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Chemo in Sept 08

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Comments

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited February 2010
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    Beverly.....I'm sorry about your friend.  CANCER SUCKS A BIG ONE!!!!  I hate it...I hate what it does to us!!!

    Juli I'm glad your son is doing better now.  Stupid ex's.....I swear they should be put on an Island somewhere in the middle of nowhere.  

    love you all.....

  • Juli50
    Juli50 Member Posts: 652
    edited February 2010
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    Genia - Thanks & great idea! haha

    Beverly - 6-12 months was 2 weeks! geez... those doctors had it so wrong!

    big hugs all around Kiss

  • bar62
    bar62 Member Posts: 221
    edited February 2010
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    Beverly, I am so sorry to hear about your friend...she must have been stage  4 ...maybe. I am on my son's pokey computer for now. It's hard to play FB games on it but I am online and I have my Blackberry, thank goodness for it. I can at least get online and see how we all are.

    I will definitely be on that cruise with  everyone...

    Juli, how  about those insurances. My ex dropped my son when we moved home to care for my  mom...arrrr...I hope  your son continues to get stronger..

    Genia...How could you not look out for you?  You have to and please let it all out here. 

    Please take many many pics when you go on the cruise...whenever you can. You may need a wheelchair.  When I attended  an outdoor general admission Russell Crowe concert in Austin, TX. they  pushed me, sat with me and treated me wonderfully. We'd formed a Russell Crowe fan club, that went really well  for us, until he exhibited his bad bad  temper to all of us...then kaput...he lost us as  fans forever.

    soft warm hugs  everyoneSmile

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited February 2010
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    Hi Girls,

    Spring I am so sorry to hear about your friend, and shocked at how fast she went.That's very frightening. Like you say all the more reason to live for today and hope we can continue doing it for many long years!

    I was waiting by a tram yesterday and saw a lady running from a distance to catch it, It was just about to leave so I pressed the button and opened the doors to give her more time to reach it. She jumped on just in time and then I stood back as It wasn't the one I was waiting for.  So many people smiled and you could feel the good energy all around.  It is so easy to help others and be kind. I thank you all for being kind to me.

    Have a great day girls. Singapore Chris x

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited February 2010
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    I think Marlana was Stage 4 and they somehow missed it. Which makes me upset, she goes to the same place i do (or she did go there, God this is hard, that she is gone, as in past tense, ugh). I mean, if you had a limited amount of time, it would change what you did.

    I would not do aggressive chemo and radiation on a breast!

    Sorry. How could they miss this? I am going to ask when I go in April. 

    Love you all. LIVE FOR TODAY!!!!!!

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited February 2010
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    You are right Spring, I have a good friend in Singapore who found out that she had breast cancer that was already stage 4.  She is only 41 with young children, and they didn't do anything to her breast at all. She had a completely different set of drugs, but it was chemo and is now doing really well,the cancer is in complete remission although she does still have to take maintenance drugs.  Every case is different, but why not ring the Dr or send an email to ask for an explanation as you are with the same Dr.  Better that you find the answers you are looking for now and not wonder for another couple of months. There may be lots of circumstances that lead to the awful consequences, but I am sure you will feel better when you have the facts.

    I came across this phrase some time ago and it is so true:

     "Speculation is the enemy of calm"

    Make sure you get lots of hugs from your DH today Spring.

    Take Care, Singapore Chris x

  • BrandonMom
    BrandonMom Member Posts: 209
    edited February 2010
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    Spring, why do you think she was already Stage 4?  ust because she passed so quickly?  If so, I have seen other women who passed very quickly after learning they were stage 4.  Some cancer continues to grow despite treatment (so could have not been stage 4 at diagnosis but then spread during treatment).  Some women live for years once they are diagnosed as Stage 4, others pass very quickly. 

     I know that isn't very comforting.  It is very disturbing and hard when someone you have gone through treatment with pass away. I went through the same thing when a woman I was friends with during radiation, passed away just after Thanksgiving.

