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Comments

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644
    edited February 2013

    Cindy my brave friend, yes you are thinking the right way. Having seen my FIL struggle with his breathing on oxygen 24hrs i would do the same. FIL had a box which hooked into a line in him. The only thing we didn't know was it can take effect within minutes for some. This happened and we didn't say goodbye. It was less than 24hrs and i think it's a blessing for the family not having to wait and see your loved one go. I know you won't mind me talking like this as we have always been honest with each other. I have told my family if it comes to it for me i want to go the same way but with some wine as well. My heart breaks for your family but they know deep down "you come first" i want you to know when the time comes i will be sitting with you talking shite and holding your hand. We will meet up one day in heaven and get pissed together while eating m&m's. xxxxx

  • blondiex46
    blondiex46 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited February 2013

    Cindy you are so brave and such an inspiration to all of us, and letting me know how it is at the end is something that will help me....rest, sleep, talk do whatever you want, and thank you for sharing your life with me.....

  • Linda-n3
    Linda-n3 Member Posts: 1,713
    edited February 2013

    Cin, you have handled your life so well.  You have loved your family, you have loved us here, and we all return that love.  You have taught us so much, and when it is your turn to leave us, we will be grateful for the time you spent with us, and grateful that you will have no more suffering.  I'm sending special prayers for St. Peter to meet you with not just M&Ms, but a box of the most wonderful chocolate truffles that melt in your mouth and give you near chocolate orgasm. Peace to you, my friend.

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    {{{Cin}}} You are an amazing lady, and you'll never know how you've touched all of our lives! We're here on this journey with you, so never feel alone.  We all support your decisions, of course.  Our hope was that you would not be in pain and could make all of the decisions that you want, when you want.

    Thank you so much for reaching out to us when you can. I hope every day you can find some small joy, and that our card shower is helping you look forward to what might come in the mail every day!

    Linda, girl you made me spit out my coffee with your chocolate orgasm comment! I know Cin will laugh at that one! 

    Hugs to all of you today and always!

  • Gingerbrew
    Gingerbrew Member Posts: 1,997
    edited February 2013

    Dear Cindy, 

    Iunderstand and am very glad you are working with hospice now. If you can ask for a plan to be put into place it could leave you more assured that your wishes are followed.  

    My mom moved into her final stages very quickly and there was no time for hospice to come into the nursing home. As a result she was put on oxygen without a plan for morphine. Her last days would have been easier had such a plan been put into place. I think you are making wise decisions Cindy.   

    I send you love and M&M showers. 

    Ginger

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 672
    edited February 2013

    Cindy, my dear, I would do the same thing. No justification whatsoever for putting up with more crap. You have touched so many of us and inspired us to follow our values and hearts. I am adding some M&Ms to Ginger's already generous portion...

  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 672
    edited February 2013

    On singing: I used to sing soprano at choirs and at an amateur theatre group I belonged to. Haven't sung in years, though. Probably a Mezzo by now. :-)

    Blondie - so sorry about how hard that damned chemo is. I hope it gets better for you.

    Elaine, thinking of you, too, at this time.

  • ElaineForCindyRose
    ElaineForCindyRose Member Posts: 76
    edited February 2013

    Hello Lovely Ladies ... and Cindy Tongue Out 

    So, I spoke with Cindy a little while back & she had an "episode" she said I could share here but not over on the blog. She's been having less and less time to actually get to the bathroom once she realizes she's gotta go. So, it was sometime in the middle of the night, she hurried to get into her chair and completely forgot about her PCP pain med bag. She was in the wheelchair and started to wheel away and jerked the bag off the bed, she tried to turn back quickly to catch it and in the process fell out of the wheelchair ~and~ pulled out the needle to the port. DH, DD, and DFriend were all upstairs asleep and none of them heard her call them. The Dilaudid made a puddle on the carpet in the livingroom.  She managed to get herself back in the wheelchair and to the bathroom & cleaned herself up -thankfully, she had a pad on. Then she realized she'd hurt herself all over -bruised but not broken.  

