Single life after a mastectomy
Comments
-
BB- the whole situation just stinks. I wonder what his wife would think if she knew what he was talking about? He really sounds very dangerous and predatory to me. Please be careful.
0 -
Jazzy, wow, you have quite the array of skills. I have dabbled a bit with the guitar, and plunked on the piano, but really can't play.
Our contract looks like it will probably be December before it gets started too, but at least the other company is no longer waiting on us. It's a slow process, sometimes.
BB, I hope this training course is over, and you can get away from this situation. I totally understand you can't complain without being identified.
Enerva, hoping your family is OK. Check in with us when you can.
Simplicity, my stuff animals are legendary. I even have several I have made myself. My niece (who is a grown up) is assembling quite the collection herself. We are a bad influence on each other. My current bedtime animal is a goofy looking pink fish named Blooper.
Speaking of stuffed animals and the randomness we talked about before, I picked up this guy at the grocery store, squeezed his foot and listened to him recite the lines "Behold, I bring you tidings of great joy..." and ended up crying in the dairy section.
0 -
hi ladies. OK my relatives are all ok very sad and chocked but all ok.
I fear cuz my niece is in lyon alone and I know she is a big fan of going out to bars and restaurants so I spoke to her and she says she is staying home her and all her friends are very sad and worry. All is so sad and so extrange to them since they were never in such situations
I can't believe what is happening but it seems is just the beginning
I wish it stops this is just brutal.
I must also say I wish all those countries in war could be ok I am sorry but I see this is just the result of all the war going on in those countries which I rather not even mention I feel bad for all the innocents there as well as the innocents in france and all over the world .
Now france saying this is war
What ll happen next
0 -
Cubbie- hugs on crying in the dairy section. When I hear things like great tidings and joy, my response is often "really when?" or more often "bite me." I know I shared I was emotionally sensitive for a long time after treatment. I hope you realize you are not alone with this response, although you may feel like it in your immediate surroundings.
You only do the AIs next right, no chemo or rads? Or is that still up in the air? Hugs sister, this crap is tough on a person, be super kind to yourself. Lots of quiet time, warm baths, etc. You are still healing from surgery, working too, etc. I hope your family is supporting you well through this too?
E- I am glad your family is okay. I thought they were in the south of France, but you never know when anybody could be somewhere else. The french live such free unencumbered lives, that they have no frame of reference around this. France is pissed and they won't be nice about this. I am glad they are staying safe.
I am sad, angry and trying not to feel fearful, but the world does feel very unfriendly right now.
0 -
Enerva, I'm grateful your family and their friends are safe. I don't know what the solution is to this problem.
Jazzy, thanks. I find it helps to talk about these moments with people who have been there. I think I was crying because it reminds me of watching that special when I was a kid, and how life was just so much simpler back then. Which is funny, because parts of my childhood were actually pretty doggone complicated, but as a kid I was better at setting stuff aside and trusting that things would work out. Adults always worried too much! Of course, now I understand why they worried so much.
It looks like I will not being doing chemo (Oncotype 15, MO said no benefit in my case) but my team is recommending radiation because of the micromet in my sentinel node. I'm getting a second opinion from the state university hospital before agreeing to radiation, because ALND is also an option that was discussed. From what I understand, the treatment of micromets is a new and evolving area, so I want to make sure we are on the right track before I make a decision. Eventually, we'll get to hormone suppression, but I'm not sure what it will involve - might be Tamoxifen, might be ooph and AIs. There are a lot of options to consider since I'm premenopausal and likely to stay that way for many years given family history of late menopause. So everything is still very much up in the air.
I don't have a lot of family in town. I've been trying to be careful not to rely too much on the family members I do have here, as I'm sure this has been very stressful for them as well. It's a shame so many people live elsewhere, particularly my cousins who were both diagnosed a couple of years ago.
0 -
Cubbie- I think getting a second opinion about the rads treatment is a good move. Have you found anything on bco about micromets and treatment? If not, you might want to create your own post to see if there are any other women who have had the same scenario and what they did? As you know, other women sometimes help us the most around this stuff with questions to ask around decisions we have to make.
I don't have family where I live either. I depended on friends for things when I needed them. But that has also typically been true for me with anything in life. Anyone who can help without trying to judge or control your situation is a keeper.