    None of us know how long we have.  There was a wonderful, energetic nurse at my oncologist, that passed away sudden from a stroke.  You would have never known that was going to happen, and if they couldn't have caught that when she was working in a doctor's setting with people that knew her well, then I'm not sure what more any of us can really do.  When God puts his arms around you and says come with Him, then you travel home.  We are only visiting this planet.  When I look at the beauty this world has, it does make me wonder how amazing Heaven must be/

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited February 2010
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    Do you all remember when you were first diagnosed? I had a lot of scans (CT scan, Bone scan, etc) to see if it had spread. I remember feeling great that it had not, seemingly, spread. However, my ONC told me that cancer could be in there and not detected (she used the end of her thumb, saying, if it isn't this big, it could be there and not detected.

    So i think my friend Marlana must have already had this cancer there, and it was not detected by the scans. I am sad about this. I know she suffered a lot through treatment, and I just wish she would have had better quality time.

    Thanks Chris and colleen. I've seen you post that before, Chris, Speculation is the enemy of calm. :) 

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited February 2010
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    Hi Girls,

    Colleen I really liked what you had to say to Spring, when something awful happens it is good to have a nice way to view it.  I too have known people who's treatment didn't work and just grew even with chemo, I counted myself very lucky that mine was being killed off.

    Let's not assume that we have a tiny bit of cancer that has not been seen, let's assume that we are all healthy and cancer free! and that Genia's lump is a cyst!

    Have a lovely weekend ladies.

    Singapore Chris x

  • BrandonMom
    BrandonMom Member Posts: 209
    edited February 2010
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    Guess who had clear scans???  I had clear scans!!!  Woo hoo!!  Passing the all clear baton to Genia! 

     I had such a bad feeling after the scans, because I had the feeling they were getting the radiologist to check before I left (usually not a good sign).  I called my onc right away and asked if they could call when they get the results.  They did!  I'm going out tonight to celebrate! (maybe in the way of too much info, but hey, we've been through a lot together, she said the only thing my abdomen CT showed was that I was constipated!  I knew that, and the contrast took care of that problem too!  That's probably what the radiologist was check before giving the all clear.)

     Hugs everybody!  Eat a cupcake, tip a glass of wine, whatever you do to celebrate, and join me in a celebration!

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited February 2010
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    Colleen!! YAY YAY YAY!!! Woot!! This is great!

    We went to Marlana's "Viewing" tonight and funeral tomorrow. Then we also went out to celebrate life with Mexican food, and we even split a dessert.

    Celebrate the moment!!!  

  • bettysgirl
    bettysgirl Member Posts: 645
    edited February 2010
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    Colleen!!! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!

    Do a little dance with NED and have a great weekend. !!!!!

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited February 2010
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    Hi Girls,

    Colleen, Fantastic News, always good to hear that our friends are doing well!

    Have a great weekend.

    Spring, hope all goes well for the funeral :(

    Love Singapore Chris x

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited February 2010
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    Hi all....

    FANTASTIC news Colleen!  That is the best feeling in the world.....or one of them anyway.

    I got the results of my tumor marker and it was 16....my other bloodwork was good too.  Made me feel a little better about this lump although I know it isn't foolproof.  My bones are still hurting so bad without pain pills.  The pain pills only dull the pain and make me sleepy.  I'm so exhausted from hurting all the time.  Not sleeping well and dealing with the pain is about to get the best of me mentally and physically.

    Hugs Beverly.....hope things went ok at the funeral today.

    love you ladies

  • Juli50
    Juli50 Member Posts: 652
    edited February 2010
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    Colleen - Congrats!!! Doin' the happy dance for you!

     Genia - I sure hope you find something soon to take that pain away! So unfair!

    I just spent the last 2 days with my bff who came out from Montana to adopt her foster son, Luke. They moved there last summer, but the adoption had to be here. She has 5 kids now, a boy and girl (16 & 12) from a previous marriage, a 15 yr old step-son who lives in Calif with his mom, and 2 adopted foster kids, Luke, 23 months old, and Lauren, 9 months older than Luke. Both adopted kids had drug-addicted mothers. Luke has a feeding tube in his stomach. My friend is a saint. And now she is back in Montana. Cry

    Hugs to everyone Kiss

  • bar62
    bar62 Member Posts: 221
    edited February 2010
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    Colleen. Fantastic  test results!

