My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Keetmom~That chocolate dipped licorice sounds delicious. I would like some please lol. Has your snow melted? It's still here and it's below freezing! Sight windy also! I already knew you'd be watching those packers! It's that kinda day. Sit inside warm, watching the football.! Enjoy. Hugs to the girls. Much love ~M~
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Gracie, Micmel is right, toss back a valium or Ativan, whichever, and let yourself relax! You should not be in such a state. You and I are in the same boat Tuesday, except your scan is already done. I still have to do mine, but at least I dont have to wait for my results. i am concerned about how much progression I have had. Please take something calming, grab a hot chocolate or a hot cup of tea and watch a nice movie! Call Micmel if you need to here someones voice or if you want I will pm you my number and you can call me anytime. Hang on Gracie, only a couple more days. Try to remember, what will be, will be. You have us for support! I hate the idea of a different treatment. It stinks, but at least we have lots of options! I don't know about you, but I am no where near ready to go yet! So, the fight goes on! I am sending you gentle hugs and I will be holding your hand Tuesday, Ihope you will be holding mine too!
Leapfrog, Pictures, pictures please! Sounds wonderful!
Mae, That picture really touched my heart! What a beautiful site! I love that you will be at a higher elevation! Ooooh, it sounds awesome! I bet you feel like you can reach out and pluck one from the sky!
Micmel, You sound good! Glad to hear!
Minnie, Hope you didn't blow away in those high winds! We got pretty cold here last night!
Hugs and Prayers everyone,
Claudia
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Well, the oncologist put me on an antibiotic on Fri, as well as robitussin with codeine (which the insurance would not pay for). I'm feeling a little better, and I actually slept 7 hours last night! She said it was probably bronchitis. My white cells were a little low, but she said they would probably be fine on Fri when I am scheduled for my chemo. They'll check it again, of course. I hope I can get it on Fri, and not have to wait until the next week (the 22nd). I am hosting both families, one Christmas Eve and one Christmas Day. I'll postpone it another week, until after Christmas. I'll take feeling lousy on my birthday (the 21st) versus Christmas.
Our youngest grandchild, Aiden, turned 5 yesterday. I can't believe how quickly time flies! We celebrated on Fri night with pizza, cake, and presents. We went on our last Mini run (a Toys for Tots run, we donated 108 toys), we started with 12 cars, and at the end we had 6. As we stopped for lunch, the snow started. We got about 4 inches. 3-7" is coming in on Tuesday.
Minne and Mel- I watch both "The walking dead" and "Game of Thrones". Love them both. It takes my mind off of everything!
I hope everyone had a good weekend!
Lynne
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Claudia~Hi there beautiful! I have been feeling really good having a good weekend with my DH. But he just had to go back down for the week again and now I wait again. I already miss him. How pathetic am I? I feel like a school girl!! Finally done decorating but I have ton of packages still out there so yuck. They better move it! I'll be thinking of you Tuesday Claudia. And of course ....
Gracie~ thinking of you my friend. Just like Claudia said hang on! I am still sending thoughts for good results. And I know how effin maddening and hard it is. Hang on to us. I adore you my friend! Much love ~M
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Lynne(Man)~Hi there darling. I am sorry you're still. Not over the awful cold, that thing sure did hang on to you!!! I really hope that by Christmas it's gone gone gone! I'm trying to always wash my hands, just in case and they feel like Sand paper sometimes. Sounds like you had better rest up for the parties you're hosting. You don't want to relapse with that bronchitis again.If you don't get enough rest. I am so known for that. I have so much still left to do. It is bugging me because I can only go so fast! I hope you're feeling better and are able to get done all you need to do as well. Glad to see you here!! Much love ~M~
I forgot to mention how thrilled I am about your grand son and that party. I can imagine the joy you felt!!!
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M- snow wont be gone here until spring....
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Keetmom~I know it's very snowy there. I don't think I could handle that, I am a huge wuss when it comes to cold temperatures! I don't do too well at all with lower than 50. You're a trooper. So are your children and DH.
