Bonfire of the Goddesses

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  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited February 2011

    Omaz- me too!!! The energizer bunny's batteries feel like they are not charged to full capacity....I want to throw in the old batteries and grab some new ones ( Is that possible Jo> I know we are tossing in old things but is it possible to grab a thing or two on our way out of the fire:) lol!

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited February 2011

    Sandee - Here, anything is possible.  Just don't get burned.  I would hate to have to come and do first aid.  LOL!

  • omaz
    omaz Member Posts: 4,218
    edited February 2011

    I would like to throw in the fact that this 'thing' made my teenage daughter cry so many times and made her worry that she could lose her mom.  I think now she carries that fear deep inside her and it wasn't there before.  I want to pull that fear out of her soul and throw it in the fire.

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited February 2011
    Omaz - Now that just about made me cry.  Daughters should not have to go through something like that.  Life is so unfair sometimes.  But, she has a strong  and determined mom to reassure her.  Give her a big hug from me.
  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 672
    edited February 2011

    Here goes every patent Susan Komen for the Cure has on file for silly mottos.

    And here go the lawsuits they have filed and cease-and-desist letters they have sent to mom-and-pop anti--cancer non profits who use the words "for a cure" in their anti-cancer efforts.

    RUN!!!!!

    The bonfire has just exploded and is huge now!

    Stand back and wait - otherwise we will burn the entire forest. Sorry about that - I should have warned everyone in advance. Tongue out

    Early stage cancer is like crossing the Mafia and getting away with it. You live, but must forever glance over your shoulder.
    Diagnosis: 3/2009, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIb, Grade 3, 3/8 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-

  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 3,696
    edited February 2011

    Oh boy...Omaz..that surely resonated with me!  I have a 27 year old daughter...and appears to be just the opposite of your daughter.  But I do wonder, from time to time, how DOES my diagnosis REALLY affect her.  Outwardly, she's stoic, like me.  I marvel at how she's adjusted to my new normal.  But sometimes I do wonder....

    When I was at the radiologist last week for my 6 month check up...there was this woman older than me, who was the daughter of a breast cancer survivor...her mom died at 80 something of something else...AND YET, she was SO NERVOUS being at the radiologist and has NEVER even had breast cancer.  I asked her if she had a daughter and she said she did.  I told her that I had a daughter too and the last thing I would do is instill in her the fear of getting breast cancer, and heaven forbid, having it and being treated for it.  Since my daughter was little, I took her for MY mammograms and taught her, through my experience, not to fear breast cancer.  Perhaps that's why she's been calm throughout my journey.

    So you know what's going into the fire today...whatever fear I have left in MY core, that might have, one day harmed my daughter. 

    Omaz, I'm sending you and your daughter hugs.  I'm sure you're doing everything you can to instill in her that you'll be around for a very long time.  I hope once you throw HER lingering fears into the fire...you can BOTH get on with enjoying your lives.  Trust me...THAT bonfire is magical!  Go for it!

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited February 2011

    1Athena1- goood visual with the mafia.....that is how I have been feeling all week....think it was an earlier discussion about denial...think I am not in it but seriously do NOT want to think about this 24/7....but yeah....I am more looking two feet ahead of me than behind me with this cancer event....eeeh.

    Omaz- Sorry about your concerns re. your daughter. Having been a daughter of an ill mother, I know that she will be concerned..but I also susect that if you talk to her about it so she is not guessing, she will not be as worried...and if she can do some things that help empower her with it (volunteering, runs, a discussino board for teens?) it will likely be less scary.

    Jo- promise to bring the first aid kit if I div ein to get something new!

  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 47,693
    edited February 2011

    I would like to throw in the statement, "God doesn't give you anything you can't handle." and the lady who completed my wig by saying, "It is as cute as the wig that _____ had before she died." and the lady who complimented me on my chemo curls by saying, "Your hair is so cute; it's a haircut people would just die for." On top of those three I'd like to throw in two big signs that say WTF????? and  REALLY?????????

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited February 2011

    OH Ruth!!! I agree...I have not had to contend with a wig but I can only imagine the looks and comments. Do we really want to hear about people who have died? No...sorry...we don't..not right now. As for God not giving us more than we can handle....really? Is that why Christchurch is dealing with a big earthquake right now? Is that why people in Libya are dying? is that why we are all having parts removed to save our lives? No...don't really think God has anything to do with breast cancer., handleable or otherwise..and I am happy to think that otherwise I would have no faith at all.

    Toss those comments in Ruth!

  • omaz
    omaz Member Posts: 4,218
    edited February 2011

    Thanks, I'll give her a hug today, she is a sweetie!!