    Genia I wish you could have some pain relief for just a moment...

    (((((((Beverly)))))) 

    love you all,

    Mina 

    OTTT 

    The best thing, if there is a best  thing, about having  a  slow moving GI virus, is  getting up and watching  an hour of Fashion Week on my telly at 4AM. A new hot designer (they say) is...Ralph Rucci...he makes beautiful clothes, some with Asian themes and they are gorgeous.

    I don't care what is said by Anyone about  a model's weight, when I see models on the street and on TV during Fashion Week,  and they are beautiful  and size -00 I know thin is going to be in for a long long time. Since they  are forced to be thin  for runway modeling,  I hope they make enough money to retire  well. 

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited March 2010
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    Thinking of you Spring, hope all went well at the weekend.

    Singapore Chris x

  • Juli50
    Juli50 Member Posts: 652
    edited March 2010
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    Genia - Glad your tumor marker is 16. Mine is always around 29-30. I guess that is my normal.

    I called to postpone my onc check-up for Friday, and they gave me the following Friday. Darn! I was hoping she was more booked up than that! LOL

    Happy March to all!

    hugs Kiss

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited March 2010
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    Hi All, Viewing and funeral and DH's birthday this weekend. Emotional ups and downs! Thanks for thinking of me.

    Genia, are you seeing the doc this week?

    This is a great thing you all should watch! This guy is great and so easy to understand. Things you can do other than the standard medical treatments we've all done to remain cancer free.

    http://www3.mdanderson.org/streams/FullVideoPlayer.cfm?xml=integrativeMed/config/Anticancer_cfg 

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited March 2010
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    Yes I saw the Dr. today Spring.  I have to get a core needle biopsy done on Thurs morning.  Since my last one was such a disaster and hurt so bad.....I'm really dreading this one.  He says he won't speculate as to what it is.  It could be fat necrosis....or he said it could be a recurrence.  I have to have a mammogram tomorrow, see my Onco Weds....then the biopsy Thursday.  Needless to say I had a meltdown coming home from my Surgeons office.  This just brings back too many memories, and I'm terrified!  I'm trying really hard to not jump to any conclusions but my gut is telling me this ain't good.

    Still hurting so badly with the bone and joint pain.  I cry at times just longing for my old life back.....

    love you ladies so much

  • BrandonMom
    BrandonMom Member Posts: 209
    edited March 2010
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    Genia, when you were originally diagnosed, you couldn't feel a lump, could you?  I remember you having mammograms and nothing showing up, so I'm thinking you never felt a lump before.  If so, then this lump is different than BC for you.  A good thing, I would hope.

    I had my mammogram today.  All was good, so I'm hoping the same for you as well.

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited March 2010
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    Yes Colleen....I could feel it.  It was 7cms so  it was very large.  But it still didn't show up on the mammogram....only presented itself as a shadow.  Then they did an ultrasound and found it on there.  I guess ILC is hard to see on a mammogram.

    Glad you are NED.....that's great news Colleen 

  • SingaporeChris
    SingaporeChris Member Posts: 460
    edited March 2010
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    Oh Genia, I feel for you, the sooner this week is over the better. Like Colleen said, it does seem different this time, so lets keep our fingers and everything else crossed. Just remember we are here for you, so make sure you post every time you feel like it. Apart from liking each other and having a special bond, this is why we are here and I know if I was you, having  our group at a time like this would help me so much. Try to feel the positive vibes we are all sending and you WILL get through this.

    Colleen, excellent news about your mammogram.  A friend of mine you had cancer 4 years ago also got a clear mamo today. Hurray for all clear scans.

    Take Care Girls, Singapore Chris x

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited March 2010
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    Mine was large too Genia, and also not seen on mamo, or ultrasound, it was like a gray line, very "murky" they said! 

