MIDDLE-AGED WOMEN 40-60ish
Comments
-
Oh Sandi, Its so unfair to have to go through this a third time! Keep positive and you will get through it and we are here for you when you need to yell, vent, cry, rant, etc. Kitty
0 -
Sandi, I feel for you and can't imagine what you must be going through. I'll be praying for you.0
-
{{{SANDI}}} Sending gentle hugs your way.
0 -
Samdi - mot only is it NOT FAIR (my favorite phrase). It totally, absolutley SUCKS beyond all levels of suckage. So sorry - I don't know what else to say. You know, we're all here for you, whenever you need us. Hoping for the best with your appointment on Thursday. I don't know if you know about our "pocket pals support program." It's all virtual, but I was amazed at the calm and comfort, it brought me, when I had to have some scary testing recently. Imagine yourself wearing something with big pockets, we'll all jump in and be right there with you, in spirit, during this appointment. Hoping for the best news possible on Thursday.0
-
(((((((Sandi))))))))))
0 -
Sandi - The third time? That is so wrong. This has got to be maddening. At least you are loaded with information that a first timer would not have. No, that is not any consellation but it is true. Hope for the best on Thurs. Please let us know how it goes. ((((HUGS))))
0 -
I am still having problems from taxol I have numbness in hands and feet. My right ankle is so sore and I think I sprained it but it seems to never get better. I now have only 14 treatments of radiation left. Sat we are having Celebration of Life at the Hospital.
0 -
Wayyyy too many pages to read, but I did start with the page of the mystery pic. I saw a few chocolate brownie guesses and a couple pomegranate guesses ...
My guess for mystery pic - portabello mushroom
Welcome to some newbies, and my most special gentle hugs to those still in treatment. To those waiting for results, know you're in my prayers this week.
Hugs all around
0 -
Mystery pic guess - Mango?
0 -
I hope we have good weather for our lunch next Sunday. A little bit cooler than this weekend would be nice, but I just want it to be sunny. I checked Pickety Place out on the web and it looks like a nice place to explore.
Debbie - I was up in Chelmsford yesterday. I did the Walk From Obesity charity walk with my DB and SIL.. I was the last to finish the 2 mile walk, but I was also one of the last to start. Considering that 2 years ago I could barely walk, I was quite proud of myself. A big thank you to my othropedic surgeon for my new knees.
Over the last week, I've seen a big improvement in the nerve irritation from my PMX. But, I'm still so tired. I know I did too much yesterday. It wasn't the walk that did me in, it was everything I did the rest of the day. I've spent all day today in bed or my recliner. I'll have to pace myself next Saturday, so I have enough energy for Sunday.
I actually watched a video, of a modified radical mastectomy on youtube today. No wonder why I've felt such nerve irritation. Even though this time ALL I had was a simple MX - it is very big surgery. My curiousity was aroused by a book I'm reading, "Bathsheba's Breast" that describes the history of breast cancer treatment - from ancient Egypt to this century. It's facinating, but also discouraging. The treatments just seem to be earlier versions of what is still being done today. So far, I haven't read anything in the book for research on prevention or a cure. Jo - your response to one of my posts several days ago is exactly what I'm thinking - where is all that money for research going????
0 -
sandi, we're here for you anytime. please keep in touch with us. we all truly care. i'm sending you hugs, too.0
-
Ok today starts the BIG prep, as drink my coffee without cream. YUCK. I have to take my gallon of water to work with me--supposed to start at 1pm---my boss has me scheduled till 3--told her I may have to bug out early. Its a 20 minute drive to my house. Can I make it?? Have to go shopping for a really big bag for everyone to fit in tomorrow. OOH boy, can't wait. What really bothers me the most about a colonscopy is that you don't get to keep the weight off that you lose!!! No fair, you go thru sooo much to lose it!!!
0 -
I agree, no fair!!! I'll be in the bag, please get an orange one so I can bring the Cheetos this time!
