Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
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I like that quote, Betrayal. It spoke to me.
Petite, we stayed at a nice RV park in Murphy, NC, many years ago.
The morning is starting off dreary, with the patter of rain on the roof, but dh is dressed for golf at 10 am. I will probably go to the gym about 10:30. By then the noisy class is over and the women have left. The parking lot isn't full of cars. I'm starting to look forward to going to the YMCA at home again and attending senior classes. Also, going to lunch on Wednesdays with our little lunch group.
Happy Wednesday to all.
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One of the first conditions of happiness is that the link between Man and Nature shall not be broken.
Leo Tolstoy3 -
ok older gals….what about breast reconstruction? There used to be a current shortage of plastics here so not getting reconstruction at time of mastectomy. My surgeon says he will refer me anywhere but wants me to heal first.
i have been reading about breast reconstruction as I think that is what I would like vs prosthesis….but… one thing I saw is they don’t really like to do a DIEP flap on women > 70 as it’s such a long surgery and they usually don’t recover as well. I am 74. I have pretty good mobility but I am not an exercise person.
I have been reading that people whether they do flap or have silicone implants have multiple surgeries, many are still not happy with them. I am in a quandary.4 -
jaspercat,
I had lumpectomy (L) breast February 2010. Age 60.
Last TNBC treatment March 2011.
I hide big (R) breast behind clothing or purse. Age 77.
I went through enough misery. 😜
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@jaspercat - this is such a personal decision I’m not sure that any of us can advise. I would check with your insurance regarding coverage.
Have you already had a mastectomy? If so, then I presume Medicare (are you in the U.S.?) has approved this as medically necessary. Is this a unilateral or bilateral mastectomy? I believe Medicare as a rule that reconstruction must be covered.
Best wishes.
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Chris - yes, triple positive. Ten years cancer free in Dec. I too take venaflexine and also kappra for post surgical brain seizures.
Took Ken to ER Friday night - retired doc, he diagnosed himself with a bowel obstruction. Fortunately the NG tube and barium worked so no surgery. He came home Sun. afternoon but says he feels very weak and his breathing is bad. Still insists on walking the dogs but it is a struggle for him.
Sounds like another great trip, Betrayal.
Sending hugs to all who need them.
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Just living is not enough... one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.
Hans Christian Andersen5 -
Jaspercat, the surgery to change implants is quick and easy. I had mastectomy and temporary magic expanding implant at the same time. Then had the "permanent" implant. Lost thirty pounds and had a water balloon hanging off my chest. Had an exchange. I have lost twenty pounds since then. Hopefully I will hit equilibrium soon, so I won't need another exchange. Very quick and easy. But remember that it is better for the back and neck if the breasts (or absence thereof) weigh similarly.
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jaspercat, I agree with Harley. I had a lumpectomy so I can’t weigh in with any pros or cons.
I took a 2+ mile walk with a gf this morning. It felt like we were walking in a swamp. Humidity was high from rains last night.
I went to Lowe’s for 2 bags of mulch and the associate ringing my items said they’re not on sale, it ended yesterday. But I had no plans of weeding the area so when it was on sale I didn’t want any. I got the mulch put out in the gardens I had weeded and for that I’m grateful.
We were able to take the vinyl gate off today, set it up on saw horses for my cousin to repair. I can happily report he did a great job. It now opens & closes smooth as butter.
But you know me by now, there is always something that can go wrong. When we removed the hardware from the gate - handle and locking pieces, I thought they looked bad so I wanted to spray paint them. I ran inside, grabbed the spray paint and put a nice coat on the pieces. Then there was a little red tab that goes back on the spray part of the can to prevent it from spraying. I was having a hard time getting it on, so I was looking closely at it when I sprayed myself! My face, ear, neck, and chest with black high gloss paint. UGH! I swear I can’t make this stuff up. I’m lucky I didn’t get it in my eyes, or even my mouth. It all scrubbed off but boy was that a shock.
Enough for today. I’m hoping tomorrow is less “fun” with more relaxing than working.
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jaspercat, initially, I thought I would need reconstructive surgery, but didn't do it. I have small breasts and having one that is tiny didn't matter to me. I just put in an extra cup in my why even bother size bras. (that what my friend calls my bras) I am 73
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jaspercar, I think Chris raised good points about implant surgery. I think you should talk to a plastic surgeon for the pros and cons of each surgery. Not too familiar with how Canada's Healthcare system handles BC.
carole, hope the workout at the gym was satisfying. Did your DH get to play golf?
petite1, loved the photos and glad you were able to escape to the cabin.
