My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Goldens-Love those cards-especially the one with the deer.
Mara-I too missed your news. Hope you have peace of mind now.
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Goldens- Very nice!!!!
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Thank you all 😁
@intolight you are right about endurance.
I tend to downplay troubles and in some ways 7 years of cancer has been easier than I expected but when really thinking about it, I have been through so much. The brain surgery recovery and paralyzed vocal cord were more difficult than I like to admit. Surviving that without it crushing my optimism still surprises me.
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You have a great way about you Mae. You’re strong as hell!!
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@shanagirl, I, too, am overwhelmed by the love and support of the dear ladies on this forum and in this group. It always breaks my heart to read of those with progression, and now I’m there. It’s so hard to know what to say when people ask how we are doing. I think I measure my response based on how much they already know, how much I think they really want to know, and how much energy I have to go into details. “Pretty good” is usually a fairly safe response.
I love the Cheezits story! It made my day. Our last dog had to have some eardrops. One dose and then a few minutes later, the next dose. He’d get treats after the doses, so every time he’d hear the timer, he came racing into the kitchen to get his treat. Silly boy!
Sf-cakes, I’ll take a cookie or two if you have any spares. I think I could get those down. Two friends have recently brought me food. Mac and cheese (YUM) and cheesy grits (also, YUM) along with some rice pudding and some other baked treats. I can swallow the baked treats if I take my time. I’ve been adding protein powder to Ensure for some extra calories and protein.
I hate hearing about those who are no longer part of our group – those who were MURDERED by cancer. I’m thankful they are beyond suffering but hate what this disease does to us.
My next blog post is in progress. I won’t publish it until I’ve told my dad and sister about my progression. I don’t feel my death in eminent, but I asked a dear, childhood friend if he would do my memorial service. His dad was our pastor, he’s now a pastor, and he was almost like a brother to me growing up. He said that he absolutely would.
Irish, I’m so sorry about DH’s issues. I hope they can resolve his issues quickly. It seems like this would be a good example of “pulling your neighbor’s ox out of the ditch” even if it’s their Sabbath. Jesus was all about service, especially on the Sabbath. I’m glad, though, that your stomach issues have appeared to settle down a bit.
Mara, I missed your news, too, but am glad it was good news!
To all I haven’t mentioned, you are the dearest ladies on earth!
Love, hugs, and chocolate for all.
Carol
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I'd like some advice or points of view. I'm on a new drug (Orserdu). I starting having mild intermittent RUQ pain, bone pain, and right sided H/A, but now at the end of bottle #3 most of this pain has resolved, especially the H/A. I had bone scans and CT of abd/chest and results are mixed - some lesions stable - some with progression. I'm to stay on the drug. Because of the H/A complaint a MRI brain scan was also ordered and is scheduled for early next week. Because I have lobular I worry about brain mets and eye mets, but since the H/A has resolved I'm thinking of canceling the MRI (I assume now H/A was a side effect of the Orserdu). My MO says I can cancel. My husband and family want me to have it done because they think I second-guess myself too often.
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Irish I'm sorry to hear about DH , I truly wish I had a magic wand for you two. Every week I feel like it's something and you guys just don't get a break! Ramping up the prayers.
Shanagirl Perfectly said! Nothing compares to the support by everyone in this room. Half the time I feel like"hello…I'm still treading water over here" .I may look fine on the outside but my inside says something different. I gave up on what to say to people anymore and I do think they hate to ask too. Omg love the Chez-it story, hysterical!
Goldens Those cards are gorgeous! I love the 3D look, so cool!
weniwi Well glad your headaches resolved. So you think it was caused by Orserdu? You could always wait and if they restart schedule for the MR? Also if you feel ok with having MR to be certain that works too, it may ease your mind. If you have a deductible for your insurance that has been met this year maybe you may want to have it before the end of the year? I guess follow your gut or run it by your MO maybe they would still encourage you to have it. I would be leaning more on the side of having it done so there are no "what if's".
Hope everyone has a restful night.
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Good evening all you wonderful gals. I think Mae is right that we try to skip over the negatives of this disease as much as possible. My sister always says "It is what it is". I think we all look forward to stable days and try to bypass that damn saying, yet knowing it is what it is. Back a few months ago I had read a post saying "things" settle down a year after diagnosis. I keep hoping that there is truth to that.
