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Life does not end with a stage IV diagnosis (really!)

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Comments

  • 50sgirl
    50sgirl Member Posts: 2,071
    edited June 2017

    Txmom, Congratulations for landing your new job. It sounds so good to be able to work and then leave everything there at the end of the day. I hope the new chapter enriches your life and brings you extra happiness.

    Barbara, Have a wonderful day at the nature and science museum.

    Lynne

  • Bliss58
    Bliss58 Member Posts: 938
    edited June 2017

    Thanks, Lynne. I did have a nice time. Visited with a couple friends and their families at lunch, and of course, toured the museum. It was also nice to meet and talk with new people who are dealing with the Big C locally, and compare notes.

  • Nel
    Nel Member Posts: 597
    edited July 2017

    TXmom - Congrats on the new job. I have found working has helped maintain my mental health (or what is left of it LOL)   I left or retired from my full time job yesterday  I am 63 with stage 4 and am tired  Managed a small non-profit and the constant fundraising was wearing me down. I am going to continue on 10-15 hours a week until August and they hire someone new.  Then look for something part time   I need to work it save my sanity  and the money helps

    Be well Nel

  • divinemrsm
    divinemrsm Member Posts: 6,607
    edited July 2017

    Dh and I like to take day trips and our most recent one was to Mansfield, Ohio, a two and a half hour drive from our home. Located in Mansfield is the former Ohio State Reformatory, the site where the movie "The Shawshank Redemption" was filmed. Like many people, we love the movie. The building's architecture is absolutely incredible. Tours thru the building are given daily and people have been known to come from all over the world to check the place out. Quite a few people were there taking various tours offered. A few years ago, we visited another similar facility, the former Moundsville State Prison in WV, altho the OSR is a much larger place.

    I always look for additional things to do around a main attraction when we take trips, so we also visited the Kingwood Center Gardens....meandering brick pathways thru acres of all kinds of flowers on quite a large estate! I am a huge fan of public flower gardens, having visited a number of them; I think this was my favorite of all of them I've walked. It was a beautiful day weather wise for this trip, too, in the low 70s and sunny.


    The site of Shawshank
    image


    Kingwood Gardens, amongst the hydrangeas and roses

    image

  • micmel
    micmel Member Posts: 10,052
    edited July 2017

    Divine~ that makes me think of the love stories that i want to hear. Please if you can take time to tell me how you met and your love story, I know you posted earlier this week. But I want to hear all the love stories I can. It's my only defense to know their are happy couples all around. It makes me happy to hear about your story. Lovely picture you lovely lady!! Looks like a beautiful place to be with your person. Bless you! ~M~ (I know you didn't sneeze! )Lol

  • Kandy
    Kandy Member Posts: 424
    edited July 2017

    Ms Divine, that is awesome. Shawshank Redemption is one of my most favorite movies of all times. I didn't know that there was a place where you can tour. I'm going to have to look into that and see how much other things are close to visit. I think I want to make a trip there. How far is it from NC

  • Lita57
    Lita57 Member Posts: 2,338
    edited July 2017

    Divine, if you can, go to Butchart Gardens, Victoria, British Columbia. DH and I went there as part of our honeymoon trip. It's a HUGE public garden, and it was just glorious in the summer. That was 27 years ago, b4 we all had smart phones to take pics, so I don't have any that I can easily upload. But I had a ball. I still consider myself an avid gardener, even tho I can't move as much or as fast as I used to.

    We're re-doing our backyard and extending the patio out further. It will make it easier on my DH when I eventually pass. He HATES gardening. I'm putting aside funds so he can at least have a gardener come in on a quarterly or every other month basis and keep the rose bushes, camelias, hybiscus bushes and dahlias going when I'm gone. I've had to let go of so many other plants because I can no longer bend over and keep them going :o(. Now I have indoor plants - which is hit or miss with me. It's funny, I can grow just about anything outdoors, but put it in a pot and bring it indoors and it has a 50/50 chance of not surviving a year.


  • ABeautifulSunset
    ABeautifulSunset Member Posts: 600
    edited July 2017

    Me too on the fave movie Shawshank! Now I want to go too!

    I'm having a fantastic summer so far. Took a great trip to Mexico with my family, new backyard is completed and we've been having a heatwave, so really really enjoying it! Family pool time, family BBQ and dinners. Seeing good movies (loved Baby Driver).I am so acutely aware of how lucky I am to have this family, and this time to enjoy.

    Stefanie

  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875
    edited July 2017

    Ms. Divine, thanks for posting the great photos. I had to laugh at your comment Lita - I was thinking how much I wished there were places I could go like that on day trips as I live on Vancouver Island and it takes 3 hours just to get off of the island! And then you mentioned Butchart's Gardens... it's practically in my back yard.

