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thread for middle age to older Christian women.

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Comments

  • Mini1
    Mini1 Member Posts: 1,309
    edited April 2013

    Yes. Talk to the hospital. They often have outreach info for groups that can financially assist  you.

    No call from the hospital today to ask me to come back for add'l mammography. I'm taking that as a good sign!

  • Rocket
    Rocket Member Posts: 910
    edited April 2013

    Good to hear that they are taking care of the bill Bestock. I have been praying. You have such strong faith, even when you are experiencing difficulty. God hold you in the palm of His hand!

  • ChristineO
    ChristineO Member Posts: 18
    edited April 2013

    J0-5 Hi there, Yes I did get my drains out.  Uh oh how did you know that you needed it to be drained?  

  • patoo
    patoo Member Posts: 5,243
    edited April 2013

    Just popping by to say HI to everyone.

    Prayers going up; blessings coming down!

  • Kindergarten
    Kindergarten Member Posts: 2,883
    edited April 2013

    Hi, Patoo!! I just love your post!! I will be saying that alot!!!!!

  • Jeannie57
    Jeannie57 Member Posts: 1,314
    edited April 2013

    Bestock, so good to hear that your med. was covered. Praying for you, that You will continue to receive God's peace as you undergo treatment. And for healing, of course!!!



    Mini1, I'm glad to hear you didn't receive that call yesterday.



    Rocket, I'm so happy you can relax your mind with your mom now getting such good care. I pray your foot will heal and that your upcoming times of having company will bring you pleasure.



    JO-5, Kindergarten and Patoo, love your posts! Thinking of you and everyone I haven't mentioned.



    I'm doing pretty well. I've been on Tamoxifen for almost two weeks with minimal side effects so far. I'm having trouble making exercise a habit. I like to walk but not necessarily in the rain here in the Seattle area. The elliptical upstairs keeps calling me! I'm trying to get into a Livestrong exercise class at the Y. How are the rest of you doing with exercise?



    God bless you!

    Jeannie

  • Kindergarten
    Kindergarten Member Posts: 2,883
    edited April 2013

    HI, Jeannie, So good to see you post!! So glad you are doing well on Tamoxifen!  I have been taking aromasin for 7 1/2 years, my onc wants me on it for another 2 years. I have joined Weight Watchers and love the program, and since you can eat your activity points, I try to exercise everyday. I love the elyptical and the treadmill, they burn alot of calories. Hubby and I also ride bikes and walk. Be easy on yourself, you are still recovering! Better weather will be coming and then you can take some nice long walks. Blessings, KathySmile

  • fondak
    fondak Member Posts: 271
    edited April 2013

    Hi everyone,

    I just lost the post I wrote out but I think basically I can say ditto to Jeannie's post with the exception of the last paragraph!

    Jeannie, I hope you will be like my mom on Tamoxifen.  Other than a few hot flashes when she first started, it hasn't impacted her at all.  She does wonder if it has made her hair thinner but she bought a new shampoo that has made a huge difference. 

    I went for what I thought was just an informational appointment w/a plastic surgeon that my regular surgeon sent me too.  I left pretty confused.  They are ready to set up the surgery for the TRAM.  I thought it was just so I could discuss it more with my surgeon when I go back in 6 months.  I can't get expanders because of the radiation.  I also can't stay as I am because he said being a size D, I will have problems with my shoulder, neck and back wth the weight difference.

    I read that DIEP is much less invasive but not all surgeons perform it.  I have been very confused about what to do. I think I would like to find surgeon in Atlanta but I hate to be in the hospital there for 5 days.  My mom can't drive around Atlanta but really I don't need anyone there while I'm there.  I'm just confused about it all.  I really wasn't thinking about reconstruction.

    Christine, I'm glad to hear your drains are out. I know that helps a lot.

    Love and prayers for you all!

