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The dumbest things people have said to you/about you

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Comments

  • proudtospin
    proudtospin Member Posts: 4,671
    edited June 2012

    just got my call back from my first 1 year mamo (after doing them every 6 months for 3 years I was put on the 1 year timing), they said I need to return for more images

    my boobies are "misshapened".....well they did take 3 chunks out and guess they forgot to "reshape" them

    duh, back for more images

  • riley702
    riley702 Member Posts: 575
    edited June 2012

    Miss Manners is an enthusiastic proponent of the icy stare for the bumblers, too. As far as remembering the comeback lines, that's a bit more of a problem, even 2 yrs PFC. BC: the gift that keeps on giving. Again. Some more. *sigh*

    Duh is right, PTS. Like they thought maybe YOU were somehow unaware of what they'd done to your body? Or worse, thought you'd somehow managed to forget? (fat chance!) They deserve an award for being big boobs. And no, not that kind.

  • blessings2011
    blessings2011 Member Posts: 1,801
    edited June 2012

    I think it was Ann Landers (or Dear Abby) who came up with the perfect answer for someone asking intrusive personal questions.

    "You know, if it were any of your business, you'd already know the answer to that question."

  • riley702
    riley702 Member Posts: 575
    edited June 2012

    I like!

  • nativemainer
    nativemainer Member Posts: 7,955
    edited June 2012

    Don't remember where I read it, but one of my favorite lines for intrusive questions is "Why do you suppose a polite person would ask that question?"  I've used it a few times.  It usually goes over the person's head, but at least they change the subject. 

  • shayne
    shayne Member Posts: 524
    edited June 2012

    Both those are great - but the Ann Landers one is perfection!!  LOVE IT!!

  • SheChirple
    SheChirple Member Posts: 95
    edited June 2012

    I scheduled my exchange surgery this week.  I sent an email to my supervisor to let him know.  I said "My next surgery is July 23rd.  I will be out for 3 weeks.  I will be revisiting my scheduled vacation that was to start July 16.  I will let you know.  Thank you for your patience and understanding as I go through these procedures."  His reply:  "Wishing you good health.  No apologies necessary."

    WHAT?  No apologies necessary?  What did I, or do I, need to apologize for?  I did not apologize.  I thanked you for your understanding. 

    I think I get too sensitive.  He is a really, really nice man.  His wife is a recent BC survivor.  He truly has been wonderful. So, why did this one comment bother me?  I'm really struggling.  let it go............let it go............let it go.............

  • riley702
    riley702 Member Posts: 575
    edited June 2012

    Let it go. If he's an otherwise swell person, chalk it up to an unfortunate choice of words. I say stupid stuff even when actively trying not to! I think we're all guilty of similar slips at some point or another.

  • TigerGirl37
    TigerGirl37 Member Posts: 1
    edited June 2012

    I was misdiagnosed with mastitis prior to the correct diagnosis of IBC. For a couple weeks I had a pic line to do IV antibiotics at home and my PCP's office called to go over so information for a prior authorization. In the middle of this the nurse says "Oh my god!" so I asked what's the matter. She says "I just noticed your age. You're so young to have something so deadly!" Gee thanks, feeling much better now.

  • loriio
    loriio Member Posts: 55
    edited June 2012

    I came across this thread this morning and have been enjoying reading through it.

    I think it was Purple32 who suggested just asking "why?" when someone says or asks something stupid. I like that idea because you can change the tone based on what is being said. There is the "why" do you need to know response and there is the "why" on earth would you say that to me response.

    I haven't told very many people but most of the ones that I have told have been great. I did have a friend who offered me some extra fat for my upcoming BMX and recon. I didn't think much of it (took it for what it was-a joke). But my husband was mortified. He still talks about. Not sure why it bothered him so much.

    I met my husband's boss's wife last night and she knew from her husband. She grabbed my hand and gazed into my eyes and kept saying "how are you?". Not only was it awkward (I'm not a toucher) but she almost broke my hand!

  • bgirl
    bgirl Member Posts: 435
    edited June 2012

    I normally try to let most things go by.  I know that we are all guilty of saying the wrong thing at times, especially when we don't know what to say.  Silence is Golden, may not be far off.  Far better to listen I am learning.

    This was just classic and I am sure you ladies will get it.

    Nice weekend.  Lots of yard sales.  Walking by one and stopped.  Item I was interested in.  Lady in 60s steps up and says "buy something, you should give lots to breast cancer" (yard sale for the cure to raise money to walk in one of those big weekends).  My self edit isn`t so good lately, but I did restrain myself.  Also, daughter with me and she was mortified and did not want to make it worse.  But really I was thinking WTF.  I should give "something" to breast cancer.  How about a piece of my body and mine and my family peace of mind.  Is that enough?  Guess I look too young for BC or something.

  • shayne
    shayne Member Posts: 524
    edited June 2012

    woah.......what an assine comment.  glad u didnt dignify it with a response

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894
    edited June 2012

    Tigergirl-----Somehow something needs to be said to that chickiepoo. That falls into the column of the most stupid, thoughtless, assinine---what other adjectives? either direct or through her boss. Definitely, needs to be addressed b/c if she's said it to you , she'll say something equally stupid to someone else. Sheesh, what an analpore.

