Starting chemo August 2014
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Happy Easter / Passover/ Resurrection Sunday to all.
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Happy Easter/Passover to everyone. In Savannah, Ga. for a wedding. Discovered a knot in my right Breast just under my nipple. Tried to see someone before leaving for wedding, but didn't work out. Have an appt Friday with breast surgeon. It's actually sensitive, so can't help but think it may be an infected area and swollen. Wanted an ultrasound, but of course have to meet with Dr to confirm there is actually a lump there. Blah! I know it's a lump, just check it out already.
Elleng - After reading your post about Mia Farrow, I can totally relate. The plus side, so easy.
Wind girl - Love that you are planning a trip to France. Very exciting.
Gatamol - The picture posted of the children is just adorable
LadyB - Glad you are taking some time off to recoup. I didn't think the rads would make me as tired as it did. Hopefully will be back to yourself soon.
Cassiecat - I remember the couch being my sanctuary many days. I would get up for something, but had to return and just chill. Listen to your body. I have been doing a lot of walking down in Savannah. It feels good.
Drove over to Charleston early this morning to attend Easter svc at the Unitarian fellowship. We've attended several when ever in the area. Beautiful old building with georgous stained glass windows. Extending our trip a few days. Should hear this week when DH heart surgery will take place. They are talking about Sometime this month. We met with three different surgeons so far. All suggest getting it done before any heart damage occurs.
To all the ladies I didn't name, keeping you all in my thoughts.
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catie, nice to hear you are in Savannah! Good for the soul, soaking up all the history and sights. Dammnit to the lump.
The couch! Been on it, in it loads. Finding I am more fatigued lately, need rest in middle of the day. Givin in feels wonderful. Emotionally it is difficult at times.
So, another job interview today. i am going with the Costanza method sorta. Frankly my dears, if you do not want me slinging legal services at your place, I don't give a damn. As to the big question why did you leave your last job, here is my answer..."I went out for surgery and decided not to return to that field of law. I hate all lawyers and the idea of working for your firm makes me ill. So, you sh***theads got a 401k or what? I will be taking 2 hour lunches exclusively."
It Is difficult to be honest without disclosing the C word. And they are all terrified of it. Their minds just shut off, you can see it happen. Interview over, next!!! LOL, sending me far away does not lessen their chances of joining the cancer club.
Anyways, been on Pinterest for interview outfits. Going with classic stylish tailored pinstripe black blazer, black skirt in perfect length, tasteful jewelry, hose and sensible heels. White shell under coat. Perfect sized Coach square bag, off black.
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Cathie 57= Good luck Friday. I feel a lump at my incision site. I know our mind plays crazy games on us. I have mammo 4 weeks ago and all clear. Mine was scar tissue. Still going to ask my MO today. Keep us posted. Your trip sounds like a lot of fun. Stay positive!!
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OMG I'm so glad I am not the only one feeling a lump. I talked to my MO and he said it's probably scar tissue, from the way I explained where it was. He said he'd get me into see the surgeon. I have an appointment in a few weeks with the plastic surgeon and then the breast surgeon. He said it was ok to wait for that but if the lump changed at all to call.
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Gatomal, your family is BEAUTIFUL! Thanks for sharing them with us.
Good to catch up with you all. Keep on posting!
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the BIP hooked up a job!
No more family law dramas. No more litigation nightmares. No more jilted spouses expressing their vitriolic hatred all ovah me!
Doing estate planning, always wanted to, here is my chance. The best part?! They KNOW about my BC and frankly, they do not give a dam. How about that, still hiring me! Hiring partner says it makes no difference to him, that is just life and he could get hit by a bus any minute. Great salary, matching 401k,insurance, etc AND ROOM TO MOVE UP. Also, they are not aholes.
The Bipster starts Monday so you all know what that means...........wardrobe shopping!!!!
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Congratulations Bippy!!0 -
Bippy, you go girl! We knew no one in their right mind could overlook an awesomely talented woman like you! Congrats, Congrats!
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Yay bippy
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Bippy fantastic! Great work!
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Congrats Bippy, you deserve the best!!! Wow an attorney that is not an ahole? Got another spot open for me??
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Go Bippy! Congratulations on your new adventure!
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thanks sistahs!
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Bipster, that is awesome. Congrats.. Bring on the shopping!
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Way to go Bippy!!!
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I find it quite poignant and sad that we don't post every day more. But that means we are all getting our lives and doing great, so it makes me feel wonderful also!
I thought about all of you today when I was in the upscale consignment shop shopping for my new work wardrobe. Would Eileen like this cardigan? Would Cassie approve of my skirt? Would Amy like my scarf? LOL. Will Baby Levi and the Gatomal twinset remember Aunt Bip?
