Surgery August 2018
Comments
-
Alright Ladies,
Can we say... 540 cc's in left and 600 in right! Y'all make me feel like I'm getting my reconstruction done in anticipation of a new career that entails scant clothing and a pole! WHAT!, Just to give you an idea my my expanders were filled to 300cc's at the time of my BXm. There was a lot of irritation but to me in seems to be less as they are filled and I get over the 1st couple of days stretching after each fill. I think the thing that bothers me the most is the soreness and nerve irritation when I do too much. Am I the only one out there like this?
0 -
Oh Nooooooo, NCGirl!
You are the normal one, not me! lol
I was overly "blessed" and had already had a breast reduction. However, I still always preferred smaller breasts. Now that I have a legit choice, I'm definitely staying smaller!
The fill thing, ... that's another matter entirely. I'm not sure what's going on with me. I have to assume that my tiny little pectorals (I've never had much upper body strength) are tight, tight, tight. And not in a good way. It took me over 5 days to recover from my 25cc fill. #eyeroll THAT is ridiculous.
Our little group is getting quieter and quieter. I hope that means everyone is doing well and living their lives.
0 -
NCGIRL
My TE was filled to 610cc and my exchange surgery was last week. My implant is an Allergen silicone gummy implant 600cc. It conforms so much better to my chest wall which doesn’t make it look lanything like the TE did. Feels very natural and after a few months my PE says it will look even better😊.
0 -
Hello Fellow Troopers,
I am hoping to get my oncotype score today. They were supposed to have it yesterday, but my phone never rang. I hope to find out today, or I will be giving them a call this afternoon.
Crawfish...I have a 2:30 fill today. I am scared. I am going to muscle relax and pain pill beforehand. I think this may be my last fill. I too am uncomfortable and my skin is so tight and sensitive, well the parts that are not numb, I should say. I did not have ice cream, but my sister made me chocolate chip zucchini cake with fresh whipped cream. I have nine sisters and three brothers. My sister, Diane, has always been very special to me.
I will post again once I get my score. The hospital bills have been rolling in like a printing press. I don't really even look at them. My "fusband", we are not married but have been together for almost 19 years, has been keeping track of all my bills and he is going to handle them. I told him to pay $50 a month.
I have been talking with my mentor quite a bit from Imerman Angels. She is a life saver. I posted the website earlier. You all should check it out. It is like having a best friend that went through the same thing and knows the ins and outs of this terrible curse we have all been given.
If I do not need chemo, I am back at work next week. It scares the hell out of me. Not so much seeing my students and teaching, but seeing all of my coworkers and having these boulders under my shirt. I am not sure that I am emotionally ready to go back. I guess I will wait and see what the MO says, if she ever f'ing calls.
I have to wean myself off Prozac before I can begin the Tamoxifen. I am going to look into medical marijuana instead of going on another antidepressant. I always wanted to be a hippy!
Hang in there everyone. I hope my foobs do not explode during my fill. I have been saving some pain pills for this weekly event. I will update everyone if I hear anything.
WW
0 -
Crawfish & /Gramto4, good to know that my sizes does not predestine me to a new career LOL!
Catfish, I did not realize your expanders were under the pec's, mine are above, that would certainly explain why you are experiencing more difficulty than I am. I am sorry! I think It would definitely take smaller fills over a longer period of time. Hang in there!
Gramto4, congrats on your exchange surgery. I really look forward to that next step. I think my doc is planning some time in December. So glad to hear they feel very natural, I know that has to be a relief after the hard bothersome TE! Did you or will you have fat graphs to fill in places? wondering what that will be like?!
I am on a 10 day hiatus from fills, so that is a nice break. Then I have 2 or three left. YAY. Today I was feeling a little bit sorry for myself and gave my self a pep talk put my tennis shoes and took a 25 min. leisurely walk around the neighborhood. Better now!
I agree with you Catfish, it has slowed down in here, probably/hopefully due to the fact that people are starting to feel more like themselves and are getting out and doing a few things.
Have a great Day!
0 -
WW, Saying a prayer that you have a low Oncotype score !!!! BTW you only see them as boulders! I agree that they do feel like them to me! One thing that has help me with feel/ and appearance when I have my compression bra on to go out in public is.....don't laugh!....I took the pads out of one of my daughters sports bra and put them in my compression bra. It does give a softer appearance and offers a little more comfort. Hey I will do anything to alleviate some of the irritation
Hang in there!
0 -
Hey ladies, I saw the radiation oncologist yesterday and I don't need any radiation therapy the surgery did the trick. And I start back to work on Friday. I will have to hit the ground running because we are short on Instructors. I hope I can keep up and not overdo it. My foobs are healing well, my abs are still very sore though. I hope all of you are doing well as we continue our journey on our path to recovery.
0 -
ELIJAHGIRL...Great news! Celebrate!
0 -
great news, Elijahgirl! Really really great.
