thread for middle age to older Christian women.
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I just wanted everyone to know that I emailed Sue's pastor this evening and asked him how the service went. I told him how much of a comfort it was for us to know that he was there when she passed and that he was there when she needed him. I told him my intent of sending Sue's mom our posts. I wanted to know if her mom had any physical limitations or other challenges because I would like to meet her. I know this pastor is very busy so he may not have a chance to get back to me for a while. I'll let you know when I hear from him. I need a big chunk of time to get the posts presentable to send to her. For some reason the fonts weren't even the same from post to post. I am not sure how that happened but those kind of things I want to fix before sending to her.
Have a restful night.
Love,
Nancy
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Nancy, so awesome that you are here to keep the post going and checking in on us during our down days. Although I may not post I do read during my down days just to stay in touch with each of you. You are right at times the after chemo effect hits pretty hard. Thank you for being an encourager and a blessing to each of us.
Your Sister in Christ,
Angie
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Ok, here goes a bit of a long story. First, I got my last A/C yesterday! So grateful that leg of the journey is done. The powers of the dark side threw everything at me to keep me from finishing. Trouble accessing a vein, then strong courageous Jean became a blubbering terrified mess. I must have scared the nurses because my chemo doc's social worker appeared then the doctor herself. I finally settled down and let the nurses do what they had to do. So A/C is finished. Hallelulia! I also had a sono of my heart that showed no damage from the chemo. I will be getting a port before my second Taxol due to start in 2 weeks along with herceptin / perjeta every 3 weeks for a year. No more vein melt downs and since it looks like surgery to take more nodes is on the agenda for after chemo they won't need to use that arm for any IV''s .. this should help lessen lymphedema risks. Wow this battle is a lot harder than I thought but Jesus is going to win. Cancer doesn't stand a chance against my great physician ladies. It is already done. Fight on fellow warriors. Love, Jean
BTW, Congradulations Mags. Woohoo
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Well, congratulations to you, too, Jean! I'm pretty sure the A/C is the worst part! I had taxotere as well and that has its own SEs. It affects the tear ducts, so leaky eyes. Also, runny nose, which seems to be worse while I'm eating, so can be embarrassing at a dinner with others. Always wiping the nose. So imagine when DH took cousin & me to dinner at Red Lobster – the only time I've worn my wig in public – sitting there trying to enjoy the meal but constantly tugging at the wig and wiping my nose...
Nancy, losing my hair was really not a big deal for me; on the 18th day after first chemo, I ran my hand through my hair and a big clump fell out. I called my dear hairdresser (he is my friend T's brother) and he cleared his salon on a Saturday morning to shave me. DH took pictures, and my hairdresser's wife came and loved on me and hugged me. I have to say that it really doesn't bother me any more, it's certain a lot easier to take care of, no shampoo, gel, blow dry, curling iron, hairspray, fussing, and with the low energy it's nice to have a 5 minute shower. Even with a shower chair I'm still exhausted afterwards. Oh, and bonus – no shaving!
Angie, thank you for your kind words on my picture, I will post it here for the others to see. My first thought was, I look like my mother – when she was 80! But I was wearing one of the scarves T brought me a few weeks ago and an old shirt I love went with it well.
My oncologist has ordered a lung function test as he can't find any reason for the shortness of breath. It's scheduled for this afternoon. So my cousin will drive me to the cancer center for my Neulasta shot then all the way to the other side of town for the test. What would I ever do without her? My angel.
You are all in my prayers – though sometimes I fall asleep in the middle of praying, God knows my intentions. So thankful for you all, and for the love of Jesus that binds our hearts together.
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I am grateful for finishing my first course of chemo today. Also for a good ultrasound report that chemo is not damaging my heart. Prayed for God to remove all disappointment about not having church leadership and friends be supportive in this cancer trial and within 2 days one friend presented me with a hand crochet prayer shawl that she prayed over while making it, my pastor who is not at all the,warm fuzzy type actually hugged me in church and another pastor came up to us,to ask how hubby and I were doing, a man from my CR group called to ask how I am managing. When I finally gave up trying to grasp frantically for the support I needed, God stepped in and provided much more than I ever expected. Love, Jean
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Mags, you are just beautiful! What a lovely smile...congrats on what you have accomplished.
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DAY # 33 OF 50 DAYS OF GRATITUDE
I am grateful for the promises the Lord gave me before my dx but when I knew things were not right with my mammogram and ultrasound. I am not one of these people who always hears messages from the Lord but I knew in my heart this was the Lord. The first message came through loud and clear (figuratively speaking). He said I will never leave you or forsake you. I knew the instant I heard this message in my heart that my wishes for no cancer were not going to happen. He was preparing me for what was to come. The next day (I think) but again before I got the diagnosis I got another message. "Wait and see what I am about to do for you. " I am constantly amazed at how the Lord has brought these messages into reality in my life and continues to do so. I told my neighbor who is a Christian about this and she said I think your second message is going to be an ongoing thing. I agree and that has proven to be true.
