Calling all TNs
Comments
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I am so heartbroken that I am not sure I can stay at work this afternoon. I so so so badly wanted to hear back from Susan, I feel like I never said goodbye even though she said hers . I used to feel special when she replied to my posts. I think I even got some PM's from her, which are really treasured. It seems so strange that they would both pass so close to one another. Heidi - I am sure you must have felt their presence, either one or both. We all connected with these two amazing women because they had so much knowledge and love for everyone. Susan was such an amazing woman with a very organized and calm mind. She could figure out any situation with her acquired knowledge of this beastly disease and the intelligence that she was gifted with. I am so very saddened, and at the same time, I am so very scared that this is happening to very young, bright women like Suze and LJ.
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MicheleS, thanks for the information and I'll put my post about Suze over on that thread.
This is a sad day.
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I so want to say something inspirational to Susan's kids right now, but can barely see past the tears. Guess I will post later when I am more composed. So very sad.
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I just don't know what to say....my heart literally went thump. Linda, I agree, they moved on together, like their New York trip! Susan was wearing her green Louis V. shoes. Both of these women were here for me when I received my second diagnoses. Susan was such a wealth of information. I kept thinking she would pop back in here, cancer in regression. What are we going to do about this rotten disease? I feel so helpless, I want to do something.
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Welcome Betty, I am sorry you have had such a tough go. I am also sorry you had to join us, just as we have lost two dear members, within days of one another. They reached out to me when I joined, and now I'm reaching out to you. If you need us, we are here.
I tortured myself yesterday by reading over this entire thread. LJ and Susan had such courage and such hope. My heart aches for their friend's and families.
My good thing today was a walk around the river boardwalk, with my husband.
Karen.... Passing along the box of tissue.0 -
Thank you for letting us know. I've been a longtime lurker, and I fondly remember reading Suze's posts. She and I were diagnosed on the same day.
This news is breaking my heart. 0 -
Bak- I just saw a shoe sale ad in the paper and thought- I bet Laurajane and Susan are up in heaven sipping on chocolate martinis and trying on shoes!
I'd like a tissue please.
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In the rising of the sun and its going down,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
In the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
At the beginning of the year and when it ends
WE REMEMBER THEM.
When we are lost and sick at heart,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
When we have joys we yearn to share,
WE REMEMBER THEM.
As long as we live, they too shall live,
For they are now a part of us.
WE REMEMBER THEM.0 -
Susan was a wonderful person. I feel so privileged to have known both Susan and LJ from this forum. Even in her message to us from you, Kim, it is obvious she cared what we felt and didn't want to add to our fears. Thank you for posting this very sad news.
She was instrumental in helping me find a clinical trial for additional chemo. She sent me the link in a message. When I was intially turned down, she was hopping mad along with me, then truly excited for me when I got in. She had great dignity, maturity, logic, and love for all. She taught us all to be our own advocates as patients, too. I learned so much from her approach to life. I remember what she said about how we have to be connected in some way in the future after going through all this together. I hope it is true.
I keep thinking of a poem segment that I have always loved: "Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light. I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night." - Sarah Williams
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Stars in the Sky
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I am sorry to say I just feel angry about losing Laura and Susan like this.
I am so sad for their families, and for all of us here. I just didn't expect this to happen so quickly.0 -
I was worried about suze when I noticed she had not logged on in a few days. I did not know her well. I was no longer posting often in this thread when she started posting, but I still read every so often and read her updates frequently. She, like LJ, was just amazing. I can honestly say were two of my favorite posters on this board. Always full of life and happiness while living in the worst of circumstances. It seems weird to say this, but it seems fitting or comforting (not sure what the right word is here) to know that their courses were so similar and that they both passed so close together. I imagine them together now laughing and happy, with no pain and no fear. What huge losses for this thread and this world.
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I picture them zipping around in the hereafter wearing wild shoes with their hair flying up in Suze's little white sports car.
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I am having a glass of wine (I absolutely hate wine) and I am raising my glass to each and every one of you wonderful ladies on this thread, in honor of each of you. I am so thankful to have you in my life and not having to go through this beast of a disease and all the ugliness it causes by myself. If I didn't have all of your posts to read and know that we are all sharing such raw emotions over the loss of both LJ and Susan, I think I would absolutely go nuts. Who else, but each other, can ever fully understand what we are feeling over the tragic and untimely loss of these two beautiful and amazing sisters. May God bless us all.
Linda
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I have no words. We've had such a great loss in our "family" here. This is a family.. truly I have noticed in the time I've been here, when I posted daily, as well as now when I mainly check in and lurk. Sometimes arguements arise, but this happens in the best of families and I know each of the women who come here genuinely care for each other.
