CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.

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  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited September 2015

    Gaia!

    That is great news, congrats!! Yeah Pennysgal, she really did bury the lead. A wedding in Crazy Town and yes Poppy definitely has the chops to be the wedding planner. I did bake a wedding cake for a friend once, it was 25 years ago right after I finished chemo and it took me three days..so I'd be glad to bake you a virtual wedding cake. The Crazy Town diner can do the catering, just don't ask me to dance cause I don't do well.

    image

    Octo,

    that's one hell of a long drive to chemo. Are you at UCSF? My MO is affiliated with them and my other docs are there but I was able to get my chemo at a local hospital which is only a 25 mile drive from our house in Sonoma saving the long drive to SF, plus the SF parking.

    Jack, you have such lovely flowers perhaps you'd be able to make a great bouquet for Gaias wedding.

    Mom,

    yes, all the stuff you see, I've baked or cooked..my husband takes the pictures. I don't necessarily eat all of it...or I'd be enormous..but those donuts are testing for the menu at the restaurant I'm consulting for...and yeah twice tangling with this is not what I'd planned on but always worried about because of the other breast.

    Anyway....I know I'm missing a bunch of you, Ducky, Slow, Proud, Tom, Mommy and Queen...and probably lot of others..just wanted to add that this show your bra strap bullshit for Pinktober has gotten on my last nerve..THIS is what they think breast cancer awareness is??? How about show your scar/s????? That should sure as shooting make people aware...grrrrrrr. Back after a bit!!


  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    Sula, don't get me started on Pinktober. I'd like to show them something. It's in between my index and ring fingers!! Dumb-asses.

  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    Slow...this?

    image

    I stole this from Sula onthe pinktober thread. Bahhhhh!!!!

  • m0mmyof3
    m0mmyof3 Member Posts: 9,758
    edited September 2015

    Gaia,

    Congrats on your news!

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    Katy, Love that!! I've never been particularly fond of the color pink. However, I could get behind the color if the money was actually going for the cure. I don't see anything changing until someone famous exposes the real story behind the pink machine.My niece works for an organization that supported SGK for years. This year she convinced the organization to donate to our local BC resource center with me in mind. I was so proud of her for making that happen.

  • octogirl
    octogirl Member Posts: 2,434
    edited September 2015

    Good evening crazies....I am back from Round Two...don't have energy to respond to everyone individually, but let me just say:

    1. yes to fingers over ribbons, Sula and Katy!

    2. No, Sula, not at UCSF. That would be three hours from here even with no traffic. and parking, as you point out. No, my drive is to the big city of Fresno. Quite happy with the MO and set up there. It works...

    3. I am relaxing on the couch and watching the Giants/Dodgers. Round Two went fine once Hubby, Gabe and I got there and I got over the fact that so much of my hair was gone...Gabe smiled through the whole thing, per his usual approach to life.

    So only two other things to say:

    BEAT LA!!!!!

    and...

    I AM HALF DONE WITH CHEMO!!!! WOOHOO!!!

    Thanks for all the support and love you all give me. Couldn't do it without each and all of you!

    xoxo

    Octogirl


  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    look up bca.org (Think Before You Pink)

    Rent or buy the documentary Pink Ribbons, Inc. it's a documentary that most effectively exposes the story.

    On their website they offer help to get a public screening of this documentary in your area.

    I finally got pissed off enough.

    I wrote a letter asking for help organizing a public screening in my area.

    Look Ma! I think I just became an activist!!

  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    Octo- well done and congrats on hitting the halfway mark. Rooting for the Giants tonight!

    Steady on, GF!

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    Katy, I will definitely check into the public screening. I have think before you pink in my bookmarks.

    Octo, YAY!!! Happy Half Way!! Give Gabe an extra squeeze from me and big hugs to you!! You make a great team!!



  • JAN69
    JAN69 Member Posts: 731
    edited September 2015

    Good evening Sisters, Doing a quick spot check-in. Wow, saying again, Wow have you all been a busy lot. Love the cafe and the food.

