NOLA in September?
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CCBABY - I can apply cortizone cream, but so far no relief! Two pills in me, hoping for relief tomorrow. How are you doing? Getting around ok? I sure hope so.
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Melanie...I am doing great! I have been doing just about everything just as I normally do. With the exception of not lifting over 10 lbs. I do tire out a little easier, but not too much. I stopped my pain pills 2 days ago. I feel tightness at my donor site, but it isn't too sore. I have decided to try to do stage 2 the second week of march. When will you do stage 3? Hey, do you have a Facebook page? If so, PM me!
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Hi Girls...I ended up spending my entire Christmas in the E.R!!! To make a long story short, I had an ovarian cyst burst! It was like going thru childbirth. I am basically bedridden now for a few days as the body reabsorps the fluid. It doesn't help that I am 2 weeks out of Stage 2. It could of been worse, at least it wasn't Stage 1! lol
In the big picture, God gave me the gift of reassurance.... A CLEAR CT Scan on my organs!! As a Stage 2 Warrior, my dr. doesn't normally scan unless there is a complaint....
Trish...I will call you tomorrow. I am hoping you didn't have to have your orders in by Christmas to hit your goal....I just got a bit sidetracked on the 23rd..so sorry! Yeah!! No bone tumors for Tre!! xo
My sister did a great job of hosting 20 people at my house while hubby and I were in the E.R. lol I never had cysts in my life til I was on Tamoxifen...I think its a side effect.
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Hi everyone. My Christmas was waaaaay so much better than EVER expected.
TEEL: My abd CTA showed ovarian cysts which YES WARRIOR are a side effect of Tamoxifen(sort of)......ACTUALLY tho from a purely NORMAL anatomy and physiological perspective.........My GYN who also specializes in fertility was GREAT in her explanation: Ovaries by NATURE are cystic structures....menstruating women's ovaries make a cyst and that is a normal part of your cycle prior to bleeding.......Part of the mechanism of Tamoxifen is still not really understood, they just know it has favorable effects in preventing future hormone pos cancers in women w/ history of it....anyway Tamoxifen actually is a cousin of clomid and other fertility drugs which do INDUCE ovulation or.......CYSTS! As a matter of fact I believe there are documented cases, or they used to use Tamoxifen at doses of 40 mg for a few weeks to induce ovulation, increase fertility and HELP women get pregnant. CYsts......should be watched...no it's NOT great for them to get huge, symptomatic, painful but generally speaking they don't do anything surgically unless they do get to be 5cm, have been sitting there a long time, don't look 'clear' or become symptomatic and really painful. I had a 2 and 3 cm 'clear' cyst on either ovary....one went away, the other shrunk and honestly I have no abd/lower back symptoms....yet I still KNOW having my hormone's manipulated does jack w/ me emotionally....but that's a whole nother topic!......anyway "ovaries are cystic in nature" was the phrase my GYN used. SORRY you had all that happen Warrior and Teel, I did worry too when I read my CTA result too but then I had follow up GYN exam that showed changes(improved). Trust Dr. M. She will NOT do you wrong or be cavalier w/ you my dears!
Melanie, sorry about your reaction...and hOPE you're doing better. I gotta tell you I am/was VERY glued. Both adominal(because it was totally revised) as well as breasts....because verticals were revised AND I had a lift...so I had a LOT of glue and the last week or so it has been really bugging me but also is at the stage where it rubs off /dissolves pretty easily in the shower or flakes off the incision and last pm a lot of it sort of flaked off as I lived on the edge and sat dominatrixless to get abreak for an hour or so. I cut off pieces of it that were half off/halff on because it was irritating to have parts of it sticking me. This final drain seems to be winding down! YAY! Have a feeling next weekend-or mUCH sooner I will be drainfree!
Have a great Sunday!
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I forgot....Now I must ask if anyone else was as fortunate as I and rec'd my favorite christmas gift this year......The Snuggie!....of course in pink because it is the 'limited edition' snuggie- apparently 50,000.00 from the sales of the 'limited edition pink snuggie' will be donated to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation. I know you're all going to run out and buy one now! Have to love an 'as seen on TV' Christmas!
