2013 Survivors!!!
Comments
-
Guys, I am deleting a couple of prior posts because I am a little concerned that I am not expressing things well. And now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
0 -
Mccook, sorry about your friend. I hope the spots turn out to be something benign.
0 -
Thanks stride - he has stage IV small cell lung cancer so we know that his prognosis is not perfect but I am hoping for a Miracle for him as he has been so strong!
0 -
stride: I didn't notice if you were or weren't expressing things well.... guess its good sometimes to be a bit thick
Scorchy - thanks for taking the time to come back. As all the others, I too will continue to read your blog. I absolutely love its honesty. Take care Hun and heaps of hugs xxx
mcook: thoughts to your friend
Hello and hugs to all.
0 -
Scorchy, I've been reading your blog too, and find so much wisdom in there that could only have come from experiencing excruciating pain, both mentally and physically. Thank you for sharing your intimate journey of suffering with us. As for feeling like an outsider, that's how I felt all the time since diagnosis. It is only during the last few months that I am beginning to feel part of a (changed) normal world again. I am only too painfully aware that any of us may find ourselves where you are, and I want you to know that I admire you for being so honest and open. Not many people are able to step back, evaluate and analyze their own situation like you are doing with such calmth, serenity and intelligence. Big hugs and best wishes to you!
0 -
Got my bracelet Believe and I LOVE IT!!! I have not taken it off since Saturday and feel like I have you all with me when I wear it. Trying to get a picture on here from photobucket but when I put in the IMG code, all I get is the lovely red x...will try again.
Just went to PCP for the dizziness. He thinks it is vertigo bppv and will resolve on own. I confessed how I have been a nervous wreck and these past few days have had me so anxious. He said I have been through a lot (which compared to alot of you, feel I have no reason to complain)...and sent me home with script for a small dose of valium for just a few days to take as needed. I have never taken anything ever for anxiety....oh the gifts of BC.
Scorchy, hugs..I have always read your blog too!!!
Mcook, so sorry ....I hate this disease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
0 -
0 -
Aruba- looking good! And, you figured out Photobucket. So glad you like your Angels. You'll never be alone, we are all always with you.
Glad you got some satisfaction on the dizziness. Hope the pills help.0 -
ramols - In the very beginning, after my BC dx, I always referred to my "foobs" meaning both my TEs and my implants. But ever since my Exchange surgery last August, The New Girls have become MY girls. They ARE my breasts, such as they are. I will have them for the rest of my life, so I'd better take ownership of them! They're not perfect, but they're pretty good!
Aruba - in addition to being a good anti-anxiety medication and muscle relaxer, Valium has been shown to be a very good vestibular suppressant. So it could actually improve the vertigo you feel after a BPPV attack.
0 -
Practicing with Photobucket. This is a bracelet I made today. We are probably the only ones who know what this stands for:
0 -
Aruba,
A few weeks ago I mentioned to the NP from my oncologist's office that I had a day when I was dizzy. She said maybe I wasn't getting enough fluids. I think she was right. Just something to consider. Hope it clears up soon.
0 -
Scorchy....I also read your blog and cried.....thank you for coming back. I want to reiterate what others have said that some of us live with "if" and some "when" and that no one is promised tomorrow. I have become close with someone on the boards here.
She has just gone from stage 1 to stage 1V in 2 1/2 yrs. You are so loved here so please
continue to visit us when you feel like it. ❤❤❤
Mcook....so sorry about your friend.
Aruba.....glad you got some help...BTW I chose the same bracelet and have not taken it
off since I got it.
Believe....you are so talented!!!! .....love the new one.
Stride....anything goes here .....lol0 -
Scorch- I'm so happy you posted on here today. I have wondered where you ran off too, so glad you came back.
I miss our group hugs! If you don't want to post just leave us a group hug so we know you are thinking about us as much as we are thinking about you.Aruba- If it gets worse make sure you get in to see a physical therapist that specializes in BPPV therapy.
Believe- Love the bracelet! Yes, only we would know what it means.
Juneau- Make sure you take some time for you. It's great to help others, but you ultimately have to take care of you first.
Ramols- Hope you are doing well, how many Rad treatments are you having to do?
Tazzy- 9lbs that is AMAZING! You are the biggest loser for last week.
Blessings- I too call my new girls "my girls" and even have others calling them that too. haha
Stride- There is no need to delete posts I didn't take anything you said wrong or pushy. It was how you felt.
Today has been one hell of a day. I worked 10 hrs today because I'm leaving early on Wednesday to go back to the PS for my 2 mos follow up. Kinda nervous about it, don't know why. I will be questioning nipples or no nipples, I'm still up in the air about it. I really hate having to make more decisions when i'm tired of making them already. Hope everyone is doing well today.
0 -
Believe... love the NED bracelet - great idea.