NCgirl, that’s a good idea about the pads. My issue is that my PS placed my expanders so high that they’re only about an inch below my collarbone. That may be part of why my fills are so difficult. But anyway, I look like I got a little overzealous with the bra straps. 😂
Keeping you in my thoughts, WW!
0 -
Good to hear everyone's news. Is there anybody else in the group who did not get reconstruction, or am I the only one? I am still waiting for the last of the steri strips to come off my incisions; they are stubborn little critters!
I am doing well, nearly back to normal range of motion now. Started Letrozole (aka Femara) three weeks ago and so far so good - no side effects to speak of. Thinking of taking aquasize classes but need to figure out a swimsuit first... So far I have been just going flat and surprisingly have not been too self conscious.
Sending healing vibes to all... xx
0 -
Crawfish...we must have the same doctor, mine are right under my collarbone too. I have never seen muscles spasm like this before. It's like when I try to lay down at night I have a party going on under my man pecs.
NCGirl1...I threw out all of my bras two weeks ago. My PS told me that I "never have to wear a bra again". So I am holding him to it. At least he is really cute so I have eye candy during my injection. I wear a button down shirt and skip the gown.
Gramto4....Glad you are feeling more normal.
Elijahgirl...getting closer to wearing no bra for you too. Rejoice!
0 -
akmom - I'm with you, I also didn't get reconstruction. I'm half flat, but my other side is a small B (probably more like a large A after kids). I haven't bothered to get a foob yet so have just been going as is... I was a bit self-conscious at first, but have found people are generally so unobservant I don't think anyone notices but me. And now that I'm into chemo land I figure I have bigger fish to fry so have stopped worrying about it. I think of it as my pirate boob look. Glad you have not been too self-conscious and that you're managing Letrozole with no SEs!
0 -
Ok ladies I have a question the perimeter of my foobs and my chest wall feels like they are on fire it feels like all my nerve endings are on fire. Has anyone had the same experience? Especially those of you who had reconstruction.
0 -
Hi Elijahgirl,
Yes I do experience that feeling around the perimeter of my foobs. It occurs mostly when I have been doing too much with my arms. I am currently 7 weeks post bxm and TE's. When the nerves start firing off and I am sore, I will usually take a muscle relaxer along with 2 Tylenol. If it is really bad and I am trying to get some sleep I might take 1/2 of a pain pill too. I think we are at the point in our recovery that we feel like we can do more than we should and the nerves are starting to wake up too and they are not very happy with what we are doing. Some times while waiting for the meds to ease thing off I will hug a pillow and the gentle pressure helps as well. Hope some of this helps.
0 -
beeline, love the "pirate boob", too funny
0 -
Drum roll.......
My oncotype score was a 2. I have never been so excited to get a low score on something. I will not need chemo. God is good!
On another note, I think that my fill yesterday has been the most painful one yet. I have terrible foob and back pain. It is almost unbearable. I took lots of meds last night and no such luck on getting any sleep. I got another 60 ccs, which brings me to 180 and I can barely take a deep breath without being in pain. I want them out. The pain pills don't help too much. I know this too shall pass, but the pain and tightness makes me want to crawl in a hole somewhere and hide until Monday.
I have another fill scheduled for next week, but if I am back at work, I cannot go through this again. I was feeling so excited about my score the pain did not kick in until later in the afternoon. I am not sure what to do but hopefully it will get better with time. UGH! Ouch. Calgon, take me away.
0 -
WonderWoman75, congratulations on your low oncotype score but I'm sorry you're in so much pain and I pray it eases up soon.
0 -
WonderWoman what a great news!! That’s such a relief, I’m so happy for you! I’m glad everyone is doing well.
I have very rare discomfort in my underarm that goes away on its own. My incision just doesn’t want to close and getting dangerously close to the expander. I was told today that they need to admit me to take me to OR and sow back my incision again. They deflated my expanders completely and now I’m waiting for a room to open. So I’m starting from scratch again. But that’s okay, I just want this incision to heal so they don’t have to take out the expander. I’ll keep you ladies posted. Keep up the good fight!
0 -
Kiso20...wishing you the best of luck. What a bummer that you got deflated. However, I am regretting these TEs more and more each day.
I start my Tamoxifen tomorrow. My doctor told me that I will have to take it for 10 years??? Is this the same as everyone else? I thought it was only 5 years.
I have decided to cancel my next fill. I go back to work on Tuesday and I cannot work and not be able to breathe. Take care all...
SadlyNew...where are you?
0 -
hey! I’m here! Been posting a lot in the October chemo group. We are all starting the craziness here soon (otherwise known as ACT). Lol.
Wonderwoman - that score is ridiculously awesome. I bet your mind was going in all different directions. How wonderful you get to skip the craziness! I’m so so happy for you :-)
I do need to check back more in this group. Y’all are awesomely strong. And we all kicked butt in August!