    She called the Hospice on-call folks and they got someone out to her -who did not know how to re-insert the needle into the port, but Cindy said she'd talk the nurse through it. When the nurse got there, Cindy had all the necessary items laid out in order on the table.  The nurse got there about an hour later & this wakes up their dear doggie & thus, the household.  So, Cindy taught the nurse how to insert the needle & flush it & get stuff working (quite a while, since the nurse was initially on the phone with someone to talk her through it, when she missed the port one time she almost pulled the needle out without securing the port itself first =-( ... at this point, Cindy took over & told her to put the phone down & she'd talk her through it). Cindy was honestly glad to help this nurse learn a new procedure -and the double bonus was that she had meds flowing in her again ~she said she actually felt them "hit." She usually doesn't. Anyways, after all that Cindy made her breakfast =0)

    Since then, I've talked briefly with her friend Diane, who said she's staying with Cindy after work and doing all she can for her. She knew of a bench-like seat to put over the side of the bath tub so Cindy could sit on it then just turn around and be in the tub! So, she'd been able to get a bath & have her hair washed in the comfort of her tub! Joyous moments!  Diane also said Cindy had fallen a couple times, but was ok. 

    I've tried to call several times but haven't been calling at good times, I guess. I'm sure there's a lot of sleeping going on & a lot of trying to rest and deal with this agonizing pain. On a happy note -yep, I still look for them! Cindy's DS and DIL made the trip back to AZ last weekend. They're expecting the first Granddaughter early April. She'll be taking "Rose" for her middle name ... the spelling for her first name is still changing, but it's pronounced something like Aleah. DS and DIL are planning on staying with DIL's father & there's a job lined up already for DS. 

    I pray for you all and send loving thoughts, Elaine

    milk & graham crackers

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644
    edited February 2013

    Elaine, thanks for the update and you do it so well.

    I can just see Cindy now helping the nurse but in a kind gentle way.

    Good news about the job for DS that will comfort Cindy a lot. Diane will be doing a fab job I know they are great long time friends.

    Hugs to you Elaine you are a very loving sister.



    Xxx

  • CelineFlower
    CelineFlower Member Posts: 145
    edited February 2013

    Good to hear from you Cindy...and thank you for that view into her life, elaine  :)

    I feel so blessed to be your friend Cindy... even tho we dont knoweachother well... i feel welcomed into your heart

    When my mom was dying, wealways talked openly about it...

    "your gonna haunt me right mom?" 

    lol... i am so glad she had no fear oftalking about dying... made it soooo much easier for me.

    Cindy you have given this community more then you know..

    So many members here, die... we hear about it thru facebook.. or others..

    But you haveallowed us to follow you on this path... and we are learning so much.

    cheers to cindy!

  • blondiex46
    blondiex46 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited February 2013

    Thanks Elaine and of course Cin did, isn't that what we do, we are pretty much professionals when it gets to a certain point and tell people what they need to do....pretty funny, we are more competent then they are and they get paid for it.....good for Cindy...

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    Hi Elaine, thanks for checking in!! I wonder if Cin should have a "baby monitor" so the folks upstairs can hear her at night if something happens? I worry about her, not just from the standpoint of needing help, but feeling all alone, I think it would provide some comfort, as well? Let me know.

    Cin, you crack me up, showing the nurse how to do things - he!! yeah! That's our girl. Soldiering on! You would have been a great military lady. I am so glad your son made it home and how cool they will give their daughter Rose in your honor!  :-)  Aleah (no matter the spelling) Rose is beautiful, isn't it?!

    Love to all of you, Blondie, sending thoughts to take your pain away...Linda, hope you have a few moments to get lost in your art and music today...Athena, hope you have a great day and enjoy our sun and warmth today in DC...Celine, you remind me of Luna from Harry Potter, an ethereal spirit...Ali, hope you have a day without teenage daughter drama :-)

  • CelineFlower
    CelineFlower Member Posts: 145
    edited February 2013

    baby monitor is a great idea...

  • Gingerbrew
    Gingerbrew Member Posts: 1,997
    edited February 2013

    Willl hospice send a night nurse. My dad had a night nurse and it helped my mom get some sleep.  

  • blondiex46
    blondiex46 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited February 2013

    baby monitor is a good idea

  • Bluebird-DE
    Bluebird-DE Member Posts: 1,233
    edited February 2013

    Yes please.  They would help so much.

    Cindy, stopped to see how you are.  I know what you are needing.  I have decided the same for myself.  I was so concerned about my mom when she was a hospice and intensive care patient for cancer. 

    Hugs, dear Cindy and all.