  • Kindergarten
    Kindergarten Member Posts: 2,883
    edited April 2013

    Dear Fondak, always so good to see your posts. I will pray for discernment as to what type of surgery will be best for you. You will be led in the right direction, prayers will be answered. God bless you, Kathy

  • Jeannie57
    Jeannie57 Member Posts: 1,314
    edited April 2013

    Fondak, I am getting DIEP in July.  It doesn't involve taking any muscle, while the TRAM does.  I am fortunate that there are two surgeons at my hospital that do DIEP surgeries all the time.  You do need someone experienced.  I hope you can clear up the confusion as to what, where, when you should have reconstruction. Don't let anybody pressure you!  

  • tootz1
    tootz1 Member Posts: 18
    edited April 2013

    Hi, am new to the community. Lumpectomy/snb 2 wks ago, pathology results delayed so waiting. Grateful for this thread, uplifting and feel a shared experience with sisters. Alot of things occurring in my life, non-BC related that bring me to my knees more often. From where does my help come? The Lord. Reminds me of scripture, "though He slay me, yet will I trust Him". Would appreciate your prayers that I remain strong through the trials and my heart at peace. Sharing online in this community is easier than sharing with my small group from church.       

      

  • Kindergarten
    Kindergarten Member Posts: 2,883
    edited April 2013

    Welcome, Welcome, Navmaiden!! You will find the most caring Christian women here!! Lots of support, prayers and inspiration! I am lifting you up in prayer right now!! Our Lord will see you through every trial and challenge that you experience!!! God Bless You!

  • Mini1
    Mini1 Member Posts: 1,309
    edited April 2013

    Yes, welcome! NacMaiden. The ladies here are wonderful. Such a blessing to have the prayers and support of our sisters here.

    I got my 1 year mammo results back and all is free and clear! Yeah. PTL!

  • tootz1
    tootz1 Member Posts: 18
    edited April 2013

    Kindergarten, thank you for your prayers. I feel a kinship already. :)



    Mini1, PTL. May He continue to watch over you. Thank you for the warm welcome.



    Our God is an awesome God. May the words of my mouth continually praise Him.

  • patoo
    patoo Member Posts: 5,243
    edited April 2013

    Ditto, welcome navmaiden.  Your post brought a big smile because you interjected scripture.  Wonderful.  Praying for you to have an uneventful BC journey as the Lord surrounds you with His unending love.

    Mini1 - all praises to our Lord who is AWESOME!

    Hi JO-5 (twin), fondak, kindergarten, ChristineO, Jeannie57, Rocket, bestock - everyone.  Have a blessed weekend.

  • CCFW
    CCFW Member Posts: 570
    edited February 2014

    del

  • patoo
    patoo Member Posts: 5,243
    edited April 2013

    Great tips CC.  Another thing to do is just march in place 15-30 mins while you watch the news or a sitcom/tv program.  I do that most evenings before bed even though I'm finally back to 'almost' regular exercising.

  • ChristineO
    ChristineO Member Posts: 18
    edited April 2013

    Hi ladies, I feel like at this time I am just asking...like I have nothing to give.  I feel deflated and empty though I know God is with me I think it must just be a period of time where I am needing and not able to give.  I know you have all gone through so much more than myself so I also feel guilty for not being more upbeat and positive. Its been just over 2 wks since my surgery (bilateral mast).  Though the intense pain has gone I still have some and I feel uncomfortable and find my back aches when I sleep so I'm tired.  I'm not sure when I can look forward to sleeping on my side.  Do you have any idea? My husband was looking online for a pillow to help and he saw one that is kind of a moustache shape to support me under my chest.  Not sure if thats a good one or not.  I sure wish I could transport my hospital bed home! I also feel this trickling feeling whenever i get up and move around.  Since my drains are out I worry that i am bleeding inside and will need that needle thing you mentioned.  I must have nerve damage as well as my upper arm on the right feels burned.  I have thyroid issues too (hashimotos) and I dont know if that plays into it or not but I nearly fainted the other day when i tried to have a body shower. I have lower blood pressure than most I thnk and wonder if it just dropped as I have had two episodes (one previous to surgery) where I literally cant move for the nausea and weakness and I either drop to the floor to lie down (couldnt do that this time) to feel better.  I guess I am just discouraged.  Looking for advice too.  thanks so much.