    Octo, You get treatment in Fresno?! That's where I got my treatment. 4+ years ago. Who is your oncologist? I've had 4 so far. Not my idea of consistent care, but that's how it all worked out. We live in North Fork, up highway 41 then hang a right. Jan

  • suladog
    suladog Member Posts: 837
    edited September 2015

    just found Pink Ribbons Inc on Amazon Prime you can rent it for 3.99, can't wait!

    Octo,

    Glad you're halfway down the road!!!!

  • m0mmyof3
    m0mmyof3 Member Posts: 9,758
    edited September 2015

    Okay gals, its that time of day...... line up for your Daily Hug!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    Mommy- you're up early! Even for the East Coast! Thanks for the hug. Feeling better every day now. Thanks!


  • gaia0132
    gaia0132 Member Posts: 308
    edited September 2015

    Good Morning Fine Ladies of CT

    Mucho activity here and very comprehensive posts. I am just dropping in for a quick cup of coffee with you.

    Octo I am so sorry about the pain and distress with losing your hair. Sounds like Tomboy showed up right when you needed her. Hope you are getting some rest today. Yay for being half way there!

    Katy the bath looks divine and can't wait to see the tiles. Also good to hear you are feeling better everyday.

    Pennsygal, I guess I did bury the lead. How are you feeling as you are heading toward the day of surgery? Looks like you opted for the lumpectomy?Thinking of you.

    Slow happy to see you got back in the saddle! One revolution at a time; I believe you will get back in a 'real bike' again.

    Thanks for continuing to give hugs Mommy

    The whole Pink thing is a major bummer, I have always been adverse to it and now I simply find it offensive. And the earlier posts re the prostapril etc were brilliant. I think Octo you said it- the obsession with breasts and bald women....

    Rain you asked for confirmation of my reply.... I did say yes. He proposed on my favorite beach in front of the gorgeous clay cliffs of Aquinnah. No grand gestures just a simple 'will you be my wife' ..... which is perfect because we have already been deeply committed to each other.

    I love that CT will hold a bridal shower and cater the wedding... all the plans you are devising sound perfect. Poppy planning the party, Katy's flowers, wedding cake by Sula- collective menu writing and execution of food by the diner. Tomboy can you design the centerpieces for the table? Maybe a light-winged things kind of theme- dragonflies and

    Slow you would keep all the guests straight and advise on seating..

    Anyway I am so glad to be able to share with all of you crazy and lovely women!

    Did I mention that the nerve pain I'd been having for almost 2 weeks has 'magically disappeared' since being here? I did spend some time in 'future thoughts' CT last night fretting that it will return as soon as we get back to NYC...... So for now my commitment is to stay present with what is and soak up more island mojo.


  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    Christine- I am just glad. Very glad. That today you are pain free. So you know it's possible. Just look down at your feet. That's where you are now. Feeling very grateful for this reprieve and all of your news.

  • octogirl
    octogirl Member Posts: 2,434
    edited September 2015

    Gaia, what Jackbirdie said!!!

    Poppy, I know you don't need me for this, but I am happy to be the CT wedding gopher and assistant planner, since event planning is my blood somehow (I would have done exactly what you did with the Band kids...)

    Dragonflies sound perfect! Going to think about foods that go with that theme to propose for the chefs....

    and Mommy, your hugs came at just the right time! Hug right back at you!

    So, last night I abandoned the buds and went with the heavy stuff at doc's rec to try and avoid the sleeplessness I got in Round One from steroids. Ok, sleeplessness is an understatement: they totally hop me up! So...took an Ativan. Waited until the ninth inning. By the 11th I was sound asleep. Slept right on through, with Gabe at my side, until six thirty am!! (half an hour past my normal wake up time). Going for a walk! Most of hair gone but IT DOESN"T HURT!

    AND the Giants won in the bottom of the 12th! Great game even if I missed the best part. My mantra for the rest of the week: BEAT LA!!!!!

