Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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No, dear Renee', not that we aren't allowed, just that many find it necessary after reaching chemopause or medicalpause to HAVE to visit a thread like the I want my mojo back found here: http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/7/topic/69566?page=73
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Oh Isabella,You've had more than a full day. Puppies are so cute, but so much work.
In the US, there is usually a case manager assigned to each patient in a hospital, and part of that person's job is to make the arrangements for the patient to get the care they continue to need after they leave the hospital. Either that person or the Social Worker should be giving you information about local facilities that have beds available. That is their job!
Does your Aunt have any friends who have needed to move into an assisted living situation? That might be a good place to start, and may help ease the transition for her.
A big that SUX to all who need it.
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Thanks for the clarification. Scared me:-) I understand the not being interested but loosing it all together.
Back to lurking........
Renee
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Renee you crack me up! I am afraid to tell when my last big O was....
Maybe someday but with no man or one in sight just doesn't seem worth it anymore.... Go enjoy your man and have some big O's for all of us! LOLIsabella, I would be pi##ed also! Nursing home care is the pits anymore. I know my brother had to find a place for his MIL, thank goodness he has plenty of $$$ to pay for more and $$$ and pull to get her in a spot that was probably meant for someone else. It still isn't totally what they want for her but it was the best they could find on short notice. We really need to pay more attention to how our elderly are being treated because that could be any one of us going to nursing home care any day, we just never know what life brings and I for one want to be in comfortable surroundings until I did.
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Depending on your situation, it can be a lot more than just not being interested, Renee. Being post menopausal brings with it, a dried up system. Things that estrogen keeps moving smoothly are now NOT. Think of estrogen as the oil of the body mechanics. Skin becomes dry and loses it's elasticity, bones begin to creak with pain and stiffness due to a loss of estrogen, hair and nails as well as the skin loses it's luster. Then there is the dryness of the southern regions. You can a lot on the thread I mentioned, but in essence, a post menopause results in loss of lubrication to the female genitalia. It can become not only dry and difficult but actually painful to attempt sexual relations. If a woman has had b/c, she's told to take an AI which makes sure the normal amount of estrogen produced in the adrenals and fat stores after menopause is NOT produced, so any problems arising form normal menopause is compounded. Certain should this problem be a mans problem, something would be found to cure it. But as yet, only estrogen is known to acttually take care of it. while I don't mean to scare you, it is something that is talked about a lot amongst us in that one thread. I'm sure there are many women who have the problems and just give up without discussing it with their dh's or doctors.
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Just a pop in to say hi and sorry about the crapiness going on. I was gonna type a long story about my day but I'm gonna go make some tacos instead.
Have I told y'all lately that I love you?
Hugs, Traci
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Isabella,
Here in the US we have facilities which specialize in caring only for Alzheimer's patients. The needs of someone with Alzheimer's Disease are so very different than the needs seen in a standard nursing home. After caring for my mother for several years at home, I placed her in one of these facilities. It's far from perfect, but it is suited to her needs and I still oversee her care. I hope you can find something like this for your aunt.
wish, you're quite right about the many issues chemo and other cancer meds cause with sex and orgasm. I will say for myself, that even though chemo caused my menses to halt, a steady flow of orgasms have kept any sign of dryness from appearing. I don't take Armidex or any other meds, though, as my bc was er/pr-. Sometimes one just have to take matters into their own hands. Right, Barbe?
Love to all.
Miss S
PS Traci, we want to hear the story...
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{[Traci}} We love you 2 dear!
Yes, Miss S, it does help to continue in the tasks at hand
But, I was just explaining that without ai, a woman does continue to produce enough estrogen to make a lot of those issues, doable. With the AI, there is almost or sometimes NO estrogen, and thats where the problems start. Just getting O's daily won't help for atrophy of the tissue, but can help with the relations...sometimes though, not always. 0 -
Wishiwere...Dad is 90, he's about to give up driving and usually has a friend pick him up for his meetings. Asking him to start dinner gets potatoes peeled and in a pot to boil, but that's about it.
