The dumbest things people have said to you/about you
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I'm sorry for your lost, julz4. I hope you have other relatives to help you go through this. That cute baby in sunglasses from your avatar must be a very importante one
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Paula, I did NOT know that about type 1 being auto-immune!!! But I DID know you don't get it by eating candy!! Stupid retired nurse. She certainly hasn't kept up on her knowledge so she should just shut her pie-hole. My sister used to be a delivery nurse 30 years ago and STILL wants to add her 2 cents into situations that she knows nothing about!! Like my breast cancer!!
sofia, assure your mom that only about 8-10% of breast cancer is hereditary!!
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I'll talk right now then I'll go to te rest--Sohia what a dope of a Dr. Maybe he was hitting on u. That wasn't just stupid, that was very unprofessional--Glad u threw it back in his face. Besides u'r Drs. will help u with meds if u talk to them and u need them. They always want to help u.
Paula another moronic person--IMG what a stupid thing to say to you. Geeze I'd hate to be a patient of her.
And Barbe I'm sorry about all this for u. It doesn't make sense to me-another words rads won't help u at all? Only rhematoid (sp) Arthritis-- so u'r stuck in this awful limbo with no help? OMG this is awful for u--I'm so so sorry.
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Goodness but the dumb comments seem to have multiplied!
Barbb, I don't remember your first post but have you tried a dif doc? I have a woman who works for me that has some form of arthrtis, she takes huge amounts of Ibuproprin and several other pain pills, She said the one that worked best for her was one they took off the market,,,forget which now. But do know she had suffered for years until someone gave her the correct diagnosis. (sorry I do not remember which type she has but help only came for her when she finally got the right doc)
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Sophia - wow - great comeback..... Sometimes we forget doctors are human, and can be morons as well.
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Sophia - Oh man, I think you may have won the award for worst thing said to you and there have been some doozies posted here. I think you should report this incompetent jerk to the licensing board.
Barbe - I hope you get some pain relief soon.
Annie
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proud, I've actually damaged my liver with Tylenol use!!! Bextra worked great for me and they took it off the market. I wonder if it's the same drug that helped her? I've been dealing with back issues for about 15 years, but now I am on a cane and off work on disability!! Come on!! I'm only 54, I should have YEARS of working still in me!! If they had done something years ago maybe I never would have gotten this bad? I've had several different types docs take a look but two surgeons have said they can't guarantee they would make me pain free. I don't care! Just EASE the pain, that would be nice. I'm used to some pain all the time, so I could handle that. THIS pain makes me gasp out loud when I stand up or move. Not conducive to a good sales transaction at work!
Don't know if I'm mentioned it here, I'm on 140 mgs of morphine a day. At least I get the good drugs. I don't get "high" at all, just some relief, but I can still feel pain if I do something like bend over. I have to lie down every 4 hours or the pain builds too high. If I don't get that lie down I am in too much pain for the meds to work. Kinda breaks up my day with 4 hours up, 2 hours down, 4 hours up.......
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Okay, here's a dumb thing but not related to breast cancer. The last surgeon I saw last week came in the room saying "Good news!" I thought he had the cure!!! Then he says "No surgery!" I cried because that meant he couldn't help me...sigh. Did I already tell you guys this? What an idiot!! Good news would be that he could do something for me....idiot.
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Barbb, gee I came close to doing damage with tylonel as I was taking it every night for 3 years for some leg pains that turned out to be a side effect of zocor/cholesterol. Finally got that worked out and not over doing it now.
Not sure what my asst took now, was it Vioxx or something? She is on layoff right now not due to health but business related. I do know her doc monitors her constantly for liver damage. She went years not knowing the cause till someone suggested a reumatologist to her
Hope you can figure out a way that will help. I just discovered a new trainer at my gym...he is trained in cancer therapy! Can you believe? He actually knew what lymphodemia was and how to help me! Wish you could find a "non-drug" solution for your pain.
