Stop Smoking Support Thread
Comments
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Oh gee Bosum, what a bummer. When I had suspicious spots, I had an ultrasound and they went ahead with an ultrasound biopsy right then. Maybe an option? How do any of us trust any docs anymore since our bodies betrayed us in the past?
Reading a Sheriff Walt Longmire book by Craig Johnson set in Wyoming. Ran across this great quote: "... (I) remembered one of my late wife's slogans about smoking: 'Cigarettes are killers that travel in packs.'"
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Bosum, I agree with MT. Get the ultrasound ... worth peace of mind. MT, love the slogan about smoking!
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Bosom , I just had a lump looked at as well. and they just said most likely scar tissue .. and repeat 6 months too.. ya know the waiting and the BS kills me more than anything ... xxooxoxoxoxo
All the crazy stories about smoking huh.. I remember i was in hospital waiting the birth of my second child and hs dad was arguing with me and so i said great now u made me pee the bed .. then i went to bathroom and said take me down to smoking room for a cig .. and i came back and called nurse saying i could not stop peeing the bed .. she said it was my water that broke and yelled at me for smoking 2 hours later had a baby .. xoxoxo
Lisamarie
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My OB told me that it wasn't a good time to quit smoking when I was pregnant. And of course nothing was said about alcohol. Mind you, this was 1970.
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Good Morning beautiful ladies! So glad that you checked in Lisamarie! You are so strong and I am so proud of you.
The smoking stories made me LOL. We could smoke anywhere years ago!! In High school we had a "Senior Lav" (bathroom) that only seniors could go in and we pulled out the stalls, laid cushions over the commodes and used it as a sofa. The billowing smoke in the hallway was incredible! But, teachers did not come in there..they let us have that one space. Yikes!! We even smoked on the school bus! The driver would ignore us smoking in the back..LOL
Ok, enough about the evil cancer causing, expensive, stupid, awful cigs! (did I convince myself after waxing poetic above about the good old days??? LOL) gotta run cause working and busy today!
Love you all. Keep on keepin on. For today, I am smoke free! xoxox
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Ah April - how is DH doing? And between work & care giver duties - are you getting any time for YOU?
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Bosum - so I think that's good news on the MRI? Or at least NED for now? No surprises about the smoking facts. It's a good thing you've already almost decided to quit. Your turn will come soon.
April - how is DH doing?
LisaMarie - are you still w/your cousin?
I went to my 3rd water aerobics class today. Really do need the exercise but I do have some sore muscles that are not used to movement.
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Hello ladies! So I've been thinking that I want a smoke but the other day I was at the bank and the lady ahead of me stunk of cigarette smoke. In my mind I thought "lady do you have to smoke". I've come a long way baby because if anyone thought like I did, I would have said to them "bite me". Really, the cigarette smoke was unbearable in a small enclosure.
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Judi - aren't our reactions interesting. I went to my favorite local (bar) a couple of years after I quit smoking. It was always a fun place with dart tournaments & shuffleboard & a pool table and I used to stop every night after work the times I was working in that part of the city just to let the traffic die down. You can no longer smoke inside but there's a small deck out back in an alley. Talk about feeling 2nd class smoking next to the dumpster while you're paying for drinks!!! Anyway, the years & years of 90% of the patrons smoking inside 99% of the time was really evident. I almost choked.
I'm still friends with the bartender who only works 4 night a week now. She is just finishing her own BC treatment except for the continuing ER/PR drugs & she managed to switch to e-cigs for the duration of her tx. She's back smoking again and worried about eventual reconstruction since she had to have one of the TEs removed with thin skin and wounds not healing. Of course her husband never quit. And I think it would be hell to try to quit if you worked in a bar. She wanted me to meet her last Friday at one of the other locals, but these girls don't meet until after 9pm and by 10pm I like to be in my jammies with a good book. OK - maybe a Tia Maria or an Amaretto on the table, but definitely down time.
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MT, your story rings so true for all of us. Here in Canada they are airing a new commercial of a woman (age probably 40's, 50" and she is dying from cancer. They don't say what kind of cancer but I think throat/lung cancer as she is talking through a machine. The ad starts out where they show her as a youngster and she journey into smoking - when she first started, in high school, as a cheer leader, young woman and then now. The message is so powerful. So when I read your post, I wondered if your friend got cancer from all the smoke in the bar. A few years back, a Ontarian woman died of 2nd had smoke from working in a smoky diner and her family won a lot suit against the restaurant. Really, I always wondered what we have really done to our bodies. I'm with you by the bed time - just said to my dh that I never used to go to bed at this time or be so tired. He told me it's because we are old. God, I hate to see what I look like when I'm 80 - I'll be asleep in my chair all day!
