Stop Smoking Support Thread
Comments
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Minus , I do have a pug and 2 kittens now god help me ... it does get very dusty here in the dessert .. I have always been one to clean .. its a pain in the ass. anyway you make me laugh so much xoxoxo
lisamarie
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Hello friends, I started my rads this week. 2 down 32 to go. Still using my ecigs. Amazed it's been 4 months on the 21st since I had a real smoke. Seems like I just quit yesterday. Still have my stale pack in my old smoking spot with the "Not today Satan" sticky note on it. Today, I am hanging out on the couch watching Halloween movies. Hocus Pocus is just coming on now. I love that one. The fall colors are coming on here in Michigan, such a beautiful time of year. DH is going to the Michigan vs Wisconsin game tonight. Go Blue.
Glad to see you are recovering from your surgery Lisamarie.
Carol Annie
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CaroleAnnie - GREAT news that it's been 4 months since you last smoke. I'll celebrate 4 hours, 4 days, 4 weeks - but 4 months is a good milestone. Do you have the ecigs that you can gradually dial down the nicotine?
Also good to hear that you've moved along into rads. My worst SE from rads was constant fatigue, so treat yourself gently & nap when you can. Anybody remember new motherhood? Everyone told me to nap when the baby did. I didn't believe I'd need to, and what a mistake that was.
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LisaMarie - I lived in Albuquerque for 7 years so I remember that there is no control over the dust moving inside - sifting around window sills, sneaking in under doorways. Eeek. And I also remember the tumbleweeds. Fun that you have pets.
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Thank you MinusTwo on the celebrating! I agree with you on any amount of time you can stave off smoking is worth celebrating. I am proud of myself. I went through a rough patch a few weeks ago where I wasn't sure I was going to hang in there but I made it. My ecigs are the lowest I could find at 1.8 mg nicotine and I also have a couple different flavors that are 0 nicotine. Once I get through the rads, I plan to wean myself off them. Perhaps for new years. I am looking forward to 2019 and putting 2018 to rest. My daughter and grandbaby just left it's 9:19 pm and it feels like past midnight to me. Not sure if its the rads or what but I am pooped. Since June I have been taking Ativan for sleeping. It stopped working so I either needed to up the dose or get off from it. I got off from it. So I haven't been sleeping as well but it's getting better every night. I am surely hoping that fatigue is the worst SE that I have. Thank you for reminding me to give myself a break, it is something that I am working on. I already told my boss if I can't wear a bra I am not coming to work. : )
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caroleann .. good job with the smokes ... i never had rads so I cannot understand how you feel , I do know that i am more fatigued after the hysterectomy then ever .. and sleeping comes so hard for me as well. The doc just gave me lunesta but it only puts me to sleep don't keep me asleep ... I hope hings get better . I too love this time of year , although no colors here in Vegas (i miss) but the Halloween movies I love so much ... xoxoxo try to rest when u can ... (i know easier said than done )
Minus ... yes the dust lol... iv'e learned not to push myself so much ... I am again ever so grateful to be here and a part of this amazing group... and have you as my dear friend .. do you know I am on another board called hystersisters and they ask for money to keep the site going .. I was kind of shocked. anyway hugs my dear ..
hope everyone is doing well I miss you all so much
xoxoxoxo
Lisamarie
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Lisamarie, I was also very tired after my hysto. It took several months before I felt good again. I think it has much to do with hormones even though I hadn't had a period in a year or so. It's a lot for your body to adjust to and takes time to get your system back to a good stable place. I still have night sweats but not nearly as bad now. Hystersisters is a great board for learning about recovering from a hysterectomy. I remember being so scared that I would tear something when going to the bathroom. Hang in there girl you will start to feel better soon. My doctors office recommended Benadryl to replace the Ativan for sleeping. I have used it a couple of times and it works pretty well.
MinusTwo, I was thinking about you last night. Your presence here is a blessing. Thank you.