0 -
Morning ladies.
O Cubbie. I feel ya. Went to Lowes yesterday and hit on the cute guy in front of me (my mouth starts before my brain realizes what is happening lol). Anyway, soon as I got in my car, tears. I don't even know why. I was heading to a friends and knew it would be good for me. I'd either end up pouring my heart out with frustrations or not. I didn't as they had so much going on and my 2 honorary nieces keep ya so busy. Had a great visit. My BFF's old dog is dying
Thinking of heading back down and taking her her favorite ice cream. Not sure if snoopy made it through the night or not. Known this lady and her family for 25yrs? Very special to me. My mom was a bit physically abusive with me in my teen years once I moved to NC and that's the house or people I would run to. (She stopped btw. Was recovering then from alcohol addiction and had soooo much going on in her own life and then suddenly, bam, exh throws her another teenager without warning). Not making excuses but my mom has done a 180 over the course. Anyhow, yes, as Jazzy says be kind to yourself. This is not an easy rd. were here for you
If you're close to NC, you're welcome here anytime! Doors are open!
Hope all have a great day. No plans here but to relax and sleep unless I head down there. Poor snoopy tried to get up and made a mess and got all her water all over her. So I cleaned up the mess while my friend cuddled her. She never had kids, raised her nieces for a bit, and she adopts senior dogs to give them some good years, those are her babies. Felt like it was the only thing I could do to help
Here she was apologizing for not being more supportive. She has so much life going on. Always has. No worries here. None at all. Love her regardless. Always will Ugh. Rambling. Haha
0 -
hi happy Sunday. I must go back a few pages I am a bit lost. Hope all feeling better soon.
Wow simplicity helping you dear friend with loosing snoopy
hugs your way.I couldn't sleep and ended up crying over watching a horse documentary which is my favorite. No sure why but I am so intrigued by those criatures
Sending g u all hugs I have to try to study since is my last full day.
Yesterday I worked from home all afternoon and it sucks.
Weather is clear but 5 so no so warm.
Love u all
0 -
Hi ladies- sounds like everybody is wading through the weekend.
I have been feeling so burned out on the violence in the world. We have had a lot of bad things going on locally from people being shot and killed (including 4 year old a few weeks ago from a road rage incident) to the murders in France (let's call that for what it is). I cannot even begin to imagine what it would be like to grow up with some of the things people do in active war torn countries. I cried for all those people that died on Friday.
But then yesterday, I went to a Habitat for Humanity annual fundraiser breakfast with a friend who bought a table. I watched a room filled with several hundred people contributing to their challenge of raising $60K. As I looked around, and watched different teams get up to talk about what they do, and also listened to a Habitat family who talked about how having safe housing changed their lives, I felt hope. It reminded me that there are a lot of good people in the world. The news is filled with all the bad stuff, but it felt good to be sitting in a room with all those kind people.
I am working on evaluating some of the ACA plans on the exchange so I can apply for new insurance in 2016. My current health insurance carrier, BSBC, is opting out of the NM ACA exchange for next year. Some of the plans have been delayed from being hosted until today (one carrier I am most interested in still not there). Going to try to get this figured out this week and perhaps with a few phone calls to confirm coverage with the most important players. Checking specialists, special medications I need like Prolia shots, imaging center, and more. This year will be time consuming, but hopefully if I like the new carrier this year, I will just choose another plan for 2017. It is getting harder to find doctors in network as the people on the exchange are doing HMO only here now.
BB- your hair sounds nice. Good to be grateful for the things that we can see improving.
E- what was the horse documentary? You had to work when you were on vacation? That sucks.
Simp- your day with your friends sounded nice. Hope your skin is healing from the rads.
Cubbie- I hope your day is better.
We have storms moving in so today will be a home day, outside of a trip to the gym this afternoon.
Wishing everybody less tears and more joy
0 -
BB- I agree about the refugees. Already having countries turning them away. Now it will be worse.
0 -
Jazzy, I do have a thread about treating micromets in the Stage II forum. I've had some women offer their experiences, and point me toward studies. Their doctors also chose radiation, which aligns with the recommendations I'm getting from my team, which makes me feel like we are on the right track. The only reason I hesitate is because the treatment of micromets is so new, and my MO was originally leaning toward ALND. I'll feel more confident in my decision, whatever it is, with a second opinion.