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Hi Ladies , I love the thought that everyone thinks I am so strong but deeep down I am a wimp and not so strong .. My cousins house was driving me crazy ..... i got bit by one of her dogs and there are so many of them I cant sleep .. all the barking and chaos . I honestly have no friggin clue how I do not become unglued and start smoking or drinking again for that matter as my stress levels are at a all time High ... So he begged and cried and pleaded that I am his everything and blah blah blah .. and he promised to get help .. I know damm well I should not be here right now but I am .. I do not know what its gonna take .. I guess I will never learn ...
I am glad that you are ok Bosom ... makes me so happy ..
April how is the DH ?
About smoking again judi and minus .. I cannot take the smell of it .. its insane when I am by someone who has smoked they smell all musty and gross and then I say omg I smelled like that once .. anyway .. i still like to get w wiff of a cigarette that is being smoked .. crazy huh ... but I refuse to go back to that side of life . I am on a new journey here even tough my life is taking me in circles .. ugh
Now does anyone know if you are unhappy with the recon if you can look for another surgeon and get the recon done over ? especially with state funded insurance ? I am on a managed care plan now through medicaid of NY .. just a thought..
Lots of Love to you all ... My granddaugter graduated pre school last night I cried .. She was given the award of Mayor of the class ..lol I am so proud of her ...
Hope everyone has a great week . I miss you all so much ..
Amazed at myself that I have not smoked "Just for today I choose not to smoke or drink "
xoxoxxo
Lisamarie
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Change is so very hard whether it is changing from being a smoker to being a former smoker, or from being in a relationship to ending it. We are so hard on ourselves as we go through the process of change. People on the outside think that we should just stop smoking and don't understand why that isn't possible (yet). People on the outside of a relationship can tell you what they think you should do and don't understand why that isn't possible (yet).
This is from my next book for healthcare professionals discussing "change": Just substitute boyfriend for cigarette and relationship for smoking:
Understanding Change
To help a smoker quit means that you need to understand the process of change. quitting smoking can be one of the largest changes a person can make in their life.
There are three phases to any change in life: an ending of the old, a transition period and a new beginning. Quitting smoking is like going through a divorce. Before a marriage ends, there is turmoil trying to to make the decision of whether to stay and try to make the marriage work or to end it. There is ambivalence. After the divorce, a person goes through transition. For someone married for many years, it may feel odd to be single, not knowing how to date, not knowing how to meet someone and before a new relationship can begin, the old one must be completely over.
It is the same thing with quitting - it is the end of a love relationship. Smoker love their cigarettes but as smoking presents a problem(s) in the smokers life, the smoker starts to think that maybe that relationship needs to end. There is ambivalence about whether they should quit or not. On the one hand they love to smoke, there are so many benefits yet, there are problems also. Once the decision has been made to quit, there is still a period where it is easy to fall back in love with a cigarette. In the transition period, a smoker must learn how to learn to live every aspect of their life without a cigarette. Finally the new beginning is as a former smoker. the benefits of being smoke-free are now evident and the smoker wonders what took them so long to finally make the change.
Most of us like the status quo, we don't like a lot of change yet with life change is constant and the status quo is temporary.We want to keep a status quo but we live in change. Change is all around us every day.
Change can evoke many different emotions. The feelings that come up during change is anxiety, stress, nervousness, maybe excitement and a sense of hope. Some emotions are positive but most are negative because change means diving into the unknown. Change is an external situation while transition is the internal psychological process of adaptation.
The smoker must learn to deal with the end of their relationship with cigarettes, learn to deal with the grieving and loss during the transition period and deal with a new beginning as a former smoker.
But before you can move forward in a new beginning, you have to let go of the old. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross gave us the Five Stages of Dying which are the same stages someone goes through of any loss: denial, bargaining, anger, depression, and finally acceptance. A smoker may feel many of the same emotions in their transition from dedicated smoker to former smoker.
During the transition there can be dangers as well as opportunities.
Dangers: decreased motivation, self-doubt where they can make it, energy is drained, uncertainty, begin overwhelmed, confusion, anxiety, control is sought but chaos abounds.
Opportunities: a time to be creative and reframe issues from a negative into something positive.
The psychological transition is when new values and attitudes are formed. The new beginning can bring a sense of purpose and identity. For true change there must be an emotional commitment. They are clear on their purpose. For success, the smoker must see and feel what it will be like to be a former smoker, lay out a action plan to create certainty that they will know what to do as a non-smoker.
