thread for middle age to older Christian women.
Comments
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hey everyone:
jo/barbe: what forum is that losing weight thread under? i keep reading that some people lose weight & others gain weight during chemo, so thought i'd better ask because my early Christmas wish list includes losing mucho weight before treatments begin next month!!
if gaining weight is part of the chemo trip, then the old clothes i wear now will be even older and not even wearable!!! and, i know i absolutely won't feel like going out on the shopping trip excursion. what's a bc girl in treatment to do??laurie: your situation is lovingly placed in the prayer box! call on our Father God to settle and calm your anxiety/regret about things....He never fails. jo is right....your immediate dh/family needs you.
indomitable: are u feeling better? got rid of that cough yet?
patoo: I do appreciate your comments and kind words!! hope u r doing ok---
all: i'm lazy on the keystrokes...so, don't take offense at me shortening my words, not to mention that i rarely capitalize words....have u noticed?!
have a great eveningdeb
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has anyone read the book, 'Dear God, They Say Its Cancer' ?? by janet thompson.
what about the following:
'Dont Bet Against Me: Beating the Oddes Against BC
Breast Cancer Be-Attitudes: Embracing God's Thoughts
Uplift: Secrets from the Sisterhood of BC Survivors
Chicken Soup for the Soul: Healthy Living Series
deb
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Hi all - glad to see us encouraging one another. I'm making progress in my goal of walking 500 miles in a year. Have done 102 miles since I started chemo 10 weeks ago. Keeping track of it in my sig line keeps me motivated. Have managed to not gain or lose much with chemo and I think walking a little every day really helps. Plus it gives me early-morning time to comtemplate and pray.
I have been thinking on the red winged blackbirds that come out in the spring here. These tiny birds singing bravely with outstretched wings at the side of the road, little specks of life in the vast world of cars and trucks and rainstorms and not enough jucy bugs to eat and whatever else comes their way, but still blithely singing their thanks and joy to be alive and trusting that it'll be OK in the end. I want to be more like that.
Hugs and prayers to all with special prayers for {{laurie}} for your family and {{Sheila}} for your church home and {{Sherry/spar2}} for your health.
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Groundhog, so glad to hear you are walking while going thru your chemo. I admire you and your effort. I, too, go home everyday and admire God's handiwork. I live on a small lake and put two birdfeeders at both ends - in the water so the squirrels can't get them. I have red winged black birds, cardinals and just about everything else. We have sand hill cranes here too. I love the big birds. As I've aged, I've learned that the simple things are the best things. God's miracle sometimes is the simple things.
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That's beautiful JO. Thanks for sharing. I was able to read it at work and it calms my soul.
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hey ladies, u all inspire me so much! since be4 bc i am not in a physical church. i also found myself in a toxic one. am re-reading A Shepard Looks At Psalm 23 by Phillip Keller..it brings me great comfort. i don't usually even talk about my faith on line, itt's 2 personal 2 me, but u ladies r sooo open! i am very much on this site, unseen much love and respect 4 u all...light and love (His) 3jaysmom
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3jaysmom
I too, do not attend a physical church. I've seen so much toxicity which is NOT what God wants. My husband is a minister/chaplain. We have church together very often discussing everything. Interesting, the best sermon I ever heard was from a female minister/chaplain @ the rehab center where our boys were. She minces no words because she knows what they are dealing with is a spirtiual battle as much as a physical one. She often would say, everyone will reach their mid-night hour. When they do, who will be there for them? and it better be a God that will be solid enough to hold on during the struggles of life. Both my boys gave their lives back to Christ there and continue to serve him. They sponsor many people in young peoples AA.
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I get the MRI on June 3rd and see the ortho surgeon on the 18th. My hip/back does NOT hurt today??? Why not???? It's so frustrating.
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hello to all again--been a few days since i was on the thread & you may not remember me !
just wanted to say that i always enjoy reading your messages and your little 'pick me up's...like and especially when references are made to God, the most recent being a beautiful one from Jo.
laurie: how's your out of state family/their illnesses? have u come to peace w/remaining at home under ur circumstances? i pray that u have.
mary: how long has ur husband been a minister/chaplain? my dad was a minister my entire life and i'm so thankful that i was brought up in a Christian home under the headship of a God who loves us and understands our burdens, such as this bc disease. i call it the 'beast'. In this situation, i believe it is a physical beast and the spiritual beast that all of us battle with is one that cannot be overcome by any medical intervention. It's a wonderful testimony that your sons belong to the Lord and that they serve Him.