Taco, sorry to hear Ken had to be briefly hospitalized. Glad he still wants to walk the dogs. I hope he can get back his strength. It's hard being an ill medical person because we realize what is happening, what can go wrong and recognizing that we are dependent on care givers that we hope care.
carole and three tree thank you for the comments on the quote that spoke to you. I try to find one's that are neutral, but do use ones that are from that person's birthday event.
Bought a copy of the nursing yearbook from two years ahead of my graduating class. This was my "big sister's" class. Interesting to revisit some of the names and faces I remember. Found it on ebay and wish I knew how the seller acquired it. The name of the owner is engraved in gold on the front.
I've been plugging away on the counted cross stitch project. I try not to work on it after sunset unless it is a dark thread. The ability to differentiate between white and baby blue very light is difficult. Put side by side, it's a hard call under lamp light. So daytime only for using it.
With today being the 25th anniversary of 9/11, I hope anyone who lost a loved one remembers their sacrifice, but mostly what they meant to you and to others. May they rest in peace. I remember clearly what I was doing that day and I will never forget what I saw or felt.
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In memory of those who lost their life on 9/11:
That though the radiance which was once so bright be now forever taken from my sight. Though nothing can bring back the hour of splendor in the grass, glory in the flower. We will grieve not, rather find strength in what remains behind.
William Wordsworth6 -
9/11 - I was in upstate NY getting ready to go into work. The first plane I thought might have been a tourist helicopter or similar, as I had just stayed down there for work, at a Hilton across from the towers. My room looked out on the atlas statue at ground the level of the towers.
Our new office was just around from where I stayed, but I’d take the subway up to our current office. The area was all very familiar to me. Grab discount tickets for Broadway plays at TKTS in the trade center. Shopped in the underground stores under the towers, and out at H&M. Walked the area for dinner, over to the seaport. Even went to the top of the towers as a tourist during that trip.
And then it was gone. Horrific images. Thankful I wasn’t there; sorrow and grief for those that were.There are some shows on tonight about 9/11. I texted my gf, we shared an office together through all of it, to ask if she was watching. She said she can’t, they make her cry. I said cry too but still watch.
We had employees in NYC that refused to ever go back to work there; resigned. We weren’t allowed to move into the new office until all the debris on our balcony had been cleaned out. We purchased masks for employees. We purchased air scrubbers, to clean the air in the office. We purchased sticky mats, to remove ash etc… from the soles of your shoes as you entered the offices.
May god hold them all in the palms of his hands.
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Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.
Khalil Gibran4 -
Cindy, interesting and sad recollection. You're the only person I know who has a personal connection to the 9/11 tragedy. I'm so glad the nation paid so much attention to the anniversary.
Yesterday was our final day as vendors at the 2026 Farmers Market in Park Rapids. We had good sales and are going home with one full bin and a partial bin of products. We brought up five full bins. There were vendors yesterday who are involved in sheep raising and using the wool in various ways. It was interesting to look at their booths.
Our close neighbors, Mary and Lyman, will be leaving today to go to Fargo for a couple of days. Then they will fly home to Ocala, FL, where they have a winter home. It will be strange for them to be gone. Their deck is a center of social activity.
It's 44 degrees and the heat pump and a small electric heater is warming our 5th wheel camper. Happy Sunday to all.
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Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.
Oscar Wilde2 -
carole, glad you DH was able to see so many of his wares at the weekend markets.
cindyny, your exploits do make me laugh. You remind me of myself at times when I take on a challenge and it really proves that it lives up to its name.
As far as 9/11, I was taking my usual nearly 2 mile walk around our block. I had just reached a distant part of my road when a stranger stopped his car to tell me about the plane hitting the north tower. He was upset by what he had heard on the radio and asked me if I knew anything and I had to say no. I told him I was on my way home and would turn on my TV. I got home just in time to turn on the TV to see the second plane hit the south tower.
A friend of my DD's was a flight attendant on that flight. He was the youngest of 7 children and his loss destroyed his mother. I was devastated by what I saw and work called to cancel classes that day. My cousin's husband worked there and had survived the 1993 bombing. He also survived this day because he went late for his morning break and was in line for the elevator to go back to his floor when the plane struck. His friend told him he would meet him at the coffee shop because he was also running late. He did not survive.
Yesterday was the annual street fair in my home town. We haven't been for quite awhile. Our family used to congregate after at our parent's home for a meal with each of us bringing a dish. It was always a great way to get together. It started to fizzle out after my mother moved in with my youngest brother. He sponsored it for a few years, but then Covid killed it off. The fair went on pause during those years and did resume, but we weren't able to attend. Considering this was a 250th anniversary of the nation, it was a really well attended and had loads of vendors. The town was actually founded in 1667, so it is much older. DD and DSIL accompanied us and we spent far more than we expected.