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Dear Friends:
I have been off the breast forum for over a week because I am so depressed. Everyone is always so up - no matter what happens - that I just didn't want to bring anyone down. But this has not been a good week for me.
To start at the beginning I was doing okay after surgery (Stage 2) until I got off the plane in DTW from NOLA. While I was talking to the man with the wheel chairs in the lobby right outside of the plane I was attacked. A man about 6'l" took his small hard suitcase and deliberately rammed it into my back. I waited 20 minutes for the manager and police to arrive. The man was long gone. They took a report and I have heard nothing from Delta. I have been in none stop pain from my lower back to head. I am on Vicodin for the pain.
Then to add to my depression I took off my nipple guards after 8 days and was socked to see a 1 inch scar going horizontal from each side of each nipple. My breasts are so scarred that all I see are scars now. Had I known I would not have gone for stage two. I certainly would not have gone for nipples. I would have maybe gone for the 3D Tattoos. I wish I had known. My breasts were so beautiful after stage 1.Is there anyone else who had there nipples done and woke up with extra scars on each side of each nipple?
So I am sitting here not being able to do much. All doctors at home are on vacations till the first of the year. I can't take any aspirin products or anti-inflammatory products to help me with my back for two weeks because of surgery.
I am feeling very sorry for myself at this point. Wishing I had just stayed home and all would have been well. I was so happy with the results of stage 1. I never thought I would look worse after stage 2 but I do.I have written one of the nurses and asked why all of the scars. I really look like a road map. I hope things improve.
Sassie
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Oh Sassie -
I am so sorry to hear of your attack!! Did you get any witness names?? Feel free to PM me - I will give you some pointers on how to contact the airline and file a complaint....I have been a flight attendant for 27 years, and the behavior of some of our traveling public never ceases to amaze me. I am so, so sorry.
You have every right to feel sorry for yourself - I would be feeling the same! My surgery is a month from today, and I am scared to death. I keep trying to give myself "pep-talks" - but it is not taking away the anxiety. Ladies - did anyone else feel this way?? I am also having some crazy dreams as well - last week I screamed in the middle of night ...."HELP MEEEEEEEEEE" - it scared my daughter to death!!
Sassie, I don't know what to tell you except that I feel you pain. Hopefully the scars will begin to fade, and you will start to feel better. My thoughts are with you - I wish I were there to give you a big -but gentle - hug.
xoxo
LouAnn
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Sassie girl I just wrote you a long post and LOST IT!!!!
Here's the thing ..I just lifted my shirt to look at my incisions ..and had to look really closely to even see the scars ( & I dont fade well and Idont have areola tatoos!) I believe in time you will be happy...but it takes time. I remember seeing them for the first time (wasnt sure I even wanted them) and I was freaked! The smooth surface of the new breasts I had lived with for 4 months after stage 1 were now marred by stitches and incisions...now you can barely see anything and IF I have them tatooed I am sure no incisions will be visible! Have heart...
Another thing that I experienced was post surgical depression...I think the anesthesia contributes to it and lets face it NONE of us would be undergoing surgery of this magnitude just for fun...so there are some very emotional aspects of the journey involved here..do not feel bad because you aren't feeling so joyful RIGHT NOW.you will be down the road...I promise! The NOLA Docs will move heaven and earth to make you happy with your results,count on that!
The guy who shoved you should be charged ,,,they can find him via their records.I am so angry someone would try and injure you!
PM if you like~
gentle understanding hugs,Marcia
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Sassie - omg! You were attacked? Why would this man ram the suitcase into your back?? Was he angry?? Did they catch him? That is awful.. I'm so sorry... and sorry to hear you are disappointed after Stage 2
I haven't even gone for Stage 1 yet so I don't know anything about the nipple stage and different options... but did they not tell you what to expect? So sorry... hang in there... I hope things improve quickly....Warrior - so sorry!! that sounds so painful.... ugh... this Christmas was not your best but the year is coming to a close and 2010 is our year... that's what I keep telling myself....
plainjane - lol.. I too have a Snuggie.. a blue one.... I always seem to end up with "as seen on tv" gifts from DS and DH.. lol...
ccbaby - you are inspirational indeed.. keep up the good posts!
teel - I know telling a bc survivor not to worry.. is like talking to a wall.. I think we all will worry about anything remotely suspicious..... forever.. but I hope the follow up comes quickly and eases your mind...