Jean, I read your post this morning and it brought tears to my eyes. You are realizing just how strong you are in the Lord and how He does meet our needs. PTL Also congrats to finishing your A/C treatments.
Mags, I saw your beautiful picture on the chemo thread and I am so glad you posted it here. Your beautiful smile could light up a room. That is the Jesus shining through you. You are beautiful inside and out. Prayers for you dear one, for the docs to get to the bottom of your breathing issues.
Thanks Angie for your kind words.
I am off to my MO apt today too.
Love you all,
Nancy
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Hello ladies, just checking in so that you know I am not in any real trouble at the moment.
My tumour markers are down so the cancer is in remission, but I have now kicked up a rumpus with the orthopaedic doctors as I have been limping since last year (shortly after they found the tumour in my femur), and this year have suffered a lot of pain in my leg. My oncologist referred me to the orthopaedic surgeon at my local hospital but thinks that there is not much that can be done because I apparently have a hole in the femur where the radiotherapy blasted the tumour away. Meanwhile, my GP has written to the radiotherapy hospital, also the hospital where the operation to put a rod in the femur took place, because she is determined that something should be done. She told me that it may not be possible to sort out the limp, but I should not be suffering with this pain. I have an appt on 28th with one of the orthopaedic surgeons, I hope that they don't start passing the buck between the different hospitals. It is such a pain in the neck the way that the health service is run over here, instead of getting one hospital to deal with as many issues as possible they send you all over the country to different "centres of excellence". I have to remember the The Lord is in control, and everything will run to His plan and in His timing.
I have difficulty keeping up with everything that is happening on this thread. I have decided now to just sit in bed at night with my laptop beside me, and read each individual post and pray for you all that way. It is a sign of the success of this thread that there are so many of us who regularly look in and like to keep up with what is going on. Please be assured that you are all in my prayers,
Love Debbie
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Hi Debbie,
I am getting ready to go to an oncologist apt but I will say briefly that I am first glad that you posted. You are still in my thinking and praying. I am sorry you are having to endure a lot of pain. That is really hard to deal with I know. I sure hope that something can be done and someone will take responsibility for your situation. I injured my rotator cuff during a breast ultrasound. I know it just seems like we get hit with one thing and then it has a domino effect. I will sure be praying into this pain situation. PTL that you are in remission. That is GREAT news!
Love
Nancy
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Ladies, thank you so much for your kind words. I looked at that picture and saw my mother's face – at age 80... She was beautiful even then, though, so I don't mind.
Nancy, I agree with your neighbor. He is and will continue to do great things in and with your life.
Debbie, so glad to see you post, and so sad that you are in such pain. You have been in my prayers though I didn't know anything specific to pray for, but now I do and will pray that it will ease, or that if not, Jesus will be holding your hand through it. Hang on to him, dear sister. He loves you so much.
I have just gotten home from my lung function test, feeling really drained but shaky from the chemo steroids and the albuterol breathing treatment they gave me toward the end of the tests. We should have an answer by Thursday, it will be read by a pulmonologist then sent on to my oncologist. I talked to my nurse friend this morning, she also has lung issues, she's wondering if I might have a thickening of the walls of the lungs, that can cause the kind of symptoms I've been having. We shall see.
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Mags, I will certainly be praying for something easily treatable with your possible lung situation. I am glad that losing your hair was not a big deal for you. You are a brave woman. I am freaking out that my hair seems to be thinning!
I had an amazing thing that happened today. I knew I would get to see the ladies at the front desk in the radiation dept as I pass there office going to my MO office. I had told these ladies about seeing the swans on my last follow up with my RO. I took one of my small prints to show them the swan family. I told them also that I mentioned the radiation team in my interview but unfortunately they edited that out. I had NO intention of showing this picture to my MO.
I had issues with him in the summer and was thinking about switching and looked into another MO at the clinic. I never felt led to change though. I opened up my computer one day and was ready to email my nurse navigator about him and my desire to switch but I never could do it. Something was holding me back.
So I am in the office with my MO and the good news is that I feel like my body has adapted to the cancer drug and that he thinks the worst is over. As he was examining me the Lord popped this into my head out of nowhere. I said I read somewhere that you are into photography. I said is that the case. He lit up and said yes, but didn't have a lot of time for it at present. I told him about my swan family and told him about winning the photo of the month with the newspaper. I said I have it here if you have time to see it. He said yes I would like to see it. He looked at it much longer than I would have expected studying it carefully. I told him I think the swans are gone and I was sad about that. Anyway this office visit was really crucial to me and my decision to either move on to another MO or stay with him. I just felt very positive about the office call and I really give God the glory because I had not even given it a thought about him being into photography. I read that on the internet months ago and had completely forgot about it.