The town library was my Saturday hangout from the time I was about 8 until I graduated from high school. I loved the smell of those old books and wandering through the stacks to find this week's reading material. The elder librarian realized that by about age 10 my reading skills were beyond the Nancy Drew series, and introduced me to age appropriate books by adult authors. Yes, they existed and she would refuse to check out a book that she thought was "off limits". Initially she controlled how many books I could take weekly, but then over the summer she would relax and let me check out as many as 8 every week. It was distant from my home and carrying that many books, crossing busy roads and getting home could be a challenge at times. I loved that librarian. The library was selling off books, hardback and paper back, CD's, DVD's and old record albums. I bought 7 hardbacks and DH got 2 DVD's. We gave a donation to the library.
I bought a long oval fall wreath for the front door and DD bought a Christmas one for her house. The guy who made them was there and held them for us while we explored other vendors.
They had a produce vendor so we were able to get some Jersey cantaloupes, tomatoes, and corn. They also had huge bouquets of flowers that they were assembling on site. I bought two and DD bought one. Some of the flowers in each bouquet can be dried and I will try to do that. They are so fragrant.
I bought a shawl for the cruise and I have to remember to take some of my other ones. She provided a pin to hold the shawl and I asked if I could change out the one she displayed because it was a horse and I wasn't fond of it. I picked out a bird that resembles a phoenix and has blue rhinestones on it that reflect one of the colors in the shawl. The shawl has peacock/rainbow like colors in it.
They aways sell gingerbread squares and I bought some for us to have for dessert. I want to get some lemon curd to pour over it. They used to see it this way, but stopped many years ago. If you haven't had it, give it a try, it is delicious. DSIL bought us gingerbread men and he bought a loaf of gingerbread which is really bread like, not cake-like. He gave us 2 slices and I gave them 2 slices of the pumpkin bread, which is cake-like. I got DS 2 small yard flags: on is a buff Frenchie and the other is a black Frenchie. He has 2 buff and one black Frenchie. Bought DGD some scrunchies in colors she likes.
DD's one dog got my finger when she lunged for a treat. It's an L shaped wound on the tip of my right index finger and it kept bleeding yesterday. I got blood on my shirt, my slacks and had to be careful not to touch anything with my right hand. When we went to dinner, it started again when I was trying to cut up my entree, so DD took over. It's fine today and I have not been using it trying to give it time to seal.
Today I ran to the place I got Bumblebee to replenish my stock of canary seed. I got it and they also are a nursery so I went shopping for some perennials for the big rock bed. We are in the process of fencing it in because the deer have decimated my irises and the red Crocosomia. They left the lavender and the coral bells alone, but they have eaten them in other areas. I bought a bunch of different color cone flowers because they will naturalize. I want this area to look like an English garden. DH got some mulch to replace where he had to dig holes for the posts and now I'll have enough to recover the areas where I have to dig. Once he gets the fencing on the posts, then I'll introduce the plants.
The past 2 days have been lovely. It rained last night and early this morning. It finally stopped around 11 and the sun came out. It was mid 70's with virtually no humidity and a nice breeze.
Hope everyone had a great day and waving "hi" to everyone.
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It was 39 degrees when I got up at 7 am and turned on the heat pump and heater. That's too cold for September. The forecast calls for widespread rain and wind today. The golf cart stopped running yesterday. So, all things considered, it's doubtful dh will be able to play golf today. We'll probably go to the gym and have breakfast at our favorite diner afterwards and buy the groceries on a short list.
We both hope dh can figure out what is wrong with the golf cart and get it running. He ordered a carburetor but isn't sure the old one is the problem. He took it off and cleaned it. Didn't see anything wrong with it. Maybe we should bring Cindy in to check it out. LOL.
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The three hardest tasks in the world are neither physical feats nor intellectual achievements, but moral acts: to return love for hate, to include the excluded, and to say, 'I was wrong'.
Sydney J. Harris2 -
Carole, I can check your air filters and windshield wipers & fuses - if you have them. I can check the oil on a car, but don’t know if golf carts even have that. I know zip, zilch, noda, about motors and even less about golf carts. LOL Most of the men in my FL community work on each others if there is an issue. Google it for a YouTube video help. 🤷♀️
Saturday I took a 5 mile walk alongside the Hudson River. A gf & I were talking up a storm and just kept walking. It was great, with cooler weather and full sun. There is a nice wide paved path for pedestrians and bikes
Sunday was spent getting an ulcer while on the phone multiple times with Xfinity out of FL. The short story is neighbor gf has reset my FL modem several times, and with a day it goes back off. She exchanged it for a new one. This requires me renaming it to the same name and password of my old one - so things I had hooked up to wifi (thermostat & garage door opener) will be able to find that same name and connect. Didn’t happen. Xfinity tech at my house; everything works but it won’t let me turn on the wifi because you’re on seasonal. I am on seasonal but I pay extra to keep wifi on. Call Xfinity; yes all fixed. Still not working. Gf says modem is still blinking.