Evaluating ACA plans sounds like a big job. I am really grateful for my employer's insurance plan, and all the work they did to find a suitable carrier for us.
There is a lot of good in the world, it just doesn't make the news. I don't think I'll ever understand the hate that these individuals have for people they have never met.
Simplicity, I'm sorry to hear about your friend's dog. My niece and nephew's dog is now 14, and I know I will miss her when she is gone, even though she is possibly the least friendly dog in the history of dogs. Just totally disinterested in people. We pet her anyway, and she just sort of puts up with us.
BB, it is a roller coaster, isn't it?
Enerva, hope your studying is going well, and you sleep better tonight.
0 -
hi .well today it was hard I spent lots of time stuck on a few problems which I couldn't figure out the correct answer
Ll continue to study every night this coming few days.
Regarding france well I also feel terrible for the innocents in siria and all over the middle east were there is war. The problem is that there is no balance in the world . Here our restaurants waist so much food which people who can afford it go and have a small bite them don't finish or I know of the muffin places which must get rid of the muffin from the morning and then there are countries where children, elderly and adults go to bed empty stomach. Or have no roof due to an attack . No I a gree it's just a cruel place. In a way I am glad I don't believe in anything cuz I feel when my time comes I ll be glad to just be extinct
No worth to be reborn in this messy world
My niece send me a picture n I thought Humm I don't even pray
Here I ll share it.
I am not even sure I ll pass My exam I read it seems it goes in and out
G night
0 -
i am so sorry everyone, somehow I lost this thread.......
I stopped taking anti hormonals as felt so awful on it, now feel lots better but still low mood at times tho I can do a lot more,and tho I have new nes in cupboard can't get myself to take them. Part f me feels if I don't I mght get it all over with sooner, I really struggle with how isolated and different frim "normal" people i feel and even if i talk to them they just don't get it, or want to get i
0 -
Enerva! That was a profound article! I posted it on my FB page! xoxo
0 -
hi , I am back on the train
Lili I am so happy you found us again please stay here we are crazy and we love you
I must tell you I am the most crazy here I was stage 3a and I refuse to let them take my ovaries and also refused to take tamoxifen or any other drug it's been over 2 years and I am OK
What ever you decide do not put your brain through more stress by thinking if u do this or not bc cancer ll come back. The way I see it if c needs to be back to me it will no matter what I take. I was healthy before bc I exercised I eat healthy food I did not drink stopped smoking at 20 only smoked a few years on and off like those casual kids that smoke to fit in lol
I just want you to focus on something like coloring or yoga or anything that you can learn and do at ur place so your mind gets busy with other than this crap. That is how I got through this hell by studying and crochet and what ever I could think of to avoid thinking of the unknown
Wish u a better day today to all of you.
Jazz the documentary is the same I gave u before I just love it so much sometimes if I need to cry or to dream I watch it again lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQUMAJCh1fA&sns=em
Sent from my Samsung device
Hope u all like it
Talk soon
0 -
Morning ladies!
BB- my hair is doing good and coming back in nicely. I need to go to a barber and have them clean it up a bit around the ears and neck line. I am hairier than before lol Glad you took some time for yourself and played with your hair. I think I am going to keep mine short. All those years of fighting the long, thick, curly hair? This is so much nicer and easier!
Jazzy-That sounds like a good time. Always feels good to be surrounded with positivity!
