Single life after a mastectomy
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Appointment was a bit of a stuff up. Waited ages and then registrar said the private firm that they sent me to for the ct couldnt access the hospital's files to compare the current scan they did with the one three months ago that I had at the hospital but hospital can see their files. that needs to be fixed then at the multi disciplinary meeting on monday the hospitals radiologists will get the two scans together and look at them. Jones and partners wrote a long description of what I already have there which was no help..the registrar didnt know why that happened but when they work it out he will ring my dad if anything severe comes out of the meeting on Monday. Suppose if Jones and partners saw anything alarming on their scan they would have notified someone well before today (had the scan last Monday). So seeing the onc again to get real results this time next Friday. So basically after today they dont know if tumours have grown since the scan in april or not...
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Melp- what a stupid cluster those people are. I am so sorry you could not get the answers you need today and have to now wait until next Friday. If you are with your mom, maybe you can just go enjoy a nice meal together and have some family time. Sometimes the best thing we can do to salvage a botched apt is to go enjoy life. Easier said than done sister, but sending you super big hugs today. I am sorry.
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I think there should be a "None of the Above" button in all voting booths.
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hi all I have been drawing some more lol
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great drawings Enerva!
I fell asleep at 7pm last night!!! In our city we have a huge event called the Calgary Stampede... And it started today and goes the next 10 days. We are one of the biggest sponsors, and so I am hosting people near every day. Today was the first day I was dressed up and standing/put for almost 7 hours. Thankfully they provide me a driver so I don't have to worry about that- but exhausting. It's usually a total party with a lot of alcohol and partying for 14 hours a day with the only concern of a hangover- so this year is a bit different! I had a glass of wine yesterday (ok... Two- but didn't take so much as an Advil so it was fine).. And it was delicious! Haha first glass in almost 3 weeks!
I have invited the ex to be my support at two events later this week,., he was so thrilled I asked- to corporate dinner hosting gigs- in case I get tired and need help walking to the car etc... I hope he does ok at them. He has been working on some of his issues- doing more counselling etc- but still isn't allowing medication to be part of his solution, so I hope he can manage things- because just one episode of stress, and I'm out.
Upon getting home last night my BS called me because we had both been anxiously been waiting for my final pathology. (It was after hours but he knew I was going crazy waiting- so nice of him to call)...As we thought, my IDC in the left breast was just over the 3 cm, and my lymph nodes were clear.... But what neither of us expected was, they found DCIS in my right breast. I'm so thankful I went with a BMX because had I not, we would have been letting that tumor grow.
Now I await the call from my oncology team to arrange an appointment to discuss my chemo plan. I qualify for oncotypeDX testing (in Canada you have to meet certain parameters based on final pathology to qualify for test due to its cost)... So I'm hoping to get good results there and gave some less intense regimes available to me. (Hoping for CMF or a low cycle number FEC. We will see!
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Hope- you sound like you are doing well although the things going on in your location sound pretty tiring. I hope you can pace yourself through your recovery and not overdo. Glad your ex is trying to get some things sorted out too. I am not sure why those with bi-polar are so resistant to medications, but know many stories of this from my own family. I somehow thing the medication is an acceptance of what is really going on, and no one wants this diagnosis. I hope he continues to get well and that you do as well.
My initial dx was a very small area of DCIS/IDC on the left and with the MRI on the other breast, DCIS turned up. My BS told me bilateral is highly unusual, often genetic and put me through a lot of genetics tests the past few years. No findings and won't do any more of them either. Anyways, I had the OncoType on both sides and my DCIS was low (12) and the IDC was intermediate (23). Above 30 they recommend chemo but in the middle, when I went through this almost 4 years ago now, there was a trial on the intermediate zone called the TailorX trial to see if benefits. That study is now done per the link below and might be helpful with your discussion.
http://www.cancer.gov/types/breast/research/tailor...
Women who are node positive and/or HER2 positive will usually have chemo as a must do. Women who have it localized to the breast without that HER2 will often have more options with the Oncotype scores. My MO thought I would be over-treating my BC if I did chemo, but said some women choose aggressive treatment, especially if they have young families, etc. That was no my case so I had surgery, rads and been doing the AIs for 3 plus years. My hope is that your tests will be such that you won't have to do chemo either.
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hi all bb I had no idea you must do some for fun and maybe sell them for small income?
Hope I wish I was in Calgary for that event I love horses and caws lol
But not sure I could like it due to I don't like seen the animals treated with any kind of force not sure how is a stampede lol
I also hope u don't have to do chemo. Yes same here I had in both breast so my MO were alarmed specially cuz they only check my left cuz I literally demanded. They did not even want to check
and told me I was right and so like Jazz had to do Gen test because they thought my ovaries should go too. Once the Gen test was negative they back off from the ovaries surgery well I kind of refused it.Bb I ll take a figure drawing class I really want to learn to do portraits lol
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E- I loved your drawings! You are so creative and hearing BB is too! I was thinking the same thing, a way to have some income stream from that talent!