It is a bit fitting that these two women who contributed so much to each of us passed only days apart. No doubt they are having the time of their forever lives now.. never to experience any more pain, sorrow, or negative test results.
I am a Christian and a believer in God. I know many here may have different religious beliefs. For me personally, God has seen me through many rough times. It was a true blessing to cross paths with two of the most wonderful, courageous women I've ever met. My prayers go out to the family.
Someone asked about facebook. I do have a facebook profile, but it may be hidden. Please send me a pm if you would like to be friends and I'll try to figure out how to lift my invisibility. LOL
The best thing that happened to me today... I looked around at all the new life springing up in the form of flowers and buds on trees and realized - SPRING IS HERE. And it is beautiful!
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Has anyone heard from mbj? It was March 6th her last post..I am worried about her too.
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Linda - a clink of the glass. Very well said.
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Thinking of LJ and Suze. It does seem fitting that they may have "helped" each other leaving so close together. The best thing I did over the weekend was to save 6 kitty lives from the local kill shelter. One was close to death so emaciated and dehydrated from lack of care and no one caring that he wasn't eating, one was a pregnant mom about to give birth in a small cage without even a towel to rest upon, and the last 4 were precious little 6-week old Siamese babies just barely starting life, yet so close to having their lives snuffed out by uncaring humans. I feel so blessed to have gotten them, held them and told them they are safe now. I named the babies after spring blossoming flowers as they are starting a new life, just as LJ and Suze are on a new journey.
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Tina:
A woman after my own heart - thank you so very much for rescuing those 6 kitties. Says alot about just how fine a person you are.
Hugs,
Linda
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well ladies, it looks like my fight isn't quite over yet. the biopsy came back as malignant. i do a staging scan tomorrow morning. hopefully it hasn't spread, but i think i already know the answer to that. these past few days have turned out to be horrendous. the stress is unbelievable.
love to you all!
the best thing that happened to me today: my house is clean from the girls weekend allowing me to relax and reflect.
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I haven't posted here in a long time, but i read this thread daily. LJ and Suze have helped me without even realizing it,by their posts and zest for life. They will be greatly missed by many!
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Heidi..I see the same thing...you made me a smile with all the sadness around here...Heaven won't be the same now will it...certainly can't picture them being too dang angelic..
Inmate...you don't know yet!...Let's hang on to hope for you...
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Inmate, you keep positive and your kickass attitude. It has been one of the more crappy days I can remember for us tnbc sisters, granted... And we are here for you. you stand out, as a strong and positive force among us and I have followed your progress and comments and support, and there are a legion of us standing beside you today and tomorrows.... Please keep us updated on next steps. I sometimes don't check that often but checked today, just to check on you. Youre gonna beat this too. ((((hugs))))))))
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Inmate - thinking of you and sending you good vibes!0
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Well crap inmate. I hate this fc.Did they do a skin biopsy or where you felt the thickening? I am sure the stress is unbelievable, more scans, more waiting, that just sucks. Hoping your cancer likes to stay local, no traveling allowed!
Heidi and Titan-I imagine my best friend, who passed away 10 years ago, greeting them and showing them the ropes! My friend was wild and crazy! Never a dull moment around her, as I imagine it is the same with LJ and Susan!
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Ok, Inmate, Hang in there and get a plan. We are all here for you. Waiting sucks, fear sucks, CANCER SUCKS. Holding you close.....
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Today is certainly another sad day...goodbye to Suze, she will be missed on this thread. I pray for the families of LauraJane and Suze...the children who now need to cope without a mother. It's just not right.
Inmate - praying for no spread.
The best thing I did today was go out with my daughter to pick out a birthday present for my mother who turns 79 tomorrow.
While in the store getting my mom's gift, the song "Ain't no sunshine when she's gone" came on and my eyes filled with tears thinking of our dear sisters who have passed on.
I hope we hear from MBJ soon.
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Oh Inmate- hang on to those good thoughts that it hasn't spread.
I HATE CANCER!!!!
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Inmate - sending you healing thoughts and no spreading!
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Inmate - Honnnnneeeeey!!!!! Wish I could just come and give you a huge, tight hug. We won't allow you to go into depression or bad thoughts, every single person has their own unique destiny. There are lots of different treatments out there and I am certain that one will match with your situation. I am going to pray so hard that it is only Stage 1 or 11 and a very low grade. I sure hope that it is a "new" primary - which is still curable. Sending you love, love, hugs and more hugs. Hope I could take away all your stress.
No we haven't heard from MBJ. I want to hear from her so badly. I honestly thought that Suze was going to write a post to us about regression. I really depended on her to show us that yes, there are still some treatments out there. I am still in shock.
Linda - thanks so much for the beautiful poem! You have a really beautiful kind heart.
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