INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
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Best wishes to you too MammaRay
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I got a partial diagnosis last Wednesday, tomorrow I go to my consultant who will give me the patholgy results. I'm outwardly calm-it's my nature, but my stomach is in knots. I wish it were tomorrow
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Blue, I love Danny Boy. Furry hug-a -bug. Love the snow on him. My Brittanies used to love the snow. I even hung two ring towels holders by each door. They each knew to stay until dried off. They would try to kick up a back paws to have them cleaned off. I thought that amusing. People that visited thought my towel ring holders were odd. I thought them clever. Never had to run for a towel or have them clumped on the floor by the door.
Lover super weather for your cruise. We didn't talk about meeting in Daytona. My plan is to be in Daytona at or about 10 am. Leaving Port st John about 8 am. Call me when you get to Daytona with the address and I will mapquest it. OR give the address to Shep when you are on land and she can relay it.
PICTURES, and more PICTURES. PLease.
MammaR never to early to say Merry Christmas and Blessings to you and yours
Wren and Tapper, there are genetic threads smattered throughout. Not sure how they would help if she's already been dx'd with I'll see if I can find and or remember any
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HELLLOooooooooooooooooooojazzy, Merry Christmas...........Hope all is well with you. Missed you here.
Louis Armstrong for you
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Jazzy followed, by a little Charlie Parker doing his rendition of the same song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrIHEdKa0x0
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Chronic pain, My tag line " Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out shouting "holy crap....what a ride". Makes me happy too
. It's part of me and it's all so what I aspire too. It reminds me to get off my duffus and do more i.e. I'm not done it yet, keep on moving and DO something HahahahEdelC, these are the hardest days. The not knowing what's coming. Once things get moving, it will get better. Kinda. But certainly, better than the limbo you are in now. While you are waiting read this thread nd get some things prepared. It's organizational things. Pick and choose
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/5/topics/748296?page=1
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Hi Edel I left you a mesage over on the thread you started.. Will be thinking of you tomorrow. XXX
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Edel, Welcome and good wishes for a positive pathology result. Once you have a plan, the anxiety will go down a little.
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I can't believe this year is almost over.
I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season, full of people you love.
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aawwww jwoo, bluebirds!
Edel, there will be shock no matter what you are told. And second guessing. And a lot of hindsight you can not use. Aim for sleeping at night, it hits hard, the insomnia with illness and worry. Hahaha, wrong threas to say that on. Keep talking.
Sas, Danny Boy's favourite thing is snow. Here's a good picture of guilty face, he was caught eating snow which freezes his stomach and makes him puke in the night. Oh, no, on iPad,will have to post later.
Thyroid surgeon appt tomorrow morning. I am prepared for them to tell me I am not in a good condition for a surgery like this, could be two to twelve hours depending on vocal chord and nerve involvement. And after haunting my PET CT scans again I see the cancer lymph node was 14.4 SUV in Nov 2016 then 8.0 February 2017. So ibrance reduced it but not gone. Off ibrance April 5. And a scn right before did not mention that cancer node at all. So surgeon will have to call on that detail. How sis I miss this?
Later.
Thanks for the music SAS!
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hi MT,
I am ok but still very broken-hearted after my kids told me they don't want to see me for Christmas and I am not allowed to travel before my surgery January 9.
I have had trouble getting out of bed after that on top of hearing NOTHING from my husband in over a week now because he broke his phone AND computer all at the same time and our kids don't want him talking to me anymore so he won't borrow their phones either.
My unspeakable crime for such utter rejection? I abandoned THEM to stay with my mother and use the same team of doctors for identical breastcancer 3 years ago! They claim I was a lazy mother for trying to rest or failing to keep up their insane schedules on top of a job as I was dying of cancer!!
I'm still trying to face my life one day at a time for now, and I set up the nativity scene on the mantle for mom today. I was never allowed to touch it as a child so it was so funny that I was the only one left to reach it that we had a good laugh.
I go in for surgery bloodwork this afternoon so that's why I can't sleep and have been crying for hours but I do that in private if possible. When it gets to days mom is the only one who I will get up out of bed for.
Crying in public is a bigger embarrassment for me and much harder to go out at all if I know I can't avoid it. Therapy and doctors visits don't count though, if they insist on making me that cold and that uncomfortable I'm not going to spare them my tears!
I am more confidant about my surgery than I have ever been now that I know I am having a skin saving nipple saving double mastectomy January 9. The plan is to save as much tissue as possible and bank the nipples in my abdomen near c section scars for later attachment when implant replaces spacer if tissue is viable. If not she can use other skin to form new ones to attach. Then they will take fat from my bum and belly to fill in around implant so the BEST part is knowing I will wake up NOT flat and that hideous power port GONE from under my skin forever hallelujah!!!