3jaysmom: i have the same book by Philip Keller! Isn't it great!! I have just recently re-read it, too and found some things in it that i didn't catch the 1st time around that really spoke to me. i believe it is a powerful example of our Good Shepherd, spoken from a master shepherd himself. It is truly one of the best books i've read.....simple laymen's language but with awesome spiritual insight and application. i'm so glad to know someone else who has read it too.
i do understand about being reserved about one's faith when just putting it out there in front of everyone when people unknown to you might take offense. Talking about 'faith based issues' is not 'accepted' easily by our society---
My belief and faithin God the Father and His Son is the only true source of my very existence//my life. By accepting Christ as my Savior, I know I will live an eternal life with Him in heaven----i want others to know the same thing.
Mary: thanks for sharing about the birds and all those 'little things' that are God handiwork.
i've not addressed everyone else that recently posted, but, know that i am praying for you and for all of us as we go through the day(s) in sickness and good health that God has ordained for each of us.
Deb
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dsa - we remember our sisters-in-Christ and though we may not always call each one by name, know that you are prayed for often.
Thanks for the heads-up on the book. Will make a trip this weekend to get a copy. There is a thread somewhere on this site where people have shared books they recommend. My all-time favorite is The Shack by William P Young. Great book.
Night all.
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Deb, I bought the 'Uplift: Secrets from the Sisterhood of BC Survivors' book after my diagnosis and it was full of good ideas from women who had been there, done that. I also loved the way it was laid out in chapters with related topics, you can read the section that applies to what you are going through at that time. It is a good resource book for someone going through bc.
Sheila
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deb, and all my dear sisters,
i am feeling more at peace with my family being ill, and knowing we should stay here at home.
my dad is somewhat better, my oldest brother went out to see him, and my dad was very cruel to him. it touched me because me and randy would have faced the same thing had we went out. i hope to talk with my brother this week and encourage him, as you all have with me.
i am sure you have all heard of this saying, but it is so true, WHEN WE ARE DOWN TO NOTHING GOD IS UP TO SOMETHING.
God bless, dear friends, love and hugs, laurie
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Patoo, I too love the Shack. This has been one of the best books I've ever read. I keep copies just to give them out.
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Jo how beautiful and uplifting, how do i get day spring ?
have a blessed day in the Lord.
laurie
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Jo--love those devotional type examples that stir our hearts and spirit and move us closer to God. thank you for sharing them.
Sheila: thanks for the 2nd recommendation about the Sisterhood book. Am getting this weekend.
Patoo/Mary: Am also going to look for the book both of you spoke of: The Shack. Look forward to reading it!
Laurie: it's unfortunate about what your brother faced. I do hope you get to speak with him and offer encouragement. I lost my dear younger brother 3 years ago at the age of 46 to a massive heart attack. He was my only sibling and i have found it to be one of the most sad events of my life, if not the saddest. We grown up to believe that our parents will die 1st because it seems to be the natural course of events. but we know that in many families that is not the case. my heart breaks that he is gone and i miss him terribly....and, yet there's a rejoicing of heart because he's with the Lord (and my dad) and I know I'll see them again in glory. Speaking personally, the physical loss is wrenching, but if it was a physcial loss that had no promise of reunion in heaven, I would be devastated. I hope you and your brother will encourage one another.
I pray that we all have a restful weekend, honoring our Lord in worship while also remembering those who served in the armed forces in days & years past, and those that are currently serving, too.
May you be blessed this weekend with family surrounding you, love generously extended and smiles shared by all.
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I remember when my Dad was dying that he got really cruel too. He introduced me to his new day nurse as "my daughter, the mouth". That really hurt. But I figured he was doing the "separation" thing....making us almost glad to see him go! It's pretty common for dying people to be cruel, to begin to break away from family and pull away emotionally. Whether it is for their sake or ours, who knows.....