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I'd like to encourage all of you who are stopping smoking. My husband I and both quit almost 30 years ago and we will still ocassionally discuss how it was one of thee very best things we ever did. This was long before the internet. I remember sending away for helpful pamphlets from the American Lung Association that gave me great tips. One was to always keep a pen and paper nearby to doodle with while talking on the phone. Another tip was to wear loose rubber bands around the wrist to have something to fidget with. I got a jar and filled it with hard candy and reached for a piece instead of a smoke.
Sometimes when you're around others who smoke, they will try to get you to start back up. Don't fall for it!
My husband would stop and start, stop and start again. He'd stop when things were calm, the start when stress came up, like trouble with his ex and seeing their son, or job layoffs, ect. He was discussing this frustration with me once and I said, “you're always going to be dealing with some kind of stress in life. You'll never be able to completely be rid of stress. What you need to do is find a better way to deal with it rather than turn to cigarettes." For whatever reason, this made complete sense to him, like a light switch got turned on. He eventually got the prescription Wellbutrin from his doctor and weaned himself completelyfrom the habit.
It is so worth it! Keep up the good work! Do whatever it takes to quit!
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Hey MrsM - nice to see you here. Thanks for sharing your experience and the positive thoughts. It's always interesting to see how different every person is with their quit experience.
I talked to a friend last night who almost died with pneumonia because she didn't want to go to the doc & be lectured about smoking. She literally couldn't smoke while trying to recover with O2, etc. She said she honestly was scared when she was gasping and couldn't catch a breath & decided she was afraid of dying - so she's quit. Fast forward 4 weeks, she tells me she leaves her smokes on the cupboard and has one or two every evening. She doesn't like them and she says she doesn't need them. She has quit, but one or two don't count.. I suggested she put the pack in the freezer, but she said it's no problem for her. Hmmmm. Been there, done that. Hope it works for her, but as a 40 year smoker I think she is playing mind games with herself.
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Hi.. Having a smoking set back due to a death in the family, the step father in law. My mother in law has dementia and shouldn't be left alone for very long. I am married into a VERY dysfunctional family. I have been helping out, as has my husband, but after his service I am limiting my helping time as I just can't do it. It will kill me. I was on a good track stepping down from my bad habits, slowly and when I reached a plateau I told myself it was OK to stay there until I was ready to step down again. A few more days. I asked for next Monday off to have the time to meditate my way back on track.
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ctm - Keeping you in my thoughts. It's so difficult to pull back when a family member (step or original) needs more care than we can reasonably provide. You are perfectly reasonable in stating your own needs. No one wants to put our relatives into 'care', but Altzheimers is a horse of a different color. I just finished re-reading 'Still Alice'. It's a vivid representation of what happens when our minds are no longer tracking. I recently had a friend who had to put her husband in care since he became combative & nasty & hitting everyone. Another friend could no longer be sure that her DH wouldn't turn the stove on & burn the house down if she ever shut her eyes for even a minute.
I don't say this often, but if they don't understand what you need - pull the cancer card to disentangle yourself. I've started a chair yoga class and I'm finding the breathing exercises & the meditation extremely valuable.
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MinusTwo - my MIL had Alzheimer’s for 10 years. She wasn’t combative but she didn’t say a word ever. She lived in the Alzheimer’s wing of the Assisted Living place where they lived. He visited her every day.
He had her tested after she started cooking in the middle of the night, couldn't finish sentences, repeated herself and couldn’t remember how to walk up the stairs. It was heartbreaking. She was a retired teacher. Her mother had Alzheimer’s so my DH and his siblings are high risk.
Diane
It’s a debilitating disease.
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Diane: Thanks for posting. Hoping we can skip that debilitating disease since we already gave at the BC 'office'.
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My MIL had it too for about 6 years. I loved her to the moon and miss her everyday. We put her in an adult foster care home. Thankfully her pension and SS covered most of it. She was still sweet even though she couldn't remember her own sons. I would do the same over again. It would have been too much for any of us to try to cope with the demands of care while your heart is breaking and your life is happening. It's a tough time for any family. It seems like there are always the one couple or person that will step up and do what has to be done while others hold back unless they are called out to help. My heart goes out to you ctmbsikia.
