MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish
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Yes, I like that casual, laidback photo as well. And marlegal, I don't know that anyone took your remarks as argumentative & I love what you said about the unfairness of doing our own legwork & then not having a consensus-that is my biggest complaint about all the "research" out there about anything! Eggs-bad, now eggs good, now-bad; wine-good, oh no, it's bad, oh-no it's great! I like my info in black & white not shades of gray.
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marlegal--I didn't take anything in this discussion as argumentative. Like Eph said, we often share info on the boards here, and I, for one, appreciate seeing articles from both (or all) sides of a question. I like to look at the articles myself and determine how strong or weak I feel the research being reported is. Hearing opinions and thoughts different from my own helps me be sure that I'm aware of ALL the possibilities. I've been let down too many times by the docs that I have access to to really be able to totally trust them. I'm really jealous of you ladies who have docs you can really trust!
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dang...I thought that was from PARTY night....I must of had to much to drink...I was for sure some of those women looked familiar(lol,lol)
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they are dressed too casual for our party. Remember The animals skins?
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Our Middie thread: One year and STILL a catfight free zone!
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Looks like they started to tangle, but then just felt too comfy! It is comfy here, you know.
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Yes it is Meece.
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thanks guys ... I've been in chat since 2005, and some board sites, but was fairly new to this particular group (other than cookiegal) so I didn't want to get off on the wrong foot and be misinterpreted. as for pictures, here's a real one for a gathering of chatters in las vegas in 2008. i met 27 women, 25 of whom i'd never laid eyes on before! this night we had a pj party (room donated by the hotel for 1 overnight) and it was a blast, in case that isn't obvious. can't make it bigger or you lose all clarity
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Liver biopsy went well. Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy. Thank you all for the well wishes and prayers. Find out results on Friday. Pink Hugs,
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Good for you, PD! Now go get a nap!
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Okay, so i'd imagine that many of us are maried to the same a* holes for a long time? do we just let them be idiots for a long time? or - like today - do we assert oursevlves and then mr. crho magnum man turns into a really flaming idiot???
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i really do luv hub, but truly...somtimes...what proof he gives me that we're descended from a lower life form!!
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marlegal, you are coming out of left field. You did not mention what your husband did to set you off today???? Lots of women on here have "DHs" (first, second , third, but who's counting?) and I have an "H" that is not so "D" because he's been in his mid-life man-o-pause (IMO) for a few years now and that getting tiring. We have some singles too, so they have to go on frequent dates to acquire our levels of frustration.0
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How many have seen "Eat, Pray, Love" ? Saw it today & wasn't as entertained as I'd hoped to be. One line I really liked was, "Not looking for a man, looking for a champion!" or something to that effect & I had to laugh, cause that is still the knight in shining armor syndrome so many of thought we had & didn't, or wish we had & don't.
So best of luck to you & your "H"s ladies or your "SO"s or whatever they are called nowadays!
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2 years. Hub is not perfect, but decent guy.
I actually really liked E<P<L...I bought the book right afterward. I love to travel, and now with my lymphedema I am scared to go on long trips, so I like the vicarious travel.
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I had a DH (D*** HEAD) for nearly 22 years. Five years ago I married DH whose D stands for dear. He is by no means perfect, and there are times I wonder if he lives in a cave and carries a club, but all in all, I am so far better off now than I was. I will not bash him for an occasional burst of testosterone.
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marle,
Even those of us who have so far skipped chemo suffer from "brain farts". Since I'm going to be 51 soon, and was dx'd at 48, it really is hard to discern if it's from the stress of cancer, tamoxifen or menopause kicking in. Either way, I HATE it when I have the "brain farts", especially in front of the students, or worse, the administrator.
(We won't go into my introductory meeting this week.) 
I hit hubby's truck while pulling out of the driveway this morning - never saw the damn thing. After a few choice words from him, (after my apology) I left in tears.
He redeemed himself from the lower-life form when he called me an hour later to say the truck was fine, he was able to push most of the dent out, and for me not to worry about it. At times like that, I try to remember what we've BOTH been through, and he has his meltdowns too.I'm almost 2 years out of rads and am finding people are expecting me to "get beyond" the cancer. But we know, that's not possible - the damn beast is lurking around every day, and the smallest chink in our emotional armor is all it takes for a meltdown. I don't post much on this board, ladies, but reading how you feel and cope is so helpful. It's refreshing that there's somewhere we can be brutally honest about all of this.
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Everybody has meltdowns, and other times when we are able to handle the stress better. One of the secrets to a "happy" marriage is scheduling things so you don't both have a meltdown at the same time.