I had such a nice weekend with my DH, he did my laundry and made me a pumpkin pie fresh and pumpkin cake with icing. He knows I love my sweets. He takes such good care of me. I wanted to say thank you to all of the wonderful care givers that help us fight the disease. Earlier in the Week my son and I decorated outside together, just the sound of his voice talking to me and joking around just warmed my heart. I think I'm finally getting excited to spend Christmas 🎄 day with my family. I seriously have like 20 presents that are needed to be delivered! I also have things to mail and things to buy Am that I have to mail. I have to get those things done this week because next week is the last full week before Christmas. My DH is a Christmas Eve baby. He has the worst birthday possible. The poor guy. Who wants birthday cake with a million types of cookies and cakes and chocolates. You name it. He doesn't usually want cookies. So I get cupcakes. Make it a smaller eating issue but we still celebrate in birthday wrapping paper, not Christmas present paper! I realize I have a lot to be thankful for this year. I want many more Christmas's for all of us. Good night. Hope everyone sleeps well! Chelle? Nan?? I'm hoping all is ok. Waving hello to Mae. Much love ~M~
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I did take something but I hate to rely on those, they are only supposed to be for helping me sleep. Luckily I was a day off and my appointment is tomorrow. My son going with me so I won’t be alone. And he even brought it up I didn’t ask him. So I think he knows that I’m scared. Just too many variables with Ibrance. There is always the worry of being so far away from my doctor and my blood count is going down and living here by myself and then I really worry about it causing diarrhea because I already have colitis so I have diarrhea on an ongoing basis and if anything makes it worse I won’t have a life at all. That plus the constant worry if I’m going to be around somebody that sick. Plus I’m just kind of pissed that this medicine that was supposed to last me 3 to 5 years only got me a year. I’m just not ready for any of this. I doubt I will sleep at all tonight
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Gracie ~Honey I am getting ready to start my #14 round of ibrance. I have never once had any diahrreah, not one time, I have also never gotten sick from low counts once either. Before I had all my surgeries and chemo and have been on this medicine , i would get upper respiratory infections and pneumonia every 6 to 8 weeks. I haven't even had a cold. Try not to freak out about ibrance if you can elimatine any stress, that should be one thing. Yes there is fatigue, but even that varies per person. I understand the not sleeping, i really do think this calls for a Valium night. You really don't want to string yourself out anymore than you already have I am sending strong thoughts. Take the Ativan Please. You need to shut down your mind and emotions for a time. You can't put this constant stress on yourself. You're on my mind, gentle hugs. Also, they monitor the blood levels. You don't need to worry about being alone on ibrance. I'm usually alone with two big dogs. Some people have no problems whatsoever with their levels. I know I haven't. I am going to believe you're also going to be one of those people!! Thinking of you! Much love ~M~
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Thanks Mel! Love you tons!!! I will try to rest tonight. I have no idea why this is causing me so much grief!
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I love the sound of your balcony Leapfrog. Seeing the flowers growing makes me happy. I have a little terrace, and love my plants. I even talk to them. Will have to check them this morning as wind is howling, and we are due rain, which is unusual for us (300days of sunshine a year). I believe it does help mood and lessens anxiety. Thinking of you Gracie, stay positive. I'm afraid to ask of prognosis, literally too scared. Just going to keep doing the treatment, the scans and try to keep up to enjoy the life I have to live. My feeling is I can either be miserable or stay positive for everyone around me. Sometimes I drop like a stone though. Tomorrow is treatment day, see how I feel after that. Happy Monday, play some Christmas music. Much love to all xx
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Mel, thanks. You're a breath of fresh air. I can't get the entire balcony into a photo but I'll see what I can do.
Gracie, sweetheart. Mel is right. Sometimes a Valium is necessary. Must admit I've resorted to an occasional one lately with my marriage situation, just to calm down that adrenaline, shaky feeling. You'll have your results soon; meanwhile try to imagine all of us hugging you as we send you love and prayers
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Gracie~Just letting you know that you and Claudia are on my mind. I know tomorrow is going to be a rough day. I hate what this disease does to good women. I am just waking up at its 11:30. I have to have twelve hours of sleep. It's annoying, without it I can't even move. Then ....it takes me like an hour to fully be able to move. The ibrance does cause fatigue. And sometimes my mouth is sore. Claudia has been on ibrance for 26 rounds. She's absolutely amazing. I believe her doctor lowered her doseage to 100 and she says, there is a huge difference. So ask a lot of questions. I have read many many articles that mention this medicine is out performing in patients with bone mets. So just buckle in and lean on us my darling friend! I adore you ~M
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Minnie~ I hope you had a restful sleep!! The howling winds didn't keep you awake! I always worry about the winds. Ever since hurricane Sandy! I get worried about winds. Sometimes they honestly sound like freight trains! I also talk to my plants, they never seem to answer, but most people don't answer me anyway lol especiallly my children. I guess that's just the way it is. I seem to either have a black thumb, or my plants just don't like me lol. I would love love to visit Spain. I would love to see some of my grandmas heritage. I don't know how much traveling I will be doing. But a woman can dream!! Much love ~M~
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I have been taking them. Probably shouldn’t have, but did. I realize that Adrenalin is horrible for us cancer patients , but having had a panic attack syndrome most of my adult life, I realize that there are times when my brain just does not act or react logically! It’s frustrating!!