My brother is a control freak. He moved in about a month after I was diagnosed and things have been dischordant since then. At 56, he should be mature, but his fits of control-mania show he's not. I guess he's that way since so many other things in his life have spun out of control that the few things he can control become uber-important. Like the fish. My whole relationship with him is one big IOS.
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Sorry for that Nancy, has to be hard to deal with along with your dad and bc too
i don't know how some of you manage, truly. It is good you can step away in those situations though. I suppose that would't be an option if he (db) wasn't there.0 -
I hadn't noticed that thread before. It has a lot of good advice. I can handle all the above side effects (have most of them already) but really woried about the emotional aspect. DH doesn't deserve to be dealing with an raving bitch. He's already had to deal with a sobbing, hairless couch potato.
I'm so overwhelmed by the chemo right now I don't want to even think about the rads then the hormone therapy. I tend to reasearch until I can't see any longer so I'm trying to take it one step at a time least I loose my mind. My husband will be pleased to see me researching sex and lubricants rather than diarea and constipation.
I will be rather pissy if I loose the big O on top of everything else.
Renee
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It seems REnee, where there is a will, there's a way. I don't think anyone who wants the 'O' has NOT found it, rather it just takes a different route than it use to, to get there
Thankfully 
And the Bitchy can be turned around if we remember to keep out whit and humor and learn to laugh along with our dh's at it, rather than turn it into a negative. It's just another step in growing older.........which is all of our goals really!
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I took me long enough to find the O I just don't want to loose it.
I've been on Prozac for 20 years so I say that depression is far and away more painful than anything chemo has to offer. So you can see that messing with my emotional balance is very frightening to me.
Wit, humor and laughter do make for a fabulous marriage. I just don't want to loose the magic.
Love to all.
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OK, since Friday everytime I click the discussion board link I get an error message saying the "site is down for maintenance" I finally googled breastcancer.org and the name of a thread, clicked on what came up, and was able to get in that way. How weird that it hasn't been down at all? What on earth could be causing it? I'm going to log out and try again to see what happens. In case I don't make it back - has anyone else been experiencing problems?
A big that sucks to all!
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OK, not sure if this will work, but here is the error message I get if I try to enter the Discussion Board via the link on the bco homepage. Surely this isn't just happening to me? Is that possible?
Hhhmmmm.... it won't let me copy/paste it. This is really weird! I'm feeling a little freaked out by it!
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Hey, can somebody send me a PM when you get a chance? This is just too weird, I can't see the Forum Index, and basically have to get into the discussion boards through a back door. I'm not sure if my PM mailbox is working either.
Gremlins you think? Something really weird with my computer that only impacts the bco discussion boards?
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Sent you a pm, hope it works.
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I usually come in through the email sent on updates but tried the bc.org and that worked too.
Have you tried to maybe shut down your puter for a full minute and restart it? Could be a snag in it somehow and that might fix it up
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chemosabi.....chemosabi......chemosabi...........welcome back!!!
Dream........you are an inspiration (((HUGS)))) and a big that sucks for all the crappy stuff you've been going through lately.
The big "O"????? Lost that one when I lost my boob and haven't gotten it back since.
I sure hope they improve facilities for the elderly in a big way. It scares the crap outta me to think I may need one of those places some day.
Luanne........nice boys! Hope you are having a great time with them.
Too tired to remember all.
Gremlins???? I find this site acts weird after a certain time of night> Everything slows down and it's hard to switch to were you want to go.
Nite Ladies!
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Do you know how to clean out your temporary internet files? That may be your problem, the computer has an old page stored and it keeps coming up. Here is how you do it for those that don't know how.
Click on the START button, look for your internet explorer button on the menu, RIGHT CLICK ON THE INTERNET EXPLORER BUTTON, you will see a menu option that says INTERNET PROPERITES.