E- I love horses too! 5 years of equine assisted therapy with the kids and was around them a bit as a kid too. Very intellectual, empathetic creatures! Funny story, I included the ex in EAT for a bit (stupid), and the last time he was there, he was talking negatively, not yelling or anything, just bad, ugly talk. We were all in a circle talking, so there were about 9 of us, the therapist, equine specialist, a therapist in training, my ex, my kids and I. No horses around at the time. Anyway, he keeps talking badly, aggressively, and the largest horse on the farm (Big John), comes running up from the other end of the field and and places himself right in the middle of the circle. Short pause. Hm. Ex keeps talking, Big John isolates him and my oldest from the group with his massive body (a horse wants to stand where your standing, you move haha). Short pause again. Therapist is saying "he is trying to tell us something". Ex starts up again because all these short pauses were interruptions by the horse. So ex, non aggressively, but while talking ugly, goes to put his hand on my oldest sons shoulder, Big John turned in such a way and so fast that he smacked my ex right across the face with his tail!!! Bwahahahahaha!! I never laughed so hard in my life!! Therapist say "Ex, I think Big John is telling you to shut up" lol
Cubbie-Snoopy made it through the night. My friend is now wondering if she had a small stroke. She was up and walking around yesterday, but in circles
And couldn't keep her head up or straight. They become a part of us. Hoping you feel at ease with whatever decision you make. That is the biggest thing. You have to be ok with it once you decide. Research. And once you decide, stop researching. Don't second guess yourself. Know that you're making the best decision you can with what information you can find.E- I agree. And very little acceptance for indifference. I try to post happy news on my FB. A friend and I are supposed to start a "Good News" FB but we only talk about it while drinking. We fix all the worlds problems while drinking...love for her to be into it sober lol I don't even watch the news. Too much negativity for me. I like to be connected, but would rather be connected and up to date on world events if I can see both good and bad. So I browse Reddit a lot
Hope the studying has gone well.BB-So you have to go to this class until the end of the month?
Hi Lily! I don't know what my 'normal' was or is anymore, and doubt I'll be able to find it after all this. Sucks we have to adjust to a new normal. But I know what you mean. I am putting off calling my father cause his response to any half ass complaints from me are "life is what happens while making other plans" over and over. That and it could be worse
No shit.BB- You lost hair on hormonal treatment? Oh no. Never heard of that! What helped me was getting out everyday. MAKING myself go somewhere. The grocery store was and is my go to when I NEED to get out. I can just walk around aimlessly haha
Chevy, I saw another one that went into even more detail. I'll see if I can find it. Hope you are well today!
My rad burns under my arm are so bad they gave me today and tomorrow off! Looks like it is about to give way/tear in two areas. The skin is a pasty black and wrinkled
Hurts so bad. They gave me some radiagel sheets (a whole box) but unless you are laying down, the area gets too hot and melts the gel causing the sheets to slide here, there and everywhere. Ugh. PT today and we won't be able to do anything with my right side. Not with the skin the way it is
Anyway, sent a wonder bread picture to SP yesterday because of an inside joke we had. He replied 'sweet', so...It's a friendship I don't want to let go of. At this point in my life, I would much rather hold onto the people I feel are good for my soul. I don't want to let 3yrs of good friendship go down the tubes cause of a disagreement.
Romantically/intimately, how he handled the disagreement definitely changes my thoughts about him and any lovey possibilities. I do love him. But I do see more than I did before. It just stinks cause the little shimmers he has shown me, inside that steel door, are beautiful!! I want to see it in it's fully glory
Hope all have a great day! I have rambled enough for now haha
0 -
Simplicity- glad you heard from your special friend. I had a couple long distance relationships with people I was friends with before we dated. Both demanded in a relatively short time I give up my career and move to where they were (states away). I wished later we had never dated, I lost two friends that would have better remained friends than become lovers.
I hope you guys can keep connected. It was far harder to me to loose those friendships than the short relationships I had with both that was not the right fit for any of us.
Hoping your skin can have some recovery time.
E- thanks for the video again. I watched part of it but need to finish it. We should all buy a ranch (we need that winning lottery ticket!)
BB- hugs sister. I hope you survived the awful training today.
Lilly- hugs to you as well. I wonder if things have changed for you where you live as a result of the attacks in Paris? The EU seems to be on total alert now.
Getting our first winter snow storm today.
0 -
BB- I had them bad right after my hysterectomy and then when I went on the AIs. Did you change anything recently like a med that could have changed things up? When do you see the MO again, anytime soon!
I made all my remaining apts for my next follow up today. Back into the zone in late January, but have them all within a week so I get it over with.
0 -
BB- I really feel it worse in the summer months. When it is hot here, I am really not too comfortable. I still get them now, but am just used to adjusting. I have a friend who is permanently hot in menopause and wears tank tops year round, including during the cold of winter.
