thread for middle age to older Christian women.
Comments
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Ellen, thank you for the updates. Please do come back from time to time and not be a total "lurker". We love to hear from you and will certainly keep you in our thoughts and prayers too.
Lord bless and keep you (and congratulations on the upcoming babies - what a joy!)
Ade
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Ellen, I lurk for the most part also but post occasionally
This is to ask you ladies to pray for my sister who had treatment for retinal cancer about a year ago. They have found some spots on her liver and she needs to go for a biopsy to see if it has spread. Love, Jean
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Ade, I am glad Maggie has made it through her surgery. Continued prayers for strength and for financial provision. Cammie backslide very late last night..........at least it was only #2 on the floor and not #1!!!! Also the whole room is lined (now after last summer) with kitty litter pads. It is quite the fashion statement!!!!
Jean, praying for your sister that those spots will be nothing. I have spots there also but it was nothing of concern and praying hers will be the same.
Ellen, with all that you do I certainly understand not having the time or energy to post. I know we have shared the same timeline on this thread and you will always be a special friend to me and I know we will stay in touch but I will still miss seeing your posts. Maybe we can encourage you to stop in occasionally especially when the new grand babies arrive. I know God will use you with your Bible studies and as the pastor's wife in your church. I know you have been through alot these past five years with your second bc journey and your hip replacements. You have come through it all with grace, strength and courage.
God bless your in your future endeavors and I can't wait to see pics of the new babies.
Love,
Nancy
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Hello all, I wanted to post a praise report! I went for both a bone and CT scan this week, as the oncologist thought she felt enlarged nodes under my left breast, one near my right clavicle, and a second lymph node under my right arm, not far from the sentinel node and lump in my right breast, where I've recently been diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer. Both scans were clear!! She is a bit concerned with some node shadows near my liver, so she's ordered a PET scan for next week, and I have a meeting with a breast surgeon on the 24th so discuss surgery options and set up a surgery appt. The surgeon will decide if I need chemo before surgery...I think I am dreading chemo and radiation more than the surgery!
I would appreciate your prayers, and please know I check this forum almost daily to see who I can offer prayer for. God is SO good!
Victoria
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Victoria, that is GREAT news. I have been praying for you. Praying that the PET scan will show nothing of concern in these other areas. Praying that when you see your surgeon on the 24th you will get clarification as to what plan of action is best for you. I think for most women once they have a plan in place it is a relief from the anxiety of the unknown. You seem to have a very positive attitude and that with your faith will help you get through whatever you will face.
I could use prayer dear ladies. I saw my social worker for the first time yesterday after five weeks without her. She had to cancel my apt last week and with me being gone for three weeks it all added up. She stressed the importance of putting myself first which I never do. She said there are important categories, urgent categories and urgent and important categories. She said taking care of myself right now falls under the urgent and important category. I have been so burdened by starting this paper work for my Mom and still madly trying to finish my yard. I was supposed to go swimming today and God had other plans and a neighbor came by and we talked.
Okay here is the interesting and miraculous part. When I asked the social worker just how I go about taking care of myself she said think about what you need and pray for God to show me what I need. So I prayed that yesterday and have actually never prayed like that before. This morning when I checked my email there was an email saying we have received your note from your doctor. ( I had NO idea what they were talking about.) It was from Cleaning For a Reason which are companies who clean cancer patients houses for free for a few times. I had this service five years ago and it was such a blessing. I sent a message in MyChart to my social worker wondering if she had anything to do with this. We had not discussed cleaning house as being a burden and energy sucking thing but it is. She works with my oncologists so I could see her setting this up for me...........or it could be a mistake but that would be a stretch since this company had my email address etc .
So that is my news and again I could use your prayers. Have a great weekend dear sisters.
Love,
Nancy
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Joanne, thank you for the banners. I need those reminders.
Love,
Nancy
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Victoria, rejoicing with you on the scan results! I agree with Nancy that the intensity of it all will settle down once you get a "battle plan" in place and resolve to win this fight. And always remember you are a child of the King and HE is on YOUR side.
