February 2012 Chemo
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Hi Everyone!
I havent posted in awhile but have been reading and sending lots of positve thoughts to everyone!
I have been feeling mostly good so I cant complain. Once I got past that first week of post chemo I started to get some of my energy back... but not all. I go in on Thurs for round 2 and i think i am more apprehensive about it than I was my first time.
The main thing is I have been feeling down. Part of it is the dread of the hair falling out which I know should start any day now. Also I think I have so many wonderful friends and family I get tired of always answering, "how are you?" umm do you want me to be honest or just say "i'm good" I can't complain like i said as I am not feeling really bad just tired but really.. i have this horrible thing called cancer so how am I? It's been kinda easier to stay in my room and play on the computer or read my books. The characters there dont ask me how I am
lol I sound really mean don't I? I know they mean well so I put on a smile and say I'm good. Plus I try to stay positive and upbeat for my kids.For those that just got their port.. It took me awhile to get used to it. I hurt or was uncomfortable for about a week then it was just annoying but it does get better. And trust me when I go each week for treatment and they just stick it in there I dont feel a thing. MUCH better than dealing with feeling like a pin cushion!
I too have been having trouble sleeping but its mainly because I have these crazy vivid dreams or my mind just wont shut off. I have had good success with Tylenol PM though.
I agree with the steriods.. they are a source of trouble! Like gritgirl it gave me acne like I have never seen! I dread having to take them again on Wed.
I also have small bloody noses from all the dryness which I dont get because the Herceptin has my nose dripping like a leaky faucet!
OH! Gritgirl, thats my theme song too! got to love it!
ANYways, I've babbled enough for now. Have a wonderful day everyone!!
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Thanks jap62, at least now I don't feel like I am losing my mine. Went to the facility that put the port in just for them to check if everything is where it's suppose to be. Everything looked fine so I felt like a big baby that's still in pain.... Ohhhhhh boy!!!!. My crazy mine is now thinking the cancer has spread to my lungs/chests/anywhere in that region. Hate feeling like this and not knowing what's wrong. This is just one of those days that I just feel like curling up and crying.
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JAP - I had mine put in 2 weeks ago and my neck, jaw and shoulders were really sore, couldn't figure out why I felt so bad and then remembered that the Doc said they tilt the table back so your head is down to get at your chest better, I think thats why I was so sore.
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Jap ... I will have ACT
First AC dose dense every other week for 8 weeks (4 doses)
then a short break
Then T once a week for 12 weeks
I am in a trial for herceptin with the T. I am waiting to hear if I will actually get the H or if I will be in the control group. If I am slated in the control group I MAY bow out of the study and just do the T every other week for 8 weeks (4 doses). I don't know .... so many decisions.
If I receive the H, then I will get it once a week for 12 weeks and then once every three weeks for an additional 39 weeks (13 additional doses).
Diana
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JenH13, I am going for round 2 tomorrow and although I know what to expect this time, I am feeling apprehensive, too. I did ok after the first week and am hoping this round will be the same, but what if its not? I tell my family(who are very worried for me) that I will be fine, but I'm not sure myself.
I also have the herceptin nose drip! What fun!
Alicea, I had my port put in in mid January and it still bothers me. The port site is sore, like a bruise and if I turn a certain way at night, ouch! The scar is red and sore and I went back to my breast surgeon to make sure it was ok. She said it was fine, but because of my low white cells that healing will just take longer, put neosporin on it for a while.
I'm still counting backwards. I have 6 total treatments, did #6, tomorrow is #5, then 4 more to go.
Judy
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Tod day after supper I had ice cream. and it tasted good. Somtimes its the little things. Much love to all
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By the lack of postings here tonight I suspect we are all feeling under the weather, I know I am. Had a bowl of rice today and water. Slept alot. Going back there now. Hugs everyone
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JudyP I'm having #2 tomorrow also. Feel much more at peace with it after appt with MO today. They are cutting way back on my steroids as my worst SE was headache. Also backing off nausea meds as I didnt really need much. Mostly heartburn. Wishing you the best tomorrow.