We started about 10 AM, and by 1 PM I had Xfinity just turn it off totally. Too hard to get things connected via NY to FL. I no longer have WiFi, only some basic tv channels and I don’t have to turn in equipment.Went from $53+ down to $8 plus tax. It will take me months to figure out the + or - $ to the account; it’s like health insurance, you’re billed in advance and we’re on auto pay. And I’ll have to have my neighbor check at least weekly to see that the AC is still running at 80 degrees. I used to check it daily; just hit my app on the phone. We’ll be there approx 11/7, it comes off of seasonal, and at that time I can figure it all out. This wore me out.
Today we’re packing for Texas. I’ve checked the weather, it’s laughable it’s so high! Such as 98 and feels 101. While here it’s hitting the low 70’s. We may try to bring 1 large suitcase and a carry on for meds and such. I really don’t want to pay $180 for luggage if we check 2 bags - Southwest, I gave up their credit card. We need nothing heavy, certainly not jeans or sweatshirts, lightweight summer clothes only. And multiple bathing suits. I do have gifts for the kids, and now I think I should have had them shipped directly to them. Live & learn.
I need to get this in the ground today. It needs a lot of sun, and my yard doesn’t really have a full sun spot that isn’t already taken. I shouldn’t have bought it, it was a spur of the moment purchase.
Wishing everyone a great start to the week.5 -
Lost a post…. cindy, yes it's over 100 most days in Houston, but don't forget - all buildings have A/C running like the arctic. I always have to take a sweater to a restaurant or a show.
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- Always remember to forget / The friends that proved untrue. /But never forget to remember /Those that have stuck by you. Irish proverb
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Hello to all. My niece was up for the weekend. We went to a Journey tribute in Inverness. We had a great time. The music was good and the large crowd was friendly.
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Petite, the NC cabin has been such a pleasure for you.
Tomorrow the carburetor for the golf cart is supposed to be delivered from Amazon. Fingers crossed that installing it will restore the cart to service. We miss it. The owner of the campground offered the use of his cart to dh today for playing golf. Otherwise, I would have to drop him off and pick him up, and he would have to rent a cart. Soooo much more convenient to drive to and from the course on a safe route, using a 4-wheeler/snowmobile trail. The drive takes about 5 minutes to reach a turn onto the course.
Happy Wednesday to all.
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Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.
— Laurence J. Peter
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The fencing was finished yesterday by noon. My back and neck have been bothering me for days and after taking prescribed medication, using hot pads and a soak in tub, I was able to get it quiet long enough to get new plants in. DH had picked up some extra mulch so I could mulch around each plant and the areas where he had to dig. So I planted a variety of coneflowers knowing they will naturalize, heuchera, balloon flowers and rudbeckia. These should spread as well.
The deer devoured my peonies this year so I bought more fencing today. This will be the last fence installation this year. They have also eaten the lily of the valley bed. This abuts the road, so I will just have to spray with deer away more often. Fencing here would be difficult.
I weeded the one bed by the road yet again. I think I may need an herbicide for there. Nutsedge is virtually impossible to remove just by weeding due to its root structure.
It was a lovely day in the mid-70's, with low humidity. It is warmer today, but still not humid.
DD and DSIL stopped by as I was finishing planting. They stayed for a takeout dinnerand we remembered it was their wedding anniversary. I should finish the counted cross stitch before their 15th anniversary.
It was also my deceased cousin's birthday. We were born a month and 2 days apart. She was the 4th child and I was the first. I miss her, we were tight when growing up.
Today is 3 loads of laundry and dealing with both a sore neck and back. Using heating pad and medication again. I did contact pain management yesterday and was able to get an appointment on Monday morning. I lucked out. Hopefully they will have a solution. It really knocks me out ot commission when it flares up.
I'll work on cross stitch tonight. It's slow going, but I need to keep on plugging away.
Caroke, glad DH was able to borrow a golf cart so he could go golfing.
petite1, lovely photo of you and your niece. Glad you are enjoying sights near your cabin.
Hope everyone had a great day and waving "hi" to everyone.
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Today may be my final golfing with the women's league this summer. I will need to rent a cart. I also have to remember to take the Thank You card for Linda, our leader, with cash contributions from members. The league has been enjoyable, thanks to the nice women.
It's amazing how quickly fall arrived in September.
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Time is more value than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.
Jim Rohn1