Click on the INTERNET PROPERTIES button, a box will appear with lots of options. You should be on the GENERAL TAB when this box appears. In the middle of the box you will see a section labeled BROWSING HISTORY, you then click DELETE, the first option is TEMPORARY INTERNET FILES, you click the DELETE FILES button. This will delete all your temporary internet files.
This may speed up your access on the internet as well. If you use the internet alot daily then you should do this often to keep your computer from slowing down on the net due to to many temp files. You can also delete out your browsing history as well as other stuff here. You will do no harm to delete anything on this menu so clean away if you want to. I tend to only delete my temp files and occassionaly the browsing history. The rest of it I leave alone.
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yep...i can attest to it speeding up after you clear it out! Hadn't done in a year and it's like a new puter now!!
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Thanks for the tip Luanne. I tend to only do that after visiting a secure site like banking. I didn'y know we should do it alot more often!
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LuAnn, thanks for the computer tip! I just did it too and I'm usually so afraid to do ANYTHING like that to my computer.
What are temporary files and cookies?
And why would you personally only delete temp files and browzing history. Thanks again.
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LuAnn - thanks for the PM and tip, I'm going to try deleting the temporary internet files now, as it is still happening. It's really weird, and I'm really bad at anything technical - not a good troubleshooter at all!
Morning and a big that sucks to all! Back soon (I hope!)
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That must have been it! Thanks so much LuAnn! I wish I knew more about computer stuff, it seems like wacky things always happen to me with the computer, and I'm generally not able to fix them myself. I haven't been able to get onto this site since Friday morning, and all because of some temporary files or whatever! LOL
Also, to the other person that helped me out by sending me a PM, because I know humor and tone don't always come across well in writing, I'm just checking - that was a joke right?
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Not sure you are talking about the pm I sent you or not? I thought you had asked for a PM to see if you were getting them, so that's what I did
A pm saying something like, 'just checking 4 U....is that the one you are asking about?Cleaning you internet temp files takes care of any bits and pieces left on your puter everytime to download a program, or new page. These files aren't necessary anymore as a new page will create them again when you view it and the program you download only needs for downloading,and are not use again. It will not delete you favorites or anything.
You should also run a disk cleanup and defrag pretty often if you surf a lot.....cleans up the memory and makes what you use more easily accessible and thus, quicker.
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Okay Wish......how does one do a disk cleanup and defrag? I've never done either one. Sheesh, we need a computer maintenance thread
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Oh my.........Later after you learn how, this can be set up as a routine item to run while you sleep and is much better. I hate to do it during the day, b/c I forget to as often as I should and then it takes forever. If you do it on a routine basis, it doesn't require a lot of time.
So, with that....if you click on the start button and scroll up to the All Programs then Accessories, then System Tools and you'll see the disk defrag and the disc cleanup button. Two separate things. first run the clean up then the defrag. Clean up gets rid of duplicate files and unnecessary files, while the defrag put all your files in order so your puter can find them quicker. Kind of like filing in a cabinet per se..
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Wish - sorry! that was you, not LuAnn - my mistake! I also got another PM, which I'm assuming was a joke, but it was a little creepy! Probably just lost in translation... I didn't mean to sound like I thought there was a conspiracy or something, was just aggravated that I couldn't get on here all day Friday and all weekend.
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Whoops! Didn't mean to hit submit!
I don't surf alot, mostly just check cnn.com and weather.com, but I definitely noticed that my computer it MUCH faster after I deleted those temporary internet files (which took FOREVER, so I can see why you'd want to do it when you weren't trying to use the computer!)
So, the disc defrag and disc cleanup are different things than deleting the temporary files? I'm generally under strict orders from my "tech support" (my friend's husband) not to touch anything without checking with him - that was a result of me accidently completely deleting my windows (I think?) and replacing it with something. I swear, that time, all I did was click on that message that says, "your computer needs updates" like I had done numerous times before, but all hell broke loose!
Computer stuff gives me a headache, and that sux!
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