Welp, this time last year I was gearing up for chemo ..... now I'm trying to gear up for Stage 1 reconstruction.... what a difference a year makes.... I hope this time next year I won't be gearing up for anything at all!! That would be nice.....
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Sassie....It was so nice to meet you at NOLA. You seem like a very strong spirited woman. Do not let this incident with that jerk get you down. He must have anger issues and someday he will get his. I am sure that the scars are just part of the way they give you nipples and maybe the tattoos in stage 3 will cover any scars left? Melanie just got her nips that same week, I am sure she wouldn't mind sharing her story with you about how hers look. Take care and PM me if you need....BIG hugs!
Holtbolt...thank you so much!
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Sassie~
First of all I am so sorry that you were hurt in that way. I'm sure that doesn't help in feeling good about life right now. Second, lots of people suffer from post anethesia depression. Third, you aren't the only one who has felt that way after the stage 2 nipples. I have friend who also had a moment of shock. She was so used to her round, full breats, that seeing the nipple and scars made her sad.
I have those same scars. I guess I am different in that I didn't mind the scars at all. I was just SO happy to have nipples! I hadn't had them in so long that I was just in awe of them.
When you go for tattooing, they will be all covered up! So you won't even see them any more. And if you are one of the lucky ladies who scar nicely and who's scars fade well, even better. I keloid and have bright red scars still, so mine are kind of in your face.
But look: the tattoos cover them up:
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Sassie....That is EXACTLY what you needed to see...TRISHIA!! Thanks, T, for doing that!! When I feel like it is still a long journey to the final result...I think of your pics and all of you on Timtam. Its a process but all so worth it in the end. I am so sorry Sassie that this has happened and people are rude like that...contact LouAnn since she has so much experience in the airline industry. Please know you can call me ANYTIME!
I am happy to say that today is the first day since Xmas that I feel somewhat back into the groove. Not quite out of bed for extended period of time but will be tomorrow. Jenniferjane..Thanks for the indepth info on cysts and Tamoxifen...I read it to DH, too!!
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((((((((((((Sassie))))))))) This is where you are supposed to come for support when things go wrong, NOT just the place to talk about what is going right! We are all here for you and feel your pain. Please keep us informed on what happens with the jerk at the airport! I did the same as you.....held it inside that I didn't feel my stage one went very well, and when I finally opened up about it, found out I wasn't alone in feeling that way, so you always have company here no matter what you are feeling. Hang in there.....it gets better!!
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Sassie, the scars will fade! The are red and angry now, but they will become thin white lines, and the ones by nipples will be tattoo'd!
I am now 4 weeks past the nipple recon, and finally the "nipple whiskers" are coming off (just like Trisha said!) and things are really starting to look good. I need my half a tattoo though!
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Thank you ladies for your understanding.
I was really doing fairly well until the attack. Friday I stopped at the Center and picked up some of the supplies they forgot to give me. Then I dropped in for a visit at St. Charles and got to meet Melanie, CCbaby, (and also meet WPLD Tuesday the night before my surgery). I really enjoyed meeting the ladies and sorry we just weren't able to hook up for an evening out. I was really in a pretty good mood.
On Saturday my husband took me down Royal Street and bought me a beautiful necklace for a Christmas present. We stopped at Central Market and got one of their famous sandwiches for the plane ride home. I was sore walking but was doing OK.
On the flight home I was happy I got to sit in the bulkhead with my husband behind me so I could stretch out and rest. So everything was going pretty well. The plane was very quiet with everyone sleeping or reading except for one person. He was in the row behind me and on the opposite side of the row. He had a radio playing without earphones. I asked the stewardess if she would ask the person to turn down his radio. She went over to him and asked him to turn down his radio and basically told him that she didn't have a problem with his radio but I did. She then pointed me out to the man. He didn't stop playing his music and nothing more was said.