My docs always ask me about my hot flashes and if they are a problem for me. I tell them I have just learned to cope with them, like everything else on this fun filled ride.......
0 -
Lily, please try the other medication. I know some people have switched to a different medication and felt much better, like BB. We are all different.
Simplicity, I love that story. Big John sounds like a leader who knows a problem with his "human herd" when he sees one, and knows what to do with a troublemaker. Poor Snoopy. I hope she is comfortable.
Your rad burns sound painful - ouch. Hope it feels better soon.
Jazzy, I've had the "guy who wants you to drop everything and move where he is" too. The irony is that he had a generic customer service job and if anybody could have moved, it was him. Told him there was no way I was moving while my niece and nephew were still kids.
0 -
jazz you must watch the entire documentary cuz the best part is after the first half . You will be amazed at what is in it.
OK have a great day all
I am on the train
Had to work a few hours last night from home again
Yes we need the lotto for sure I ll love a ranch with all of u in it
0 -
jazz you must watch the entire documentary cuz the best part is after the first half . You will be amazed at what is in it.
OK have a great day all
I am on the train
Had to work a few hours last night from home again
Yes we need the lotto for sure I ll love a ranch with all of u in it
0 -
I just saw this is our funny tread lol
0 -
Morning Ladies!
Thanks Jazz, but I am going to try not to worry about it anymore. I looked through all our correspondence since my last visit, and I was typically the one initiating contact, conversations. It's a pattern with me that I need to put a stop to. Part of the co-dependent feature I suppose. Either way, I tend to reach for people who aren't reaching back. SP and I had talked about this before, and I cannot get into another situation like that; friend, lover, whatever. I need to put me first more. And I need people that are going to reach for me as much as I reach for them. Actions. Not words.
BB- I have terrible hot flashes too. Daytime, nighttime. Worse during the night and the day spells hit without notice and I can't strip layers fast enough haha I hope you are doing ok through the training.
Cubbie, it was the funniest damn thing I had ever seen. Naturally, we all laughed except for the ex
Neither him nor I could move. Not for another 4 yrs anyway, and I was willing to move but only for something that was already working. I won't move hoping something works out. Uh uh.
Either way, 4 more years, and my tail is out of this town. It's my ex's town, not mine. And I have just never 'fit in' anywhere really. I want to be on a river somewhere with a bit of land. Preferrably the New River. Get me some 1 or 2 goats, maybe a horse and some chickens
Cubbie, they are very sore. My skin under my arm is giving way. I now know what they meant by paper mache skin
Rubbing my medicine on, the skin wants to go right with the rubbing. Gotta be careful but also have to get the meds on for relief. Ugh.BB-hope the fatigue improves. Mine hasn't really. Really didn't want to come to work today, but starting rad's back tomorrow, and betting I am going to be in more pain come Thursday morning than I already am.
Hey E! How is the studying going? I'll have to look back for your link. Love the meme!!
Sorry I sound so....angry this morning. I am thou. Angry over a lot of things to do with FRB. Kids are gone for a few tonight, and I get to see a dear friend during her maintenance chemo this morning. Trying to decide what to bring to make her smile. She won't tell me, naturally, of anything she'd like; lunch, a milk shake...So I am thinking of just picking her up some flowers maybe?
Hope all have a great day!
0 -
Thanks BB. I'll be okay. May be a few days lol I am just tired of all this. Wearing me down a bit.
0 -
hey pls go back and watch the video. It's amazing
Simplicity can I come to the river home?
That what I have wanted for years
0 -
Good morning ladies- it is still feeling like winter this morning after two days of moisture, including snow yesterday. Our first storm of the season, and it was a good one too! We love moisture here in the desert, and fortunately I did not have to drive anywhere yesterday. The weather has moved on east, but the winds and cold are still here. I will be getting out today.
I think I found a great option for new insurance that won't have me dealing with the ACA HMO plans. One of the carriers here I am interested in has plans for a business like mine (1 employee) that will allow me the type of health plan I really need. It will give me the choice for a PPO which will allow for a choice of any doctors and facilities vs. having to go through the contracted HMO plans. What does that mean? Most of the ACA plans included more restricted docs, facilities, meds, etc. I found that with some plans, some of my cancer docs are not there, or my imaging center, or the Prolia shots for my bone health against the AIs is not available. I really need a PPO option and this may be my solution. The guy on the phone yesterday told me of these new employer group plans that are available for a business of one, and I am reviewing those options today and going to call him for some quotes. Wish me luck.
