CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.
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Mom writer, (and others) thanks for the comforting words about the bald thing....it no longer hurts at night but I am now mostly bald on top but still have hair on the sides. Male pattern baldness: just like my hubby! (I think that might be what Gabe is smiling about about all the time...)
so, I still don't want to buzz it. just going to work on dealing with it. But today was a bit tough. Went to work, feeling all good about putting in a full day first day post chemo round two but wore a wide headband with my Giants hat on top, (of course). The only meeting I had was with my boss, who knows what is going on and is very good about not making snarky or stupid remarks (and has been wonderful, overall: I just can't help but think that perhaps the fact that he had cancer as a child is part of the reason that, even after all these years, he still gets it...) So, anyway, boss is very nice though he hadn't seen me in a while, thanks to the fact that he just returned from a well-deserved vacation, meeting went well, I was very productive...BUT...just when I was feeling so good about everything, a co-worker (who I certainly don't know well enough or work closely enough with to want to share) walks by my office, pokes her head into my office as I am concentrating on a document on the computer, and says "Oh, I see you are having a bad hair day, today." Ok, aside from the fact that she may feel STUPID for the STUPID remark when she finally does figure out what is going on: why the hell would anyone think that it is anything but very, very rude to comment on a coworkers appearance in that matter? Ugh!
Meanwhile, Dodgers are leading.:-( Beat LA!
it looks like the shutdown will probably be averted, at least for now, but I will be royally pissed if all of that happens over an organization that has done as much or more for so many women (including me, at times) as PP has....
Hugs to all.
Octogirl
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Big group hug for you Octo!! I know that's M0mmy's job, but I reserve the right for emergency group hugs!!
I thought the picture was appropriate for our foodporn thread. haha
I've heard and read all the stuff about hair. Be grateful that you're alive, at least it will grow back....blah, blah, blah. While all those things are so very true, I didn't realize how devastated I would be to lose my hair. My hair was my cloak of invisibility. Once gone, I felt naked and exposed. I'm not sure why people at work can't keep their opinions to themselves. As we say on the stupid thread....there is no cure for stupid.
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(not asleep yet)
Octo- WTF is up with the coworker. Would you ever say that to anybody you hardly know under any circumstances? The thing is, I'm sure you are beautiful right now- that's one thing other people could see that I couldn't when I lost my hair or was growing it back very short- they said you could see the bone structure and they liked it-- and I wish I had appreciated that more while I was in it. Because I do see that in others.
WHATEVER WHATEVER WHATEVER WHATEVER
I AM AFRAID at the SAME TIME as
WHATEVER WHATEVER WHATEVER WHATEVER
cause it is what it is
and I yam what I yam
(For me the "routine" scans always are scary, and have always invited further testing, and therefore more scariness. There is a mini emotional earthquake combined with PTSD from the original dx, that occurs with each callback for further testing. After each quake and aftershock, I have to recalibrate. Being in Crazytown gives me a safe place to recalibrate- to get over the distraction of the aftershocks and integrate it all into my daily life as best I can. )
And so glad to see Mary Poppins (the friendly Julie Andrews version) and Mr. Potts. I want to jump into one of those paintings and ride a merry go round horse through the hills and valleys-- we can do anything in Crazy Town- yay!.
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octo, hugs to you. You exhibited a lot of grace with the Co worker.
I am loving my wig, especially now that it is cooler. Most compliment on my hair. There are only 10 others in the department so they all know. Only 7 people have seen me top less. I am not brave. I call my makeup my war paint and jewelry my armour so the wig must be my shield. It does empower me. After 4 weeks PFC I have very sparse 1/4 inch.
Katy, good answer for etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. I am a fool for musicals.
So lurkers, readers, ghosts or perhaps since we are in the big top how about mimes or clowns?? Send in the clowns.
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Doesn't that feel good momwriter?????????
rose, that musical is right on the tip of my tongue (fingers). I can't access the file in my brain!!
Edited to add: I've always loved that song.