I was so happy about the way the visit went and I feel like today is officially the first day of my life getting back on track. I am thrilled with that.
On my way out I ran into the only radiation tech who was not there on my last day. We talked for a bit and it was just a really nice closure to all of this.
I hope you all had a good day. Lucy, anxious to here how things went yesterday. When I realize how far you have to travel for your treatments I feel very spoiled that all of my cancer team is within a half hour from my house.
Love you all,
Nancy
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I just wanted to say thank you to the ladies who have prayed for my pain to be eased. I have been out today and have not suffered any pain whatsoever - God is so merciful!
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Debbie, that is wonderful news. I have been praying quite a bit for you. PTL
Love
Nancy
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DAY #34 OF 50 DAYS OF GRATITUDE
I am grateful today for the ability to walk for exercise. Walking used to be my main form of exercising until I developed heel spurs and plantar fasciitis. I donated my treadmill to the church and that was the end of my walking. It was not until my bc dx that I discovered that I can walk now. I wasn't able to swim during most of my post surgery and treatments and the Lord gave me back the ability to walk. I know that walking is something I used to take for granted but not anymore.
As I was walking today on this beautiful fall day I prayed for all of you and for the family members that are not Christians if you have made that known. Who does Howard belong to? Someone asked that this person be added to the list of Dave and Davids and I can't remember who that person belongs to without going back and reading a bunch of posts. I was thinking possibly Polly or Jean. If you read this please let me know. Thanks.
I hope everyone is doing well and having minimal side effects today.
Love you all,
Nancy
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He's not mine Nancy!!!! Thank you for thinking of that
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Nancy, Howard is my husband's brother. They were estranged for many years and reconnected a few years ago. He is planning on moving back east in the spring to be near us. He is searching.
Today I am grateful for feeling well after the A/C on Monday. I am grateful for a phone call from the chaplin at the breast center at Sloan Kettering calling to see if I was ok after my meltdown during my chemo on Monday. What a lovely lady. She asked if she could call next week again to pray with me. I am also grateful for having the energy to go to a breast cancer support group tonight. Met some very brave women there. Love, Jean
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I'm with you, Jean - hearing other ladies' stories is so humbling. At our Bible study today, a lady with really short hair said "I'm not wearing my hat today....first time....and this is the third time I've lost all my hair." Whew! As she said (and we know), losing your hair and seeing your bald head in the mirror makes you the face of cancer. I never felt sick - till I saw myself in the mirror .....well, almost never!
God is so good, though.....no matter how we look on the outside or feel on the inside, He's there as our Strength and Power. Thank you, Lord!
love you, warriors! Bev
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Bev, I know what you mean about the hair. I used to have a thick mane of hair, now I have a scalp full of tiny bristles. I have noticed that if I rub my scalp too much it takes the bristles off, so I am now being as careful as possible to allow the bristles to grow. I want to go back to work in December, and am desperately hoping that I have a decent head covering by then. I remember back in the summer, when the chemo was doing its worst, that I looked in the bathroom mirror and thought that if I wore a polo neck sweater then my head would look like a boiled egg! It is so unfair that as well as losing the hair we lose eyelashes, also the eyebrows which add expression to our faces.
Love Debbie
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Hi ladies,
I was just reading about cold cap therapy for chemo patients so they don't lose their hair. There are apparently only two facilities in Illinois that offer this. I know it is not going to help any of you who have already lost your hair but it might be a viable option for others. If you google this there is info out there. It is apparently not for everyone but I don't know much more than that.
Also just a heads up. I know that there are at least three of you on this thread who have either by yourself or someone else writing posted your complete name. I was reading a few days ago on another thread about this BCO forum being studied without our knowledge. Of course you probably know that anyone out there can forage through these threads without becoming a member. As we all know for our search for Sue just what can be found out about any one of you with enough information. I would suggest that you delete your last names. Lucy I already have your post printed regarding Sue. I would suggest you deleting your last name on that.
Love,
Nancy
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DAY #35 OF 50 DAYS OF GRATITUDE
I am grateful for the BCO forum. It has been a place of connecting with others. It has been an amazing online support system for thousands and thousands of women and men. It is a place for caregivers to go for answers and help. It has been a remarkable source of information. It is a place of sharing interests. For us it has been an amazing source of strength to reach out to other Christian woman across the country and the world. To be able to share our concerns and joys with people that most of us have never met before is a true gift and privilege. For those of you who have met in person a real joy to attach a real person to a username. I have been asked if I wanted to join a support group and I didn't because I consider this forum as my support group. Yes, it is true that I can't feel a hug or hold a hand but I can feel the love and caring. So thank you BCO for being there for all of us.