  • Jeannie57
    Jeannie57 Member Posts: 1,314
    edited April 2013

    Dear Christine, it's okay to feel needy. Please don't feel guilty about it! I hope you can feel comfortable being honest with us. None of us has it all together all the time. We're all at different points in our journey and have experienced the same things and different things. I can say that you are going to feel physically better. It's great that you can see progress since your surgery. Your body has had a physical assault and just needs to calm down and heal. Please call your doctor or nurse with your questions, too. They want to help you.



    Have you tried putting a pillow under your knees when you sleep? That takes pressure off of your back when you are laying on your back.



    I felt faint in the shower at times, too. It was explained to me that the hot water draws the blood away from your heart and other organs to your skin. I don't know if the Hashimoto's plays a role. For me, it eventually passed. I was also low in salt, but I'm not sure if that contributed. I don't think it was from dehydration because I made it a point to hydrate before my shower. Another question for your doc?



    Here's a verse that helps me:

    "I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me." Psalm 16:8



    Also:

    "The Lord your God is going with you! He will fight for you...and He will give you victory!"



    Praying for you!

    Jeannie

  • Kindergarten
    Kindergarten Member Posts: 2,883
    edited April 2013

    Dear ChristineO!! Please always feel comfortable coming here for encouragement, advice and prayer!! Jeannie had great advice about the pillow, and it really helps to recite scripture out loud when you are feeling down or stressed!! I love those verses as well!! Just take one day at a time and take care of you!!! Rest, and take a walk when you can!! This challenging journey will end and you will be your old self again!!! Keep in touch with your doctors!!! Blessings, Kathy

  • Mini1
    Mini1 Member Posts: 1,309
    edited April 2013

    I echo everything JO-5 says. It's been just a year for me (with the same surgery & treatment as Jo-5) and I still have my ups and downs and expect it will be that way for a time to come. Thank goodness we can lean on the Lord in both the good or bad times.

  • patoo
    patoo Member Posts: 5,243
    edited April 2013

    Much love and hugs coming your way ChristineO.  I ditto what the others have said above.  You will get through this because you have the Lord and you have your wonderful sisters here.  Thank you for sharing your hurts, fears, and disappointments.  Please don't ever feel you are burdening us.  The Lord put us into your life for just this reason - support during a difficult time.

    (((( Christine )))) - hugs aplenty.  Just reach out and pluck one from the air when you need it.  There's lots more where they came from!

  • fondak
    fondak Member Posts: 271
    edited April 2013

    Hi everyone!

    I just wanted to check in on everyone real quick.  We had our last weekend conference this Fri and Sat at church and then I was gone all day today so I'm very tired and about to head to bed.  I did want to just comment to Navmaiden and Christine quickly though.

    To Kindergarten, Jeannie, Rocket, Pattoo, Mini, CCFW, Bestock and all you ladies here...I'm tired and I'm sure I'm forgetting some very special ladies but I love you all and hope you all are just being conformed more to the image of Christ each day!  I know it's sometimes painful but it's always good!

    Welcome Navmaiden, I am glad you are here and I'll be praying for you as you wait for more information and for the other struggles you are facing in addition to the cancer.  I was in that place too with my diagnosis and I can tell you I am so thankful for God loving me enough to teach all that I have been learning through these tests.  I pray that for you too!  I know it can be difficult.

    Christine,

    I love what the other ladies have said here.  I pray that you will be encouraged.  As for not giving....well, you are giving when you allow us to do what God has commanded us to in Gal 6:2 Bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. Gal 6:9 Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. v10 So then, while we have the opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are in the household of faith.  I just put that in bold because it's what I love so much about this group of ladies.