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Hey all - just wanted to pop in and say FYI - I've taken a new screen name to reflect where I live (Wisconsin) not when I had breast cancer surgery (Groundhog Day). Hope you're all well {{hugs}}
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Jo, I love the worry vs. wonder....and the ping-pong ball analogy. I WISH I had an answer. Lately, I've had a LOT to worry/wonder about. I have been awake at all hours during the night. I would give my concerns to God....all of which concerned my three children, their school schedules, their lives, etc.....I finally knew that the lack of sleep was more than my body could handle. I knew there was nothing more I could physically do about any of it. I had exhausted absolutely everything I could humanly do.
I told my kids - especially my daughter who was also worried, that I didn't know what we were going to do about things, but that God had gotten us into this, and He was just going to have to get us out of it. I didnt' know how/why/where, etc....
(basically...what the scoop is...I have to work part-time. We homeschool kids #2 and 3 part-time, but they take two classes each at public school. Kid #2 will be a senior. She needs Latin IV and orchestra next year, which will be periods 3 and 7. She will be principal cello. This schedule is not doable. I teach part-time in elementary school. Kid #3 is in middle school, taking science and orchestra. Currently, I can't get him to school at his time. They were going to change the start times to all three schools - elementary, middle, high - and it would make it IMPOSSIBLE for us to continue doing this. We were truly in a pickle. I HAVE to work. We feel it is God's leading to homeschool the kids. They NEED orchestra, as we can not duplicate this anywhere else. She can NOT get 4th yr. Latin any other way, and we have checked out numerous things. AND on top of all this, kid #1 doesn't want to return to Christian college he went to....yet, he's done nothing to pursue anything else...more on that later.)
- Anyway, I just told God I knew I could do no more. And told Him I knew miracles had to happen. The next thing I knew, the start times of all three schools were changed AGAIN...this time it's compatible...AND the Latin teacher told my daughter she's going to see if she can get the Latin class changed to 6th period!!
- AND as for my oldest son - he had gone into a major depression at college after my BC dx, and started missing assignments, etc...his grades dropped....but I got him back on track. We thought he was going to lose his National Merit Scholarship. HOWEVER - another miracle - they made the GPA qualification different just two weeks before school was out, and our son qualified!!!! Another answer to prayer...and as if that weren't enough....because financially, we still couldn't afford to send him back to the Christian college - because the Pell Grant qualifications were changed, we now qualify for that, which qualifies us for another grant....AND we just found out yesterday that our church's scholarship for kids going to christian colleges is NOT just for the freshman year, it's for EVERY year, and the school matches that....
I keep telling my son that these are miracles and God is showing him he needs to return to this school. In a matter of one month, $11,100 has been provided to us for his college...that we were not expecting! (it costs $28,000+ for the year). Because he is being so adament about not returning, and because he has earned academic scholarships, we are not asking him to put out any $ himself...we will pay off his loans, as we feel this is doable. Between God's miracles and our meager savings, we can provide this christian ed. for him......however, if he chooses to go the other route, he is on his own. (at this point, he hasnt' even been accepted at the state university...things aren't progressing. He doesn't "get" it, that God seems to be opening and closing the doors for him....he has turned his back on the Lord right now, and is struggling majorly in this area, despite having been "trained in the way he should go"...)
Oh, my....Ever since I just *really* let go, we have seen all kinds of miracles...it's been absolutely amazing. I've been sleeping better. I am still having daily headaches, though...but that's partly due to the pollens. And the financial miracles have been so humbling and overwhelming to us. We also needed to get our oldest son "officially" diagnosed for aspergers (high functioning form of autism)....it was not going to be covered by insurance, and God provided yet ANOTHER miracle......would you believe the IRS found a deduction /credit we hadn't taken???? That covered the cost of the psychiatrist!!!! We felt this was a sign that we were truly doing the right thing.
Oh, my...I have written WAY too much....but I am so overwhelmed by God's goodness right now...and your worry vs wondering note really tugged at my heart, because I struggle with that. I always have. I do. Cast your cares on Him, we're told in Peter.....but it's so much easier said than done. Some issues are big; some are small.
I realize that my issues to some of you may not seem like any big deal, but to us, they are our mountains at the moment. And they are significant. There are other things going on in our lives, too, naturally....my kids' hearts just arent' in the right places. Not at all. Despite having grown up in a Christian home, having Christian parents, g'parents, relatives, etc....