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ok, I am starting to go into CT...over a crazy, crazy thing: when I got home from work I poured myself a big glass of water and put half a lime into...sipping on it this evening while I ate and watched this debacle (so far) of a game and telling you all my sad story of the co-worker from hell...(and yes, I was too gracious to her: I just nodded and said 'yep' and pretended to be so engrossed in my computer that I couldn't even look up. Because if I had I probably would have given her the pink finger...) But I digress, I also had to deal tonight with swallowing all the post chemo pills and having hubby give me a neuprogen shot...and went to take a final sip before heading to bed (I REFUSE to watch the Dodgers clinch on my home turf, but if I wake up and Giants are still in it, well yay)...
But I digress again (blame the steroids): I go to take my final sip of water... and the half a lime is gone!!! WTF!!! I look all around to make sure it didn't fall out....no, no lime. anywhere. Could I have been so out of it or pumped on steroids that I somehow swallowed it without even knowing I did? Well, I did have hiccups earlier: is that why? In any case, too late to worry about swallowing it, as it is obviously gone...but what will happen to my digestive track when it shows up again? Can my body handle that?
Just got off the crazy town exit but trying to remind myself: WHATEVER. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever could half a lime do? One of you creative crazies will need to find a song for that.Octogirl
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The King and I, Rogers and Hammerstein
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Here's your song octo
OK it's put the lime in the coconut, it shows and plays when I try to edit, what's up?
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Brother bought a water cup
He bought it for a dime.
His sister had another one
She trade it for the lime.
She put the lime in the water cup
she drank them both up.
She put the lime in the water cup
she called doctor, woke him up, and said
"Doctor, ain't there nothing I can take?"
I said, "Doctor to relieve this belly ache?"
I said, "Doctor ain't there nothing I can take?"
I said, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
Now let me get this straight;
You put the lime in the water cup
You drank them both up
You put the lime in the water cup
You drank them both up
put the lime in the water cup,
you drank them both up
put the lime in the water cup,
called your doctor, woke him up and said,
"Doctor, ain't there nothing I can take?"
I said, "Doctor to relieve this belly ache?"
I said, "Doctor ain't there nothing I can take?"
I said, "Doctor, to relieve this belly ache?"
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Seriously though Octo....maybe you forgot to put the lime in the cup and put it in the trash instead??? That's something I would do!!
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thanks slow, was trying to insert the video.
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thank you, SDB (and rosesrx), I knew I could count on you! Will go to bed happy with a song in my head.
And no, I didn't throw it away, seriously. I don't think. who knows. All I know is it is well past my bed time since the Giants are losing, so off to bed for me.
xox
Octo
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Hey there Crazies,
Just trying to keep up with this super long thread!! I actually had to go bring my laptop downstairs as it's difficult to keep up with all of this stuff just on my ipad.
I don't even know where to start.....Octo, I'm glad you're keeping the Giants on the mojo track. Even though I was born and raised in SF and lived for many years in LA I never quite bonded with the Dodgers. I went to Dodger games but I also went to Angels games. What I really liked was basketball and I am a real Lakers fan just as superstitious about them as you are about the Giants..and yeah I'm a Giants person too since my very first ball game was at the old Candlestick. As for the co-worker....
I'm just probably tired and cranky tonight we've been working on this new script all day. One of my best friends said to me the week before I started chemo that she wanted me to leave her my Max Mara coat in my will...wtf!!!!!! Luckily as a writer I have always worked out of our home office, but it's all those people outside!!!! grrrrrr. I hope the lime digests smoothly, though I can't imagine you'd swallow something like that unaware. Maybe it's tucked away somewhere.
Slow,
that is so brave sharing all of that with us, we all have our scars that we live with, you've certainly had your share. I love the Whatever!!!!!!!
Momwriter,
totally get you on the test, scans etc. Having been down this road before it does take a toll mentally
Rainn,
glad you are still on the mend
Jack,
ok so I'll never suggest you become the official CT accountant...though flowers and dream interpretation sounds a whole helluva lot better...and more fun. Thanks for turning us on to Pink Ribbons Inc. Even though I've heard and read about a lot of this stuff in the past and even joined Breast Cancer action back in 1991..it truly was eye opening. We are all on this crazy ride/crapshoot doing the best we can. Yes, early detection is great and we are grateful for that but it really is no guarantee and until we join together and really press for a permanent treatment/cure for stage IV (such as they got for HIV) it's all our fight no matter what stage we're at. Since we have Amazon prime the movie was free, so just putting it out there for anyone interested in seeing it. Really worth your time.