    Love to all my sister crazies. Ironically enough, you all keep me sane.

    Octogirl

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited September 2015

    Beating LA is okay, as long as it's NOT the Lakers we're talking about!

    gaia, I don't know how I missed your pronouncement of coming nuptials, I am on it! I can't marry mine, he would be stuck with my crazy family, and my med bills. Won't do that to him.

    Okay, wait a minute.. is Gabe being passed around? I hope so!

  • Westphal107
    Westphal107 Member Posts: 2
    edited September 2015
    Happy National Coffee Day! I hope that everyone is starting their day with peace and optimism and a REALLY good cup of coffee!

    Thank you for allowing me to be a part of this fantastic group. I am 14 days post op from BMX w DIEP recon. I have struggled with pain control but finally feel like I made progress yesterday, so I am optimistic at this stage.

    I feel very lucky to have been diagnosed early stage and pay great respect to my fellow CT'ers who are dealing with all the big/bad/ugly of BC. You are all so strong and are an inspiration to me, as a newbie to BC.

    Aside from the physical pain and recovery, am I more challenged with the very strong WTF attitude that I have. Life goes on and I know that I have to reengage in a few weeks and get back to work, but I also feel like cancer demands a change and how can I just go back to "the way it was" before BC?

    How have you all dealt with this? Am I being over dramatic? What have you done to get "back in the game"? None of it seems important anymore.

    Thanks for your help and I wish you all a wonderful day.
  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited September 2015

    Westphal, it just happens over time, give yourself plenty of it! You are pretty brand spanking new to this, you will get there. Of course, it helps to relocate to crazy town, where the living is easy...

  • Tomboy
    Tomboy Member Posts: 2,700
    edited September 2015

    ...I am on my second cup of Nespresso, I will drink enough today to bounce off the circus tent walls of c-town today, thanks for the reminder!

  • dsgirl
    dsgirl Member Posts: 193
    edited September 2015

    Dear Crazies, Beppy, thanks for doing the roll call, feel so young, like I was back in school, at least for a couple of minutes. Mostly I am completely at a loss as to who is who, except for you and Katy. I suffer from imaginary chemo brain, or age acquired brain fog. But love to read here, I am a reader, don't like the word lurker. I think it was Octogirl that mentioned the Giants and her devotion to them, and wanted to comment as I lived in So.Cal, (Ventura) for 9 years, eons ago, and was such a fan of the Giants, this was during Wiilie Mays tenure with them, and it also impacted how I felt if they won or if they lost, but the most important thing was beat the Dodgers. Did venture to Chavez Ravine ever so often to see them when the Giants came to play. When they sent Willie to the Mets, I quit being a Giants fan, and went with the Cubs of all things. By the way, I quietly left the Crazy Town Mansion's patio when I got the good results of the Mammo in the mail, Yeah, good for a year now anyway, but will keep coming here to "read". Love you Ladies.

    Dsgirl

  • proudtospin
    proudtospin Member Posts: 4,671
    edited September 2015

    afternoon all, back from my gym time, seems some of the aqua ladies were on the war path, the sub instructor was not giving a good class or not as hard as they wanted. Lordie but I just wanted to say we are all here for fun! oh well, my workout was fine.

    now of course I am trying to remember what was said......brain fog for sure

    DSgirl, great that you are good for the next year and hey, keep on reading

    heard about the free coffee today, may have to head out to guzzle some up

  • Jackbirdie
    Jackbirdie Member Posts: 1,617
    edited September 2015

    DS- great news on the mammo. Enjoy your reading haha. Say hey once in awhile. We can get crazy over other things.

    I always start my day with good coffee. It was truly one of my biggest struggles through chemo, that my beloved coffee tasted like shit. Burnt! And it wasn't even Starbucks!

    West- I think we all struggle as you described. It's one of the reasons we are all here. Even in early stage cancer, lingering SEs from treatment and FEAR of recurrence, we circle and hover around Crazytown, dreaming up the worst of scenarios.