Not sure what size I will be when it's all done but that doesn't really matter to me as long as they will FINALLY be the same size! I'm probably going to wind up a c or little smaller and I am so excited to get the tumors out it makes me happy knowing I will NEVER do chemotherapy again!
I will check in after I get the results and let you know how it all goes!
Thanks for helping me feel cared about enough to share with you all, I've spent so many years being told to shut up it's hard to realize that I can finally be heard. That means more to me than I could ever tell you, bless you
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Well my wish for a White Christmas may come true!!!!!
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Faith in Disbelief - I would cry too. How many children? How old, I missed that post I guess. My daughter moved to the UK and I may never see her in person again. That is sad but I dont think on it much. I have an image of her and her new hubby getting off the jet w their carry ons and that is what I stick with. We get to do FB chat every day and can Skype when she gets an ipad I think. If I can talk. But your story is so different, when they actually turn their backs on you would be just too hard, especially when you are going through all this. You have your mom. Are there others, sisters, brothers, relatives or close friends?
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Just wanted to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas
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Love the card! Merry Christmas to you.
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great card, chance
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good card.
I posted this on Steamroom by accident. Am sleeping better. Today until 1pm. More daylight hours are the goal.
posted on Stroom.... Am trying to flip my wrong schedule, have been going to bed at dawn then sleeping until dusk. So took a little hemp oil and 5 mg melatonin. Wanted to wait until it kicked in so did the spider solitaire puzzle for day. After 14 attempts I finally got it in 113 moves, all else didn't win at all. Usually get it in 1 or 2 tries. So maybe the melatonin had kicked in father quickly. Ya think?
Was on FB posting this story, happy holidays and enjoy these.
Pet Skunk for Christmas? Tie mine, please.....
https://skunkiedelight.wordpress.com/2009/12/19/pe...
Pet Skunks A Leaping Christmas Card
https://skunkiedelight.wordpress.com/2008/12/17/tw...
Here's the one of Danny Boy eating snow that I couldn't send from the ipad.....
A relaxing and memorable Holiday weekend to everyone!
Diane
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Happy Holidays to all the owlettes!
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Sas, I like the way you pack away your tree much better.
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I'm leaving my pre-lit fake tree up all year. First year w/o a real one. This is nice too. I just like it too much.
Will sleep well tonight, too tired.
.
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FaithonFire: yes, please do keep us posted.
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Hello to all,
Well I completed my last round of IV antibiotic for the Bacteremia last Monday. Was so happy to get that IV out of my arm. Also, the antibiotic (Rocefan) made me so nauseous. Thankful for the Zofran.
MO took me off the Ibrance for an extra week because my ANC was seriously low (.85). The low ANC and the major whack on my elbow when I tripped over Kirby lead to my little hospital adventure. Who'd a thunk an elbow bump could lead to cellulitis & Bacteremia.
Kirby sitting on my lap at the hospital as I got my IV antibiotics.
Sas - I finally completed the Apron & delivered it today. Whew! I've never been so happy to see a completed project done and gone. That hospital stay really threw off my schedule and I was so worried about disappointing the person who'd asked for the apron.
Here is a pic of the apron, it is made in the team fabric of one of our College Teams here in Oregon.
Tomorrow I need to do some clean up here and maybe a load of laundry, then pack for the trip. Sunday, Kirby's trainer is coming to pick him up and then in the evening I get to go to Christmas Eve service at church. I hope I can sleep on the plane so I can catch up on some much needed sleep.
Kathindc - That is a very clever way to preserve the Christmas tree. Are you and DH going to get to spend Christmas with family?
Bluebird - Is Danny Boy your Newfie? He looks like quite the character.
Just want to say "Merry Christmas!" to everyone and here's hoping you all stay warm and cozy through the holidays. Will be back after the first of the year.
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JunieB, you are so talented. I never got the hang of sewing. Took it in high school. Only thing I mastered was a very basic apron you tie around your waist. Will be going over to our daughter's who is married. Getting a ham from the Honey Baked Ham store and they want stuffing and crab cakes that I make. I'll make pecan pie, a lemon cheesecake that I'm going to concoct for the first time and a rum cream pie. I've already figured out a Christmas gift to my DDs and DS for next year. A hand written cookbook of the recipes they grew up on. Hint, hint. I've been trying to pass the holiday cooking to the girls. Was partly successful for a few years but it is finding its way back to me. One of these times, I may have to leave town. LOL. Hope you have a great trip and Kirby has fun a time at the trainer's!