Gaia,
so glad you're feeling better, yay for no more pain! Working on that virtual wedding cake for you.
Tom,
I hear ya about the Lakers!!!!!! I love that dragonfly btw.
I know I'm missing a whole bunch of you..shofi and ducky, you guys are both in the same city? That's so good.
All of you Ca peeps seem to be down south...out of my range up here in Wine country, but yeah with enough warning I'd cook for you. Right now stuff is pretty crazy around here however...lots of stuff going on with writing and food.
Ok, so I'm pretty watsed now..I'll lurk for a but then slowly wend my way upstairs. Cheers and love to all of you and those that I'm not remembering..sweet dreams!
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Morning all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sending a hug out to all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))
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Rain, I think it is great that you are thinking of all the folks in your life who sent meals now. Clearly there is a reason why your pals reached out to help you. Now what to do for them~~~no ideas yet but sure this gang will come up with stuff.
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Octo- I'm so sorry about it all.. The worst is since you're the town bouncer, technically you'd have to throw your own stupid co-worker out!
For this reason, it occurs to me we need an assistant bouncer to help Octo deal when people are stupid to her. I know Gabe tries, but like she said, he smiles all the time!
Any takers for assistant bouncer?
Seriously, Octo. Sorry about the lime (but Slow I was deeelighted ((as TR used to say)) with the "lime in the coconut, drink it all up....? I said DOCTOR...." song). Now that happy song will be in my head all day, which is ok. Part of acting as if. So to continue. The lime will turn up or it won't. It won't hurt you. Stomach acid is powerful stuff. I bet you find it behind some appliance on the counter or under the counter overhang on the floor in a couple of months. The Giants. I'm grieving for you. Especially since I understand the crazy mojo magical connections we make, which brings me yo your hair. Mine hurt too, even though I shaved mine the day after chemo. I didn't want to go through the falling out moments after moments. So I took control and didn't ever regret it. I'm not suggesting you do the same, but whatever path you take, it will stop being uncomfortable and it will grow back. The steroids. I can't believe you are actually sleeping. That's good. I am thinking a lot about you right now. I know today is day 3, chemo 2. You are doing great. I wish I had more clever or sincere sounding words this morning for you. I feel my tone is caught between the two. The caring is real. My humor must be out to lunch. Hopefully it will come back. I wish you a splendid day. The best possible. Hugs.
PS- my beloved mother was the biggest Laker fan there ever was. Therefore, I am. Aside from tennis, there was no other sport she followed, and I mean religiously. How I miss her. I often wonder what it would have been like to have her, or my Dad, or my brother Peter, during these miserable months. Having my Mom for me during chemo... Wow. Just thinking about it and now the tears are streaming. Next exit, Crazytown!
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Octo- I thought I'd share a little photo session I just did for you. Here is what's under the hat- my bone structure and a bit of hair. In a few more weeks it's going to look like I'm doing it on purpose- the hairdo that is.
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Katy, you look absolutely great! Thanks for sharing the light at the end of the tunnel!
The funny thing is, one of my prides of my life was my hair: it was thick, and best of all, almost no grey hairs, right up till when it started falling out at age 61 (just now). Actually, I do (did) look younger than my age (or so people always told me and I believed them :-)) and I think the total lack of grey was part of the reason. I never, ever have colored my hair. That said, I was seeing maybe a few grey hairs just before it started falling out, and I have the feeling it may come back more grey. I will wear it with just as much pride.
Update on the lime: I checked the garbage just because I am worried my brain is going with my hair and I threw it away and can't remember. No lime in the garbage. Ok, I am compulsive. BUT, I don't have a tummy ache so I am not calling Doctor, Doctor. At least not yet.
Hugs to all (and thanks to Mommy for my hug this am!)
Octogirl
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Katy, you look adorabley elfin! Your hair totally looks like you did it on purpose. And such pretty eyes!
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I had some grey, but it blends in well with strawberry blond. Just thought you might like to see the before. I don't notice my bone structure AT ALL!!! Teehee. this was a couple of weeks before chemo started.