E- I will watch that video when I can! That cracked me up about the 8 inch comment.
Cubbie & BB- I think it is common for men to expect women to give up their lives to be with them. I have seen women give up much to be in a relationship from selling a home, to moving somewhere where they could not get a job, leaving a close community of family and friends behind, etc. I have also seen people move for another person (male or female) and it worked out well. I think the person who is being expected to move needs to just understand what they are moving into an/or giving up by leaving. I never had any regrets not moving for the men that asked me and oh by the way, one talked of marraige but the other really just wanted to live together. There was not that much of a commitment there to even consider it. Like Beyonce says, if you like it, you better put a ring on it!
BB- I hope you can get to the root of the fatigue. You have talked about it before and know it is disabling for you. Thyroid problems are common as we age, and think made worse by the rest of this stuff. Let us know what you find out!
Life- how are you doing friend?
I hope everyone else here is doing okay this week.
0 -
took Femara for 14 months or so,then Aromasin for about two years, have Arimidex sitting in cupboard.........
0 -
bb watch it it is not that bad I think I cry cuz I love those creatures and I would give anything to have one lol
0 -
evening everyone!
Jazz-Good luck with the insurance! I am insurance ignorant. I have BCBS through the state and so far they've done good but I'm still in the hole
I pay what I can. All I can do. I'd hate to have to change dr's. Course I've never been a 'regular patient' as this is my first 'career' and salaried job. I never thought about the future until I had to. Losing my retail job of 7 yrs right after buying my first/only home, sigh, couldn't change the single parent part (part of why they let me go), but I could change the lack of of computer skills. So back to college I went E-Of course you can come!! I get so excited thinking about it! I've been checking out land in the mountains here for quite a few years. Keeping my eyes open but now there FRB:( I have a great mortgage, but this place needs some tlc before I can sell it. I can't go bak to Wa because I'd be trying to go bak to a time, people and place(s) that aren't the same anymore, naturally. Plus my family over there is soooooo screwed up! Maybe a blessing in disguise that my dad sent me away Ha. I truly believe that. Check this place out E. If only I old win that lottery. Have to change that 1 bathroom situation thou. http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/5967-N-Old-Hwy-1...
BB- Hope you're feeling a bit better. You get some rest? Past 2 days I have come home and gotten in bed. PT after work yesterday and that just wears me out and makes me sore. She just digs at the cords which feels good while shes doing it but ugh. Not so much after wards. Couldn't work on the right side because of the burns
I'm going to miss PT. Those massages feltso freaking good! Not sure. Have to check with them tomorrow. Dr said something about a Sunday treatment? And the only way I can get done before Thanksgiving is to go everyday from tomorrow to next Wed If so, that's going to suck. So bad. Idk how women do this. This is insane. My skin is holding up so far today. There's one open spot about the size of a pinky nail. The rest the area under the arm is holding but trying to give way when I rub my medicine on. The Radiagel gel sheets really help but I have to be laying down and still. Ha. So that's been me after work the past 2 days. O well. They slide around once the heat from the rad burns heats them up lol Kind of comical.
Got to go sit with a friend and visit today during her maintenance chemo. That was so nice. We would talk while I was chemo in and kept in touch (I've met so many new friends along this road). Took her some flowers and blue berry muffins
Wanted to make her smile. She's a lifer but remains in good spirits. Also got to see another chemo friend that I didn't know was going to be there. She's a lifer too and like my other friend, remains in good spirits. These women....such strength. Courage. Another friend of mine, a lifer also, decided a couple weeks ago he couldn't take any more chemo That hit me harder than I expected when I heard and talking about him today...*sigh* My friend sent me a pic of him on my last day of chemo when we all, a bunch of us patients and family, played with the wigs and head gear in the ward. Such a fun day. Laughs. Laughs everywhere. I need to,slide over and check on our other friends in the other threads. Just been so tired and worn down.
Sorry so long. Haha. Hope all have a good night.
0