    Through our genuine respect and affection for one another we are learning all over again that life is what is happening right now. Like that old clichè- while we are making other plans. A little chuckle here, a little self- poking at our foibles there. We laugh, we cry, we worry, and we dream together. We are living. Now. That to me is what's truly important. I know it is a bit different for those of us who have specific things we want to be alive for later. A graduation. A child's wedding. And those are great goals and wishes and reasons to fight the good fight. But not a good reason to let fear of the unknown rob from us more than what cancer already has.

    I stole all of that out of the bylaws of Crazytown. Those are the rules.

    🎪🎪🎪

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited September 2015

    Hi Everyone,

    Started the day with a nice, home brewed glass of pumpkin spice iced coffee. Too hot here in SoCal for anything not iced!

    Octo, Losing hair is difficult. For me, it was the point when I started to look sick and everyone could see it! My hair follicles tingled and hurt... all over my body. I could barely stand to have clothing touch my skin. I had already cut my hair to a pixie cut by the time it started coming out by the handful. I just stood in the shower and washed my hair away. I cried a bit, then started wearing scarves and hats when I went out. I'm glad to hear the physical pain is subsiding for you.

    Wedding planner... me?!? Holy cow.... that would send me straight to the center of Crazy Town! I think a CT wedding warrants ALL of the residents doing what they do best! It will be fantastic!

    Westphal, You are definitely not being over-dramatic! BS is a BIG deal. I'm still trying to find my new normal. When I was in active treatment, I was busy just trying to get through the day and the treatment. Now I'm trying to spend more time just doing normal people things.... but I'm exhausted, things hurt, my plans have to be more flexible. Last night, was my son's Boy Scout Court of Honor. Several of the families that we have known for over 10 years were there. Everyone said how "good" I looked, even though I felt like cr@p! I think it just needs to be taken a day at a time. Some days will be better than others. Hang in there! Give yourself the gift of time!

    Yesterday I started having acute abdominal pain; low, almost like premenstrual cramps, but sharp. At some point I realized they aren't menstrual cramps. Well, as a resident of Crazy Town does, I woke up in the middle of the night and remembered that my primary physician mentioned that my most recent CT (when I had that horrible abdominal pain end of July) showed a possible small hernia. I have an appt in 40 minutes, so hopefully I'll find out what it is. I don't want it to be a hernia (really! I just turned 51), but at least I don't think it's lower abdominal cancer!

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    JAN, Good to see you! This is a very fast thread. At times it takes me hours to catch up.

    Sula, I have Amazon Prime too. I think I will rent Pink Ribbons this weekend.

    M0mmy, It's so nice to wake up to a hug every morning. Here is one for you as well (((((Mommy)))). The resident hugger needs hugs too!!!!

    Katy, Glad to hear you're feeling better!!!

    Gaia, Great news about the nerve pain. I hope you continue to have pain free days!! We are all going to keep imagining the Herceptin knocking the crap out of your unwelcome visitors. Staying in the present is what I strive for daily. I don't have a creative bone in my body, so the guest list is the perfect job for me. If something needs to be organized, I'm on it.

    Octo, I'm glad you're able to get some rest. When I was on the steroids, they kept me up most of the night. Happy to hear your head stopped hurting. I agree, Crazy Town keeps me sane too.

    Tomboy, I think Octo is holding tight to Gabe!! I'll take cover while you're bouncing off the walls of Crazy Town!! haha

    Westphal, No, I don't think you're being overly dramatic. For me, it took a bit of time for my emotions to catch up to the physical changes. It took some time to mourn my former self. Rather than going back to the way it was, I had to move forward with the way it is by living each day in the moment. Thinking too far ahead is a quick trip to Crazy Town for me. Not sure if that made much sense, but that's how it's been for me.

    dsgirl, I'm glad I was able to make you feel young!!! You know, I always thought lurker sounded so creepy!! From now on, I'll refer to the observers as readers!! Thanks for the suggestion. Great news about the clear mammo!! Doing the happy dance for you!! Thanks for checking in with us....it's always great to see you!!

    image

    PTS, Slow down and listen to the birds!! My dad used to say that in his own cryptic way. It's a shame so many are too busy or driven to listen. Love your attitude!!