    I love gardening as well but must admit that I am finding it challenging to keep up these days. My garden is large with lots of perennials and, in our climate, grows like stink! Hard to keep things under control. And like you Lita, I can grow anything outside but indoor plants? Somehow it always goes terribly wrong...

  • faith-840
    faith-840 Member Posts: 926
    edited July 2017

    Divine Mrs.M, wonderful pictures. How lovely to take days trips like that. I would love to do that but neither of us much enjoy long car rides. Our age is catching up with us as we both get very stiff sitting a long time. We do have a love story though and will be married 57 years in October, have 4 great kids kids married to good people and 10 smart, talented, beautiful grandchildren. Are there any other kind? 😎We feel very, very, fortunate, stage 4 cancer and all.

  • divinemrsm
    divinemrsm Member Posts: 6,607
    edited July 2017

    Kandy, The Ohio State Reformatory in Mansfield Ohio is probably about 8 1/2 hours from the middle of NC, not sure where in the state you are located. We made the trip since it wasnt really far from our town, and two hours of the drive were on roads we've traveled on many times. We try to check out local stuff within a two or three hour drive from home. Not sure I'd drive eight hours to see a former prison, but apparently, people come from far and wide to do so for this.

    Faith, grandkids are beautiful, yes, and there are no other kind! Yes also to feeling very fortunate in spite of mbc.

    Stef, your backyard sounds heavenly! I've been going to the local pool just a few blocks from my street. They have adult swimming from ten to twelve thirty. Dh and I got a pool pass, only cost fifty buck for us two!

    Lita and Sadie, the Butchart Gardens sounds so very lovely! I also flower garden, it is challenging as I have some physical limitations. I sometimes wonder why the heck when I was younger I planted so much stuff that needs trimming! My favorite thing to do lately is dig up the stuff that gets overgrown and get rid of it. Haha.

    Micmel, my dh and I were fixed up on a blind date by a mutual friend who'd known both of us for about eight years. We were in our early 30s. Dh had been divorced for many years and had a young son. I had never married and didn't want to be married too young. Never worried that I wouldnt get married either, and felt like when I was older, I would know soon after meeting someone that he'd be the right person. It was just a knowledge I felt made sense to me. And sure enough, dh and I got married three months after we met. That was in the late 80s.

    We have had our ups and downs but have similar backgrounds and compatibility. One requirement he had to have was the ability to get along with my parents and six siblings, no easy task! And he still had to side with me no matter what they said. He has done and continues to do that. He is more sentimental about some things than I which I attribute to different life experiences. Together, we have a good life.




  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875
    edited July 2017

    Hope this works as I have not tried to post an image... Here is a rather famous photo of Butchart Garden (at least one section of it). There is a lovely story linked with the Gardens. It was originally a quarry which Ms. Butchart turned into a fabulous garden (originally a private garden but now a tourist destination). It's fabulous in the spring when this section (the sunken garden) comes alive with rhododendrons on display.

    image

  • Lita57
    Lita57 Member Posts: 2,338
    edited July 2017

    Thank you, Sadie. That's how I remember it.


  • divinemrsm
    divinemrsm Member Posts: 6,607
    edited July 2017

    Whoa, Sadie! That garden is gorgeous!!!


  • Freya
    Freya Member Posts: 329
    edited July 2017

    Wow, that garden is stunning. Walking though there would lift any ones spirits.

  • faith-840
    faith-840 Member Posts: 926
    edited July 2017

    Sadiesservant, that garden is so beautiful, it's hard to believe it's real and not a painting. Thank you for posting it

  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875
    edited July 2017

    Another amazing garden in Victoria (where I live) is Abkhazi Garden (picture below). this was originally a private residence which has been preserved by a conservancy organization. It's another garden with an amazing story, the garden was created by a Russian prince and his wife who married in their forties, reconnecting after each surviving various tragedies through the two wars. The garden is at it's best in the spring with numerous rhododendrons but is also pretty spectacular in the fall.


    image
  • babs6287
    babs6287 Member Posts: 1,619
    edited July 2017

    Wow. I'm moving best you Sadieservant. What beauty!!!!

    Bab

  • bigbhome
    bigbhome Member Posts: 721
    edited July 2017

    So beautiful, Sadie! What a treasure! Sure brought a 😃 to me! We all might have to come stay with you to see these beautiful places! No, don't panic, just kidding!

    Hugs and prayers

    Claudia

  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 1,437
    edited July 2017

    Divine, You two are so cute! That reformatory looks amazing! We have a local pool too and I can wait to go splash around.

    Beautiful gardens Sadie. I could definitely spend hours there.

    Faith you have been many times blessed!

    micmil, My husband and I met at the ski resort we worked at. I was a beginner and he was a pro. The first time I tried skiing down a big slope I crashed at the bottom, bumped my head and broke my sunglasses. He skied to my rescue and took me under his wing. After spending a very short time with him I realized he was the most kind, attentive yet manly man I had ever met. I was hooked. We got married two years later and now have 3 wonderful kids in their 20's. He remains my rock and the love of my life.