After the plane landed I got off first and waited by the wheel chairs. The man took his suitcase and hit me in the back so hard that it was like being in a car accident with whiplash. I had migraine headaches for 3 days and vomited. Now I just can't move my head or bend over to pick up anything. It has been a week and I am not getting better at all. Tomorrow I am calling to see if I can get in to see a specialist. But I know what that means. X-rays, MRI's when I am hurting .
Trishia thank you for sharing. What a great body. Your breasts look great. I guess I was just naive or not informed. I did not expect the scars on both sides of the nipples. I really think someone at the Center should either give us a book or draw a picture or at least describe the options. Having had delayed like you I am scar phobic. I would like to keep it down to a minimal. Right now I look like a road map. I will try and keep my chin up and hope for better results down the road.
Warrior I think we both have had our fill of challenges for this month and maybe all of next year. I can't believe you had a house full of quests after returning from the hospital.
Melanie I so enjoyed meeting you and CCbaby. I hope your itching stops soon.
Gin52 Thanks for the understanding words.
Thanks to all that have listened and responded. It is nice to have friends when your feeling low.
Sassie
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Sassie, I had my stage 2 on November 12th and a lot of what you are seeing is probably surgical glue. I have scars on either side of my nips but when the glue came off they were actually shorter than what the glue made them look like. They are already starting to fade and I know that they will completely disappear when I get the tats. So will the scars that form the aereolas. And the scar that's vertical looks very minimal since the glue is gone. Then the scars under the breasts are hidden by the folds! What a bunch of scars! But when the redness fades away I'm confident things will look great. They already do. And yours will also.
I'm really sorry that that idiotic man hurt you so much. As if you weren't dealing with enough! Too bad we couldn't all surround him and let him know what an absolute jerk he is. If you know where the man was sitting then the airlines should be able to get his name for you and, frankly, if you have any good witnesses I'd have him arrested for assault. People should not get away with things like this and maybe you can stop him from doing it again. I'm certain the airline should still have the manifest - it hasn't been that long.
Please take care of yourself and know that your girls will be looking waaaay awesome soon!!
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Sassie....That just really upsets me about what that jerk did to you AND what the flight attendant did as well. I'm sorry, but she needs to be turned in for her actions and now that you have explained how it happened with that man, I think charges need to be pressed for assault. Maybe you should talk to a lawyer?
Trish....wow! you look great! thanks for sharing the pic with us!
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Sassie - I'm so sorry.. that story made me really angry.. I agree with CCbaby... the flight attendant did the WRONG thing by singling you out about the music... and YES... file assault charges against this jerk if you can! I just can't believe he did that.... did he act like it was an accident and scurry away? No one saw it? Ugh.... I can't imagine what that felt like.. what an idiot!!!
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Sassie...Glad you could come here to share,weather its good or bad...You can see how loved you are by all the emotions we are sharing WITH you!!
Ginnie..How is chemo going? I think of you often and just think NEXT Christmas..this will be ALL behind you!! xo
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Sassie, I put that pic up to reassure you. I know it is a long process! And our bodies have been through so much. But we will come up looking good! And feeling even better. Humor gets me through a lot of things in my life. So I just joke that I am Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas because I have so many scars.
A call to the airlines is definitely in order.
Thanks ladies for all the compliments. 20 more lbs to go and I am at goal weight! I will be in a bikini this summer for sure! Just like Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!
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)) You just go Ms Trishia!! You look FABULOUS now...wheres the other 20 coming from????
P.S. You and I were both delayed recon ... I call myself the cabbage patch kid~!!
With love,
Marcia
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WARRIOR - Terrible! I am so sorry for your troubles. I hope you feel better real soon. Thank goodness 2010 is just around the corner, A NICE NEW HEALTHY START for you and DH! I will be sending healing thoughts your way.
GIN - ditto what Warrior said, I think of you often and the journey thru chemo. Rest often and drink plenty of fluid. It will be over sooner than you imagined, just seems like a lifetime when you are going thru it.....and twice as long when you are waiting for the hair to grow back, but you can get thru it and we are all here for you, Nobody has more compassion for you that those that have endure it! HANG IN THERE!