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Kathindc - My sewing talent is limited to Aprons, Purses, Diaper bags, etc. I DO NOT do clothing. Too stressful because every body is so different and I have never had training in how to adjust patterns to fit well to each person.
Your cooking and baking sound yummy! I used to spend holidays with a friend and her family, but now that she is her sisters full time care giver she isn't able to do the prepping like she used to. Sadly, none of her adult children or grandchildren stepped up to fill in. She is truly the glue of their family.
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It’s morning somewhere
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JunieB - yes, Danny Boy is my Newfie. He's anywhere from 8 1/2 to 10 1/2, we adopted him at around 3 yrs old. I call him Doodles too. And puppy.
Junie - is that a service tag on Kirby's collar? We thought to try and get DB trained but he is excitable sometimes and wouldn't make an easy train and dealing w the cancer limited my strength so it never got done. But he was good in going to nursing homes and he was one of the petting zoo at the Christmas tree farm for a few years when I was well enough to be out in winter. That was all so much fun.
Sewing machines are dangerous around me, they do not cooperate. But I manage to make some stuff that looks like it is suppose to look if not perfect. Organic pillows, diaper bag on hanger, wall quilt for granddaughter's birth. But the machines are lucky to be alive. The apron looks very cool. Now you will get even more orders for just that style, yeah, just what you want.
Hope your arm is still improving. I had a bee sting me under lymphedema arm 6 months after surgery. What a mess. It got stuck when I was gardening, probably after deodorant smell. Go me. That arm took off to 2 dress sizes bigger than other arm. Fortunately, I had been numb and stayed that way from nerve damage from surgery / axillary nodes so except for initial hot sting no other pain, just number.
Ladies, garden without deodorant and keep your armpits covered. LOL
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Jwoo so nice to hear from you, Wish you well, would love to hear from you more, but even a small bit is so welcome. How did that urn work?
Bluebird Oh the Thyroid thing. Not understanding your post . If I had done a dily encounter diary with my endocrine docs. I could write an expose on lieing and false documentation.
How does it hurt me now. The new endocrine doc has their records. AND he says "They did these things, and this was the diagnosis". Multiple levels of lies, I have the pathology reports to prove it. . The pathology reports before they were altered. and then the big wig said he would review the slides. Well he didn't. He entered. the previous docs findings. except that was the lieing doc.
Why do I know this is b/c I have all the records. Page two states that thyroid cancer was found in both lobes. What doc 1 stated in the impression is microCa (one spot). Big wig doc did the same dx. He used the first docs stuff instead of the Quest lab stuff. The quest lab dx was diffuse ca throughout both labs..............Sadly, my world elite big wig doc lied or screwed up. I knew it. AND pondered "how can this hurt me if I fight the situation". I decided to let it go. I got a new endocrine doc last 6 months. He read to me how the big wig Moffitt guy read my slides and called it microcarcinoma. AND B/Cof that he wanted to alter my treatment.
*^%#!!)(
Sorry, got writing and it lead to all the fake stuff docs write, that then lead to screwed up treatment.
No energy to do it or credentials(not a BSN). I could make a lot of money as an expert medical detective nurse. It's a subspecialty of nursing now.
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Blue, Totally love Danny Boy. Wish he didn't puke after eating snow. But What a great dog.
. Leaving the tree up all year. Our front room wasn't used except at holidays. The boys had increasing objections about set-up. I said let's leave it sset up and then just decorate. That got more irritating over the years. They found no fun in it. I did love the sons statement in exasperation "Each ornament has a story"/ I said "Now you get it"
But good or bad I found a solution. The Tree stands in the living room. I had a "dress" made for it. It's like an Austrian ballroom dress. Generally , comes off T-day. and put back on whenever I decide.
The tree underneath is totally decorated. Takes a few minutes to take off the dress. I hang it in the spare room when it's off.
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JUnie, enjoyed our talk, now catching up on IT. Kirby looked great in the hospital. How did you take care of potting? That apron thing per our conversation should be deductible on your incomtaxes hahah because you truly made no money on it. But you are such a good person. Sure hope the husband realizes he was essentially getting for under cost. and gives you a great big tip.
Kathindic great idea on the cookbook. There is a Blank cookbook on the net. I started with one years (30 some) ago. I checked it's availability awhile ago. The blank books can be found. Look for "From Love from My Kitchen" The Paint Box Studio Press Hopkins, Minnesota. Copyright Nancy Radcliffe Edwards. She did this, but it wasn't sustainable and she went out of business.
It was a bummer. It was a very nice book with dividers for all things. My own book now is held together with two rubberbands because I would stuff it with other recipes.
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