Thank you all for prayers. DH still in hospital, but NO surgeon showed up. Kinda doubtful for tomorrow, so I guess Monday. It would be good if he could get his original surgeon from 3 weeks ago that did the herneia surgery to begin with. Hope the drain does the trick and no further treatment will be needed. That trip to PA for Christmas is slipping away. sigh…
Carol, progression is that word that we all fear. I believe you will knock it back into oblivion. I know this story isn't your story, but it offers so much hope. A very good (retired Police Office)r friend of ours had esophogeal cancer, stage 4. He had surgery, chemo and radiation and had a lengthy remission of many years. Hold on to hope and we will be right there with you.
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Thank you for all the positive comments on my creations! Cookie, those are actually on 12x12 artist boards. But I am starting my Christmas cards. Spent all day yesterday sorting through paper and trying different combinations. Started 2 cards but still much work to be done. I only send a handful of handmade cards out to the people that appreciate them.
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goldens LOl I have to laugh at myself…I saw cards but was thinking hmmm they look a little large for cards hahaha. Nevertheless I l love them and will look forward to your post pic of your cards.
Irish that would be wonderful if drain and IV antibiotics does the job. Fingers crossed.
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I swear, the only way I can remember who said what is to start a Word document, then scroll back through the comments and hope I didn’t miss one.
Weninwi, go with your gut. I personally would want the MRI just to “know.” But that’s just me. I have my MRI today, assuming the equipment isn’t down again.
Irish, thinking of you and DH today. I hope the surgeon at least stops by today. I appreciate your story about your friend. This feels like a death sentence right now, but I’m hoping things will “settle down” as we get into the next phase of treatment.
Waving hi to cookie, goldens and all the rest of you lovelies!
Carol
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sunshine 99, I am still sewn into shirt permanently sending you healing thoughts and love as well.
Mae, happy cancerversary to you. Might as well celebrate an accomplishment. My ninth anniversary when it was first found was 9 years ago this february I alsways get something sweet to snack on.
Shanagirl, I actually love tech problems as that is one area I am particularly good at due to stubborness when things do not work for me the way I feel they should.
Goldens, I love the pictures on the wall, they are lovely.
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Thank you for the good wishes on Stable, I have been lucky thus far. In that vein, I am going to start a workout that gets me to white oaks mall and back with a burger joint in the middle. I figure if the weather is decent, start by walking short distances and taking the bus back. I won't try to just hop out and do it, must be gradual since it is almost eight miles roundtrip. I also will not attempt if weather is hot. Can walk around mall for a generous number of steps and visit burger joint if I wish. If my body is generally healthy and no impediments to doing it other than really hot weather, I want that ability back. I don't care if have to use walking sticks or cane. It will probably be months anyway and not doing this in summer, then I may bus to different places. Saving Paratransit for appointments now that the road is done. Treadmill training will be key as well. I do have a walker that I can sit in but find it awkward. Winter will be a consideration too.
So far today, started laundry and a couple things, keeping closer eye on mail. I am also doing laundry, have a towel covered in a tea stain but I will kill it. Might take couple of washes. Made up my own heavy duty cleaner out of borax, wash soda, tide detergent, hydrogen peroxide and oxyclean powder. Small amounts of each, mixed together with hot water, next time will make it small as I didn't account for the foaming. Laundry will soak a bit for now.
Foodwise, still loving the salad, favourite is the one that has lettuce, cabbage, carrots and other veggies, I don't need it to be romaine though dressings are still ranch and caesar mostly. Lettuce is lasting longer for me storing in salad spinner, after initial spin, just spin after every use and wipe out bottom, way less spoiled lettuce. I am planning to do an experiment on turning beans, beefless ground and cheese into more of a salad topper type vibe. I discovered I could make a very dense and not so much crunchy but still something that could possibly be torn apart and put into a salad. I thinking of it like the taco strips I enjoy so much or the bacon bits, give me something new to do as well. I will post if it was any good.
As usual, I hope everyone has a good day, I know Thanksgiving is coming up so all spending time with family, friends or self, happy early Thanksgiving. Treat yourself to something nice for dinner even if by yourself. I am always in any pocket I need to be in lending support to myself included to meet that walking goal as well.
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Haha Mara the visual of you "sewn into shirt" cracked me up. That's amazing! Congratulations on 9 years!
Carol I am there also with you for the MRI and as you navigate through this.
Mae congratulations on 7 years!
Irish prayers still for you and DH.