I'll be thinking of all getting past TX tomorrow.
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jenH13--i feel the same about answering ppl--do they REALLY want an answer????
ok- so it's 10:45pm and i am just now turning on thecomputer-reason: this morning was my PICC flush at 8 am-no big deal- i got dressed and went-by myself which in itself was way cool considering my shadow wante dto go--but...
i got in my car and the pain started...my lower spine and rear pelvic area-OMG -childbirth for 3 failry good sized babies was not so painful...i drove there- got the flush, did some shopping, went to the library and came home--it only hurt while i was in the car...wtf??????? except that this afternoonand tonite have been torture..i called doc's and asked for a script-tylenol isn't getting it and hubby's vicodin do nothing for me....i'm a percocet person-
funny how our receptors are different even for pain...anyhow- doc's office still hasn'tcalled back so it will be a long nite tho i have a teensy reprieve right now from more tylenol....so we'll just destroy my liver with tylenol!!!!
my heating pad is in storage somewhere- when i go to the pharmacy tomorrow i will buy another.
so my thought is that this is Neulasta...i did take claritin 5 nites but stopped- shoulda done 7???? i'm thinking that this means that it is working???
hope tomorrow is better for all of us.......
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Update:-
Saw my GP yesterday. She is happy with my wound, it's healing up fine. I got a bunch of drugs on prescription just in case I need them next week. I've also started taking Metformin.
This morning I went into hospital for preadmission for my port operation. I'll be back in there on Thursday to get the port installed. And later that afternoon I get my Oncology Dept tour/education.
Tomorrow morning I have my Echo heart scan. After that, I will see what scarves and turbans the NZ Cancer Society has on offer, and also go to a wig shop.
My chemo starts on Monday afternoon. Six sleeps to go...
Fldreamer:-
(((hugs))) I hope you are feeling a bit better today.
First Call:-
Sounds like you'll be all sorted for your next treatment. Thanks for the tips.
mthrdee:-
Ugh, those all sound like things worth whining about. My chemo starts in a few days, and I'm certainly not looking forward to those SEs!
JenH:-
Sometimes I say "I'm fine" even when I'm not, because opening up just doesn't feel right. Maybe I don't feel safe to talk openly with the person, because they are not very empathetic. Or maybe I'm just feeling strong at the moment they ask. It's a funny thing though, because "I'm fine" covers up so many physical and emotional problems!
Lumpynme:-
Oh dear! I'm so sorry you're hurting! (((hugs))) I hope you manage to get some sleep tonight.
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Good Morning everyone. Day 3 since chemo (C-T). Achy, but doing ok. Yesterday was a busy day. I was the race director for our club marathon, with about 130 runners. It was a good day, kept my mind off of my side effects. People were very good to me. One of the runners, who is a leukemia survivor himself, spent the whole day helping me rather than run. When he found out I was in chemo he simply said 'in that case I'm here to help'. Small group, but we had runners from a large area, including Washington, Oregon, BC, Calif, Texax, Wisconsin, and one from Paris. I wanted to run, but I didn't. I was a little light headed, and didn't want to get out on the trail and not be able to get back. Hope everyone is doing well today.
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Galena - good luck to you, you have a very busy week or so ahead of you. Be sure to rest and eat well.
Port placement - ditto so many others here; mine drove me nuts for about a week, very sore! It has been 13 days now and it is much better. In fact my cockatoo jumped on it this weekend !!! and I almost died but to my surprise, it did not hurt. It just feels weird now, and I still hate to have anything much touch it (seat belt, etc.).
Reassured to know I'm not the only one dealing with nosebleeds! I had one Sunday and it was scary, never had one before, and I'm a baby with blood.
