Single life after a mastectomy
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hi. Still didn't heard from my family Dr. Secretary she is supposed to find me an appointment with an allergy Dr. My hair is getting back to normal as soon as I stopped the silly shampoo it improved and I stop coloring it light . The coloring dry the hair too much. I am taking biotin again and just glad it stopped falling and I see new grows so that made me happy. I just finished preparing a doc for tmw .I must train two new employees and honestly I am not even sure about some topics. That manager is just an a s s hole but I ll figure it out .
Night I have 6 hours now to get some rest
Hope every body is well
Love u all
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Enerva- glad your hair is stabilizing. I wish you luck training the new people. It sounds like the boss is back to his SOS.
I am so happy with my new shorter hairstyle. After having it for a week and going through styling it myself, sticking my head into a swim cap, etc., it is so easy to deal with and looks great all the time. I am happy with the change.
Got an important lunch meeting today with a partnering firm I have been wanting to work with since March. They may finally be ready. My big client here is not ready for me to help them around something we have been talking about since May. I was told they were but then talking to the VP this week and they are still evaluating internal resources. I kept the door open for the longer term and will say I am okay with this too. I really don't want to go back there quite yet. Will let you know how things turn out as decisions get made.
Thinking of those here going through challenging times. Have a peaceful weekend.
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jazz I am glad you love your new hair style. I wish I had straight hair so I could wear it short. MY curly hair needs to be long in order to control the curls lol
So I got the apoitment with the allergy doctor and it's on Nov 06. Yes welcome to Canada lol here we must wait months to see a specialist.
Unreal
I got my blood test results and all seams to be ok
Not sure why I don't feel 100 percent ok if my blood is good?
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Enevera- ugh on the specialist apt. Well, we have the same thing here in the US, especially in some of the smaller cities like where I live. I have had to wait a good 4 months sometimes to see a specialist. Not true when I needed cancer docs, but for many other things.
I hope you are feeling somewhat better?
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Ha ha ha I like it jazz I ll put it in my face book hahahaha
I have been working on my kitchen sink lol it broke gdi and I call a plumber and he wanted $300 so I told him I ll think about it lol 300 ?seriously lol I asked my brother he said " if there a woman that can do that job it is you" lol he told me what to buy then I thought about it and decided to change the sink all together instead of just replacing the drain part. Now I am waiting for the new sink which I ll get tmw so the weekend I had not sink all I had for food what sandwich lol
Also found a great table for my kitchen cuz I have been with not table for a long time .I got rid of my old table then never replaced it. Found a tall table and it ll look great once all the construction zone is cLear lol
Before
After
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Enerva- glad you are getting some work done on your place. When will the sink be done? I like your new table too.
Simplicity- I think you are getting ready for your surgery this week and wanted to say I will be in your pocket. I hope you are feeling as ready as one can be for something like this. I hope your friend continues to be supportive to you from afar, or if he comes to town to help.
June- I hope you are doing okay. I remember you said you were meeting deadlines for some work recently and hope you are able to get some rest.
BB- hope you are finding your time at the gym enjoyable. What exercises are you liking?
Melp- concerned for you and all you may be going through. Keep in touch with us an let us know how we an help you?
Life- we have not heard from you for awhile and hope you are okay too.
Everyone else, have a good week and into September we go.....
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Morning Ladies! Sorry I haven't been around, I have been lurking thou. Brain and tummy have been a mess. Can't sleep
Yes Jazz. Surgery this Friday
Thank you! I do appreciate it. I am very nervous.I did post a bit here:
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/99/topic/...
I think I am settled on bi. Only being 41, after all this is over, I want as much symmetry and form as possibly close to normal as I can get. I think for the long haul, emotionally, that's best. No option guarantee's anything, so....
Still meeting with the plastic surgeon Tuesday (tomorrow). Wish they had advised me of the surgeons available reconstruction photo's my first visit. You just don't know what to look for and what questions to ask when you start down this road. You also try not to think too far ahead so you don't drive yourself crazy.
My special friend can't make it next weekend
Lots of work going on right now, and I knew he may not be able to make it, so I am good. A bit sad, but good. He is going to try to get here mid Sept. I just want to hold his hand and know he's there. The idea that he wants to, and is still trying to says something to me. He'll make it if/when he can. If not..is what it is.
Enerva-That looks great!! I'm handy, but prefer not to do those types of jobs lol Thank God I have a 21yr old.Jazz-How did your lunch meeting go?
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Simplicity- I am sure you are nervous, there is just no way not to be. I hope your apt goes well tomorrow and wish I could help you more with questions to ask for recon. Have you found any recon threads here to ask advice on questions to ask? You can also create your own post to ask women who have gone through it and ask folks what they wished they had known when they had their apt? I know you won't have much time before tomorrow, but might be worth putting out there for a few ideas before you go to see the PS? Everything happens so fast, there is never enough time to think through everything.