Nancy, the way the Lord works is just beyond our comprehension isn't it! Getting that email wasn't a coincidence, it was His hand on the overload situation you had lifted up to Him. You have been under such a load with your own health issues, Cammie's issues and taking care of the boatload of your mother's issues. Jesus said that He wants to carry your load, as His load is light and He promises you His peace. I pray that you can just take a deep breath, go for a swim, take some awesome photos, and lay all of your stress and burdens at the Cross. One by one He will sort it all out and you will see it fall into place to His glory. I have had so may times when I couldn't see beyond the corner and was at my wits end. Then I get to that corner and the Lord has worked it all out ahead of me! Oh what a wonder His power and love for us are! The battle belongs to the Lord. Be still and know that HE is GOD.
Yes, Joanne, great banners! Thinking of you and all YOU are dealing with and lifting you up to the Lord and sending you a hug.
We got the master bedroom carpet laid the other day, James installed in the master bath tile & 2nd sink, and the next task is painting & installing doors and woodwork. Baby steps to a finished house that's ready to sell. (But the hiccup is that I think we are both coming down with the intestinal stuff - ugh!)
Blessings upon your weekend,
Ade
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Ade - I am starting some outside/inside renovations soon and have been reading about your adventures. Here the first goal is to aim for re-sale. Sadly the second goal is this may be where I have to do hospice. So we are aiming to balance between what the real estate market will support and what I need/want for my possibly/likely last Earthly home...if I let myself...this can become very sad business around here...
All - I just had a terrible interaction with my sister and would appreciate your perspective on it to help me gain a better perspective too.
I am the big sister of the family and have been fairly close with this sister over the years. I have seen and heard about her skewering other people, including family members, but I thought I had a "pass" from her until now.
She flew in from Maui, her home, to their condo one hour from one of our two homes. We got together to visit and she treated me to a massage, wash and blow out hairdo, fancy dinner, new necklace and a night in a beautiful city hotel with her. My b-day is in August and she noted she wanted to do this for me now as we may not be together in August. Sounds really great right?
The next morning, we had a heart-to-heart before heading our separate ways. I have VERY few people I can really talk to about the dark side of this horrible MBC disease and she has been an important one for me to confide in...
She decided to "educate" me on many things for about an hour. Of the many things she said, the one that is the most distressing is that God has put this stage 4 cancer on me to make me a better person. She defended the Army for their failure to diagnose me and now their treating me like dirt. She told me I have an obligation to be more concerned about the Army people who have been so horrible to me currently. On and on it went......
I did not completely "lose it" with her. But I did firmly stand up to her and say, "When you receive a terminal cancer diagnosis, after malpractice, amd sit with that for just one day...then come back and look me in the eye and say all these things to me again...".
She did not like this at all but she also did not comprehend what I was saying.
She actually believes these things are helpful to me or she would not have said them. She is severely mistaken. I do not want to fight with her or anyone but I do not need this in my life as I move forward on this MBC journey towards my death. I also do not want to create enemies in my own family and completely cut ties with her. That's my initial choice is to never speak to her again but it is not the way I want things to end up before my death...
I do not believe the God I believe in wants us to suffer. I believe these things happen and He wants us to trust Him to get us through it to the other side. I am doing this to the best of my ability...
Without saying she is right...please, gently help me to see this in a better light than how I feel towards her now.
Gumdoctor
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Gumdoctor, the older I get and the further into this disease I traverse, the more assertive I have become. I have been given hurtful advice from several Christian friends and I have learned not to listen to them. I don't have a sister so I don't know how to respond to this dynamic, but I have a relationship with Christ--I know my Savior and His Word. That is what I gauge my thoughts on. It sounds like you and your sister have a different depth of faith. I agree with you. The Bible clearly states only good and perfect gifts come from God; the sinful world we live in sends us the pain. My God walks alongside me to help me through the pain and suffering. If I come out better it is because I relied upon God to lead me and was obedient, so God provided the increase and the blessing. God doesn't tell us our enemies (or adversaries like the Army) should be lauded for their treatment, only that we should love our enemies in a way that leads to their salvation. In other words, we should not create a stumbling block that would inhibit their decision towards salvation by having a hateful attitude. But we do not have to believe it was done for our own good. Rubbish! Our attitude should be to pray for them that their hardened hearts will soften to treat others better. Sorry, you can tell this is a soapbox for me!
Ade, I continue to pray for this difficult time of transition for you. You are so faithful...
Nancy, I pray that you can find enough peace to take the time to care for yourself. I am learning this in baby steps, but I am learning!