0 -
Ok, I hope some of you who have or have had teens can help me out here. I was really mad yesterday but I have calmed down a little. My daughter is 15 and about 4 months ago we allowed her to start dating a friend who was 17. The rules were only in a group or at one of their houses with confirmed parental supervision. We felt the age were pushing it and also warned that if he couldn't respect her age and the fact that she was not in the same place as someone who is almost an adult. Well, a few weeks ago, some of what he said and did weren't matching up and I warned her to be careful and watch. She has and yesterday discovered that he has been lying about his age. It turns out he is not fraternal twins with his brother as he stated and he is really 18, not 17. I was really angry because with the other stuff he has done, I just don't trust him now and neither does she. The issue is that she is really attached and already struggling with my cancer. In addition, I start chemo tomorrow and don't know how much more she is going to have to deal with. He also called last night and left her a message that he was on the way to the hospital and would not be in school today-no other explanation, which I think was really manipulative as well because who wouldn't tell the person what it was for so they wouldn't worry? She is a really good girl and super smart and the truth is, I just don't know how to help her for the first time. She has to break up with him and she knows it is for the best, but she has asked this morning if she can still be friends with him because he has become important in her life and would still like to be there as a friend for him.
I think some of what is going on is guilt. In order to see her, he left his church and has been alienated by his family members that are still a part of that church. So, he has gone through a lot to be able to go out with her. On the other hand, she is smart, beautiful and really sweet, so I feel he just likes how she makes him feel and that is why he did all this, not because he really cared about her. Does that make sense? Any thoughts that might help me figure this out would be appreciated. I am not sure if I am glad for the distraction from chemo starting tomorrow or if I am mad that I can't spend today relaxing and getting prepared. I can't think straight because I am was already worried about how cancer and its treatment would prevent me from being there for her like I need to and now I'm even more worried about that.
I know this was long, sorry, I just need some outside views cause I am so emotional with everything going on that I'm not even sure how I should feel or react to it all.
0 -
Claire...count me in that bag hon! Since mine will be scheduled in the next few weeks I need to know what to expect. Thinking of you and know i will be there for you tomorrow!
LeeAnn, my sister recently experienced something like this with her daughter. She was dating an older kid, but he was still in hs. My niece was 17. Long story short, tons of drama and he too became very manipulative when the inevitable breakup came. Bottom line, your daughter sounds like a good kid and honest. This "friend" has lied from the beginning and sounds like he is creating drama now (going to the ER).....to gain her sympathy. To me, huge red flags. I find lying unacceptable, period. I can't really suggest what you do, but just see the red flags for what they are and please be very careful. A 15 year old girl is so, so vulnerable, and he sounds like trouble.
0 -
Yeah, he doesn't know yet that she found out about his age. She wanted to not talk to him until she had a day or two to regain the strength she needed to tell him it is over. You are right...red flags are red flags and I can't just ignore them because it will give a short-term fix to her sadness.
0 -
lwarstler-- If he lied about his age, what else is he lying about? If he had to leave his church to see her and the church made no effort to include her, is he lying about this or is his church truly Bible-based? If his family opposes his seeing her, and he sees her anyway, if the relationship goes further will he disregard HER feelings about things? Things like having children or abortion in the case of an unintended pregnancy? Please don't think I'm suggesting that your DD would be sexually active with him--I'm thinking about freinds who were married and had unplanned, unintended pregnacies. She's wise to break up with him, but would be wise to break off all contact with him.
0 -
MY POOR BOOB!!!!!!! Okay boob and armpit! I am really sore, started peeling this weekend and hurts so much. I do have lidocaine I mix with Aquaphor and it helps temporarily. My nipple is so raw and all the skin around it has peeled and is raw. When I got up this morning there was a damp stain on my t-shirt and a matching one on the sheet. I sleep on my left side (rad side) and try so hard to fall asleep in a different position, but always wake up on the left. So the peeling is weepy at night. Grrrrrr. I am leaving for rads in a few minutes, am curious to see if they will do treatment or not. It looks pretty sad. Only a few treatments left so really just want to get them over with and not have any more delays.
Okay whine over! I hope you are all doing well. Hang in there Lee Ann!
0 -
Janis, use emu oil. It really heals. Google emu oil radiation burns.
0 -
I 'saw' Eli and Marybe, Amy and Chrissy on Facetime for iPad last night. They are having a blast in MO.
