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New Jersey/NYC/CT/Eastern Pennsylvania ladies

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Comments

  • jrnj
    jrnj Member Posts: 408

    Hi, I’m still here occasionally. Central Jersey. Still miserable and tired all the time from the meds. I wake up every 2 hours at night, I feel achy and swollen all the time. But my fear of cancer is greater than my misery so I fear this is how I will feel forever. I keep reading stories of people going off meds after 10 years and having a reoccurrence. Also living in like a separated state in same house. Kids are annoying but great, 16 and 18. One in college and one’s a junior. Don’t know what I will do in the future. Thinking about retiring in about a year. I need more sleep.

  • cookie54
    cookie54 Member Posts: 873

    @fighter00 Ok here just trudging along scanxiety will start soon since I am having my 3 month CT in a couple weeks…always a nerve wrecking time!

    How are you? What's happening..start treatment yet?

  • fighter00
    fighter00 Member Posts: 41

    @cookie54 I’m still alive but I’m not living. The fear of what’s going next gonna kill me before the stage 4. I don’t have strong to move one. I’m gonna give up and refuse the treatment plan my ONC gonna suggest me. I suppose to do the bone biopsy tomorrow, I’m not sure I gonna make it. I can’t keep crying all the time😭😭

  • cookie54
    cookie54 Member Posts: 873

    @fighter00 Oh no this is all so new and devastating right now I know ! Please give yourself some time to digest this really tough pill to swallow. I cried a ton in the beginning also you need to release your emotions and that's ok. Have you considered meds to help deal with all this? Maybe something to take the edge off for now? You can get help from a therapist or even on this site to talk to others in the same situation. I participated in the online support group here when I was first diagnosed stage IV and it did help me. A kind woman said these simple but true words to me " Your not dying tomorrow" and that really got me thinking to try to live each day as a new day.

    I hope you are doing the biopsy today so you can at least see what you are dealing with for sure. Also there are so many new treatments that have evolved since I was first diagnosed in 2016. I know we are not curable but we do know it is treatable! These treatments may give you several years to enjoy your family and friends.

    Overall I wanted to let you know that I hear you and understand! But I wanted you to know that your life is worth some fight if you choose to. You are still in control and can start or stop treatment anytime you want. We are all here for you, please let me know how you are. Sending big hugs , strength and positive vibes your way❤️

  • moderators
    moderators Posts: 8,741
    edited January 29

    @fighter00 - We're so sorry that you're feeling so down; it's a very difficult place to be in, but you will get through it! Perhaps it would be helpful if you talked with your doctor or another health professional about how you are feeling. Also, as you can already see, this wonderful community is here to lend an understanding ear and offer encouragement. Please, consider going through with the biopsy tomorrow, it can provide crucial information for your treatment plan.

    Hang in there, we are here for you!

    Many hugs!

    The Mods

  • fighter00
    fighter00 Member Posts: 41

    Thank you so much for you support ladies. I gonna do the biopsy. Thanks 🙏🙏