  • mebmarj
    mebmarj Member Posts: 143
    edited June 2012

    The you're so young comment. How about a well placed "you think so?" or "I thought so too." Of course you can play with the inflection and volume to convey your mood at the time.

  • riley702
    riley702 Member Posts: 575
    edited June 2012

    LOL, Jane. I did say something similar to someone urging me to sponsor her in a race for the cure. My turning her down dumbfounded her and she said something to the effect of, "You, of all people, should be happy to give." I patted my flat chest, and said, "Already did."

  • AussieSheila
    AussieSheila Member Posts: 439
    edited June 2012

    I returned to the Oncology reception desk at my local hospital after seeing my Medical Oncologist and had to wait while a middle aged receptionist did the one-fingered 'hunt

    and peck' style of typing to set up my next quarterly appointment.  It seemed to be the first keyboard she had ever seen.

    After keeping me (& DH) waiting over five minutes she finally said, "I have to sit here all day looking for egg-timers on this screen."  Of all the times for my gumption to rise, it

    did today when I answered, "I'd rather be where you're sitting than on this side of the screen.........wanna swap?"

    I'm pretty sure her face was about five shades pinker than mine by the time she made the app't and I walked away.

    Sheila.

  • nativemainer
    nativemainer Member Posts: 7,955
    edited June 2012

    Good one, Shelia!

  • shayne
    shayne Member Posts: 524
    edited June 2012

    YAY Sheila!!

  • 007_Kara
    007_Kara Member Posts: 13
    edited June 2012

    One of my all time favorites ....

    Oh, so your breast cancer is the "good" one to have?!

     Good does not = Cancer.

  • jenlee
    jenlee Member Posts: 204
    edited June 2012

    I'm waiting for a friend or relative (perhaps my mom) to ask me if I've heard about Robin Roberts or Sheryl Crowe's diagnosis and what do I think of it... As in, "aren't you worried?"

  • JulieLynn
    JulieLynn Member Posts: 86
    edited June 2012

    I didn't hear about Sheryl Crow but did hear about Robin Roberts which scares me to death.  My dad had MDS that progressed into AML and passed a year befor I was diagnosed with BC....he had had no previous history of any type of cancer or chemo.  My mom has been talking about it nonstop since Monday and I had to tell her I just can't want to talk about it anymore.  As soon as that was said, my sister called and wanted to talk about it.  UGH!!!!

  • Joanne_53
    Joanne_53 Member Posts: 714
    edited June 2012

    http://www.sacbee.com/2012/06/13/4558382/aamdsif-responds-to-robin-roberts.html

    I thought that this was rather informative --- I too am trying to find out more about it and what causes it and how to try and stop it.

    JulieLynn -- my mother died from AML at age 85 but was diagnosed with that ... who knows if she had been diagnosed early then maybe she too had MDS.  This is something that I will be asking my MO and RO about ....

  • shayne
    shayne Member Posts: 524
    edited June 2012

    I know Sheryl Crows recent announcement on having a benign brain tumor - might not be linked to her bc.  But who knows.  

  • JulieLynn
    JulieLynn Member Posts: 86
    edited June 2012

    Joanne - I had an appointment for herceptin right after I saw the news on Robin Roberts - My MO said there is a slight chance with treatment that this can develop but there is no way to predict it.  My dad was 72 with the MDS diagnosis and 73 when he passed from AML.  He had been pretty healthy before that.  The AML is just a horrible disease.  Thanks for sharing the link!

  • Truffles
    Truffles Member Posts: 1
    edited June 2012

    After my uni mastectomy, doctor running a conference I'm part of in my training program (who knows about my diagnosis) was trying to express that she doesn't support bilateral mastectomy but the way it came out was:

    "The second cancer doesn't matter. It's the first one that's going to kill you."

    Um... thanks. 

  • proudtospin
    proudtospin Member Posts: 4,671
    edited June 2012

    so that means you only die once?  that is nice to know, isn't that a james bond movie?

  • wrsmith2x
    wrsmith2x Member Posts: 127
    edited June 2012

    "I heard about your breast cancer.....they cure 99% of those now, don't they?"

  • Stormynyte
    Stormynyte Member Posts: 179
    edited June 2012

    So much for all that awareness huh. People are still clueless. I sure was up until I had no choice but to learn.

  • DeeLew84
    DeeLew84 Member Posts: 8
    edited June 2012

    I hate when people tell me I have to have a positive attitude (or worse yet, tell me to smile!). I actually believe that a positive attitude is really important but some people act like I am obligated to be positive and upbeat. I feel tired and weepy and I cannot lose that extra weight and I constantly worry about my cancer coming back. Why is it not okay for me to have an "off" day? 

  • julz4
    julz4 Member Posts: 1,373
    edited June 2012

    Dee that's so very true! Maybe it makes them feel better if we smile & are upbeat?! I know it runs through my mind 24/7....even when I sleep as it's the first thing I think of when I wake up. I'm hoping one day we can just forget for a while! Hugs Dee!