I am going to see my friend on Hospice tomorrow morning.
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BB- I have no idea what we will talk about. We have talked about the elephant in the room in the past. I will be ready to do so if he wants to. He may just want to talk about other things though. He is very heavily medicated and may not be able to talk much anyways.
I decided last night I am going to bring my flute and play music. Many years ago, I thought about changing careers to become a music therapist and work at Hospice. There are programs that do that and think music can help with anything, including transition. So that is the gift I will bring this morning. Our mutual friend will be there too, and think we can help each other better that way. We will be with him while his daughter goes to do some things.
His daughter put out the call on FB to let everyone know he is transitioning and to reach out if anyone wants to say their goodbyes. I am glad I can do this, although it will be hard.
Wishing you all a good day.
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My visit went okay. I played my flute and it helped him to relax and fall asleep. A mutual friend was there and we had a good visit while he rested. I am glad I did this, but will say I am emotionally exhausted right about now. With that, I going to take a nap now!
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So on another subject, a friend from the past who I intentionally do not talk to anymore has contacted me again. She is someone from my home town and we were good friends long ago, but it became clear to me as I got older that no matter what was going on, a celebration or someone had passed in my family, she always tried to turn it around to be about her. By the time we were in our mid 40s, it was just done. But alas, that darned Facebook brings those people out of the woodwork (and sometimes repeatedly).
A couple years ago, she contacted and tried to open the door again (the last time I had talked to her, she was trying to get me to host her and her new husband for a visit) so I said "not interested". The death blow to the friendship occurred when my mother became ill and she was once again awful to me. I told myself I could not do it anymore and to just stop any communication with her and I did. That was that, and now she is back again, asking about our former governor Gary Johnson and because I have lived here for so long and probably know something about him, what is the buzz in NM? Well, no one is talking about him here, although he was a good governor. So I have nothing to offer on the subject.
You have to wonder about someone who continues to contact someone about anything knowing they have expressed an interest to not stay in touch?
A lack of response is a response. She can find her political info elsewhere.
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BB- totally agree.
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well to add to that note. My friend from Denver texted me asking if she could visit me for new years . Humm Really?? After my visit to Denver which clearly made me realize she is not a friend I want in my life .... no thanks I responded . No I have plans for the last week of December . The she responded oh I bet you are lying but that's OK lol. I did not respond anymore .
What is it with people you don't want to comunícate or bother visiting anymore yet they feel they can come into your life when ever they please?
Anyway jazz I admire you were so kind to go and visit your friend at the hospi I am sorry he is there
I have some news I finally booked my trip to cancun. Yes I am broke but I really need to go and just hang with the boys and chill get some sun and worry about my bebts later lol I keep telling myself life may end for me and I want to enjoy a nice tan and beach so I am going lol
Will got from August 12 to 26. 2 weeks
I am so exited lol I finally found my passport today which was packed away in a box.
Anyway bb I wish u start your art lol I am so looking forward to taking a class in September lol
G night all sending u love
Simplicity Humm hope you get better soon
Melb I hope they give your results soon too
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Good morning friends- getting ready for another busy day and long day to day with my class tonight and then again on Thursday. I know E knows all about those long days.
E-As someone who lives next door to Colorado, I can say that NYE is not the best time to visit Denver, too much SNOW Your friend does not sound very nice either. Good to say "thanks for the invite, got other plans." You are already live in a place with a cold winter, you want tropical!
And yay about going to Mexico to visit your nephews next month, and have some beach time! That sounds SO awesome. That will help you to restore from the busy year so far and having time with your family is important too. I am happy for you! Go enjoy your trip and forget about the one in CO who you have no interest in anyway. None of us are in the go-out-and-party-all-night-long mode anymore anyways.
Simplicity- did you go away this weekend and if yes, how did that go?
Melp- how are you doing sister? I know you are in "wait mode" again until this friday when you get the outputs of your tests. Keeping positive thoughts that the treatments are continuing to keep the cancer at bay.
Hope- wishing you a good week of continued recovery. Hope you are feeling better every day.
BB- how is your back doing? Wishing you a good week to sister.
Will pop in later this week to say hi and see how everyone is faring. Be kind to yourselves!
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OK I got some crazy but happy news.
So I booked 2 more flights. One for my brother and one for another nephew . Yes one more nephew will go explore cancun and my brother will go with me to see my land and we will explore the possibility of our project to build small cabins so we can go retired there lol
I must say I am extremely broke but u all know how bad the situation is back home and my nephews need to get out before it becomes impossible. My brother will stay 2 weeks same as me but he ll then try to sell the house and some land we have in vzla to then return to Mexico and focus on the project. I am very excited he finally agree to go specially cuz one of the boys who is already in cancun thanks to me is his son only son. So my brother ll be able to see with his own eyes all the potential Mexico has to offer and slowly all my relative may one day go for good. So there that is my news we arrive the same day.I arrive a bit earlier and ll wait for them at the airport.
so happy I finally did my exercises today and started drinking cucumber Lome and give GInger. Lol I must get in shape In 4 weeks lol So so happy I can hardly wait for the days to go by.