I apologize again for the length of this.....but if this is encouraging to anyone at all, and I pray that it is, then it will not have been for nothing. I give God ALL the honor, glory, and praise....
You know, the other thing, too.....we've always been tithers....for ever and always. Ever since I got my first allowance as a five year old, when I got a dime a week! I gave my one penny every week. However, a couple of months ago, I felt compelled to start giving even more. I remember telling God....HOW??? I'm paying off my BS, the hospital, the other doctors....my medical bills are outrageous.....how in the world can I do that???? But I did....I started getting even more generous to other things..... And then, you know what? It was like the heavens opened...and that's when all this stuff started happening......amazing. truly. I never expected it. Certainly that's not why I did it. Not saying it will happen to others.
I'm blessed with great health....no boobs....ha! But great health......Blessings and love and prayers to each one of you....you're in my thoughts and prayers daily, even when I don't write on here.....robin
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Robin, WOW! Many times I only skim over very long posts but yours kept my attention. We serve an AWESOME GOD and your testimony shows that we only have to give it to Him and He will deliver. Hold on to that where your children are concerned as well. They may stray but in the end the Lord's will won't return void.
Thanks for sharing.
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A great testament Robin!!
JO, one lonely night on the boards here, while I was up and worrying, someone wrote to me "Let God take the helm". Ever since then it's like the waters quieted and I finally let go. It is so freeing. Now I think of it as "caring" rather than "worrying". I have concerns, rather than worries.
So JO, let God take the helm.
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Barbe, that's great. Something we all, not just JO, need to hear and do.
(edit to correct typo)
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Jo, you are so right--we are mortals living in a mortal body. Blesings at the dentist.
Something the Lord has really tried to impress on me lately is "Be still and know that I am God." I consider the "being still" is my mind, thoughts, plans that I get wrapped up in and forget that God knows it all and has the perfect plan. I need to LET GO and LET GOD more often. I am practicing the "being still" part today at work. My stress level is a "perceived stress" level. God would see that real differently than me. Help me to see what you see, oh Lord.
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I am so blessed when I come to this thread and read the beautiful tributes to the Father God we serve and love. The Lord directs our paths at all times and I am thankful that He directed me to you ladies! It was an unexpected love gift from Him and each time I read your postings I see the beauty of His love shining through you.
Jo: I totally agree with you about the Armour of God and that each piece is ours for daily use to shield ourselves from the arrows of our Destroyer. This BC is an oppressor with a serious SE if we are not constantly in His Word to remind us that He is our refuge and safe haven of rest away from the oppression that seeks to overcome us.
Mary: i have a little stained glass 'pretty' that actually says 'LET GO AND LET GOD'---I see its reminder each day it in all of its reflection hanging in the window.
Robin/Barbe: I agree that 'worrying' is so easy for us to do and i find that it is one of my weaknesses. we are told in scripture that worrying is evidence of not trusting God. as much as i want to deny that is my problem, i am ashamed by the reality that I so easily fall prey to that weakness. I find that must ask forgiveness throughout the day!
Robin: sometimes just 'putting it out there' is what is helpful for all of us. it's almost like a free counseling session! aren't we grateful that there are threads like this among a group of women that can be honest not only about our BC demise, but about HOW our BC affects our daily lives. God has ordained all things and this thread and the women that speak so lovingly about the Lord and encouragingly to one another is a reflection of the gifts of His love that He bestows on us. And, by the way, I work in a Financial Aid/Scholarship office at a large public university in its Enrollment Management Division, so i totally understand about the importance of your son's NM scholarship and the addt'l PELL grant fund eligibility. let me know if i can help about anything. And, congratulations to your son for being recognized for his academic achievements by being awarded his NM award.
Patoo: where are you?!
Have a blessed day tomorrow!
deb
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hi family,
thank you dsa, and all my bc sisters for sharing what an inspiration.
we are having lots of rain and wind, but i am so thankful. i know so many parts of our
america are in such disarray, oil spill, torando's and such. i pray for them and for all of us to be the light that God so wanted us to be.
hugs, and love to all.