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Vioxx was replaced by Bextra, then Bextra was taken off the market. Vioxx did work well. The COX-2 inhibitors were wonderful!! The two drugs were causing heart damage. I remember thinking I didn't care!!! I'd rather die of heart issues than live with the pain I was dealing with. I actually became suicidal. That's when my doc realized just how bad my pain was. I've had narcotics since. I cannot imagine ANYTHING taking this pain away!! I've tried: physio, biofeedback, accupuncture, massage, chiropractor, exercise and NOTHING touches the pain and most of those exacerbate it. I have to be medicated to funcion day-to-day. I am so used to it now. Bowel issues with "narcotic gut" are trying, but I deal with that, too. The narcotics bascially freeze my bowels so they don't do what they're supposed to do. That means even more pills....sigh. But I stay on top of it on a daily basis and don't let it go too long without a result.
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since we are talking about stupid dr's/dr's offices. I went into my PCP for a sinus infection. My nurse (if you can call her that), started asking questions. Have you had a mammo? yes ma'am. ok when? may 21st. What were the results? they came back positive. Oh that's great! At this time I'm staring at this chick with my mouth wide open in disbelief. She looks at me and says positive is good. I said in this instance positive is bad. I was positive for stage 2 breast cancer. Oh, I'm sorry, at least you didn't have to lose your breasts. I then told her well I opted for a BMX back in june. Well you couldn't have you have breasts now. Yes, I'm going through the reconstruction process at this time.
Then we get onto the subject of my medications and she couldn't say half of them. I finally just told her to turn her computer screen around so I could tell her which ones to take off. I was so irritated by the time I left.
Idiots are everywhere!
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Holy cow Chrisrenee, she just had an overflow of stupid that day. I'm amazed you didn't tell her so, I don't think I could have had that much restraint.
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Barbb, sounds like you and and my asst do the same meds, nasty. I know when Veronica comes into to work, she is like a weather barameter! She rarely complains about her pain and not sure how she handles it
Sorry there is no solution for the pain.
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What a breath of fresh air this post is and such an great venting place.
I had my radiologist come in after my mammo/ultrasound and talk fro 10 straight minutes with my husband about FOOTBALL. He continued on so long that I nearly interrupted but then felt that everything must be fine since he was so casual. WRONG! After talking about the Big 10 playoffs, he said that there were calcifications in my ducts that were a "significant concern" that could be indicative of cancer and that needed a biopsy ASAP.
In discussing my biopsy with my mother in law (who has a PHd in natural health) she told me that I needed to eat more green vegetables because studies have shown that it "dramatically reduces" cancer. Yes right, it's that easy. Just pop some extra broccoli and your cured.
Just last night in talking with my sister in law about my biopsy she ended by saying, "I just say cut em' off". WTF?????
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Shaneoak- it's so easy for someone to say "just cut'em off", until they are in our situation. It was not a decision I made lightly. My grandmother was diagnosed when she was 31 with the same form of BC I had. When I told my hubby what I was going to do, not asking him, he said that he was happy I made that decision. He could care less if I had boobs or not as long as he and the kids still had me. And if eating broccoli is a way to not have BC then I'm a goner. I don't eat/like that stuff. lol
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Shane- wow! I'm really sorry for what you're going through....it sadly, never ceases to amaze me how insensitive some people can be...grrrrr... Hang in there....I'm just a little but further ahead in all this that you but, lets hope, you won't have to do anything past the biopsy. The waiting is, IMHO, the absolute worst part! It's torture! I also have 3 kids but mine are older: 11, 13 and 15.
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Chris, maybe the receptionist was substituting for the nurse that day?
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chabba- no she is the regular nurse. Probably would have been better with the receptionist.
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I love broccoli, i eat tons of the stuff. Guess it doesn't work for everyone. Bummer.
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Here are a couple of stupid comments I got:
1. "Good thing you have extra around the middle because if you can't eat during chemo, it will help out alot."
2. My Dad has breast cancer, but a couple of years later he died from pancreatic cancer...
3. When I hadn't seen or heard from my next door neighbor since diagnosis and stopped in with a lost dog, she reach into the window, poked my affected breast and said "So, how are the boobies?"