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Leapfrog~Hi there sweetheart! I am so happy about your balcony, I can't stop smiling. Any snap shots would be great. I would Be honored to share the happiness that, that garden is bringing you. I can hear the smile in your postings. How many hours are between us? There are so many places I want to visit. So very many! Enjoy the beauty of your garden. You deserve it ! Big hugs ~M~
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Gracie honey~ it's not just your Brain sweetheart, it just happens when we are faced with something like this. I can't keep my appointments straight half the time. Our mind runs away with us, and with good reason! This is tough stuff here! My mind isn't what it used to be!! If I don't write them down i am toast. You are loved. I am always a phone call away. My dear friend hang in there. I am glad you took something. Stress is not good especially for cancer patients. I realize when I get like that I have to recover from feeling that way! I am in your pocket. Making noises just so you know you're not alone during those results. Is it today? Or tomorrow? ❤️❤️~M~
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Good Monday afternoon all,
I read all the posts while away this long weekend. Of course I can't keep all the information straight but I remember Gracie and Claudia have tests this Tuesday. I'm sending hugs that last at least 10 seconds to each of you. Claudia you're my 26 round hero. Gracie I'm happy you got that Ibrance year and now you'll see what's next. I really hope it did its job. I hate the thought too of taking sleeping pills but i took it twice since (Wednesday last week) Micmel suggested it and I fell into a great sleep and didn't feel hungover. Then I didn't take it for two nights one night I slept well the other Saturday night not at all. Finally yesterday I fell asleep early 8:00 and woke up by 10:00; by 1:00 a.m. I just took the pill. My doctor warned me to be careful bc I would want it all the time. But really DUDE how much time do I have again? I would like to sleep at night and be somewhat productive during the day.
Lynne I hope your cold is getting better. It sounds like the doctor prescribed you everything except chicken soup. I've been eating vitamins like candy trying to avoid germs, running holding my breath from coughs and sneezes lol. I know it doesn't work that way but I do hold my breath and move.
Keetmom your Wisconsin snow song is chilling. I hope you are staying warm.
My trip to Dallas was exciting and fun. It was my Ibrance off week so I had some energy and surprisingly pushed myself to try to participate in every event. Two of my DD are married to two brothers. My eldest DD lives across the street and is divorced from one of the brothers. My son was married and has two children and his ex wifes brother is also married to the sister of my two son in laws. Make sense. Anyway I went to see the cousins of my grandchildren and ex inlaws who we were friends with for years and love to death. MY DD was married for 17 years. Our ex inlaws we have been friends with for almost 40 years. We have two grandchildren in common both in college. I know it's confusing but we all actually love each other and had a great time with food and luncheons, dinner, etc. My other dear friends from Atlanta, Baltimore and Cincinnati joined us.
Dallas was freezing but we didn't catch any snow thankfully.
No one mentioned cancer and they all said that we were in their prayers. Nice not to have the cancer pity for an entire weekend.
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Today, Mel, at 3:00 pm.
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Tanya, sounds like you had a fun filled weekend! Yay! You look and sound very happy! There is nothing better than spending time with people you love! Your doctor's reaction is so funny. Mine says sleep is essential to healing. I have been taking Ambien for 12years. When I mention dependence to my dr's, they laugh and say I don't need to worry about that. I have also said I want to wait awhile before using the big guns for pain. They laugh at that too. Quality of life is their primary focus. Mo focuses on treating cancer.