    I love the mafia analogy, it's perfect.  And add to what ruthbru said - the lady at the cafeteria at work said to me - 'I love your short hair, you should keep it short so next time people won't notice it's gone so much' - Are you kidding?  Into the fire with THAT comment!!

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited February 2011

    OMAZ- OMG!!!!! Again...people just don't think....

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited February 2011

    Sandee - Don't worry girlfriend.  I won't let anything bad happen to you if you get too close to the fire. It is probably really cold where you are so enjoy the warmth of the fire.

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited February 2011

    Actually, it snowed last night....I was completely oblivious unil I went out, cat in one arm on the way to vet..imagine my surprise!!!! I just drove over the snowbank!!! NOT shovelling this time and spending another $$ on chiro and massage....Thanks for the arm Jo!! Maybe that bonfire will melt the snow here in Halifax!

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited March 2011

    Hadley - You are right.  No one should be treated that way.  Perhaps she was not given the information on patient sensitivity.  May she burn very slow.

  • Sandeeonherown
    Sandeeonherown Member Posts: 1,781
    edited March 2011

    Hadley...EEEH! Can you say sensitivitiy training?? My goodness how do people working iwth the public..and especially with people in case...how can they be so selfish? I think it must just become a ;job' for some of them...or they are so tired of dealing with the complaining side of the process that hey become jaded....toss her in Hadley!

  • sheila888
    sheila888 Member Posts: 9,611
    edited March 2011

    Im here to throw all the stupid statistics about BC.

    GONE

    Good Night

  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 3,696
    edited March 2011

    Seyla888--  Not so fast!!!!  Before you toss those statistics...could you put them in my wheelbarrel and pass them along to me so I can take a peek at them before they get tossed?  I'll gladly burn the "bad" ones, but I'll keep the "good" ones to share at the camp fire!

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited March 2011

    Can I throw in all the conflicting information we are getting from our various doctors?  I just wish they could all be on the same page.

  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 7,605
    edited March 2011
    Are they all men?????? HEY! I'm just sayin'...... Wink
  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited March 2011

    Barbe - Probably not - just an assumption on my part.  My experience has been when there are unrealistic numbers put out like that -they came from a man. 

  • vivvygirl
    vivvygirl Member Posts: 171
    edited March 2011

    I see the fire is getting low so I have some fuel....boy do I have some fuel!!!!

    My sister is going in and since I now liken her to a witch she will burn for a very long time.

    Yesterday was my birthday and "she" comes around with a card that says

    "Each morning when the day begins, when other friendships fade or end, sisters are forever. Seasons come and seasons go. Summer rains turn into snow but no matter where you live...or how far you go...Sisters are forever" and also a keychain that says "Sisters are cherished friends".

    Now don't get me wrong they are lovely but since my sister hasn't spoken to me since just after my DX 2 years ago, and she lives only 5 minutes away I am a little puzzled.  And this isn't the first time she has done the 2 year silent treatment on me.

    It is alright now to be my sister/friend now that I am better but where was she when I was scared, sad and really needing a friend.

    So in she goes..........

    That feels good!

    Hugs to all

    Viv

  • imbell
    imbell Member Posts: 61
    edited March 2011

    Yay been hanging on to crap for 4 1/2 years. In goes the doc who was quoting death stats before I even got into treatment. All the drugs that didnt work, all the crap I have been storing (like a binder on reconstruction) that is not going to happen. All the frigging tests and the crappy results, All the memories of side effects. I feel rather cleansed now. Way to go.

  • omaz
    omaz Member Posts: 4,218
    edited March 2011

    viv -What was she thinking???

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited March 2011

    Viv - Sounds like my sister.  We are miles apart but there is email and phone service where she lives.  She never had time to take my calls or answer emails.  Her husband died in a tragic one car accident and now she has all the time for me.  

    Come to think of it, in she goes along with yours.  They should be very happy together.

    Whew!  I feel better now. 

  • omaz
    omaz Member Posts: 4,218
    edited March 2011
    immarybell - I am standing with you watching the flames.
  • jsmiley60
    jsmiley60 Member Posts: 31
    edited March 2011

    Viv, that's awful about your sister! I guess people abandon us when they don't know what to do, but a SISTER?! That's wrong!

    I want to throw in the fact that I was recently told I have osteopenia! I am on an AI (which think I'll throw those in too!) Of course the chemo didn't cause the osteopenia or so they say, but with being on the AI, I may have to get treatment for it so I don't move into osteoporosis. I'm throwing the chance of that into the fire too!!