Weninwi I feel like I wouldn't be sure what to do either. I would probably scan just to give myself piece of mind but that's me and my own paranoia. The few times I've talked myself out of pursuing further medical investigation I have regretted it.
I guess I don't know what to consider my cancerversary. December 7, 2019 is my 4 year metastatic diagnosis February 2018 was when this whole thing started. It seems like it should be longer than that. It's funny how time seems to fly and at the same time not move fast at all. Not much planned for today. Laundry and picking up around the house as my energy levels tolerate. I was up throwing up again last night. I couldn't keep any meds down so my neuropathy is a little more flared this morning. I'm in pockets for all who need me with my Granny's crescent rolls. I have to run a few practice batches before Thanksgiving so I get them right.
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Emac, I use my diagnosis date as my cancerversary but I only found the lump 2 weeks earlier, so not much difference there.
Planning on being kinda lazy this week, it’s going to be cold with temps in the 30’s and 40’s. DH will cook the bird and I’ll do the sides, just boxed stuffing, green bean casserole and mashed potatoes. No Thanksgiving guests this year, so we are keeping it simple.
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Emac, I am glad to see four years but am sorry to hear about the vomiting last night, hopefully you feel better today, in your pocket for sure.
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My brunch was delicious. I did do the beans, bran with cheese on top on a plate after chopping. 90 seconds undercover in microwave, took my southwest type salad, put on top after beans and cheese cooled. The dressing provided was good, got some corn and other seasoning in bag and parm cheese and added some santa fe taco strips. They were really good and reminded me of a taco taste from a restaurant. I cannot find the lid to the chopper so macgyvered a lid from plastic wrap, a large elastic wrapped around and narrow tipped scissors to start the machine. I know the lid is around and will show up.
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Oh @mara51506 you just totally amaze me with your energy. 😊💗 l love your energy
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Yes Mara, I can’t get over the way you handle absolutely everything in your daily life! All you sisters amaze me - despite this damn disease I feel like all of you rise and shine despite the hardships. The caring that we have for each other brings tears to my eyes - but they are actually tears of joy. One thing is for certain, you sisters carry yourself with such grace that I am humbled by all of you. HUGS.
Plus I’ve been listening to Christmas music today - and that makes me so sentimental.
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You’re adorable Goldens !
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Waving hello to all the wonderful folks out there. I hope that the day found you feeling a bit better and scans were good. With Mara sewed into a pocket, bound to have a positive effect.
DH still has not had surgery. No surgeon was available this weekend. Huh??? This is a town of almost 100,000 people! He is at the new hospital that just opened Aug.1. It's a beautiful and clean facility. Plenty of nurses, both RN's and CNA's. So I just don't understand the hold up on surgeon availability. So I guess tomorrow will be surgery and I have IV infusion, labs and injections, that I had already postponed once before. Hopefully DD will be able to take me to see husband and for treatment. I haven't driven in 3 years (my choice, due to MS tremors).
Enjoying a cup of hot tea and sitting on my fav chair. It sounds like Mae is gonna to have a cold Turkey day. Hope it passes quickly and everyone is safe. Busy driving holiday for sure.
In pockets for all that need and thank you all for your support. It is so sweet… Or as Jackie Gleason use to say "How sweet it is"!
Laurel
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Hello ladies. Good morning. Afternoon. Lol. Just thinking of you all and wanted to check in on you. Hugs and love to you wonderful ladies. In pockets. As needed with snacks. Can’t wait for Christmas cookies. I’d like to share pictures of our trees again this year ! I love to see all the different styles. It’s my favorite part. I’ve noticed people are decorating earlier this year than other years past. Interesting how every year it gets earlier and earlier. I’m almost done my shopping. Now onto stocking stuffers. Wrapping. I still have to get gift cards. I’m sending my mom cash. Even though she’s in hospice she still likes her sweets. That way she can get whatever she wants. I have a strong knowledge that this will be her last Christmas. She’s deteriorating. Have a good day ladies.
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Good evening Mel and ladies of the porch. Oh I would love to see Christmas trees and families gathered around. Mel you are sure ahead of me. Sweets for your sweet Mama to buy sounds like a great idea. We would send dark chocolate creams to my Grammy for Christmas. Angel and Phelps in Daytona is known far and wide for their home made candies. I think a pound costs more then a Filet. Hmmm, I'll take the candy. lol
So DH had his surgery today. Turned out it wasn't a surgeon problem, it was an Interventional Radiologist not available this past weekend, problem. He had the beginning of sepsis. I'm so thankful he finally listened and went to ER. The yucky infection is draining. I'm not sure when they will let him come home. Kids coming in from Charlotte tomorrow instead of Wednesday. I'm so thankful for that one day early arrival as storms are gonna disrupt traffic and AAA says heaviest traffic for this holiday since 2000 is expected!