One thing I will suggest after having a couple surgeries in 2012 is to get some home health set up. You will end up with drains and need help with those and the home health folks can assist with that, watch for any issues with the incisions, etc. I had a visiting nurse for several months and it made a huge difference with everything since I live alone. Unless you have someone in the house who can help you all the time (most of us on this thread don't), it is a great way to go......
My other suggestion is to go fill up the fridge and freezer and make your bedroom as comfortable as possible. Ask friends to be available to grocery shop or pick up scrips for you. Many women here speak of sleeping in recliners, I don't have one of those but made a pillow fort in my bed to keep my front protected for months for my various surgeries.
Sorry your friend won't be around this weekend. I hope he calls to check in after the surgery. We need all the support we can get.
Let us know how else we can help you be as ready for this next step as possible? As I am not always on the boards, PM me if you want to as I will see that easier?:
Oh and the luncheon went great. It looks like it is not only the right time to do some work with these folks, there is something they need help with that fits very nicely with a relationship I have been building through one of my prof orgs. Very synchronistic! They don't have a signed work order yet, but hoping with my agreement to do this work they can push it with the client, whom may be glad to hear I am going to be the one helping. Today I should be getting some contract documentation from the prime on the firm. There was an event right afterwards I went to with the woman I had lunch with, where I got to say hello to the new possible client and also reconnect with the pres of this firm I will be working with. It felt like the planets lined up for me on Friday! I hope this one works out, as I am very excited about it. Thank you for asking!
Wishing everyone a good week.
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How did the date go BB?
Quality time with kids is always nice.
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BB- sounds like a nice weekend. How was the date?
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This is for the sister's here who are working so hard to move forward with their lives.
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Lol well well well ladies this was a challenge lol I picked up the new sink after work and got it out of the box made marks to the counter then got my new tools ha ha ha and started curing small pieces first then try and cut again try again and did lots of that till it finally dropped in . My brother told me to drill 4 holes then use a bigger size and drill again so that the wood cutter could fit in the hole then move from there . I must said it was not as bad as I thought . Here are the pictures so far. After I open the corners to make the hole square then I had to add clear silicone and set it with my weights till tmw lol thanks God for youtube hahahhahaha tmw ll continue with the pipes.
As u can see I was under the sink making sure my faucet was in place cuz I had to loosen it up in order to fit the sink.
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Simplicity good luck on Friday. I wish I could have another surgery to fix my rad breast 😢
Bb I am happy you are having some nice dates.
Jazz I forgot to tell you I learned to make the quiches you told us about the other day.
Humm love them.
June life milky hope you are all ok
Good night all
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Enerva- you rock! I am so proud of you for doing that sink yourself! It looks just great!
Oh and I saw your quiches. They are yummy and freeze well too in case you find yourself with too much and want some for later!
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Lol jazz I am exited about the quiches. As soon as my sink is working again I ll make another one lol
I think the harder part is the pipes but got a good explanation from my bro and you tube lol
Should manage ok
Night night all
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Awesome job Enerva!
Why can't you?
Im having rads too but will be a member of the itty bitty titty committee when I do0 -
E - that's pretty awesome....can't believe you're handy like that.
i need to vent....
was having dinner w a girl friend who told me i looked FOB before i cut my hair (3 years ago). i was offended. and i confronted her few days later, and she said she doesn't recall saying it and had no idea that i took the term FOB that negatively in my heart. WTF?!
i googled much and it still is a derogatory term....well my niece who is 20 year old said no though. i found it to be insulting.
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Welcome TXkari. Sorry its under such circumstances. I'm headed in for a BMX this Friday.
Do try to take a few deep breaths. You'll make it through this.
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June- I had not heard FOB before but I am reading it is slang for "fresh off the boat?" Is that right? If so, that is totally racist. I am glad you said something to her. If her response was "I don't remember" vs. I am sorry, not cool. You may not want a friend like that around. Maybe you found out something about your friend you did not know. Sorry sister, so hard to find good company and disappointing when people are unkind to us.
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Simplicity I just feel I have no strength to beg my ps to fix things up. In Canada ps are really not into cosmetic looks so they basically told me I must be happy I am alive don't get me wrong I made them fix me up really good it's just rad made things wrong in the long run and it's not so easy to make them fix it again .😩
hs ha bb. So I installed the drain and was able to pull out the old pipe that was solder to the wall pipe.I managed to cut one piece but it was too hard cuz I couldn't find my tube cuter so I used a small crapy tool lol so I am not done yet due to I need a proper pipe cuter.I ll get one tmw. Here a few more pictures.