0 -
Janis - ((((HUGS))) - Very gentle hugs.
0 -
LeeAnn, I totally agree with Janis and NativeMainer. He's lying and manipulative, all not good signs for any kind of relationship! I wish you the best and to your DD. Kitty
0 -
Thanks guys, sometimes it's just good to know I'm not just being over emotional because of everything else going on. I wonder if I can trust my thought processes at the moment. It seemed aweful to me, but I am starting chemo tomorrow and just feeling really panicked about everything. I think I am thinking straighter now.
0 -
Janis-I posted this back in Nov '09 on the Oct '09 rad thread. I was really "raw" by the time my last boost was done. My RO gave me the following tip & I must say it worked it's healing magic fairly quickly.
"My rad onc had me soak a washrag with a solution of 1/2 hydrogen peroxide and 1/2 water and I would lay that washrag on the places where I was coming apart and then air dry. I healed quite quickly using that remedy."
0 -
Was there a reveal on the mystery pic???
0 -
No not yet Eph
0 -
My apologies to have kept you all waiting on the big revealof Mystery Pic. I have been reading thru' and there were SIX good observers/smarty pants' amongst you. It is the "butt end" of a POMEGRANATE! The win goes to Paula66. I really thought it would be more mysterious than it was, but the six of you really know your tasty, yet annoying, 100-seeded fruits.
0 -
I was away all weekend (as you might have seen BarbA's post) as I finally got to go to one of the BC.org women get togethers. This one was hosted by a past, and sometimes even now, poster to this thread, Marybe. It was also one of the stops for ChrissyB's whirlwind tour of America. Those that know Chrissy are probably following the thread that chronicles this adventure, "The Journey Has Begun" thread. So, check that out if you would like to see and read about the Shell Knob group I got to hang with.
I will also fill you in shortly when I get a bit more time to write about it, & I'll throw in a few pics too.
0 -
Can't wait to see the pics. Chrissy is coming to San Antonio next and we are having a get together on Saturday. Should be fun!!
0 -
Lee Ann - don't you hate that things always seem to happen at the same time? I am so sorry you have chemo starting just as your daughter is dealing with this! Such a bummer that the "friend" is turning out to be festooned with warning signs. My girls are 14 1/2 and 16, and so far we've been boyfriend-free, thank goodness. On the good side, it sounds as though your 15 year old is past that awful early teenage stage of irrationality. I think of it as being a toddler, only with better arguing skills. My 14 year old, for example, would specifically NOT drink water when we were at an amusement park mid-summer and it was 98 with 90+% humidity, just because I asked her to. So if your daughter is aware of the fact that it's time to let this fish go, that's a good thing. My youngest would specifically hang onto the guy, just because I suggested possibly she shouldn't.
The longer we go before she gets into a relationship, the better - otherwise, you'll see us on Montel.Girls usually don't get to keep boys as "just friends," especially as teenagers, because usually the boy hasn't moved on. Since she's in high school still, hopefully she'll have lots of good distractions to keep her busy and grounded. I dated a guy in my early 20's who lied about his age to make himself younger. He also lied about other things, as it turned out. To me, lying about his age (and twin status!) is a pretty substantial lie about who he is as a person, and it's usually a sign of BIG character flaws. That kind of lie cancels out the good stuff, to my mind. One basic red flag I always talk to my girls about is the older-teenage-boy, younger-girl thing. Our next door neighbor boy dated a 17 year old when he was 20 - he was not successful with his own age range, but this cute 17 year old was very impressed that an older guy liked her. There are SO many differences in maturity level and stage of life between 15 and 18, even if they allegedly have magical chemistry and he's a late bloomer and she's mature for her age. It's more about life experience.
One thing I will add: consider having your daughter write down her concerns and the reasons she thinks she needs to break up with him. Sometimes if you're a sweet person and a smooth, seemingly nice guy has you in his grasp but you need to be tough and break away, it's necessary to STUDY your thoughts so you can be strong and committed to your actions.
She's lucky to have a great mom like you that she can talk to and get support from! Good luck to you with your overly-busy "middle" moments this week!
Coleen
0