    So, thank you for allowing us to be blessed by being doers of the word and not just hearers!  I will be praying for you.  Your post also serves me well by reminding me of where I was and where I am now.  This will pass for you as well. Until then I will be praying for good sleep for you.  I think one of my greatest challenges was resting.  I did sleep but not good deep sleep.  Then on chemo, there were nights I didn't sleep more than 2hrs.  Lots of those nights. 

  • curveball
    curveball Member Posts: 1,583
    edited April 2013

    >>sigh<<

    I went to my office yesterday to clear out my cubicle--I'll be retiring from my job in about three weeks. I went on Saturday to avoid meeting my co-workers, but unfortunately one of the people I least wanted to meet was there at the same time I was. She asked me a bunch of nosy questions, and kept on asking even after I said I didn't want to talk about it. (I haven't told anyone at my office about my recent stage IV diagnosis and don't plan to do so.) I tried, probably with only partial success, not to let my irritation show. How do you respond to a fellow-believer who is well-meaning but insensitive and intrusive?

  • curveball
    curveball Member Posts: 1,583
    edited April 2013

    @JO-5

    Oy, sounds like the person you have to cope with is even more annoying than my co-worker. At least she doesn't tell me her problems are/were worse than mine. (And the fact that your nemesis' problems really were worse must be more annoying than anything!) Also, thanks for the reminder that sometimes Jesus blew his stack at people. I had forgotten about that. He really laid into people sometimes. At least I didn't call my co-worker "you snake" or "viper's brood"!  Laughing

    Then again, Jesus had much better reason to be angry at the Pharisees than I have to be irritated with my co-worker. They weren't well-meaning towards him at all. Oh well, I'll probably only see her once again, at most. I think I better get an unlisted phone number, though. I don't want her to start calling me on the phone.

    And thank you for saying what you did about treatments working. One of the things my co-worker said that really got under my skin is that I should be confident God would heal me. To do her justice, she doesn't know I'm stage IV and I don't know whether she'd have said that if she knew. But thinking about it afterward I have to admit to myself I don't have enough faith to ask God to heal me. I know He is able to heal anything, but I also know that in the case of stage IV cancer, usually He doesn't heal it, at least not in the "cancer disappeared and never came back" sense. I don't expect to be given a miracle. But I think I do have enough faith to ask that my treatment will work, that the medication will keep the cancer in check, even if it doesn't make it go away.

  • bestock
    bestock Member Posts: 186
    edited April 2013

    JO-5 I don't know the whole co-worker story but sometimes people without cancer think if we have enough faith we will absolutely  be healed.

    I too believe we can and think  the Lord can do it for me stage 4 BC too. I had stage 4 OVCA in 2003, and am still here. no recurrances of ovca  Jesus does not always do what we would want, and people should know .(He is God and I am not)

    Just knowing that God is totally in control is my HOPE. Jesus said to ask, and I do and beseech Him for full recovery, if He takes me down a different road, HE will be with me so I can be confident that all will be "well"

    Welcome Navmaiden. This thread and sisters are a "god-send" It helps me so much.  So great to welcome you to our sisterhood.

  • curveball
    curveball Member Posts: 1,583
    edited April 2013

    @bestock,I was the one whose co-worker said if I had faith I would be healed. It's not that I don't think God can heal, I just don't expect it to happen in my case, because usually it doesn't. God is still God, but as far as I know, most people who get to stage IV eventually die of the cancer. Your ten-year remission from ovarian cancer is just amazing.

    I sometimes feel that "if you have enough faith you will be healed" is often another way of saying "it's your own fault that you are sick (or still sick)"--a form of blaming the victim. Not everyone got healed, even in the Bible. St Paul prayed for his "thorn in the flesh" to go away three times, and if anyone had faith it was Paul, but the "thorn" stayed firmly in place. I don't know what to think.

