she assigned each guest a dish to bring. she wanted me to bring potato salad for 70-80 people. i told her she was nuts i was not going to stand and peel potatoes for that many people. i brought macaroni salad instead which was so much easier to make. all they provided was the beverages (no alcohol) and paper products. needless to say most people gave the bride a smaller gift than they would have otherwise. it's great to celebrate but if you can't afford it then don't do it or make it smaller. just my humble opinion.
0 -
Wonderful news about Deb! Thank you for letting us know John. I hope all of you get a good night's sleep tonight....we'll all keep praying for quick recovery for Deb and much sweeter times to come for your whole family.
0 -
Hanna,
Better yet, swing by KFC and then put the chicken in a nice wicker basket with some nice linens over it, and they'll think you made it yourself!!
Glad DebC made it through surgery okay...scary stuff. Wishing she and her family the best.
Jerseymaria, Bliss, Felicia, Diane, wish, Nicki, Harley, and anyone I may have left out, I just wanted to say......
Love ya!
Sue
0 -
luAnn happy you posted!
I hope that there is not too much IOS tonite!
Are you all watching the cancer special tonight
Dani
0 -
Oh my! Thanks for the reminder....now to find it! I liked it a lot better when we only had 20 channels instead of so many! I get lost, or lose my train of thought and .....what was I looking for? So I end up settling for some ol movie I see! Hope I don't get lost this time!
Now for the IOS's! Big That sucks ladies!
Has anyone heard from LuAnn today?
Is John, Deb in Alaskas' dh? I'm so lost! I need a thingy (what's the word) OH! Program to keep up! Man, that felt so good to find the word I was looking for! Yahhoooo! My brain is getting clearer! YEAH!
Just a quickie update to the insurance! WE HAVE INSURANCE AGAIN! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
BBL, stay well till then everyone!
0 -
Well a big THAT SUCKS to all! I haven't had time to read everything but wanted to stop in quickly. I saw the surgeon today and will be having surgery first thing tomorrow morning. The catheter in my pain pump factured and I am having narcotics and spinal fluid leaking into my abdomen which is causing the swelling. I will be getting the fluid all drained, the catheter fixed and put the pump firmly back in place. Wish me luck, hopefully I will be back on my computer tomorrow evening but if not I'll catch up with you all when I can.
0