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jazzy, BB - yes its fresh off the boat.....it's a derogatory term (not so racist....since only immigrants use it to put each other down) in general as far as i know. even that show caused some mixed feedbacks. the author of the book didn't find it funny from what i've read (briefly).
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BB, a little of both. Ready to get these deceitful murderous bitches off my chest honestly, but a bit worried over recovery.
That guy creeps me out the way you describe him. Stalker?
Glad you went and got your blood work done!! PS: I dont trust my instincts either these days. Fear I may be seeing potential that isn't really there. But, each relationship (friendships are relationships too) is a leap of faith. We confide, we trust. Don't beat yourself up. Were all beautiful disasters lmao
Life? Where are you?
Melp?? Same???
We created an update page on FB for surgery/recovery. If anyone is interested, here's the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/455749534597748/
Not sure how often I will be able to check in
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Hate to hear that Enerva
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BB- good to hear the blood work is okay. If you don't like to drink pure water, make some ice tea with various herbal teas and have that available. Caffeine drinks are dehydrating but herbal teas are a great way to get more water into you. I am drinking a big glass of it myself right now!
I hope the bone density is okay too. If not, ask your MO about Prolia shots. My MO is giving me these to keep my bones stronger given the AIs are pushing me further into osteopenia. I had my second shot in July and will have my next bone density in December. I can let you know how it is working if you are offered it and want to think about it for a bit. I started a thread about the Prolia shot too and been keeping people updated there on my progress.
Needy men are a big turn off. If you tell a man you are dating others and he latches on, it is creepy. Better to move away now. I hope some of the other men can just be present with you and enjoy a nice evening out.
No contract yet, but will call tomorrow to see what the status is. They usually have to put those through whomever they use for legal stuff so my guess it is with them. I will find out what the ETA is. I had lunch with someone today and getting a referral for something else I am very interested in. My guess is it will all happen at once. Feast or famine in my world. Everything is feeling positive right now for a change!
And yes, I was a bit disappointed that the friend did not have the courtesy to let me know her plans had changed for the weekend dinner time zone. She has always been good with me, and so I am not going to hold it against her, but also okay just keeping in touch with her via phone and messages now. Like I mentioned, I don't think we are going to be hanging out together post treatment world.
Simplicity- I joined your private FB group. Will be happy to keep up with you there. I am on a private group with some women who went through internal rads too out there. I keep my bc stuff off the greater FB network for work privacy reasons.
I will say you are a very lovely woman!
Recovery from any of this stuff is not easy, but you got through chemo and you will get through surgery. You just may have to take it easy for awhile. Have you worked it out to be on FMLA for a bit with your job? It will be a relief to be on the other side of this. We will be in your pocket this week. We care here.
June- well, I still don't like the FOB comments. Is the friend that said it of your background or another? I do think sometimes derogatory terms within an ethnicity or race are probably acceptable, but know they are not across various groups. I am very careful to avoid anything like that with people. It sets one up to be on the defensive and makes you wonder what they are really thinking about you? You stay strong girlfriend.
E- I love your sink and plumbing work. What is next on your project list?
Milky, Melp, Life, and everyone else here, I hope you are doing okay. We are here if you want to talk?
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jazzy - love the quote.
she said FOB about my appearance...that i had long straight hair that white men like. basically she said white guys like asian women with long straight hair which only FOB have straight long hair. i have never had a romantic r/s w a white guy though.
she prefers white guys, she's asian.
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June- okay, more context around the situation. Anyways, I still think if someone says something derogatory and you call em on it, it is their job to say sorry. Ever notice how most people don't know that word?
Like Elton John says, sorry seems to be the hardest word.....
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well my pipes are done but guess what? My original problem is still there. The water won't go down 😠which means the plug is somewhere in the building pipes. I must get a wire to flush it through. Anyway tmw I ll go ask at home depo
Here is the final look.
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Aw. Thanks Jazz. So are you. I saw that & it took my chemo brain a minute lol Yea. FMLA paperwork is done. Applying for a moratorium with my mortgage co as well. Help me get some med bills paid off & it'll help if I have to go on short term disability.
Glad to hear things are looking up at work. Or with work rather. Love the picture btw. I copied it and put in bc group
Enerva-can you come get the butter knife out of my pipes? Lol Wasn't me, I swear
Idk June. It may be the prozac, but peoples comments...well, negative comments are usually more about the other person than they are about the person they're trying to insult. Either way, an apology should have been made. Still hurts feelings.
Not going to work today. Trying to get things ready, thou I don't know what else to do really. Need to hit the drug store for sterile gloves & laxatives. Tj Maxx for more button up jammies & clean house. I get so tired so easy thou. The smallest physical task seems to wear me out! Aggravating. And harder to accomplish things.
Kids leave for dads today until Tues morning. Theyll be here for the bus in the am, but then they're off.
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