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Wow - VJ. Thanks for posting. So true. I loved my cigarettes and my smoking life. Well, maybe not standing in the rain or snow just to get a puff. And maybe not the expense. And maybe not the way my house & clothes smelled. Oh well, there's a long list of negatives if we get started isn't there. BTW, hope you're still having fun with the 'new' BF.
LisaMarie - We're on your side ALWAYS. We might worry, but no judgements from any of us since we're not in your shoes. Neat about your DGD's "mayor" award. I hope you're able to see them lots. Kiddos give unconditional love at that age.
RE: Recon - I'm pretty sure you can get revisions to fix problems - even for cosmetic reasons - but don't know about NY medicaid. It might be worth going to another surgeon for a 2nd opinion on what you're thinking anyway. Maybe someone else here knows? If you want a new doc, Whippetmom on the Breast Recon 101 thread keeps a list of recommended docs for the whole country. You could send her a PM and ask for a name in your area. I'd guess she knows the answer about revision & the law also.
April - thinking about you and hope your not being run ragged. How's your DH? Are you taking time for you?
Judi - OLD??? I refuse to cop to that label. Seasoned, maybe. Experienced - oops, better not go there. Certainly well wrinkled with my fair skin and all those years of smoking.
Bosum - hope all is OK. Check in when you can. No guilt given here.
Of all the silly triggers, weird that I think about smoking after slicing & chopping & sauteing & boiling & spending time preparing major meals.
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Lisamarie, you are not weak, you are between a rock and a hard place. I respect that immensely since I have been there. I stayed with my ex way past the expiration date on that relationship as most women can say they have in relationships that are toxic for us. Sometimes, we just have no darn choice.
Husband is doing well with one exception...his freaking anemia. His numbers are tanking again and they have no clue as to why. We are really frustrated. He feels fine..but his Hemoglobin/Hematocrit should be 14-18 and over 30 but he is at 8.9 and I forget the other number. He was over 10 when he left the hospital after two transfusions. Ugh! When will they figure this out???
I had my 6 month appt. with my MO today and she has me on a break from Aromasin. She saw how bad it has gotten for me and told me to stop taking it for at least 3 months! Music to my ears...She gave me a month off about 14 months ago and it was heaven. This time, she is giving me 3 whole months! She said the break is necessary to clear it out and find out what is really going on with my joints. I almost kissed her! LOL She said if I recur within those 3 months, that means it was never working in the first place which makes sense.
Anyway, love you all and have to run cause am at work. xoxo BBL!
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Bosum - hope you are doing OK & just taking a break from our nagging.
On that note, from the Women's Health column - Quitting Time by Sonya Collins in the Web MD magazine: Congratulations! You've decided to quit smoking. But how? The answer ultimately depends on why you smoke. Women's cigarette cravings are often more about external triggers than nicotine. "Men smoke more for the effect of nicotine. Women smoke more to regulate mood & stress," ....So a good quitting strategy includes more than nicotine replacement....If you've decided to quit on Monday, spend the weekend cleaning. Shampoo carpets, upholstery, and drapes. Clean your car's interior. Dry clean your winter coat. Then resolve to never let smoke get in those places again. (BTW - this worked for me)...Creating new routines also helps. Studies show that triggers - such as having coffee or finishing a meal - are especially tempting for women. So enjoy your morning coffee in a cafe or at the office where you can't smoke. Finish a meal with gum or sugar-free candy. You'll still have cravings... Be prepared. Keep your purse stocked with sugar-free gum, a bottle of water, and something to keep your hands busy, like knitting or a deck of cards.
There's more to the article. Anyone interested can likely find on line, since WebMD is a good site. Isn't that a mental picture - all of us sitting around shuffling cards!!!
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Oh Judi I forgot to say bon-voyage before you left for your trip. Hope you have a great time. We'll miss you if you don't have internet access, and see you back in July.
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Bosum - Sorry to hear about your friend's sister. Hugs.
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Bosom , so sorry for your Loss .. and yes BC Sucks ... hang in there girl ..Lots of Love and Big Hugs ..
Judi .. sorry I missed you I hope you have an amazing trip xoxox
Minus ... My garden is so beautiful , I harvested some spinach and arugula .. excited ...
Just for today I have not smoked or drank so I am feeling pretty darn good .. I think I am almost at the 8 month ,mark that is an amazing thing I never thought I could do
xoxoxoxo
Lisamarie
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LisaMarie !!!!!!!!! Fantastic girl. Congrats.
Bosum - remember when LisaMarie was where you are now?