  • Nan812
    Nan812 Member Posts: 224
    edited July 2017

    hello.... i too just love to hear your love stories and micmel started a thread just for those stories...please post them over there if you get a chance, that way we dont have to search all over when we need our fill of love story and heart break i believe its called.....

    Topic: My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

    thanks for sharing

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 5,252
    edited July 2017

    Thanks, nan. I try not to police this thread, so thank you for directing others to the appropriate thread. Here is a live link:


    https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/8/topics/...

    It is a lovely thread and I admit to being envious. I was married to an abusive, lying, alcoholic for 23 years. 'Nuff said! I have a career I love, beautiful children and grandchildren so I feel very fortunate despite the crappy marriage. May you all continue to nurture these loving relationships. Look at what a big boy Miles has become (15 months). image

  • sadiesservant
    sadiesservant Member Posts: 1,875
    edited July 2017

    Ha Claudia,

    I'm not sure you would stay long. I own a heritage home that I'm trying to renovate. At the moment, the focus is plaster repair which means all the furniture from four bedrooms is crammed into two rooms. But we do gardens well here in Victoria. It's all the rain!

  • Kandy
    Kandy Member Posts: 424
    edited July 2017

    Hello to everyone, I haven't posted on this thread for awhile but I have continued to read everyone's post. Since my world seemed to be going downhill, I wanted to keep this thread upbeat so I didn't post. Anyway, even with things going up and down for me, life continues on. Harper is growing up way too fast and is such a sweet little man. He will be a year old next month which is unbelievable. I'm so thankful for the time we have had together and pray that I have a lot more. TarheelMichelle and I have became friends and she came to my house yesterday to spend the afternoon with me. We had a great afternoon. I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying every moment. I attach some pics of Harper and of yesterday's visit with TarheelMichelle. Take care ladies, praying for each and everyone of you.

    imageimage

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 5,252
    edited July 2017

    Wonderful pics. You ladies look lovely, but cute babies always steal the thunder.

    I know what you mean about growing up too fast. Miles is 15 months and is running all over the place and laughing all the time. Each stage has it's precious moments. Harper is adorable

  • Lita57
    Lita57 Member Posts: 2,338
    edited July 2017

    image

    Doing what I do best on the next-to-last-day of my off cycle week. Toasting you all with a glass of Chardonnay from Napa, CA.


  • Nan812
    Nan812 Member Posts: 224
    edited July 2017

    miles and harper....omg what a huge smile i have on my face....there is just something about babies (a lot of things actually) that i just love...like how they sound and belly laugh, how messy they get , those silly lil faces, those chubby fingers and toes , that chubby little roll right behind their knee , and why do they smell so good for all the mess and goo they get into...so you can tell, i just love those babies!!

    exbrnxgrl....im so sorry to hear of the horrible person you were with all those years, im glad to hear that some joy was born from it....we are indeed lucky if our life partner is also our soul mate but that doesnt always happen....i believe we can make all kinds of deep connections with souls that help us thru the most difficult parts of our lives and are there to share our most incredible joys too , almost like an angel out of the blue....i know we have all felt that connection whether for a day, a month, a year, or a lifetime....we can honor all our "loves" not just the married "for some mistakenly" kind...those can sometimes be the most uplifting kind of story and i would love to hear those too...

    lita i'm following your lead and started enjoying a glass of wine in the evening and i must say it does help with some sleep issues...lol...keep being my inspiration... ;) or wait.....is it monkey see monkey do? lmao!!

    p.s. i didnt mean to sound as if i was policing this thread, i just really enjoy a good "love" story and i cant keep my threads straight anymore

  • artistatheart
    artistatheart Member Posts: 1,437
    edited July 2017

    I can't believe it's been a year either Kandy! He is so darn adorable as Is Miles Caryn. And for all the things Nan pointed out, chubby finders and toes, belly laughs, just the best. Great picture Kandy! Your pool looks like a lovely oasis.How nice to hook up with a fellow friend, the best medicine!

  • Freya
    Freya Member Posts: 329
    edited July 2017

    What gorgeous little men :) Kandy how lovely that you and Michelle have formed such a close friendship, lovely pic of you both.

    Lita, looking good, cheers!

  • Lita57
    Lita57 Member Posts: 2,338
    edited July 2017

    Watching the 1996 film THE BIG NIGHT with Stanley Tucci and Tony Shaloub.

    Two Italian brothers from Abruzzo try to save their failing restaurant by getting their "friend" to invite jazz great Louis Prima to their Jersey Shore restaurant for one big night of dining in the late 50's.

    It's one of my dd's, dh's and my favorite films. Watching it tonight with my family...another priceless memory.

    "The food is so good, you have to keeell yourself!"