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Thank you everyone. My mother also had ALZ and many other health issues. My father loved her so and one day I think he had too much and had a coronary. Caregivers neglect their own health when caring for their loved ones. While my family would not have expected Dad to go first, we rallied together to care for mom. Six weeks after he passed we moved Mom to AL (assisted living)---hardest day of my life! The following 6 weeks we cleaned out the house and sold it to help pay for her care. She died the following year.
My in laws are a totally different story, I am sorry I ever got involved. I guess it's just in my make up that I care. On the flip side, I know I need to care for myself more, and limit my involvement. His memorial service is tomorrow. He was a fireman for many years, a decorated veteran, I am sure it will be quite the send off. Cry much?
Thanks again, I'll be back.. I was at my home last night and I did well, No smoking, and no drinking!
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MinusTwo, tho I don’t have any loved ones with AZ, I read Still Alice and thought it was excellent. My heart goes out to all who are caregivers to those with that disease.
Dysfunctional families: I learned years ago how to deal with my own. My 20s were a time of breaking free from the chaos and restructuring those relationships. I had to learn when to stay away, when to join, when it was time to visit, when it was time to leave.
Dh’s family is another story. They took advantage of him and placed the care of his widowed mother on him even tho he’s the youngest. For decades, I had to put up with his codependent relationship with her and lack of help from his siblings who turned a blind eye to everything. My MIL never asked of her other kids all she asked of dh. Exceedingly frustrating and damaging to our marriage. We made it thru, but trust me, I bitched up a storm especially the last 3 years since she moved across the street from us. She is now 90 and can no longer live alone so finally in June one of her daughters who literally never lifted a finger to help before took her in. Dh and I are still recovering.
Whenever MIL had a need, dh was always too quick to jump in and help. I continually asked, begged, demanded he step back and wait awhile to see if any of his siblings would step in. That’s my advice if you are dealing with dysfunctional people. Try to step back and not try to solve matters or even add your two cents worth.
For several years, dh’s sister sent him bizarre messages trying to stir up all kinds of sh*t. I told him do not respond. Ever. And he never did. Whenver she did the right things, like call and speak cordially, he would be nice. Whenever she was sh*tty, he simply did not engage. It was to teach her that bad behaviour is not rewarded but respect would get a response.
Value yourself. Value your time and energy. Don’t give in to dysfuntional people. Try to hang back and observe. Often they try to do things to push your buttons or to create drama to make themselves feel important. You don’t have to fall for their tricks.
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Leaving work today to go to rads appt, i caught myself mindlessly digging in my door compartment for my pack of smokes. Made me chuckle at myself. Not the first time. Most likely not the last. I think the rads is making me a ding dong head.
Have a great weekend everyone.
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CarolAnnie - oh boy do those habits hang on a long time. There are still occasions when I long for a cigarette - but 11 (yup eleven) years down the road I no longer reach for them.
If I counted correctly, you'll be through with rads right around Thanksgiving. Treat yourself gently. I was totally fatigued by the time I finished rads and I only had to 5 weeks. You may have to put most everything else on the back burner for now. And be sure someone else is preparing the Thanksgiving dinner.
LisaMarie - how is your Mother doing? How was her birthday celebration? Any chance that any of your kiddos can get out to see?
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Thought I would pop in for an update. I had rad treatment #14 today. So far so good. It took me a week or so to notice how thick the door is to the room where big scary is. Holy cats, that sucker has gotta be 8" thick. That realization gave me some food for thought. My skin is holding up well. A bit pink mostly around my incision. I have some itchy bumps underneath my breast which almost look like bug bites. I am going to ask about those on Thursday when I meet with RO. I notice in the afternoon around 3pm my energy level tanks so I have been trying to hydrate more during that time which seems to help. You are correct Minus, my last treatment is Nov. 29. I am almost half way now.
It's been 4 months and 8 days since I last smoked. It keeps getting easier. I am so happy I was able to put the cigs down. It is the one good thing that has happened with the breast cancer diagnosis. Its such a crazy hurdle in your mind when you first consider quitting. In reality for me at least it was not as hard as I imagined. We are so much stronger than we think we are. My hat is off to all of us here, that have quit or are tapering down or even just considering quitting.