I just returned from our trip to Colorado. God was so good. Even though I did not feel well a lot of the time due to fatigue from the altitude, I had strength enough for what I had to do mainly make it through the flights and short visits. I was able to visit with friends and family, and did not need extra oxygen. I actually feel pretty good after a day of flying enough to go straight out to dinner with my DD and DGD. But I am thankful to be home.
Blessings on you all, Chris
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Thank you, Ade!! 💖
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Thank you, Nancy!! 💖
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Chris, thank you for taking the time to share your perspective. You wrote it so well, I feel like we were in the same room having a conversation. Thank you so much.
Gumdoctor
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Thank you ladies for your encouragement and your prayers.
Chris, glad you have made it home safely. I was praying you would be okay while in CO. I am glad you did not need oxygen but sorry you had days of not feeling well. I am glad you are home now and that you had a chance to visit family.
Ade, you and James are amazing. You will get that house in tip top shape and I pray there will be someone just waiting for your house with your beautiful view of nature to enjoy.
Gumdoctor, I am so sorry to hear that you have had to deal with your sister's "opinion" on top of all of your other issues. I cannot relate to your stage four challenge but can only imagine how challenging that is. I can relate to being hurt by people close to me in their efforts to "educate me" on spiritual matters. God does not cause suffering but He does promise to walk through these times with us. He can use any situation for our good as Romans 8:28 tells us and perhaps your sister has somehow received a twisted message of part truth and part her own version of it. I have recently had an event with someone close to me and my knee jerk reaction was I would just isolate myself to prevent any further hurt. I know that is not what God wants for us but it is what our human condition would dictate. I know the enemy can work through some very unsuspecting vessels that are perhaps our close friend or family. I pray that you can somehow have a very direct and honest conversation with your sister and try to explain how much this has hurt you and certainly not helped without completely cutting off relations with her. Life is so difficult at times and I know that you do not know what your future holds at this point as far as time here on this Earth. I can say that I am truly sorry for your situation and I will definitely be praying for you that God would give you wisdom in how to proceed.
Have a good weekend dear ladies and have a Happy Father's Day with your family.
Love,
Nancy
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Victoria, I love your quote for your photo. Praying all goes well with your upcoming PET scan.
Love,
Nancy
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Chris I am so thankful the Lord granted you enough strength to enjoy your trip. And it is amazing you could go to dinner right after getting back! The Lord is good and greatly to be praised!
Gumdoctor, Chris had such words of wisdom & comfort that I can't improve on that but to say AMEN. I can feel your pain. My (only) sister and I made an agreement that I would care for Dad in his old age and she, our mother as we are most like that parent. James & I took my dad in and cared for my father until his death and then I gave my sister 1/2 of the meager inheritance and we split his belongings together agreeably. As Mom was ailing I would drive the half hour to visit with her 2-3 times a week and bring her frozen dinners that I would make that she could simply microwave and have a decent meal. James did all of her household repairs and ran errands. My sister bought Mom's groceries, put them on her table and promptly left - she was "busy". I made sure to hug Mom every time and tell her I loved her - Lisa didn't ever. This is the mother who had an affair with her best friend's husband and evicted my little family from her apartment when we had nowhere else to go, so she could carry on more conveniently and discretely. Anyway, the time came when Mom needed more care so Mom gave Lisa $20,000 to move just around the block from her. Soon after, Lisa bought another, very elaborate home and moved Mom in with her. That only lasted a few months then she (without consulting me) put Mom in a nursing home which Mom hated. Somehow I got the blame for that. Before Mom passed away she had changed her will to give me 25% and Lisa 75%. Lisa knew this all the time and of course didn't object. Then Lisa and her daughter divided all of Mom's things between themselves and I was 'allowed' to choose from the leftovers stored in her basement. The hurt comes from the betrayal of my mother and sister - not the inheritance thing, the "stuff". I have not seen my sister in 8 years. We have emailed twice. She said she wanted to maintain a relationship so I wrote - and she never answered. I know this isn't the same as your sister's accusations regarding the cancer, defending the Army, etc. - but it does involve a lack of caring and love and a betrayal of one who should love you. My sister has no remorse whatsoever for any of it so there was no apology for the hurt that was caused, but I have given her over to the Lord. She is a Christian and her greed got the best of her. Greed seems to me a thing that has inflicted Mom's father on down as I could see it in others along the way too. Anyway I have given my sister over to the Lord and He can deal with her greed which was more powerful than love of family. In releasing her to the Lord I am released from the bitterness, anger and hurt which are sinful in the Lord's eyes for me to cling to. I pray the Lord will heal your pain and touch your sister with compassion for what you are going through, that you can have a restored relationship. If this doesn't happen you simply have to give her over to the Lord as I did with mine, and know that the Lord knows the pain you are suffering and all that you are dealing with, and He loves you. By the way, Mom passed on 8 years ago today. I was with her at her death. Since she had stopped reading the Bible and she had turned her back on the Lord completely I asked to speak one more time about Him as she was on her death bed. She said I could, but to make no more mention of it ever again. I shared the message of salvation with her (which she knew), and she with an emotionless face turned her face to the wall and never spoke to me again.