SASSIE - I am so sorry that you had to suffer at the hands of such an idiot. Some people are jsut plain mean! I sure hope you feel better soon enough from that incident. As for the first site of the new nipples, I would be lying if I told you I was thrilled. I was a little shocked too, but to be honest, the glue and the blue marker and the redness from the incisions, and the nipple wiskers (as Spring calls them and thats exactly what they look like......shoot now not do I not only have hairy boobs, but nipples with wiskers! What the heck? )....it all looked pretty darn UGLY. I thought to myself ....what was I thinking, the redness from stage 1 was just starting to fade a bit and now I am basically starting over. Plus it was pretty painful, more so than I expected (less than stage 1 certainly) but still more than I think I expected. Also, ditto on the post surgery depression thing, My DH must remind everytime that the first 2 weeks after surgery, I am completely NOT MYSELF. I am listless, down, grumpy and basically mad at myself for not being able to JUMP back to life. I HATE not being able to do what I want and NEED to do, It is a major adjsutment for me. But then I always bounce back and start to feel better, this time the itching has really gotten to me and held me back, otherwise I think I would be pretty good by now. I have had to pick the glue off for obvious reasons and now that I have, the scars beside the nipples look way better. When the glue comes off, the marker does too (I guess that is what it is, blue marker???) It looks so much better without that. I was THRILLED to see Trishia's pics and now I cannot wait to get my tattooing done. Give it time and be patient with yourself, I am sure you will be feeling back to your old self very soon.
TRISHIA - THANK YOU. I needed to see that pic! GREAT BODY GIRL! How old are your DIEP scars, you look really really good! Now its: TRISHIA TRISHIA TRISHIA! and MARCIA MARCIA MARCIA!
CCBABY - I plan to have tattooing in the spring and NOT at mardi gras time, I do not have anything scheduled as yet. I will have to find out when my son will be home for spring break and then get back to you. Maybe we can hook up. I am not sure if we will try for a weekend or if I will just fly down for the day and get r done. I think my DH has one more trip in him. I am so glad to hear that you are getting around so so well, You are amazing.
JJ - my daughter begged me to get my Mom a leopard print snuggie for xmas, but I would not do it. Maybe I should have! Ha! AND BTW, how'd you like the snow on Xmas day! Was it like 80 years since the last white xmas for DFW? Wow.
later girls, xxoo Mel....got to go scratch! HA!
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Sassie, I too hope you file a complaint with the airline. How awful! That flight attendant needs a consequence. I guess there is no hope catching the person? But wait, you know what seat he was in... are you able to pursue it with the police? Assault charges?
I also agree with Charleston - about the stitches and surgical glue... Recently, most of that just came off for me (and my stage 2 was Dec 1, so around 4 weeks) and everything looks SO MUCH BETTER -- all the glue holds in the black stitches, and it is sort of blobby and does not look good at all. It is like hatching a golden egg when that gunk is ready to peel off! A beauty underneath!
Trisha, you look beautiful to me. You honestly do! Scars be damned!
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Gosh Trishia you again look maaaaaavelous!
I'll chime in and agree about the glue....It does work well but doesn't look so lovely at first...Oh man I had lotsa blue that came off w/ the glue!
Sassie......so very sorry that first class A HOLE! did that....press away on charges!
As for the depression/letdown.......I am queen, I am pretty sure I have had more whiney poor me the world is out to get me posts than anyone....but I went back and deleted a few!....Stage 2 did NOT leave me initially w/ the absolute WIRED, EUPHORIC feeling I had after stage 1........but I was So freakin happy to be liberated from ducts and lobules last september I'm not sure anything could repeat that high. I've been in somewhat of a funk, moody, major chip on my shoulder since I was discharged on dec 12th almost? Just not really myself....hard to put a finger on...trying to be patient, rest and not so hard on myself( I for one don't do that well either). But, yes, bizarre- tears in the hospital on dc day and just almost an anticlimactic feeling....then throw in the getting swollen, nauseated, sick, not the greatest support and The holidays which I KNOW for most people are great but for me they just usually are not so YES, I have been depressed BUT.....it IS passing. However I feel like what Melanie said too......I am sort of having unrealistic expectations. IT TAKES TIME........to heal physically , mentally, emotionally. And yeah my body still is sore, still hurts....I have to take naps and fall asleep before 9pm usually. I haven't been thru half of what some of you have but I DO KNOW our docs want us to be happy and go to great lengths to make sure we are.