    My sister in law had a recurrence in the area she had a lumpectomy. There ws something about this I didn't understand though. Apparently her margins were not clear, and they assumed chemo and rads would get it. (I never heard of that before, I thought they always wanted clear surgical margins). So anyway - today, she is having bilateral mastectomy in Boston area. I keep thinking about her. Genia, they told her no chemo and she can't be radiated again. Not sure if this helps, but if it is the C, they'll just remove it and you're done, it seems. (???) And you had mastectomy, so no breast tissue (very very microscopic if any) should be left. 

    But, it could just be so many things, scar tissue, fat necrosis (this is what I had). I am still hoping for the best for you girl.

    I am wanting you to be diagnosed for this friggin body pain! I think chemo and rads have thrown you into the Fibermyalga. That's what I think. (Right. Dr. Spring! ha!)

    I agree with Chris, post post post. We are here and listening for your heart!!!!  

  • bar62
    bar62 Member Posts: 221
    edited March 2010
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    Genia, You're in my  thoughts and prayers always...love you girl.

    I had no idea there was a point where Chemo will not be given...but what do we know anyway until we have to.

    soft warm hugs,

    Mina 

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited March 2010
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    He told me IF this is cancer....there would be more chemo.  Because it would mean there was more cancer cells throughout my body and the only way to get them is with chemo.  So I don't know.....but my Onco would be the one making that call.......not the surgeon.

    My husband and I have been arguing all day.  He is scared.....and apparently when men get scared......they become mouthy and bitchy.  Or at least he is right now.  He says I have given up and don't want to fight anymore.  And if this is cancer I HAVE to keep fighting or I will die.  It's not that I have given up.......I HURT.  It hurts to move........how do you fight when every movement feels like something is breaking inside your body.  

    I hate being this way......

  • Juli50
    Juli50 Member Posts: 652
    edited March 2010
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    Genia - I am so sorry you are hurting so much. Do you have an appt with the rheumatologist yet? Big gentle hugs! love you!

    Kiss

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited March 2010
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    Juli....I see my Rhemy on the 25th.  That's the soonest they could get me in.  But with all this other stuff I have goin....not sure I could handle one more Dr right now.  Even tho that Dr. would prob be the one that would help me the most......as far as feeling better.

    Thanks you guys.....don't know what I would do without you all.

    much love

  • Springtime
    Springtime Member Posts: 3,372
    edited March 2010
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    Genia, sorry but this CRACKED me UP: "...and apparently when men get scared......they become mouthy and bitchy." LOL!!

    I know you are not feeling good, AT ALL, but can you call the Rhemy Dr office back, and get on the waiting list for a cancellation? I have done this prior. Call back, be very nice, explain how desperate you are, and I have often gotten great results.  Just a thought. I agree. This is the one you need to see. 

    Today is Wednesday, the biopsy is tomorrow, right? Then there is the waiting. UGH. We're right there with you girl.... I am thinking and praying for you.

    Beverly

  • Genia
    Genia Member Posts: 1,055
    edited March 2010
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    Yes the biopsy is tomorrow.  Last time I wouldn't numb......I hope and pray that is not an issue this time.  I could feel every nip of tissue they took.  Not pleasant to say the least!!!

    I ordered some Curcumin today Bev.  I read the reviews and it sounds like a wonderful product, not only to help with cancer cells but for inflammation from arthritis and joint pain.  I'm hoping this is my magic bullet for the pain.  Sure won't hurt......that's for sure.

    I have a hard time being on a cancellation list Beverly.  The schedule that I have with my kids....with me having them half the week and their dad having them the other half limits my Dr appts because they have to be picked up from the bus stop.  The oldest can walk home from the bus stop but the youngest can't.   I try to plan my appts around them being here, so that way I won't have to worry about getting them.  

    Going to see my Onco today at 1:30.  Haven't seen him before....he's new.  I'm anxious to see what he says about the lump and the bone pain.  Will report in later......

    love ya'll

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