We certainly do suffer pain, hardship and rejection in this life, but look at the pain and rejection our dear Savior endured. His own beloved disciples turned away in His final hours, and He felt the Father turn away (which He had to in order to complete His plan of salvation for us). Ours is no more suffering, surely, than His. He does understand and He gets us through it all to the other side because of His great love for His own. How precious that love is and we cherish it forever. Take comfort that this too shall pass, He is coming for His own, and we will see Glory with Him someday where there is no more pain or tears. He alone is our hope, our joy, our peace. He will never leave us or forsake us. How blessed we are to be His forever!
Ade
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I have to add that through giving my blood sister over to the Lord and releasing her from my emotions, the Lord has given me the most wonderful spiritual sister I have ever had. I dread the day we have to part when we move from here, as does she, but I will always have her in my heart. She is a gift from the Lord and I thank Him with all of my heart. God is so good!
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I have not been on much over the past few weeks. Life just took over all my spare time. I just jumped straight to the bottom of the thread. If I take time to read all the post I would not have time to post! I pray you all are doing well and summer is bringing joy to you all. I always try to find a little joy in everything no matter how difficult it maybe. After my father in law passed away our little cat became sick. He was getting better but crossed the Rainbow Bridge so unexpectedly. Then 2 weeks later our big cat( Izzy) was struggling to breath. I thought maybe he was a bit anxious with out Bernie (little cat) and my DH was out of town overnight. Izzy loved DH and was always on his lap or at his side. DH took him to the vet and he was bleeding internally. The vet drained all the blood and did xray and test. Wasnt sure if it was a heart issue or cancer. DH brought Izzy home and he made it almost 2 weeks. We had the Hospice Vet come to the house. She was so wonderful. Izzy was in the hallway and she laid down with him and just talked to him. She told told him she was going to give him something to help him relax. She gave him the sedation and DH carried him to the livingroom where the vet was going to do the euthanasia. Izzy passed in DH arms before she could even start the IV. Izzy's body was full of cancer. Hard to believe we lost both our boys with a few weeks. We are a petless home for the first time in our lives. No plans on getting another pet anytime soon. For now we will just love on the neighbor's cat that hangs out here all day.
Have a beautiful day ladies...I hope you all are doing well. I'll try to read the older posts when I have a few extra minutes.
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Ade, it sounds like Gumdoctor's experience opened up a whole box of past hurts for you too. I am sorry that families have to go through the things they do when the people who should be loving us are the ones that can deeply wound us so badly. I am glad the Lord has brought another sister into your life and that you have moved on from this hurt.
Vargadoll, I am sorry to hear about your FIL passing away. Your DH and of course you as well have certainly had your shares of grief and death lately. I am sorry to hear about your cats passing away and so close together. Izzy dying in DH's arms was meant to be. Glad to hear from you but sorry that you have gone through so much loss.
This must be the sad cat posts for today. Cammie, my cat started in meowing way early this morning and continued this for several hours. I was up and down trying to figure out what was wrong. She ended up throwing up only liquid and was acting funny. I was afraid we were going to have to take her to the vet quickly but she seemed to snap out of it.