I did have a moment in the shop and I posted under I think, IDC stage II, my body is a wonderland. Left out the part involving the big titty pushing valley girl. Why do the 24 year olds with no bc feel need of pushing fake larger boobs on regular middle aged women? And why do they all have that same high, annoying nasally voice?
love her, hate her, dam, I was so like her.
my body is now like a haunted amusement park on the Jersey shore. Semi abandoned for years, Rusty cobwebs and very stiff. It makes lots of noises when you move things. Natural lubrication that was ample in recent years has dwindled to nothing. It will never be the same.People pass by, not even seeing it. Nothing but a shadow of its former glory. If you look close at night you may see flashes of how it used to be. Not too close!
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I approve of your skirt, Bippy!
I log on every day and read, but I don't always post. I think about this group daily, however. I am currently dealing with insomnia, and it's frustrating. I used to only have it when stressed, but lately my mind just goes from topic to topic and I feel wide awake for hours on end in the middle of the night. It started before the Tamoxifen, so I know it isn't that. Anyway, it's annoying. Work is pretty good, overall, and keeping me busy but not too busy. That's good. I never want to get too busy for days and weeks on end ever again.
I've been trying to exercise 30 minutes, 5 days a week and started a couch to 5k program this week. Anyone want to join me, virtually?
I'm healing up pretty well from rads. The area is still tender, but all in all I got off pretty easy I think.
Not much else going on! My hair is growing, slowly. I had a lady stop me last night to tell me that she liked my haircut, and asked where I got it done. I smiled and told her I'd had cancer. She gave my arm a little squeeze and told me it takes guts to go out with my short hair. She was pretty sweet.
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Gatomal what an amazing picture
two more and you will have the brangelina clan wish I had a kid before BC, you ladies are so blessed.Bippy congrats on the new job, I hope it will be all you desired. For years I complained about my workload but this year it was a life saver in keeping me occupied from the heartache of all this.
Thanks for the comments on my upcoming trip. I have been to Paris before but many years ago while I was in college, and we will also spend a few days in Nice. this time I will go with my camera, which I got during BC to keep me occupied as I am not able to windsurf yet, and am really excited to take some hopefully cool shots. I will post a link to my Flickr once I get better at this. So much to learn.
I also did volunteer for a work trip to chile but did not even got called back
oh well maybe one day...0 -
so got the path report back. Updated my signature to include all the news. 2/8 nodes pos, with evidence that chemo worked, tumor field was 5.5 cm, with average malignant cells in specimen about 15%, meaning that chemo worked, but didn't eradicate everything. We need to Re-excise the superior margin, so I'll be going in again, maybe may12, then rads three-four weeks after that. Doc is trying to get me into a trial, was just hoping that everything was great news, and we weren't still in this surgery stage. Just feeling scared.
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aw, Gatomal. I wish your news had been better. You're tough though, and you've made it this far. We've all got your back and know you can do what needs to be done. {{hugs}}
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gatomal sorry to hear about going into surgery again. About residual tumor, from what I understand that is quite normal for hormone positive tumors, that's why if below a certain size and her2 negative they don't give chemo. I am triple positive and despite the her2 being positive and herceptin I still had residual tumor, which is why I have been reading about this. In fact I just read an article today that in hormone positive tumors whether her2 positive or not, reaching pcr is not really an indication one way or the other for the future.
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So sorry the news wasnt better Gatomal. Huge hugs from MO.
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Gtaomal= Big hugs from me. I wanted all GREAT news for you. I hate that you are scraed. You have lots of love and support here. We are with you.
Bippy= I love that you think of us. The cardigan sounds great.
cassiecat= I am professional at having insomnia now. I am up 2 to 3 hours night. Chemopause. Night sweats, Never had before this. Now I am saturated at night and cannot go back to sleep.Had my lorazepam script refilled. May start taking. Bought the same shoes in 7 colors from on line shopping at night. Luckily, when I moved to FL with my BF after dating 14 years we decided to sleep in separate rooms. He snores and watches the Hitler channel all night (war channel) I would wake up screaming "the natzi's are coming we have to hide." So,I got my own princess room as he calls it. I try to read or watch TV. No one could possibly share a room with me now. I'm always exhausted in the morning. I hope this stops at some point. It is a drag.
FYI= My WBC came back almost normal. I got released from my MO for 1 month. No more neupogen shots. Went from a 1.5 to 3.7 in 4 weeks. I can finally see an ending to all this cancer treatment.
I also got a compliment on my hair cut. Several people have told me it looks great. I tell them it is chemocut. I dyed it again yesterday. Came out reddish. Oh well. I forgot what the old me looks like.