This is almost our last two weeks of gratitude. Let's bombard this thread with our praises and thankfulness. Then it will be approximately three weeks going into Thanksgiving. I recently saw an article on happiness. This was the world's view but part of the formula was an attitude of gratitude. The Bible tells us that the joy of the Lord is our strength. I believe that with all my heart. Also a merry heart doeth good like a medicine. I believe that scripture as well.
Have a wonderful day you dear ones.
Love to all,
Nancy
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I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, 19 and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, 21 far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. Eph. 1: 18-21
This is my prayer for all of you today.
Love,Nancy
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Sorry to be late in posting my gratitude. I was up last night with a uti. Today I am grateful for getting in to see a local gyn and for the antibiotics she prescribed. Also for the pain beginningto subside. Love, Jean
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Jean, I am sorry you had to endure a uti on top of everything else. I am so glad you got on some antibiotics. I hope it works quickly to knock this out. I know how miserable those infections are. Thanks for letting me know that Howard is your BIL. It helps when I know who I am praying for.
I sent off all of your posts for Sue Hahn's mother this afternoon. I sent a card from all of us as well. I told her I would like to meet her but I am leaving it up to her to contact me if she is up to it. I haven't heard anymore from her pastor after emailing him earlier in the week but I know he is very busy.
Char, I hope you made it back home safely. I have prayed for your camp as well as for your Dad.
Lucy, I hope you are okay. Looking forward to hearing from you when you are up to it.
Mags, I hope you are better. I was thinking today was when you were going to get some results from your lung function test. Praying that whatever it is will be able to be easily treated.
I hope you all have a restful night and that side effects are minimal.
Love you all,
Nancy
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Hello Warriors!
Sorry it's been a while had a busy few days. I have to say working 3 days a week at the office and increasing my workouts to daily now keep me busy. Along with bible studies which I love. So here I am wide awake at 12:50am after sleeping for only a couple of hours. I am well and I have read the posts just haven't posted. I have not heard what my results are from the scan on Monday. I plan on calling tomorrow afternoon if they don't call me.
Nancy you are such a blessing and I so appreciate you on our board. I agree that this place is so good for our support group and encouragement. I will go back and find that post and delete my name. Nancy do you by chance know what day that was? Thank you for putting together the notes and sending them to her mom. I pray that touches her in a very special way to know how much Sue was loved. I also pray that she wants to meet with you and her brother too.
Jean good to see your doing well. I am praying for you daily.
I created a prayer tablet to keep all the people listed as I have so many I pray for and it is just to hard to remember everyone without a help tool. I have it in sections one for family one for church family and one for my BCO family. It is small enough to carry in my purse so I can pray anytime and have it with me.
I started something new tonight with my sister who lives a few hours away. She wanted to know if I would be willing to have a bible study over the phone. I said of course and so tonight we started and we will be reading the book of James and discussing it each week on Thursday. This along with my study on Tuesday will keep me more in the Word which is what I have been wanting. I am pleased to do this with my sister. She is 10 years older than me.
Well ladies I will keep you all in my prayers and stay strong and know God is with us everyday. Thank you all so much for being here for me. Love you all.
Lucy
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comments about BCO and how it has helped you. Thanks for sharing Bandwoman!!!
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You're welcome Mods.
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Grateful today for my uti being treated. I got through a whole night without an accident. Pain is gone. Thank you Jesus. Grateful for you wonderful ladies who lift me up in prayer.
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Days 4-6 after chemo have been the roughest, and this is no exception. The abdominal cramping is not as bad as it was the first few times, as the doc prescribed a med that helps, but it is still really painful. I'll be so glad to get past this.
I did hear from the oncologist's nurse yesterday, but it seems the lung function test has not shown anything significant enough to account for the ongoing shortness of breath. She said he will review the results more thoroughly and get back to me. So I'm still in limbo on that.
Feeling really underwater today. Having trouble focusing on anything. So glad for those of you who didn't have to have chemo!
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Mags, I have been fervently praying for you. As I was praying this verse kept coming to my mind.
But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head. This is Ps. 3:3
I am getting ready to leave the house but I will continue to pray for you dear one. My heart aches for you with all the stuff you have been through. I pray that this stomach cramping will leave and that the Lord will breathe fresh air into your lungs and that this shortness of breath will leave as quickly as it came.
I will post more later. Hang in there. I feel the worst for you is about over. I am holding your hand be it in spirit.
Love,
Nancy
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Hi Mags, I have been gone all afternoon but you have been on my heart all day. I have prayed for you so many times as the Lord brought you to mind. I am praying that you are resting comfortably and can just ride these side effects out with the power of people praying for you and knowing how Jesus is right beside you holding you.
Love,
Nancy
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