This weekend I've been feeling the need for a few minutes of privacy which seem impossible to get in my house, even taking a shower has been interrupted on a regular basis recently. I told my DH that I needed some alone time, so I was heading out to the store. His response was that he needs new windshield wipers for his car can he come along? Luckily he caught the withering look as I repeated that I needed to get out of the house alone, and decided that the windshield wipers were not an emergency. How come a 55 year old can't buy them by himself???????
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Patmom, my DH and I made a deal at the beginning of our relationship that we're not allowed to be mad at the same time. So if I'm mad first, I get to rant and rave. He has to wait his turn. OMG what fun we've had with that trying not to laugh while we wait for the other guy to cool down!!!! hehehehehe
I've watched him stomp on a new cowboy hat and he's watched me throw my scotch and soda across the garage. And then when he didn't react, I threw his! hehehehehehehe
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A while ago I was grousing to a friend about someone who expected me to be "over the whole cancer thing" by now. I mentioned that she had never seemed to have that attitude and she told me that she understood--she'd met people who expected her to "get over" the deaths of 2 of her children. She said she'll never get over it, she's just learned to live life despite it. I think that's what we all do. She died last week a couple days after being diagnosed with cancer all through her abdomen. She was technically never a cancer survivor, but sometimes I felt she understood my feelings and reactions more than anyone else I know. She understood meltdowns and wasn't afraid of them. I'm going to miss her.
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NM, I am sad about your friend..sounds like she a had rough go, but how wonderful that she was there for you. I miss her for you. Joni
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It's been 3 and 1/2 years since my original diagnosis. I had done well after I got through all of my intial treatments and "got back into my life". Until this past January when I discovered that the cancer had returned, spread to my bones now. I had radiation at the time and felt good again. I had another PET scan the beginning of Aug and found out that I have 5 new spots. Three on my spine, one thyroid and one lymph node under my left arm. I have very limited treatment options because of the triple negative part of my diagnosis. Up until recently I had made up my mind that I would not go through chemo again because it was so horrible the first time and I feel that at this point the quality of my life is more important. But I just found out that I'm going to be a grandma in February. Now I'm re-evaluating what strength I have to fight. I certainly have many good reasons to fight but it seems like such a losing battle at this point. I don't know what to do.
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Christine, you are so young to have so much behind & in front of you. "I don't know what to do" you say & I don't presume to have an answer, I just know that for me, I'll go out kicking & screaming because until I'm dead, I'm not done. My response to this probably would have been completely different before April 2, 2009, but even though chemo sucked, even though rads burned, even though I couldn't take off much time because I'm a single mom with no support from the former father, even though I hated the process, that process has given me the extra time & I will always fight for more time! The threads on this website have been a life raft for me many times...I hope you will find encouragement, humor, resolve, strength and most of all purpose as you join us on this journey.
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Yes, you DO know what to do cmkfloralbiz...you don't give up! I am so sorry to hear about your recurrence and the "axis of evil" that has taken up strategic positions in your body. I would encourage you to try whatever treatment is available. If it too horrible, then stop, but it might well be worth giving it a chance. New drugs are coming down the pipeline, too, so hang in there.
I see you are a "newbie" to B/C.org, so let me point out that there are threads here for women who are triple negative, also Stage IV women. While I welcome you to our thread (and we are a mixed Dx group of caring sisters,) you may also learn a lot on those threads I mentioned. Until you get to 50 posts, you can only post five a day; but you can send unlimited PMs by clicking on another members name.
Besides all that, I say welcome to our group!
p.s. I forgot to say CONGRATS on the upcoming grandbaby!
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cmkfloralbiz I second what Eph312 and elimar said: you mustn't give up. The chemo regemins are so much better and they have so many anti-nausea drugs that you can make it through with minimal discomfort. You need to fight for you so you can be there for your kids and grandchild.0
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cmkfloralbiz: Eph312 is so right. Welcome to our group, but also check out some of the other groups that match your status. You are going to do good through chemo. The ups and down are going to be behind you someday and you will look back and be amazed at how strong you are.
Now about DH. Mine is something else. Yes we have had our highs and lows but he has just gotten better with age. I don't know how I got so damn lucky. I sometimes feel so guilty because now he's got the menopausal, lop-sided boobie, broken down woman. He always reminds me that he still sees the 100 lb. hot mama he fell in love with about 30 years ago.
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Now THAT's a keeper, Paulding!
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My DH met me during chemo, and despite the fact that I was exhausted, weak and bald, kept on courting me. After all tx was completed, he asked me to marry him.
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Oooh, I am blinded by the shine of his armor! That man is straight out of a fairy tale, girl!
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I feel that way at times. We have our moments. But we've been through some really tough times and made it through so that's says something for our relationship. The cancer part was a breeze because we weren't "committted" at that time, I dealt with it on my own.
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