Sweet dreams everyone. It is 1:11am here and I am really awake. Went to sleep at 10:30pm. Woke up at 12:04am. Hope Golden Girls is on
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Windgirl, have a good time on your vacation. Paris -- loved it. Are you traveling to the countryside at all? Or staying in the city? Enjoy and shop!
CassieCat, I have slated mid to end of April to start the C25K program. So I am with you virtually. I have a goal set to run a 5K in Sept that is held near where I live.
Bippy, I love to shop at upscale consignment stores! I hope you found a few things. Again congrats and good luck on your new job.
Gatomal, wish you didn't have to have surgery. I don't like that you are scared I just have a huge hug for you (((HGUS))! As Cassie said your girls, your peeps have your back. What trail is your doctor thinking of? I believe you indicated you were going to UCSF, correct? I maybe looking for a second opinon on the Taxomifen/OS discussion I am having with my MO and was thinking of seeing someone either at Stanford or UCSF.
JeniferE any suggestions on a MO? I believe you are in my area also.
Eileen, your insomniac nights sound like mine. I either don't get to sleep until late or sleep and then wake up for 2/3 hours due to night sweats. So glad your WBCs are up.
My skin is definitely on the mend. I am starting to have sharp pains in the radidated breast. Called RO's office today and they indicated that was normal. The breast and clavicle areas are still very tender. My shoulders are still giving me issues --have PT appts to assist with the shoulder issues and the lymphedema (not only in the arm now but also in the breast - but both are being managed). 1 week and 2 days on Tamo and not SEs yet, but from the Tamo boards it seems it could take up-to 3 mos for SEs to appear. I am off work until 5/1 to recover from the RADs burns, breast edema and just so fatigued. When everyone else is going back to work I am coming off work :-(.
Pangtidor/Shirley, if you are still reading. I have been thinking about you. Bippy thanks for letting us know you spoke with Shirley.
Beatmon, how are you doing?
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love all you virtual hugs and support Cassie, Eileen, Bippy, wind girl, lady b, Jennifer, Jean,...like getting on the scale, I'm trying not to get caught in the numbers or stage, as my treatment is no different. The only thing that is different is that I may now be eligible for this trial testing out a pill that could be like the next herceptin for ER posthumous, maybe that's the silver lining here.
LadyB...please make note of latest info from the San anotnio conference in July that talks about recurrence and five year survival rates for Tamox vs aromasin. With ER pos tumors, ovarian supression with AIs make a big difference in percentage points re recurrence. My UCSF MO has said that UCSFs standard of care has been OS with AIs and not Tamox for years. I'll try to find some links, but search here on BCO too
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ladyB, saw this thread when I searched. Maybe it's the soft study?
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/78/topic/829343?page=2#post_4349761
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Gatmol I am a little late but just wanted to add another virtual hug. I am sorry your news wasn't better. But you got this and we are all here for you.
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gatomal,
Thinking of you, and what can I say except we can enjoy a ginger beer together in San Fran! It can't be easy and I'm so sorry that you have to undergo more surgery. I know you are in good hands though. Also, please know that though I am thrilled on the surface with my status of PCR, I realize that it may mean really nothing. No one ever knows who will recur, who won't, and why. Just because you didn't get it doesn't necessarily mean anything. At least from what I've read and seen here. Blessings and hugs!
Wind girl, what a wonderful trip to France will be. I can't wait until you're back to windsurfing and you can show us all pictures. Damn girl, your hair is amazing!
Angie, I'm glad your radiation burns are on the mend. You've been such an inspiration to me throughout this whole ordeal.
Eileen and Cassie, and everyone else re insomnia. Hell yes, me too. Tomorrow I go to my general doctor and I'm asking for something to help me. Toss, turn, up all my mind is just like a carousel. I hate it. Like A zombie during the day. I take melatonin and it does zippo even 10 mg. i've heard many horror stories about Ambien, LOL. Someone told me they eat entire cake and would not even have remembered it had not been for the remnants of it in their bed! Well, I hate to admit that I've done that before and had full memory of it. Without Ambien.
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ladyb, thanks, I won't be able to fit in the countryside, just Paris and Nice. Although we are planning to do a day trip to Monaco, apparently it's very close.
I downloaded the couch to 5k program app today and tried the first workout on the treadmill. I thought jogging would hurt my breast but I guess the bra was tight enough. The workout was easy I would say, and this is coming from a person who cannot jog. I actually don't even like it but do have to lose the multiple levels of rolls in my belly that are not only very unattractive but also unhealthy. I actually like weight training but that alone does not melt the fat fast enough. I've been eating ok but because I ate lunch and dinner at work for w while the restaurant food got me chubbier.
Tamoxifen has waited in the pharmacy for a week and now waiting on my nightstand for me to finally start it. I guess I just have to. I'll report back side effects as I notice them
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