  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 3,696
    edited March 2011

    Osteopenia???? That is such a bullshit word. Made up. My doctor did my bone density test so he could give me the Zometa for prevention of bc recurrence. When the results indicated I had osteopenia... He said every 50 something year old has it. He said they were comparing my bones to a 35 year old's. He told me my bones were healthy...thank you very much. The 85 year old mom of this very healthy boned 50 something year old... Also has osteopenia. Her doctors told her she needed to be treated. Know who is going into the fire... All those doctors who want to treat women with osteopenia... And their bone density testing machines... Can someone give me a hand??? Those machines are heavy, my shoulder still hurts and they must,must, must go into the fire too!

  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 7,545
    edited March 2011
    voraciousreader - Get on the other side of that machine.  I'll help you toss it in along with all the other testing machines that are worthless but costs us out the nose in copays and deductibles.
  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 3,696
    edited March 2011
    Jo...Thanks for offering help.  But with this lousy shoulder of mine...it's going to take a lot more help to get those damn machines into the fire!Kiss
  • voraciousreader
    voraciousreader Member Posts: 3,696
    edited March 2011

    In his terrific book, Overdosed America, Harvard trained physician John Abramson discusses in Chapter 13 all about the Osteopenia/Osteoporosis controversy.  The book is all about how doctors depend on the medical journals to interpret data which influences their patients' treatments.  However, he explains how the statistics behind the studies are achieved and how few physicians truly know how to interpret the statistics in a meaningful way.  I cannot recommend this book enough.  It truly was one of the most important books that I ever read. Looking back, little did I know how important that  statistics course that I took in college would be so important all these years later.

    From his book:

    In 1995, Fosamax, the brand name for alendronate, was the first of the new generation of drugs approved by the FDA for the treatment of osteoporosis. Fosamax works by attaching itself to the surface of bone, interposed between the osteoclasts and the bone the osteoclasts are trying to absorb. Randomized clinical trials of Fosamax published in medical journals show dramatic reductions in the relative risk of hip fracture for women with osteoporosis. In a study published in JAMA in 1998, for example, women with an average age of 68 and a T score of - 2.5 or less who took Fosamax for four years were 56 percent less likely to suffer a hip fracture than women in the control group.

    This sounds like very good news for women with osteoporosis, but how many hip fractures were really prevented? With no drug therapy at all, women with osteoporosis had a 99.5 percent chance of making it through each year without a hip fracture -- pretty good odds. With drug therapy, their odds improved to 99.8 percent. In other words, taking the drugs decreased their risk of hip fracture from 0.5 percent per year to 0.2 percent per year. This tiny decrease in absolute risk translates into the study's reported 56 percent reduction in relative risk. The bottom line is that 81 women with osteoporosis have to take Fosamax for 4.2 years, at a cost of more than $300,000, to prevent one hip fracture. (This benefit does not include a reduction of less serious fractures, including wrist and vertebral fractures. Most vertebral fractures cause no symptoms.)

    [. . . ]

    What about using these drugs to prevent osteoporosis? Fosamax and Actonel were approved by the FDA to treat women with osteopenia based on studies that showed that they significantly increase the bone density of these women. It is important to remember, however, that bone density is only a surrogate end point; the real reason for taking these drugs is to reduce fractures, and hip fractures in particular. The study of Fosamax published in JAMA in 1998 (mentioned earlier) also included women with osteopenia. Did Fosamax reduce their risk of fracture? The results show that the risk of hip fractures actually went up 84 percent with Fosamax treatment.* The risk of wrist fractures increased by about 50 percent (that figure may be statistically significant -- but this can't be determined from the data as presented in the article).

    How can it be that drugs approved for the prevention and treatment of osteoporosis succeed in increasing bone density but have such limited impact on reducing hip fractures? The answer can only inspire awe at Mother Nature's elegance. There are two types of bone. Eighty percent of the body's bone is made up of the hard and dense outer layer called cortical bone. In some areas of the body, bones also have an internal structure of trabecular bone, which works like an organic three-dimensional geodesic dome, providing additional strength in the areas of the skeleton most vulnerable to fracture, such as the hips, wrists, and spine.

    The lacelike structure of trabecular bone creates a much greater surface area than the densely packed cortical bone and therefore allows the former to be more metabolically active when the body needs calcium. Its greater metabolic activity also makes trabecular bone more vulnerable than cortical bone to the changed balance between osteoclast and osteoblast activity. As a result, when bone mass starts to decline in women, trabecular bone is lost more quickly than is cortical bone. Once the architecture of these internal struts is lost, there is no structure left onto which calcium can be added. (See Figure 13-1.) The new bone, formed as a result of taking the osteoporosis drugs, is then formed primarily on the outer part of the bone, the cortical bone. This increases the score on the bone density test but does not necessarily contribute proportionately to fracture resistance.