Dunno what I am doing for the weight thing... really I dont. Can only put it down to tamoxifen... less alcohol - SCOTTIE see
and going back to work. Oh! and I have my half cup of oatmeal in the mornings... that fills me up until lunchtime. We will see how long it continues.Hugs to all... having a bbq chicken with a small portion of caprese pasta.
0 -
Stride; we should have a rule here... No deleting allowed; anything goes...ANYTHING. NO ONE SHOULD EVER EDIT. That's what we're all about. We live you and your opinions, thoughts and feelings.
So... My diet sucks. I'm just miserable with it and now that I had my port scar excised today I can't exercise fully for the next week or two. Maybe I can ride the bike at work tomorrow. My chest hurts tonight. Only got a local. It sounded like she was cutting through a gristly steak. Yuk! But my hummus worm sized scar tissue is gone so now the shooting pains should end. Yay! My BS said shed lose weight with me a d see me next year! She's my age and much bigger... And also struggling. Fuck this shit!! I expect a thin long hair girl when I look in the mirror, but I get an I overweight woman with a pixie cut. What am I a MAN!? I'm old, fat and BALD (well I was)!! WTF?!,?0 -
juneau - you sound like me. I look in the mirror and complain to my husband saying: who am I, this is my life?! And then mr. happy who can't let me wallow pointed out the other night - as we were happily playing with our giggly boys before bed the other night: this is your life; not that person you see in the mirror; here, right now, enjoying life.
0 -
Ramols; I like your husband... :-|
0 -
Ramols and Juneau, I still look in the mirror sometimes, and can't believe what I see. Went from a sleek, dark bob to a snow white pixie. Part of the new normal to get used to, I guess. Sometimes it all still seem so unreal. Juneau, hope your wound heals quickly.
Aruba, hope your dizziness will clear soon. I've had it since yesterday after a short hour long flight. Could not exercise today at all, because I'm so unsteady on my feet. It's probably vertigo. Hopefully it will be gone when I wake up tomorrow.
So next Wednesday I'm getting minor surgery for a blocked tear duct. It will be done with local anaesthetic - don't want more of that stuff than is absolutely necessary. So not looking forward, but my left eye is constantly crying, and I'm dabbing at it all the time. Will be nice when the tears are gone. Got a list of do's and don'ts from the eye surgeon. I'm supposed to be on three days' bedrest after this - what? Isn't that a bit extreme?
Tazzy, I'm truly happy for your weight loss. You are such a positive influence here on this forum, and you certainly deserve the break. Enjoy!
0 -
Juneau: "Fuck this shit!! I expect a thin long hair girl when I look in the mirror, but I get an I overweight woman with a pixie cut. What am I a MAN!? I'm old, fat and BALD (well I was)!! WTF?!,?"
That. Was. Hilarious!
Believe: LOVE the NED bracelet!
Oh, and
Scorch0 -
Holy crap,
I haven't even felt well enough to get on these boards and they are my lifeline. Tx #2 last Thursday kicked my but. Had the headache/neck ache from hell and couldn't even sit up for more than a few minutes. Weird h/a usually hurt more laying down but not mine. Neck and shoulders felt to weak to even hold me upright. Spent many minutes/hours in the bathtub with my head in the warm water. Thank goodness we got a big tub when we bought our home. Tastebuds are all messed up only thing that tastes good is Hawaiian Punch and Fudgsicles. Weird meals. Forcing a few bites in but was in pretty decent nutritional state before this started but gotta get the protein in. Gonna try Lee's Fage Yogurt with juice. I love Fage yogurt so that should go down. I have actually been sitting up for 3.5 hours this am so making progress.
Missed you all while so out of it.
Hugs, Sheryl
0 -
SherylB-I hope each day gets better for you. I just had a yogurt in your honor.
I also cut my hair in a Pixie cut. My choice, who wants to fiddle with long hair when I have things to do, places to go and people to meet. Translation- the beast in the morning and I've added an afternoon shift. Loving the short hair, especially how quickly it dries. I'm thinking we all look adorable. Can we all buy into that?
Chris - good luck on your choices. Ask yourself, which one will you be happiest with in 5 years.
Tazzy and Chris too. Great weight loss. Maybe with my haircut I will show some weight loss next time.
Scorchy - glad you are writing here. So colorful. No, life isn't fair but its still good.
Have a great day ladies. My Beast is calling me.0 -
I am thinking that my foobie must weigh at least 2llb so have been taking that out too... that, nekkid and before food must help.... Wings & beer here I come.
Ramols: Your DH is so right... how he put that in perspective.
Juneau: hang in there. It will start working for you. And we love you however you are, or think you are.
Chrisrenee: good luck with your decision making.
Sheryl: hugs and sorry you feel so crappy, that too will pass
OK I am so busy at work... but had to check in, cos I get home, we cook dinner, eat it and I am ready for bed - work is tiring.
Hugs to you all - love ya xxxx
0 -
Tazzy, do you take your Tamoxifen before bed or in the morning? I've just been reading on another thread that taking the pill at night may cause weight gain, and just wanted to check with you.