Very sad news. One of my dearest friends who I have sat with in church for many years is 90 yrs old with dementia. We can still sit together and laugh and usually it is over cat stories. She has a cat that has a type of doggie door where it can come and go outside freely and apparently spends alot of time outdoors. Her daughter emailed me today and said that the neighbor found her cat dead and apparently someone shot him. The police have been notified. My friend is named Bonnie and I would appreciate you praying for her. I thought I would give it some time before I called her. I am not sure how she is going to react or if she will even remember but her daughter said she saw the dead cat so that will probably stick in her mind. I don't understand the cruelty of some people.
On a more positive note my Great Blue Heron pic that I shared recently made it into my newspaper and I am now a finalist for the winner of the month of June. Also I have made really good progress on my Mom's VA application to the point that I am close to done after emailing the VA guy and realizing I didn't have to do as much as I thought I did. He advised getting in the application asap. I am getting the more advanced shingles vaccine next Friday and fully expecting to be sick for a few days afterwards as that seems to be the case with this more powerful vaccine. I got summoned for Jury Duty on July 8 so these things are making it difficult to get back downstate to turn in the application which I want to do in person as there is much to be scanned etc. I am just glad that I was able to start on the "fun" yesterday and made such good progress.
I hope you all have a good night.
Love,
Nancy
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Thanks JoAnne. Actually the VA requirements are different as of 2018 and I think they are different for each state as well. I did email this VA man I dealt with and he answered me back as I found out last night. From the start I told him we had withdrawn money for my Mom's funeral and it was sitting in her checking account. I asked him if we should spent that asap since he wants the application in quickly. He said it was okay to have it in there now as he wanted some important documents right away. So my sister is dropping off the doctor's evaluation and I emailed him the facility director's document. We found out this administrator for my Mom's facility is resigning as of July 3 for health reasons so that was a shock. It concerns me but hopefully they can move forward with a new one. From my latest reading on Medicaid I don't even think they allow funeral expenses but from my VA internet searches I have found contradictory things so who knows. The VA won't take the house but Medicaid would. I am praying that we will get accepted for the VA and that it will be enough to last for my Mom's life as she is getting quite frail now. My sister doesn't think we will have to worry about Medicaid but only God knows that. With the VA there is a three year look back and we have nothing to hide so hopefully she will get the help she needs. Once the application has been sent even if it takes a year for approval which is highly possible it is retroactive so that is good to know.
Got to run. Thanks.
Love,
Nancy
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Vargadoll I'm so sorry you have had such loss. Those who don't love animals or have pets just can't understand how devastating a loss can be. And you lost your father-in-law too! May the Lord comfort you and your husband in these tough times.
Nancy I'm so glad your mom's application is moving along and that Cammie is ok. That was quite a scare! James really needs to apply for more than his 20% VA disability - especially since his heart attacks - but he is delaying it until we move & get settled in (which I don't understand). I think we should start the process now as it takes so long and we truly need the extra benefits & travel reimbursement. We went the 3+ hours to Odessa yesterday for his VA eye appointment and we're both exhausted today. It was 103 degrees up there and he had been sick for 4 days prior. I got one of those aura migraines as we were sitting in the Subway at Walmart and THAT was fun as I couldn't see! I keep Imetrex with me and thankfully the Lord used it to calm things down. Perhaps that's the last trip up there for medical appts. we'll have since my next onc. appt. isn't until December & we should be moved by then. We will have to travel up there to Midland to get a flight to Ohio when the house sells, so we can finalize on another home there. We used to complain in Ohio that it took an hour to get to the airport - here it is over three!
Joanne, how are things with you? How can I pray for you?
Last night the Lord gave us such a pretty sunset after keeping us safe on the trip. He is so good!
Blessings on your day,
Ade
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P.S. Congratulations on your heron pic, Nancy! We know it will be a June winner!
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Hi sisters,
My week began with a wonderful surprise...my grandson Connor joined us Monday at about 1:30 pm...10 days early...doing well, head full of hair, and a healthy 8 lbs. Mom and dad are handling this new arrival well. It is their first child, and I am so excited for them. I'm staying with them right now, but haven't done much...if all goes well with his appointment tomorrow I'll be returning home to pick up my responsibilities there.
So thankful God has seen fit to let me enjoy another grandchild. Now anxiously awaiting the baby girl in October.
Blessings on all of you...you are in my prayers!
Ellen
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Ellen, congratulations on the birth of your grandson. God is good!
Ade, beautiful picture!
Nancy, Your heron picture deserves a grand prize!