    LOVEEssa

  • ali68
    ali68 Member Posts: 644
    edited February 2013

    Funny story : my DH says since I've had cancer our sex life is not the same! Well I said "I wonder why"

    So it Valentines day tomorrow and I took it upon myself to book a nice restaurant and bought some sexy underwear.

    Yes you've guessed it, DH has a swollen face, covered in hives and has a bad back.

    Let it be noted I tried!

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    Too funny, Ali! You could come up with a good comeback about him not being all that desirable himself right now! sigh. We have babies, hysterectomies and breast surgeries, all of which cause doubt about our figures, give us stretch marks, scars, weight gain, et al. Men have it so easy. Going bald isn't a good counter argument!

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    Just a shout out to Cin in case you check in- your fan club is still here! :-). Love and hugs to you, special lady!

  • Linda-n3
    Linda-n3 Member Posts: 1,713
    edited February 2013

    What carpediem said - your fan club is still here for you, Cin, and also Elaine.



    Thanks for the reminder that I need to get a Valentine's day card for DH.... have been meaning to but keep forgetting every time I go out....



    Love to all.

  • CelineFlower
    CelineFlower Member Posts: 145
    edited February 2013

    Heres a tip or two from your "local" florist...

    Order ahead of time.... pre orders always get the first, flowers. they are usualy the freshest.

    Red roses... are NOT what they used to be... they are overbred...if you really want roses, choose colored as in... anything but red... and long stem will usual give a better quality flower (5ocm or more) anything less will not bloom for morethen a few days.

    Mixed flowers are also great at this time of year... Tulips are starting their season, tho best at easter and mothers day

    Holland daisies ... are one of my favorites, especialy the white ones.

    ppl often ask me what my favorite flower is...my response if always the same..

    " i could never pick one, the others would be jealous!" 

    But.. i love bouquets with one kind of flowers no mor.. like.. all iris's... or all bird of paradise..

    the language of flowers is not one many speak anymore... but thanksto the victorian age secret love language, bouquets can tell a story..Red and white roses say togetherness.. thats one of my fav..

    And lastly... no needfor ANY addirives in your bouquets... make sure to change water often... daily if you wantto spoil them! cut stems every 3 days before putting into new water, keep them away from heat sources... andremember to say hello once in awhile , they truly do thrive with attention..

    From my heart to yours Cindy, Elaine and all of us ... happy valentines day, may your love lift you high!

  • crog234
    crog234 Member Posts: 324
    edited February 2013

    Cin. Just found this forum... Thanks Cindy and Elaine for the updates and stories.. Cin you are truly a wonderful person. You have helped me in so many ways.. I am proud to call you my friend even though we have never met...



    Take care my friend



    Love,

    Cindy

  • ElaineForCindyRose
    ElaineForCindyRose Member Posts: 76
    edited February 2013

    welcome Cindy Smile

  • crog234
    crog234 Member Posts: 324
    edited February 2013

    Thanks for the welcome Elaine!!!!!



    Cindy

  • Linda-n3
    Linda-n3 Member Posts: 1,713
    edited February 2013

    Will all of you be my Valentines?

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    Welcome Cindy! I'll be your valentine, Linda! :-)



    Thanks for the flower advice, Celine :-)



    Hope you all have some love in your life today from your special person (or animal, I was just loving up on my doggie)

  • CelineFlower
    CelineFlower Member Posts: 145
    edited February 2013

    yes linda!! hehethx :)

  • blondiex46
    blondiex46 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited February 2013

    HAPPY VALENTINES DAY TO ALL!!!

  • sarahsmom
    sarahsmom Member Posts: 276
    edited February 2013

    Hi ladies!  Passing through to check on everyone.  Cin, hope you had a nice Valentines Day with your man - I just love your love story! Not everyone finds their soulmate (or you pass them by, they are found too late, when you can't have them, etc), but you are truly blessed! I know things are tough, but I am so glad you have love by your side.

    Be back later for more, just wanted to get our thread for Cin moving again in case she checks in. xoxo

  • Bluebird-DE
    Bluebird-DE Member Posts: 1,233
    edited February 2013

    Essa here with more gentle hugs.  No one has been here in four days.  I am whispering.  Perhaps we can gather and dance in Cin's thoughts very quietly.

    Diane (LOVEEssa)

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