Lynne(man), I hope you are feeling better! You need to rest, rest , rest. My MO keeps me supplied with 7 days of Levoquan because I can go from respiratory virus to bronchitis in the blink of an eye.
Keetmom, I love snow! I am also sure 5 months of it is too long! Micmel, you are waaay ahead of me on Christmas. Still haven't bought anything. We did put up tree and distribute a few decorations. We had a lovely fire, all day yesterday. Played Christmas music and made a new recipe for beef stew that was delicious. Also baked a Mocha Nut Cake that got thrown away. It was awful! I think my baking skills are gone.
Gracie, waiting for your results. We are here for you! Other Lynnes, where are you? Chelle, No1 and others, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
Claudia
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Tanya~Hello beautiful! Look at all of those happy special beauties. I really enjoy seeing all the smiles of support in friendship and years of history, that's exactly what life is all about. I am so glad that you were able to feel more energy on your week off of ibrance. Traveling is something I would love to do! You're all my heroes!
I have a palliative care doctor. I don't understand how any doctor of a stage four patient would tell them not to take something to be able to sleep. A body cannot heal without adequate sleep and rest. It's better to make sure you're rested. You may not want to take it everyday, that's certainly your choice. I take one Valium every night. It's a management program for wellness and quality of life. She has made this disease virtually painless for me. But I am not afraid at all to take something that is going to give me some peace of mind or relaxation, when my mind spins out of control very easily. I am on an anti depressant and it has helped me tremendously and has taken away my heat flashes! Palliative care doctors are the medicine people. That's all they do. Honestly if you don't have one, find one. I am stage four. What else is honestly worse, struggling to get through everyday with terrible anxiety and or pain, and the cancer isn't going to get any better if you don't take anything to alleviate the problems. Versus taking the medicine that helps those constant problems and calms you down and allows you to sleep and feel rested for another day of a battle ! I don't want to suffer. I want to sleep and love and live !And if that means taking medicine to do it. That's what I will do. I think stage four means you do whatever you have to function to your best of your abilities, nap, rest eat well, visit loved ones and live a little each day. Wake up and repeat for many many years. We can do it ! Much love ~M~
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Gracie~Thinking of you. We all are with you. Hugs my friend. 💕~M~
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Claudia~Hello lovely! Glad to see you! It sounds like a fire is just what I need. How romantic! I love roaring fires. So snuggling and comforting! I don't think I could handle five months of snow. I would loose my mind! Keetmom, does your entire family love snow!? Claudia. You're running out of time to shop my friend. Even for online! But if I remember correctly you're giving memories instead of gifts. Like trips and outings ? That is awesome in itself. My idea of an activity is sitting in a lazy boy chair by that fire you mentioned next to my sweet DH and reading a book! Sigh. Sounds wonderful. Good luck tomorrow....I Am thinking of you. And holding your hand. Love you friend. ~M~
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Ok, so it's official. Femera has quit working. I have five new areas, but the internal organs are still clear. One spot on the liver that he's pretty sure is a cyst, but he will keep an eye on that. So, I will be changing to Ibrance/Faslodex, starting next Monday. Will stay on Xgeva shots too. Am better...isn't it funny how that happens? It's the waiting. IT sucks! So I qualify for help on the Ibrance, so it will be paid for, (thank you God!). Because there is no way I could pay for it. Just wanted to let you know what's going on. Got through the day without taking anything for nerves, YEA!!!!! Thanks all of you for holding me up!!!!!!!!
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Mich actually we all hate snow...but this is where our family is...
Gracie glad you have a plan0 -
Gracie~I am very happy that there is no organ or tissue involvement ! Honestly. Thank you for letting us know, I've been checking. Ibrance is fatigue..... some mouth soreness. But you can do it. So glad you can breath now. Hugs and sending thoughts your way. Much love ~M~
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keetmom~that makes total sense. I have never even been there....I am so wanting to travel since we didn't get to rent that cabin in October. I just need to find some energy laying around. Hugs to the girls. ! ~M~
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Wonderful news, Gracie! No organs and a plan! Yay!
Hugs and prayers,
Claudia
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Wonderful news, Gracie! No organs and a plan! Yay!
Hugs and prayers,
Claudia
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Yay Gracie, so happy you get some relief and who knows, maybe ibrance will be the one for the next few years.
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