Had a very long day. Got Zometa infusion, fluvestrant shots in the arse (ouch) and two tries to draw blood. Done for a month. Hurray. I had asked Humana to approve Xgeva and they did. I had to turn it down due to $500 a month copay. Not in our budget. Financial aide lady tried to get the price down but no response from drug manufacturer. It's ok, I've gotta worry about Ibrance with Pfizer letter changing Patient Assistance Program. Still do not know what if any $$$ they will decide on this year since there "new" requirements.
Stay safe Mae and others in Texas and the 3 to 4 states dealing with tornadoes.
Laurel
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Irish Glad to hear your Dh is on the mend now. Thank God you didn't delay ER visit, yep sepsi is no joke. Sending prayers and well wishes. Ugh I hope you get some help for the Xgeva it's disgraceful that we even have to speak of this! Fingers crossed.
Mel Wow your really on the ball…love it! I did start shopping online this past weekend which I do lots of now. Although I don't buy as many physical gifts as I use to with the kids being young adults now. I'm sure your gift will brighten your mom's day. Glad to hear she still like her sweets! Half of my neighborhood has their Christmas decorations up also. I wait until after Thanksgiving ,probably this weekend since my daughter will be here to put up the tree with me. I feel like do if it brings you joy then do it!
Mara You cracked me up with being sewn in the pocket …love it!
Safe travels to anyone and their families this week. Today is a big prep day for me here I try to space it out so I'm not overwhelmed. Plus the nerve of cancer…I have treatment tomorrow 🙄Whatever right …it will all get done.
Hi to all and coffee cheers for a good day☕️💕
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Good morning my living room lady friends. Sitting here having my coffee ☕️ and reading some of the good news and dearest friend
@irishlove wow that Sepsis is nothing to fool around with. I’m glad your beloved DH is having it resolved and hope he will feel better soon. I get that you had a long day with your treatments, stay strong you two. 💗
@micmel I didn’t get ahead of Christmas shopping 🛍️ this year. I’m getting ready for Thanksgiving at our house with the kids. I’m looking forward to cooking the turkey and stuffing @ a few appetizers. The kids are bringing the rest. I love this time of year. I used to go all out with table scape, lights and decorations and then the next day DH starts doing the Christmas lights outside. ♥️
Hi everyone. 👋.
I’m wishing you all a wonderful day . It’s going to rain 🌧️ and my bones are feeling it. I’m just hoping I can get through today without the big D and headache and nausea today. Headaches have been really bothering me with all the side effects of the shots lat Wednesday. Hopefully today will be better.2 -
Good morning to some of my favorite people! Thanksgiving is two days away! We’re at my dad’s place and my sister arrived yesterday afternoon. Of course, we’ve been talking nonstop. I think it amuses and pleases my dad. I told my sister about my progression. We’ll probably tell my dad today. Not looking forward to that.
Irish, at first I thought you meant the interventional radiologist was in the beginning of sepsis! Anyway, I’m glad DH finally got his surgery and even has the yucky drains in. I hope he can heal quickly.
I got a message about a test report being available. It was for my brain MRI. Can’t really understand the whole report, but I did see the words, “no change” and DID NOT see the words “new metastasis” so I guess that’s a good thing.
Mara, I wondered what that lump in my pocket was – now I know! I’m wearing scrubs and they have lots of pockets, so I have lots of room for everyone. I have homemade scones, but you’ll have to dig through my pockets to find them. They’re yummy!
Oh, and I heard from Guardant 360 yesterday. I told them to proceed with the test of the sample they were sent and hoping this doesn’t cost me $5k!
Waving hi to all.
Carol
(Eyes not working well this am. Pardon any typos!)
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Good morning to everyone in the living room. I am sitting here with my cup of coffee reading and praying as I go.
Carol, I am glad there is a shimmer of good news in your report. Praying for you daily as you inform you family of your latest challenge.
Irish, I am glad you got through a rough day with your treatments, and your DH is on the mend.
Shanagirl, praying you are free of side effects from your shots too.
Mara, you are in my pocket too. It is good we have deep pockets!