Had herceptin #2 yesterday. Went smoothly. Onc changed my protonix to 2x day because my stomach hurts ALL THE TIME, especially in the morning. Already today it is much better, still hurts a little off and on but it is manageable. Pepto Bismol helped me get through yesterday. I think I am getting sores in my mouth; my mouth is sore and my tongue has a couple small pink spots.
Onc confirmed yesterday that my SLN biopsy all came back benign, and I am stage IIa, which was great news because I thought I would be IIb.
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Good Mornig Everyone
Feeling a bit more normal this morning. Slept through the night, no nauseau or anything. I guess my only issue really is a very sore lower back. I'm sure its a combination of sitting/lying around and the neulasta shot. Going to try to get out for a short walk and do some stretching today. Here's hoping that yesterday was my "down" day. Have the nosebleed thing too, just a bit though.
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Just got the call that my SNB was negative
all ready to start on thursday, is the nosebleed from herceptin or something else? hope ya'll start feeling better 0 -
I read the nose bleed stuff is from the herceptin.
I discovered what happens when I push myself past exhaustion. I throw up. Yay.
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well then gritgirl stop that
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another survivor who has been through it told me to act like my good days are still my bad days. as in, rest. and rest lots.
i'm learning.
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JudyP and ConnaDS - Wishing you both an easy time for #2
firstcall - glad to hear things are going ok
Yea to all the negative SNB's - one less thing to worry about.
Gayle
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Day before my 1st chemo, just took my steroids so I'm sure there will be no sleeping for me for a few days. I'm taking the Claritan also for the pains and hope it works, can't hurt anyway. I like reading everyones posts, it helps me to know what to watch out for so I know whats a normal reaction and what isn't, I didn't know about the nose bleeds and a lot of other things apparently. So thanks again for all the advice.
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Hello, all! Still feeling sluggish, and the nosebleed, thing. Not really bleeding, but, dry, unless my nose is running, then its pink! Color coded snot, thanks cancer! LOL Firstcall glad you are double ok. Good to hear. Galena, hang in there, the wait is always bad. Gritgirl, you are strong, but not superhuman! MLB, I didn't take the Claritan, and I was SORRY. I will take it now, live and learn. Jap, good to hear SN nodes clear. Christina, my next Herceptin is Thursday, anything I need to know, fill me in when you can, thanks. Man, with all the nosebleeds, we should buy stock in Kleenex!
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moonflower--omg --i am sorry- i had to LOL at color coded snot! it is not funny yet i just well- only among us i guess!!!!!
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gritgirl; i love that we have been given permission by those who went before us--to rest and rest some more!! i love it!! cuz it makes me feel just a teensy less like the slug that i have been!!!!!
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lumpynme, having cancer and going through chemo and living life means we are not slugs. we are getting by in a very hard time. we're kick ass dudettes and dudes and we manage in spite of.
so there.
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Hello all......to respond to the color coded snot LOL.......I too was bothered by this offensive condition. It made me crazy, that congested head and constant need to blow my stopped up nose. However last night my girlfriend brought me over a humidifier and it was bliss!!!!! While it is still stuffed, it is immensely better then it has been and most importantly I can finally breathe. The never ending headache that I think was brought on from the congestion is lessening. All in all, i feel marginally better. hate to jinx myself but I think this may just be doable.
Only thing is, while i was patting myself on the back thinking, okay I handled this, I got this enormous burst of panic in my chest, thinking about the next TX. I was so worried about the first one and now I am already worrying about how I can bear to do this again. ;0(
Anway - enough complaining. I had a nice big wendy's cheeseburger and fries and a pepsi last night, which I followed with pineapple slices dipped in Nutella. While aboslutely not a healthy dinner it was fantastic and you know why??????I actually tasted it. Nothing could have made me happier. So I am off to take a little nappie poo and will check in with all later
(((HUGS)))
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Mthrdee sorry about the congestion. I put my humidifier on and it is better, but we have to be very careful with those, change them out every day, can't let bacteria get ahead! I bet the cheesburger tasted good. That's what I thought about the icecream, just little things to make us happy. Still feel shakey though, and my sugars are a bit high again. Damn! Got to get Hercrptin #2 Thursday, will probably need to buy more Kleenex! LOL
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Got to love the Herceptin! I've already gone through a ton of pink tinged kleenexs here at work! hehe love the color coded snot! Has anyone else gotten the mouth sores too? those were a pain!