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PJ - hang in there, I am now having a good day and then a not so good day,pretty soon, I am hoping to put 2 together in a row! I am extremely HYPER! (prednizone), just ran out and got all the stuff for Mr B's bread pudding...30 eggs in total! Yikes. My daughter said: MOM that will kill you!". Oh well, something is going to and once in a while will not hurt, right? Just call me "Martha". I am putting together a new orleans feast for the new years holiday, Jambilya (sp?), greens, corn grits, bread pudding and cabbage and black eyed peas! Yummy! got to run, busy busy busy.
Oh, one more thing, does anybody still have the fluid pockets, I have a "bubble" of fluid on my lower back area, and my thighs are pretty puffy still. I did get on the scales and I weight EXACTLY what I did prior to stage 2, I thought maybe I would lose 5 pounds, knowing that Idid not have a lot and some was moved to the breast area. Let me know how you are and what you are looking like these days and how goes the fluid. My body is still itchy, I only have one more prednizone tablet left, I hope that it will go away. It is better but not cured! So let me know what you think about that as well. xxoo love ya kiddo! HAPPY NEW YEARS!
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Sassie - so sorry about that characterless coward. I would absolutely file a police report and since you know the man's seat and can identify him there should be no problem. Also there really is something to post anaesthesia depression. I wasn't attacked like you were but I was pretty wiggy the first two weeks after surgery. My poor husband bore the brunt of it. Anytime I get a glimpse of the ugliness in people I get a bit depressed. Hang in there.
Warrior - my thoughts are with you. I hate that you have had a set back. But I can't forget how tough you were strolling those hallways in NOLA. Sending you positive thoughts for good things to come in 2010.
Girls, today I found out I do have to have chemo. Dr. Lagarde said, after my surgery at NOLA, that because my nodes were negative and my tumor less than 1cm, I might not even have to have chemo. I have to confess, ever since hearing that I've secretly been counting on that AND eyeing my basket of pony tail holders and hair paraphanalia with a knowing we'll always be together smile.
Well, the oncologist's nurse told me today that because of my phathology (HER2 positive, FISH positive, Grade III, and 60%proliferation), there is no question that I will have chemo.
On the one hand, I'm certainly not happy to have chemo, but on the other I'm glad there's no discussion -- I was afraid I'd be "in the grey area" and the decision would be up to me which I would hate.
I'm so incredibly lucky that my cancer was caught early and I'm grateful beyond words. But it's still a bit sobering to realize that as I'm recovering, getting a little stronger each day from surgery, I'm just preparing to dive off the chemo cliff as soon as I'm feeling good.
Best,
T
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Teel - I am so sorry to hear that you will have to go thru this, BUT so happy you do not have to make a decision for yourself, I think that would be really really terrible, BUT on the other hand, we are here for you, whatever you need, supporting you all the way. It is totallydo-able. Best wishes for a cancer free 2010!
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Here here, Melanie!
To 2010. 0 -
Oh Teel. You sound pretty together for a woman staring chemo eye to eye.... Your description of communing with the pony tail holders hits home! Our Ginnie is in chemo now too. Also, check the listings.... for the group of women who will go through it the same time as you. I was part of the "Chemo in Sept 08" thread and made some lifetime buddies on that list! a great support and way to compare notes.
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Teel.....I did chemo (taxotere and carboplatin) from March to July and it is doable. The time actually does go by fast. You need to think of it as insurance that the chemo will 'clean' up any possible leftover cancer cells. Will you be doing Herceptin because you are HER2+? I started my Herceptin along with the chemo and will continue until March. I literally have no side effects from it at all. (I just had a treatment today) If you have any questions, please feel free to PM me. Good luck!0