I am one of those with a fully decorated house already. We chose to get it up early while it was still warm(ish) outside. Now I am crocheting some last minute gifts and enjoying an elongated season Christmas shopping through Amazon. Tomorrow we will visit Santa's Village with my DD and DGD (in the mountains nearby about an hour's drive.) Thursday we will drive across town and share in Thanksgiving Dinner with the BIL and his family. I will bring a couple of side dishes and my latest crochet project. They lost their beloved dog a couple of months ago and this will be my first visit since then. We are bringing Princess but I know it is hard for them. He was very special. The predicted storm won't hit us until Friday and we will hunker down. I have always avoided Black Friday shopping trips and this year the weather is supposed to be disruptive. I am thankful for online shopping! Be safe everyone!
Wishing everyone a blessed Thanksgiving free of pain.
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Irishlove, I am so happy to hear that your husband is getting treated for the infection. Your shots do make for a long day, I still don't know how people handle the health care through insurance companies, in your pocket that all works out your way.
Thank you for everyone for your support. When it comes to trying to solve problems, I try. Turned out, the lid to the chopper fell or I put by accident in the salad bowl I use. I found it and am back to normal.
Not sure what breakfast will be, thinking of chopping up some beans and wheat bran, make same texture as beefless ground, add usual cheese on top, put on plate with lid and microwave as usual. Add an egg, poached I think. Will be healthy, running low on salad so will need a trip to the store once freezing rain weather is over. I've not yet noticed if the entire street is finished or if they are still working to put in driveway pavement. Also planning to buy my own salt for salting back steps, just the pet , grass and concrete safe variety. That way, can hopefully avoid major ice. I do plan to start paratransit next week when I have Herceptin.
When it comes to Christmas, we usually go out for a supper but still don't do anything Christmas Eve or Christmas day, that is all good for me. We also don't buy gifts as they know my income is low though I did splurge when I took them out last week. I chose to be alone, watch movies and usually splurge on something delicious or whatever and watch movies. I do enjoy seeing Christmas lights and know DB will take us on a tour of the lights, if weather not bad, may get out and check them out myself.
I am still going to work toward walking to the mall though. Sometimes, I think using my walker might be good for the seat but still have to drag it up and down stairs here at my building. I will look into that later. Would prefer walking and finding strategic benches to use, this will probably start once spring comes.
Hope all have a Happy Thanksgiving and in pockets always.
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We are in Bath again for a few days just to get away. They are putting up Christmas everywhere - big tree in front of the cathedral, some Christmas market stalls from Thursday, and the hotel had a team in today to put up their tree and decorate the balcony (unfortunately along the side I need to grab but at least there is an elevator). I did 9K steps yesterday and another 6K today (half of that up and down a fairly steep hill!) and boy am I feeling it, but I rest when I need to. And I do in fact have a small rads burn in the groin crease so been making like Winnie the Pooh in the room when hubs goes out to wander. Frankly its just nice being somewhere else and not having cats up in my face constantly.
I miss Thanksgiving though, such a nice buffer before the Xmas season. Here it seems to start earlier every year. I rely on you ladies for Tgiving food updates!
Sounds like some tentative good news for quite a few of us after tough years - long may it last!
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Waving hello to all the lovely ladies (and gents) this evening. In pockets for everyone's needs. It's good to ready about family gatherings and trips to Bath and the holiday decorations. Sure does pick up one's spirit.
DS and DDL arrived from Charlotte a day early. They said it was the worst traffic they've encountered during holiday travel. The rain and traffic accidents added 2 hours onto their drive time. They are tucked in at nearby motel and I'm babysitting Goose, their 100 lb pit bull that's afraid of cats and other dogs and mice and probably fleas. lol She's 9 and such a sweetheart.
Thank you all again for your thoughts and prayers for DH. I reread my post and could see I didn't make much sense about IR not being located and NO, the IR did not have sepsis. DH had the beginnings of sepsis. Lots of yucky drainage still coming out. I'm so thankful he listened to me and went to the hospital. We don't know when he can come home. Won't be the same turkey day without him carving the bird.
Neuro appt. tomorrow and then next appt. is Tuesday for pet scan. As for shopping, just one gift to buy for DGD. She wants a virtual reality setup. We will put some $$ in envelope for our adult children and spouses to buy what they want. DH and I will delay our present to each other until we can travel home to PA. Probably gonna wait until Easter time.
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