SherylB, hope you are beginning to feel better. I guess chemo is halfway done for you? So one hour and one day at a time it will pass. BIG HUGS!
Believe777, I'm with you on the pixie cut. It is really super easy to handle. I don't even blow-dry mine, it dries by itself, and I use some moulding clay if I feel like it.
Re the struggle to lose weight: I have not lost anything since weigh-in, but I'm really beginning to see results from all the exercise, and also beginning to feel much stronger.
0 -
liefie: I take mine in the morning and in no way would I consider weight loss a SE
0 -
I feel that I am behind on this thread, I have been reading, it does move fast. My heart felt so heavy for you, Scorchy, when I read your blog and Stride's post. This is such a wonderful group of ladies brought together in 2012 through BC. I have been thinking that in a way one of the reasons we relate so well to each other is that we are all 'alone together'.
I hope to be able to explain and make a little sense of that.
I don't think there is one of us who doesn't at times think that we are going to be the 'one' who has a recurrence or goes on to stage 4. We have already had the experience of being the one in eight or nine, it is hard at times to believe that we won't be the 'one' again.
There are those that apologize and seem to feel they didn't go through as much in the way of treatment. They seem to feel guilty or in some way not as deserving of the term 'survivor' and therefore more alone. So not true. Like I have posted before, we all heard the words 'You have breast cancer' and those words changed all of our lives forever, no matter what has followed since the diagnosis.
I myself have felt alone and possibly not a survivor yet as I am still visiting the chemo chair every three weeks for my Herceptin, I am struggling with the Tamoxifen and I still have my rads to get through. Reconstruction is just something to think about in the distant future.
I love the fact that I can come here though and say what I think and just be me. There are very few places in this world that any of us can do that.
Scorchy, please continue to write and to share your experience, you do it so honestly and eloquently.
All the rest of you 2013 Survivors, please also continue to do the same. It is only through sharing with each other that we can truly know where each of us is at and how we are really doing. It is also the only way that we can continue to support each other.
Take care everyone.0 -
Liefie--beginning to see results and feeling stronger, that's what it's all about!
Tazzy--one day when I was worrying about my weight loss, I actually looked up the weight of my breast on the pathology report. I shit you not. It was 0.6 lbs. I like to think it lost a little water weight in transit.
Sheryl--you will get through this. Keep going, sister!
Today as I was lying on the tanning bed in the radiation room, the radio was playing a cover of the Beatles' song "Nothing's Going to Change My World." I thought, well, that's ironic. Later I looked up the lyrics. What a beautiful song:
Sounds of laughter, shades of life
Are ringing through my opened ears
Inciting and inviting me.
Limitless undying love, which
Shines around me like a million suns,
It calls me on and on across the universe0 -
Actually, the song title is "Across the Universe". Forgive my error, John, Paul, Ringo and that other guy.
0 -
Websister I think you have just described everyones fears prefectly.
0 -
stride: and that other guy...?? ha ha ha ! that was funny. Thanks for sharing those lyrics - how appropriate eh? And yes, I think we forget how much our boobs and now for some of us foobies weigh.
websister : absolutely you captured all our feelings on your post.
Hugs everyone xxx
0 -
Hello Ladies
Man lots to catch up on!
Juneau - I am sorry but I laughed at your comment as well but feel your pain! Last weekend my DH and I were heading out and we both had grey sweaters on and jeans but not only that I freaking hair matched:( so I look like his twin brother in some ways! If one more person tells me that my hair is cute I am going to kick them in the shins:)
Websister- well said!
Sheryl- hope these SE get better fast for you!
I had my post op appointment today. They released me to work but for only four hours a day
ugh I feel fine dam it but she wouldn't budge I need my dam vacation for a vacation 
One thing I always have to do when at my PS is getting pictures taken and the first time I had to stand there bf BMX I just cried during these. Today I was just annoyed and wanted the fuck out of that room. I don't know why but I feel like it is just humiliating getting these. I hardly look at myself and then I have to pose for photos. I don't know but today bother me.
My friend started rads to his brain today they said it was good that he listened to the signs and they found two small sites that they are treating so the doctors sounded optimistic for him. But I just cried today when I heard this news - I read his wife text and I just broke down while working through the hospital. It just makes it all so real I guess. We have paint the town pink in my home town so every day there is a story about someone who has lost their battle with this disease and it just is so over welhming this week to have BC all around every where I go in town. I went to a hockey game on saturday that was fund raiser for paint the town. They had a half time event and there was a lady there who put on the whole thing last year that now has cancer all over. I had to leave it was just too much for me. I just want to feel normal and not like a defected person. I did not choose this life but I am here and trying every day to make something positive out of this hell. I hope my participation in my marathon adventure will keep me focused on the positives! I am glad I have this
Thank you so for all your donations! It means so much to me! You all were the first ones to donate! I hope some day to meet all of you so I can give you all a big hug!0