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Mom, thank you for the morning hugs, I love them! Katy, you have such a wide open kind face. I think you should go mint green and lavender, like me!
I love the lakers! Except for the part where they keep getting rid of some of my favorites, PAO GASOL!?! You mean I don't get to see his handsome face?? Robert Horry, but I see they are letting Meta world Peace back in, sorta- he was beside himself and so happy when he acquired his ring with them!
Sula, does that happen to be Prior from Tony Kushners' Angels in America? It moves kinda fast, can't really tell. My favorite play.
I think I found us a bouncer, from outside, but he might be nice to have around:
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Katy, I think you are lovely both ways! me I stopped coloring my hair when I decided I really wanted to retire and needed to save as much as possible. Also since I am sort of challenged regarding fussy with my hair, when I get it cut, I keep going shorter!
I may end up in CT from the weather reports, they are bringing up the dreaded name of Sandy regarding the new hurricane developing along the coast. Sandy is still a bad dream as it hit dead on about a mile down the road from me
hmmmm, maybe I should figure out how to work the dang emergency radio I bought a while ago
is there a room for hurricane scared folks?
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Right here with you on the weather, Proud. But weather.com says still too soon to tell if it's coming in our direction. Yes, the memories of Sandy are still fresh, though we were lucky.
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morning Crazies....waving from the dentists office...I'd rather be getting herceotin than a teeny tiny cavity filled!
Later Gators0 -
Tomboy- thanks for the funny song in monkey suits. Lmao.
And yes to an outside bouncer! That way Octo can come to the prom when we have it. Right Poppy? He would be nice to have around. Probably so long as he doesn't talk much.
Thank you Iris. I have never died (my hair- I know none of us are getting out of here alive) and I don't think I will. It has been nice in the dog days of summer to be so ...well.. Pixie- like! Haha.
And Iris- Speaking of hurricanes- I think we have some ready-to-occupy housing in CT for anyone who needs evacuation. Already soothingly furnished and with all modern conveniences, except no microwaves. I'm afraid of them now too. Get that radio running and stay in contact. A block away from you. Wow. Cannot even imagine. How many stresses does it take to cause PTSD? We will get you through this. You too, Ducky, Rainny and Shorfi. My brother and family live in Springfield, just outside Philly. He's very stoic.
I think we need an emergency housing director. There should always be a safe place for a Crazy to stay. The stupid people Octo rounds up can clean those houses between stays.
Remodeling update- amazingly, they just finished the bathroom. He even put a little extra bling tile at the bottom of the insets he tiled in to store fizzy bombs and shampoo. Pics later after it is cleaned up. They are doing the kitchen countertops now. Says it will be all done by tomorrow! This guy works like a demon. And I got 3 quotes. His price was best. But I went with him because his wife works in my real estate agent's office and I wanted some leverage if I needed it. I didn't.
Sula- I hate the dentist. I get gas now even for cleanings. I am such a wuss. I figure I'm done with any suffering I can control. Fuck. It. I'm sending mojo. And reminding you of your adorable coffee cup you shared on the pinktober thread. I drink my virtual coffee (anything over 2 real ones) out if it every day.
I am Crazy you know!
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Tomboy! You went and shared my boy-toy with the group! No photo shop for him; he looks like this in real life, but (thankfully) less shiny!
Katy, I'm with you on the as long as they don't talk bit. But, let me assure you, this guy has a deep, silky voice and speaks quietly with an English accent (he can also do an American accent). So, we may want him to speak occasionally! ;-)
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Love the pink mug. I think I need one!
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Katy...I think about my mom a lot and wish that she was here with me during my treatment for the second time. Had wonderful support from my loving husband, son, friends, family members, co-workers, even the ex-husband and all his family...but there is nothing like having your mother with you doing bad times like dealing with cancer. No matter what age we are, I wish my mom were here with me.
I love your hair style and the color. {{{{{hugs}}}}}}
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Thanks Shorfi- I appreciated that share. I live alone and don't work. I am not the type ordinarily to be lonely. However.Without these women here I'm not sure I could have completed tx. Absolute lifesavers.
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