    EFT

  • PoppyK
    PoppyK Member Posts: 1,275
    edited September 2015

    3 of us were posting at once! CT is a busy place.

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    Katy, Once again you say what I'm thinking so much better than I ever could. Along with your dream interpretation job, I think you should also be the CT spokesperson!! Then we can all just say....."Yep, what Katy said!" hahaha

    Poppy, We are all In your pocket today!!

    I'm a bit disturbed that all of the ailments you have, I also have. hahaha I have an incisional hernia caused by my colostomy surgery. It makes it more difficult to eat large amounts - full feeling quickly and at times can be painful. Although, it hasn't stopped me from eating!! haha The smaller hernia's have the risk of strangulation. Luckily, mine is a big hole in my stomach, so there isn't much chance of it strangulating, so I just live with it rather than having ANOTHER surgery. The mesh they use in the hernia surgeries has become a concern for some. If you need surgery, ask about the mesh and how it will affect the rest of your innards.

  • shorfi
    shorfi Member Posts: 437
    edited September 2015

    Ok now I'm thinking, what do I have now. I don't want to eat much lately. Seems like the food has no taste. Believe me, I can afford to lose some weight, I mean lots of it. Now I am worried that I have stomach cancer. It's not like me not to want to each much. Or could it be that I am not as greedy as I used to be? After all, I am 61 years young, and I worry often because I can't eat like I used to. I know, you are thinking, oh boy, another crazy!!! Then last night my sweet husband wakes me up to tell me to stop shaking my legs. He said I was going so fast...so I'm worried about that too. Did I have a seizure?

    I'm not trying to be funny ladies, I am just so crazy that I scare myself. I never used to be this way, but dealing with this crap twice makes me wonder if it did something to my brain cells.

    Loopy

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    Disclaimer: Don't look at picture or read post if you have a weak stomach!! Scroll on by!!

    Shocked











    Poppy, Here is a picture of my beautiful stomach. Couldn't get the picture to rotate. This is a side angle.

    image

    The big round area is where I have my hernia. I developed an infection when they did my colostomy, or maybe it was when they did the reversal. I can't remember....the time all blends together. Anyway, there should have been a straight line just like you see above the scar. Because that area was compromised from packing, I developed a hernia. It's freaky because you can actually see it pulse when I'm flat on my back. The top portion of the screen is my colostomy scar. My stomach looks like a road map!!! hahaha

    The scars you see on my knee on the picture I posted yesterday, is a result of the tissue they took out to fill the big wound I had from the flesh eating bacteria. The little round scar on my knee is a drain scar. I also have a long scar on the inside of my thigh from where they did the flap. Also another drain scar. I won't even get into the scars from the butt tissue transfer!! I'm one BIG scar!!

    Tang, You can see the red dots I was talking about. They are bright red...hard to see color on this picture. Not sure if they are like yours or not. It sounded like yours was more of a rash???

    Anyway, that's my share for the day!!

  • SlowDeepBreaths
    SlowDeepBreaths Member Posts: 6,702
    edited September 2015

    shorfi, Sorry....I was typing when you posted.

    You're not any crazier than the rest of us!! I can't imagine going through this twice. Maybe the loss of appetite has to do with being fearful of eating something that may cause it again?? I don't know....just throwing that out there. I felt that way right after diagnosis. I wasn't sure what to eat at that point because I felt I had always eaten pretty well, and I still got the beast. I know our appetites do change as we get older. Have you discussed the loss of appetite with your MO?

    I hope Crazy Town helps you to realize you're not alone in all of this. We all have different fears, but CT does bring us all together. It's nice to be able to get them out here without judgement. Gentle hugs to you!!