Did I tell you guys about my double digit thing? Well last week for whatever reason my RO told me I was patient #33 on his list for the day, Imagine that. : )
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Woo Hoo CaroleAnnie. Congrats for 4 months 8 days. I see you have stopped counting just days or weeks. Isn't it great to get past that hurdle? That's fantastic. Glad to hear the rads are going OK. I used Miaderm cream as the area got more & more burned looking. Although my RO said that just plain Aquafor would be enough & I never had horrible problems, I'm glad I got that. I think I bought it at Amazon.
ctm - thinking about you & hope you are OK. Please do post - smoking or not. We don't care....
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Hey, everyone! I am still doing good on not smoking! Almost 5 months😳 I still get the urge/desire to smoke but it is a fleeting thought most days.On days when it is not, I tell myself- if tomorrow you really want one.... So far it is working. Hope everyone is doing well!
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Carol, fatigue with rads is a real thing. It builds up so take care of yourself-nap when/if you need to.
I had no idea about the fatigue til after rads were over. In fact, my daughters had scheduled for all of us to do a 5k -raising money for BC research- the day after rads to celebrate!! An uphill one to boot!!! I did 1mile, I thought I was going to die! What the h*** were they thinking or me for that matter. I would walk about 15 or 20 steps, stop to catch my breath then repeat.... At one point I looked back and there was a police car right behind (they were looking kinda worried Lol) The kids but mostly my youngest son stayed with me. I finished the mile but I felt so out of shape/ disappointed in myself. Not realizing it was the accumulative effect of the chemo and radiation! The following year we did the Bluff 5k again, I did it mostly to see how I compared to the previous one! It was a lot easier and I didn't finish last! Plus instead of a police car it was an ambulance/paramedic that brought up the rear! Lol
Any way, take care of yourself, rest when you need to. Don't schedule any 5ks Lol
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Belle - 5 months !!! Fabulous. Way to go.
As we've all discovered, something will trigger the urge or the old habit to reach for a smoke even when we're not thinking about it. I like your coping mechanism - wait & see if you really want one tomorrow. Even 11 years out (yup - eleven) there are still times that I really want a cigarette, but the urge is just a flash and it doesn't happen often. It's more like - gee it would sure be nice to have a smoke just now...
My good news last week from pulmonologist is even though I smoked 1-2 packs a day for 40 years, my lungs have mostly recovered. He had ordered both a CT and a breathing test in the glass box. I do have mild COPD, but he said it's so borderline he has to record it with a minus sign. (hmmm, another meaning for my nom de plume - LOL) Fortunately I have no symptoms but he told me to call him if I get a dry cough that doesn't go away in a week and he'll order a short term inhaler.
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Great news, Minus! Congrats on the good report and 11 years!
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That is great news Minus.
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It is certainly proof - at least with me - that your lungs will repair themselves (or try to) once you quit smoking for good. I wish the same for all of you.
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Yay Minus! A good report at the doctor is worthy of a celebration! Such wonderful news that your lungs have repaired themselves. Your a poster child for quitting, such an inspiration. Hoping that mine will do the same. I am enjoying my new found sense of smell. Wow, there were so many smells that I missed over most of my life. Some good some not so good. lol
My radiated breast is itching like crazy. I hope my skin holds up. Half way through now only 17 more to go, 6 of which are boosts.
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Minus, thank you for sharing this. I'm in the have to quit for surgery stage, so it's helpful to hear such success. Congratulations!!
CarolAnnie, good luck with the rest of your rads. Hope all goes well for you ☺️
Vickki
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Vslush, thank you! Keep us posted on how you are doing with quitting and with your surgery. Even tho my MO tells me good job quitting smoking cigs, he wants me to pick a quit date for my ecig. It's like my pacifier and I am not quite ready to give it up. However, I do plan on doing that after the holidays when I am done with treatments and the holiday stresses.
Carol
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Vslush - sorry you have to be here but welcome. There are so many tips in the previous pages and a bunch of us hung together until we got it done. You may not see many posts, but there are quite a few people who have this thread on their favorites and will check in if you have specific questions. Feel free to rant, rave, or just share your journey (s).
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