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dsa, never far away - sometimes I just lurk and bask in the thoughts and posts and let them encourage my spirit.
ibmt, I agree that our courntry is in a bad place. I pray that we will turn around and look back to the morality that once made this nation so great. We are on a dangerous path and I'm really afraid for our future generations. Continue to pray for enlightenment to leave the "I" mentality.
Blessings.
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Hi Ladies! I found this thread from reading dsa's profile. I have been on the June chemo forum and was reading the profiles of the women having the same chemo as I will be having. (ac)
I'm 45 (46 next month!), and had a lmx on May 24th. I wil be starting chemo probably on the 14th of June. I have been married almost 26 years and have 3 daughters, 25, 22, and 18. The older 2 are married to wonderful Christian men, and my oldest has given me a beautiful grandson, who is now 8 months old. My youngest is graduating from high school and going to Forerunner Music Academy in KC for music ministry. Forerunner is part of the Int'l House of Prayer (IHOP). I'm so proud of her! She gave up all her grandiose plans to be a archeologist or anthropologist or whatever and decided to follow God wherever He leads her. She is a singer and I always felt her voice was a gift from God, and she should use it for Him.
Last year I went through treament (chemo and rads) for stage 3b colon cancer. I was sure I learned everything God could teach me, so was surprised when I was dx with bc!
I am nervous about this chemo--DON"T want to lose my hair! God was so good to me last year. He really got me through the rough days. Whenever there was an important family event (daughter's wedding, or birth of grandson) God always made sure I felt ok. Sometimes I would get frustrated that my chemo was delayed for one reason or another, then I would realize it was all God's perfect plan for me! So watch for the ways He will help you out too! Write them down--remember them!
I was so blessed by reading some of your stories here. Thank you ladies for sharing! If any of you like to read blogs, my site is on my profile. I have a tab at the top with a list of Bible verses that have helped me through. If you don't see your fave on there, please leave me a comment with it and I'll include it! If you have blogs, I would love to read them. You can pm me or comment on my blog if you want to share.
Btw, my church did a wonderful series on "fearless living" a while back that really helped me a lot. You can find it at this link, if you are interested: www.bridgewoodcc.org
love and blessings,
Tina
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Ladies, I have got to tell you....God is so good. (well, yes, of course, you already knew that!!). But, this past weekend, I attended a breast cancer survivors' retreat sponsored by two different organizations that was funded by a grant given by the Komen foundation. As it turned out - not by coincindence, of course - the leader was a Christian, but also were the 14 people who were signed up for this retreat. It was NOT a Christian retreat. Everyone was in a different place in their walk, but everyone had a faith in God and some sort of a witness and belief. It truly was ordained by the Lord.
After I left after the 36 hours of being together, I felt I had been on a spritual retreat as much as anything....it was one of the most wonderful things I have ever done in my life. And to be in a room with all survivors - in all kinds of stages - was such a blessing.
PLS do pray for a new friend - her name is Angela. She was first dx at age 27 with bc. Now, at age 35, she has mets to her lungs, liver, spine, and bones. She has a 17, 15, 12, and 9 y.o. They had moved away, in between her two diagnoses, and had HORRIBLE doctors in the new place. So they sacrificed literally everything to move back to be with better doctors, and ended up homeless - in a shelter - so she could have her old doctors back. Her attitude and personality are fabulous. Her faith is strong. She is one in a million. I just love her to pieces. She is an Angel, even though her name is Angela. Please do keep her in your prayers. (We did find out last night, that her family has just found housing - but now they are in need of absolutely everything. She also gets chemo every week, because her cancer is everywhere...)
Thanks ladies...I love you: I trust your hearts, your spirits and your relationships with the Lord
blessings...robin
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oops...forgot that
doesn't work on here...it's supposed to be a heart....
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Robin, what a beautiful story and I will pray for Angela. I'm going to ask you ladies to pray for a friend of mine. About 5 years ago when my middle son was in rehab for alcohol and drugs, there was a wonderful couple there. The guy was an alcoholic. I say was, because he could not stay sober and died last night. His precisous wife, Tammy, who is a believer, is devastated. Please pray for Tammy to be comforted by the Holy Spirit. Cancer is a horrible disease, but so is addiction. It is unfair and it can stike almost anyone.
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Will definitely pray for Tammy....how heartbreaking....will add her to my prayer list.
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