I hope you all get a chuckle out of this. I am so happy I can stay home on my little farm and not have too much interaction with people in the general public.
Love to all warriors out there....
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Internutz~I'm afraid I might have just had to slap her! Then say FINE, HOW'S THE CHEEK???
Blessings
Paula0 -
Unless you have been through breast cancer how can these people understand the emotions/pain/side effects. i remember before my own dx, i was not able to understand how it would affect the emotions and body image. So....... i do not discuss my feelings even my best friends find it difficult to understand,. not that i harp on about it all the time. So i thankyou all so much........for being here to tell and share and support each otherxx
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"it's just a boob" I agreed with that, until I had a mast. How stupid was I.
"It's just hair, I'll grow back." I was reading the little book they gave me yesterday at my first chemo, it had all the SE on their own pages and how to deal with them. The only one that bothered me was the hair loss page. I cried.
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Stormy~The hair loss is the toughest for me too. I don't start chemo until next Friday.
Breast cancer tries to steal everything that makes us feel womanly. Our breasts, our hormones, our hair, healthy skin, even our smiles. We need to laugh in cancer's face! He's temporary! As difficult as hair loss is...it will grow back, prettier than ever!
We will be stronger, smarter, and more beautiful than we ever were!!!
Blessings
Paula0 -
Worst thing I've heard yet, I heard today at my local cancer support group.
We were having our end of year break-up, eight women and one man. Five of the women are BC survivors. 75 yr old man has been treated by himself for Prostate cancer.
He has all the answers and the Drs are all rip-off merchants! His wife dropped by to pick him up half way through and sat outside to wait.
When we broke up the meeting for afternoon tea, one of the ladies asked him if his wife would like to come in and share the lovely food with us.
"I don't think so, she's a bit depressed because she was told she had Breast Cancer today!" he replied.
WTF!! Grrrrrrrrrrr!
We brought her in and she was quite happy to join us, but the DH fobbed her off to the end of the table where she was warmly welcomed by some friendly strangers.
I hope he doesn't take over her medical treatment, because she will be eating grass from her DH's horse paddock in the near future.
Sheila.
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Internutz - I cannot believe that your neighbor did that. Bad enough what she said but to poke you - I gasped when I read that.
Sheila, you may want to speak with that poor wife about getting support away from her husband if possible. And refer her to this site. What a buffoon her husband sounds like.
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I think Annie, that she is 'managed' by the bully, as she is an asian woman.
We have a species of men down here who can't deal with a woman who is their equal so, after a few failed relationships with their own country women, they go to very poor countries like the Philipines and choose one they can control. They marry them and bring them back here away from their families and any sort of support system a family would provide.
Most of these men are quite a bit older than the women they choose and I've often seen them at the supermarket checkout where the wife doesn't even get to handle the money and the DH's pay for the groceries. I'm not so sure that the women get the best out of the deal. I'm sure they would go home if they could raise the money.
The funny thing is, because of this bullying attitude there are actually support groups for these women all over the country.
Sheila.
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Sheila, they do that here in Canada too!! The men are older, uglier and meaner, too!!
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They do that here too but some of the Fillipina's give them a shock when they get to the USA. Sometimes they connect with the Fillipino community groups where they meet strong women, usually well educated, who teach them to stand up for themselves.
I worked with one of those beastly men who went to the Philipines and brought back one of those "controllable brides." We also had a number of Fillipinos whose wives took her in hand and helped her adjust and stand up for herself. It was quite a shock to him.
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Barb--I wish u could get help somewhere for u'r back--that is knocking every piece of strength out of u. I feel so bad for u.
OK I don't remember who said what cuz I play catch so I'll just say what I remember.
That nurse was hysterical how old was she? I realize they don't need to know specifics, but u'd think in being general she's know something.
Aussie that poor woman is going to go thru chemo and whatever else all alone and still take care of her ailing husband, cuz he's going to be much sicker than she is --of course.
And Paula I loved u'r answer to internuts--new names to me--LOL
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