I finally got some of my taste buds back but still cant drink pepsi or coke without it tasting terrible. i miss it
Moonflwr are you on every Thurs Herceptin too? sounds like me
This week though i go in for TC as well.. very nervous about it. Usually after Herceptin I have to come home and sleep for hours. Wonder how this week will go.Lumpy I think I am like you.. permission to be a slug! I am used to going at full speed and then some between my work and my 2 kids keeping me so busy that I am having a really hard time slowing down and making myself be ok that the laundry isnt done or the house isnt clean. Right now as I sit at work all I can think about is when can I take a nap! I know I will be out on Thurs though and maybe Friday so trying to hang in there today and tomorrow. Good luck to everyone getting treatment today!
Talk to you all later.. may the rain go away here in the Midwest too!! Bring on the sun!
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my phone interview went well; the gal e'd my daughter and said that i was "sweet and cute" . she feels that i am more than qualified for several of the positions within the company and plans to speak to a few of the hiring managers to see how (if) they/we can work thru my tx. so- we'll see- as i said earlier i need the money so if ya swing chickens or pray maybe do so for me...if it is meant to be..
doc's office called- i have to pick up a scrip tomorrow for pain- i did buy a heating pad today. nurse agreed that if i am having that much pain the neulasta is working! yea me ! i got something right!!!!
picked up a pint of wonton today-oh it was soooooooooooooo good....
tho that cheeseburger sounds yummo right now! we're having some small steaks and a potato tonite--giving in to my cravings!yesterday bought some deli turkey, ham off the bone and baby swiss with rye bread-oh my!
my "daughters" (daughter and DIL) wanted to take me for a pedi and dinner tonite- i begged raincheck...right now i would have to shave my legs! and really don't wanna push the germs envelope ...i think that i may call in the rain check after another tx..pampering is good.
hair still here...back feeling so much better than yesterday...lump actually feels a teensy smaller tho that could be all in my mind!
who posted the Crickett's Answer for Cancer website? gritgirl??i applied and got a wonderful email last nite that my wig is ordered and on it's way!
gritgirl i am an ass kickin dudette!!!! --in my nitie! put it on immediately after coming home! love it!!!!
ok-the recliner and the dog are calling me.....
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Lumpyne
Fingers crossed and prayers that you land the job!! I would wait in the pedi too. I could really use one my self but even speaking with the nurse last Friday she said not a great idea right now. I had the weirdest craving for steamed broccoli tonight LOL! Had made a chicken pot pie and froze it last week so had it with that! I'm a green veggie freak so normal for me. Oh yes and a grilled cheese for breakfast then a banana! Looks like I'm getting back to normal, somewhat anyway. Hopeully we'll feel a bit stronger to give us the strength for the next TX.
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Lumpynme - That was me about the free wig. I got mine last week and it was really nice. My hairdresser was very impressed with my choice. Unfortunatley I am not finding the wig wearing that comfortable but I have it if I need it. Glad to hear your interview went well. I will keep fingers and toes crossed for you.
Gayle
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Hi everyone! I finally start Monday. So much to take in in chemo school. Starting with one other young mom who has twin 3year olds! I'm so glad mine are in college! I got the scoop on rinsing with biotine, taking Claritin after neulasta, etc. how about sucking on Popsicles during infusion? They also gave me my anti nausea prescription, soooooo, I think I'm as ready as I can be!
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