Hope all of u are OK
I will be in a bad butget for a wile but all worth it.
Love u all
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E- you have a total family plan working. You sound so happy!
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yes am in wait mode. Hoping all goes well with the results
My mental health is still a daily struggle with my thought life. Im seeing my psychologist more than I was when I first started seeing her last year so that helps me keep accountable.
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Melp- getting support for our emotional well being is a good thing. Seeing your therapist more often is also a positive, it means you are taking very good care of yourself. Sometimes societies see it as a sign of weakness, but it is not. We are often told to stay strong, but that is empty advice. There is no one who is strong every moment of every day. And no one knows what it is like to be a cancer patient and everything we get put through.Things can easily tank us. I am glad to hear you are doing this.
We will be waiting with you for your results and praying for good outcomes. Wishing you a good day sister.
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bosumblues...I feel your pain. In my divorce I spent nearly $60k and took on all our joint debt to simply protect my kids and the assets I came into the marriage with... Then 4 yrs later I spent another 50k fighting off a money hungry leach I dated and subsequently dumped, who wanted to try and profit off our time together and was looking for not only spousal support (we were never married) but a portion of my assets. Men who looked at me as their cash call have cost me dearly... Both emotionally and financially. I was told more than once by people to cut my losses and pay them a lump sum to gave them go away- but I refused to let bad win- and continued to pay lawyers until I was victorious- even if it cost me.
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I am learning to play the steel drums ladies. I started last summer and continuing on this summer and it more fun than I can tell you. You know I love jazz and also find this instrument the most fun to play. So I had to share, hoping it will brighten you day in some small way.
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bossum, the stubborn person in me says hell yeah I would do it again- but truthfully I hope I don't ever allow someone in my life again who would put me in that position! But I will never not stand up for what/who I believe in, and would go down swinging if I needed!
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jazz thanks for sharing love the music.
Meb me too I am hoping for good results.
Hope wow you are so strong to endure the ass hls in the past. I gave up on men. I so wish I had that great love wish some ladies have but I learned that in my case is was just a dream lol
I became too independent and after I pass my 30th I gave up on children and bc made sure that door was closed so I just dream with a small cabin in a perfectplace where I could just chill lol
Today I got a lock for my bicicle and I ll try to ride to work so I get my legs in some kind of shape lol only 4 weeks for my trip I am so so happy I ll have no extra money but will be happy specially now that my brother will be there we are so close. He is 2 years older than me we grew up as if I was a boy too. He is the reason I love motorcycles I was a passager in his bikes when we were teens lol my father past when I was 9 and he was 11. We suffer his lost together and we have been always very close. I will post so many pictures for you all. Here is one from one of my nephews who is in cancun. And one of the cabin I dream off
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trying to post another pic but phone I's not able to lol night night
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Hi ladies- I am on the support group on FB with Simplicity and she was in the hospital with that abcess. She had some tests and medical care and is back home. She wanted me to let you know until she can get here to share more.
BB- I am sorry about the rough day. I do like the "do one nice thing for yourself and then for someone else." I am going to try that too.
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HI yes please let's go all in that little cabin and stay lol I so dream with it
Jazz I draw my first horse u know how much I love those creatures I so wish to learn to draw them one day so here he is for all of you
I am sorry simplicity is having such hard recovery. Wonder if is due to not enough rest .it seems she does so much
Meb thinking of you too.
Hope fingers crossed u get well soon too
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Beautiful E! I do love horses. Go find some to ride on the beach when you get to Mexico!
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hi all
yes I get my results in the morning. Thanks bb for the love
Glad you all are here supporting me.0 -
Melp- we are glad to be here with you to support you through everything. That is what this site is all about! Helping one another in the ways we can. Lots of collective wisdom on these threads. Will be in your pocket today and praying for good outcomes on your tests.
BB- working on the "do something nice for someone else, do something nice for you" you shared yesterday. Maybe we can share those here as we have them to create some positive affirmations in the world for ourselves?
Today I am going to reach out to my hospice friend's daughter to check in and let her know I am here and available to talk if she needs me. I will go to the gym and do a weight work out just for me!
Wishing everyone a good day. I am working from home today (yay!)
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HI is almost mid night here . Hope Melb is OK
Bb yes do something for u pls. May be some drawing ? Or anything that may relax u?
I am super tired just happy is Friday tmw.
Wishing u all a good night
My drawing is improving day by day
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hi all
Checking in. Good news today!! Tumors are stable not larger than the last scan!!! No change to treatment. Next scans in September.
Thankyou for all your love
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