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Well ladies, my "lucky streak" continues. This morning at 5:45 am the phone rang and when caller I D showed the nursing home number for my dad, I knew it was not good. He was in great spirits yesterday and even went to the ice cream social and ate ice cream but today, he spiked a temp over 106!!! He passed away with all of us there this afternoon. I am so sad cause I am a Daddy's girl. Anyway, will be busy with arrangements for the next few days so wanted to let you know.0 -
Oh April, I am so sorry to hear about your Dad. I'm sending hugs and I'll keep you in my thoughts. Keep in touch when you can.
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That just SUCKS BosumBlues. Waiting for more tests results is the worst and it's hard not to get stressed out. Hoping that this is a fluke and all is well. VJ
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Oh Bosum. Sorry to hear of your new worries. But I totally agree w/your decision to switch MOs. Glad your new one is thorough and hopefully just being extra careful. I go to see my new MO tomorrow. My old faithful retired in December. So far I've seen the new one once for less than 5 minutes just to meet & greet. I have a lot of questions.
I hate legal stuff but I've been getting ready to update my will and POA, etc. Should my son pre-decease me, my named executor is my BFF who died in 2005. Ooops.
Glad the state came through for you even though the idiot ex somehow escaped any responsibility.
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Bosum - obnoxious is OK. We've all been angry. You're going through lots of stuff and you can always vent here.
LisaMarie - so......are you in counseling with the BF? you can tell me to STFU if you want, just thinking about you.
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OK - smoker and ex smoker ladies. I had my first batch of tumor markers run, and my CAE was 6.5. Normal range is 0-4.0, but I have seen that it is higher in smokers. I left a message for my MO, only to be called back by his office to be told, they had an emergency and were just checking the nurse line, and he is gone for the weekend, please call back on Monday... BTW I'm on Herceptin, so my last infusion is in 3 weeks, and he is moving and that is his last day, so that might be why he ran the markers. Not really sure as they have never been done before. What numbers have you guys had and what actions were taken if elevated and what outcomes? BTW - blood was taken through my port, so not an issue with maybe missing some little cells, as you might when they use the pediatric needle. hummm.... wonder if there is a study on the numbers on a needle draw and on a port draw?
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knm - First the port - I can't imagine you would get a different reading w/a needle. I always have everything done through my port. Thank heavens for that wonderful device.
Second - the numbers. All cancer antigen tests are ONLY indications and not diagnosis of cancer or recurrence. The numbers vary too widely to be anything but a notation in your file - even if you have the test done every 3-6 months as I did. I assume if the numbers continued to go up they might do some scans, but my new MO doesn't even like to order the test due to the anxiety it cause that he feels has no basis.
Third - I did some research about CEA (see link below) & it looks like it's usually given for colon cancer, but I couldn't find a recommended number on 3 different sites. I did note that the level would be elevated for smokers. The usual breast cancer antigen test is CA-27-29. The standard range is less than 38.0. My numbers over 4 years have run up & down from 22.6 to 31.6 - one time up - the next time down. I did ask my MO last Thursday about getting a CA-15 test, but he said that was the pre-cursor of 27-29 and even less reliable. This doc is supposedly a HER2+ BC expert.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carcinoembryonic_ant...
I'm guessing maybe your doc did this test for a baseline? My baseline was before any chemo or surgery or radiation so I've had several years to watch the numbers. Do you ever post on the Middies thread (40-60)? The founder of that thread had had colon cancer so could probably give you much more info about the CEA test. If you want, I'll send the link.
Sorry for going on so long. I'd love someone to show me that I'm wrong. I'm so grateful that smoking doesn't directly impact breast cancer. I hope you'll find this is just a baseline and that it doesn't really indicate anything. Let us know.
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thanks MinusTwo
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Hi all you non-smokers, former smokers, people still trying to quit, people not ready to quit yet. Thinking of you & missing Judi too.
Our neighborhood pool is sponsoring water aerobics again this summer so 3 times a week I go torture my poor body. I don't have an 'idle speed' so it's very difficult for me not to push hard through the exercises. Even so, I can tell how badly out of shape I have gotten by how sore I am the next day. LOL.
Hmmm - another stop smoking tip? It's pretty hard to smoke in the pool. Yes, I spent some hot summers hanging out at the side with a cigarette & a drink, but that won't work if you're actually moving back & forth in the water.
Hope everyone has a great weekend.
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Stopping by to say hello. I made three years smoke free June 10, minus 1 day when my Mom died. Couldn't have EVER done it without this thread and my binky :-)
You are all so special to me. For all that are trying, don't give up....you will make it.
Hugs and more hugs!!! Xoxo
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