The medicine I am on is a 21 day on, 7 day off cycle. I am on my off cycle week and always feel worse that week--this week. Haven't left the house since Saturday. But my DH is winding down towards his retirement and is spending more time at home so I have some help with my extreme fatigue. And my DD and DGD are spending the week on vacation in NY so it is very quiet around here. It also provides the best opportunity to remember you all in my prayers.
Blessings, Chris
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Ade, after hearing your long drive to your medical apts I will NEVER complain about any of mine which sometimes feels long but certainly is nothing like you have had to endure. Getting a migraine on top of it was a major bummer!
Since my BIL is now at 100% disability I am curious. Did James serve in the Vietnam War? If so maybe I could share some things with you.
Beautiful sunset. I will miss seeing those pics after you move but I am sure you will have many other opportunities to get some beautiful pics in Ohio. Thank you for your encouragement on my Heron pic. I was telling my social worker today that it would be something if I won then I could officially celebrate my five as a bc survivor which begins on July 4 with my fifth win with the newspaper.
Grandma Ellen, CONGRATULATIONS on your new grandson, Connor. So glad you could be there to help and hopefully everything will be fine so you can return home. Now praying that Connor will have a new cousin in October!!!
Chris, I am sorry to hear about your fatigue. I am glad to hear that your DH will be home more. Sounds like you will have a little more quiet time as well with your daughter and granddaughter on vacation. I too am experiencing great fatigue and I am getting really concerned as I am not sure what is the cause. I can't believe I forgot to tell my social worker about this today and asked her if this could all be tied in with the reactive depression. I seem to hit a wall especially in the evening. Thank you for your encouragement on my photo. The big win is a $50 gift card at this camera store so every little bit helps as this hobby is very expensive.
I got summoned for jury duty and if I don't snap out of this fatigue I have no idea how I can get up really early to get to the courthouse which is in another town and serve all day. It is a trial jury so if called it can last up to three days. Hopefully it will be like the last time I served and stayed all day just to say you can all go home now because they settled out of court.
I am having the new shingles vaccine which my new primary doctor wanted me to get since I have had shingles three times and two of those was after I had the original vaccine. The good thing is this one is much more effective but the bad news is you can have flu like symptoms up to three days afterward. UGH
Have a good night dear ladies. Praying for your needs you have expressed.
Love,
Nancy
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Chris - may the Lord lift you up in His healing hands and grant you the strength you need.
Ellen - wonderful news! God's timing is always right. Congratulations!
Nancy - you can get excused from jury duty (I did) by telling them you are experiencing health problems related to cancer & treatment. There is no way I would have the strength to do jury duty now. My onc. calls it "disease related fatigue". I just helped James put in some marigolds this morning (but it was HOT) and it wiped me out. You do AMAZE me with all that you do! I know I couldn't keep up with you. Please do take time to take a day off to rest and do what you want to do while resting (for me that is reading!). It will be a big load off of you when your mom's VA paperwork is done I know!. Yes James was in the Viet Nam era service though he didn't have to ship out. There are some things I can tell you but in private. I pray your vaccine will NOT have any ill effects on you.
Blessings on your night,
Ade
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Good news,ladies. I saw my dermatologist at Sloan-Kettering yesterday and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't find a single spot on my skin to biopsy. I also had a bone density. Results soon. Many life challenges lately but I am getting through as I remember that without Jesus I can do nothing. I only get in trouble when I try to do things on my own.
Love, Jean
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Amen to that. True for all of us. We are so human and understand so little about the whole picture. God who created us, and loves us so, understands all.
Gumdoctor
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Yes, Ade, today I am taking off swimming and going out of town to the butterfly house which will be fun even though I am not feeling well. Short night! Love that pig photo. Yes, I do know I can try to get out of jury duty but it might come up again when I am at my Mom's so I will suck it up and do the best I can. I did find out my Free Cleaning from the company that cleans for women cancer patients for free was a mistake which I was thinking. Oh well. Not I don't have to stress about getting my house in order for someone to come in and clean. LOL
Congrats Jean on no more spots on skin!!!
Gumdoctor, hope you have a good day and weekend. That goes for all of you too!!
Love,
Nancy
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For al Nancy and any other ladies with cats who don't always use the litter box here is a link that may help.....Jean
https://www.thesprucepets.com/help-with-cat-pooping-on-rug-554023
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