  • Jeannie57
    Jeannie57 Member Posts: 1,314
    edited April 2013

    Dear Bestock and Curveball, thank you for your honest sharing.  It helps us all feel safe if we can share and not be judged.  I'm thankful for this site where honest, vulnerable feelings and thoughts can be shared and supported. Your faith journey is inspiring.  I have learned to be more comfortable with not having answers as to what God is doing or what He will do.  After all, His ways are not our ways.  I pray your trust in Him will continue to deepen and He will give you peace. I care about you!  JO-5, I always enjoy reading your posts.  You are so wise.

    Welcome, Navmaiden!

    Jeannie

  • Jeannie57
    Jeannie57 Member Posts: 1,314
    edited April 2013

    Me, again.  I have a Christian friend who I have not talked to in years.  She wants to reconnect and is trying to contact me every way she can think of: through my kids, paying extra to get on my Facebook message board (didn't know you could do that).  I feel stalked. By not responding to these overtures, I hoped she would get the hint.  I am usually open to anyone, but I feel closed to her and uncomfortable about rekindling our friendship.  I fear she may be "toxic" to me.  She lives in another state, so she won't be dropping by.  I am torn as to how to handle this, but feel I should trust my gut and it says "no!"  Not sure what to do if she contacts me again. Thoughts? 

  • Rocket
    Rocket Member Posts: 910
    edited April 2013

    Hi Lovely Sisters,



    I haven't been on here for a while. I had flown my elderly mom to Maine to get her settled in another assisted living facility that we could afford. It is in the place where she raised us and I grew up. She also was born there, so for her it was like going home. She has seen a number of her old friends and some even live at the facility. I talked with her today, and she is so happy. I praise God for this miracle in her life and mine. I have had a huge burden lifted from my shoulders. It has also been an emotional roller coaster. I miss my mom, but call her almost every day.



    This past weekend, we had our DS, DIL and granddaughter for a visit. It was a ton of fun, but I am so tired (a good kind of tired though).



    Welcome Navmaiden. It's so nice to have you here and your input. You will find the sweetest sisters here - so encouraging.



    Christine,

    I also have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis and had a bi-lateral mastectomy without reconstruction. I am three years out from surgery, chemo and radiation. I was 49 when I was diagnosed, and have had many weak spells where it felt as though I would faint. I also have a heart condition, so that contributed to the problem. When I explained these weak spells where I felt total exhaustion to my onc, she stated that usually that type of fatigue affects her older patients and not the younger ones. I still have these spells, though they are less frequent. I also had six surgeries within two years time and the anesthesia really takes a lot out of you. It takes a long time to fully recover from that. So give yourself time to heal. You will recover, but the process is often slower than we desire. Make sure to tell your doctors how you are feeling so they know how to help you. Never be afraid to come here and vent or ask questions. We've all had similar and different experiences, so there is usually a lot of wisdom to be had. I know the ladies here have helped me so many times when I was down and hurting. God has used this thread to build me up and I'm so thankful to all of you. I am praying for you to feel better quickly. Rest Dear One, rest.



    I start back to therapy on Wednesday for my foot. It is still painful and swollen, but I am walking on it just the same, as instructed. My PCP also put me on a statin drug for my high cholesterol due to the Arimidex. It was 180 prior to BC and now it's 281 despite a healthy diet with very little meat or animal products! So far the statin drug has increased my muscle and joint pain, but I had that from Arimidex and RSD anyway, so what's a little more pain? I'm just praying the statin doesn't interfere with my liver function tests as they really scare me when my numbers run higher than normal. Hopefully it will bring down my cholesterol. It better! Jo I know how you feel. :-)



    Curveball, I am sorry to hear of your stage IV dx. I too believe that God can and does heal. Hope is a powerful thing. I too pray for effective treatments for you.



    Bestock, keeping you in prayer too Hon that your treatments would kick that cancer's butt. Hope you are holding up okay.



    I pray for all of you ladies and I hope that you doing well.

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