0 -
Wow, I almost feel guilty posting on this thread now. I had such an easy time compared to all of you. Drains were pulled about two weeks post BMX. At my two week follow up, my PS ordered physical therapy for me because I couldn't lift my right arm all the way. PT was extremely effective for me; I have full range of motion back and there's only a few positions/exercises that makes my muscles feel like they're pulling. I came back to work on Wednesday but honestly I probably could have come back two weeks earlier. I've had only mild pain throughout this whole ordeal. Nothing that couldn't be handled with tylenol or advil. I still have all 30 oxycodones I started with.
Unfortunately my implants are kind of lopsided; the right one is round and full and centered on the nipple while the left one is kind of misshapen and the nipple points outward and it just looks smaller than the right. I will be starting rads in the next few weeks and after that I will go back to my PS for a revision (I want to see if the right one shrinks at all before I ask for an exchange on the left side). I posted pictures of my recon on the pictures forum, if anyone is aware of that and has access I post there under the same screen name. My husband keeps telling me they look fine and not to mess with it anymore but dammit I hate the lopsided one, that was my prophylactic side too. I'm hoping once the stitches dissolve it shifts and looks more normal.
I hope my nipple survives radiation. It is completely flat now, looks almost like a nipple tattoo instead of a real nipple.
crawfish - thanks for posting your PT exercises!
If any of you are in Houston, it looks like I will be heading there for rads. Let me know if you want to meet up!
0 -
Hapa, don't feel guilty consider it a blessing from above minus the lopsidedness, if you are ever in San Antonio let's get together and you're always welcome here.
Wonder Woman, Gratz on your score and best wishes starting back to work, I also have start back as well gotta love the military on the positive side I get to retire in February.
Kiso, wishing you a speedy and smooth recovery I had to go back in the hospital 3 weeks ago for the same thing and a graft.
NCGirl1, glad to know I am not unique lol, it is hard to explain what it is like to my family I hope it doesn't last too long because I have been trying to lay off the pain meds.
Keep me in y'alls prayers I have been grieving my boobs, and I hate my scars and foobs right now This is actually the first time it has hit me that the old me is gone. I think it is because I saw a old guy friend last week and began wondering if anyone could ever love the new me. I know that this to shall pass but I know you ladies are the ones who will understand
0 -
ElijahGirl...I know it is hard. I still take pictures to look at my foobs because it is too hard for me to look in the mirror. My fusband doesn't seem to mind and he probably wants to have sex eventually, but I cannot even imagine being intimate right now. I want to, but then I think that I look so different and put back together and my foobs are so hard and tender to the touch. Poor guy.
I keep thinking that it will look better soon, even though my final surgery seems to be so far away. When I see my scars, I try to think to myself, "Man, I have been through a war and I survived." It is a difficult thing to explain to others. Everyone sees my scars and says they look so good and I am healing so fast, yet not many people think about my scars that I have inside. This whole surgery, recovery and treatment thing has been more than a war. It is an invasion. The emotional scars of mine are not looking so good and not healing as fast. I dread going back to work because everyone at work will be looking at me. They won't see the mental suffering that I have going on inside my head.
My doctor put me on an antidepressant. He asked me if I was ready emotionally and I told him, "No, but I have to go back sooner or later." He would have extended my leave, but it would have been unpaid. I keep telling myself to take one day at a time. It is hard to deal with emotions when we are physically recovering from our surgery and the pain from all of this.
I thought about going to counseling, but I have my counseling degree, so I am really fussy about who I feel I can talk to. I tried a couple of years ago and I did not feel that my counselor was even listening to me. Seriously, you ladies, have been my best outlet. Reading everyone's posts and feeling the genuine support from all of you ladies has been a blessing. Hang in there ladies. We still have a long road ahead of us. One day at a time has been saving me from self destruction. Keep on fighting. Our battle may never be over, but we are survivors!
0 -
Hapa, did your PS explain why she used two different sizes of implants? I think you look great, but I completely understand how it could bother you.
0 -
hapa posted above "I posted pictures of my recon on the pictures forum".
Because I have no idea how to find it, could someone please paste a link to that forum here, or tell me where to find it?
0 -
So this past Tuesday was my first day back to work and it was rough I was working in the IV lab all day. By Friday I convinced them to take me off podium so I taught my last lecture. Monday I will be moving to the Admin department and a desk job. This will allow me to make all my appointments and prepare for my upcoming retirement hopefully these next few months will be better
0 -
Glad you will be in a more suitable place for your last few months at work, Elijahgirl. Wishing you all the best as you get ready for retirement.
0 -
WW Here,
I wimped out on my fill today. I have been back at work and I couldn't bring myself to drive there for the pain. I rescheduled my hopefully last fill, for this Monday. It will bring me up to 300 CCs, I think.
How are all my ladies?? Work has worn me out, but I caffeinated myself pretty good today after my 4 hour nap after work yesterday. hope everyone is doing well...
XOXO
0 -
Hi All-
Haven’t posted here in ages bc chemo has kept me busy for the last 6 weeks but I’ve been following the thread. Got a 30cc fill today to bring me to 600ccs. Probably only a couple more to go. I have pre-pec expanders which I imagine are much less painful than sub-pec bc the fills don’t bother me at all! I wish they were more rounded out-I know they are only temporary but I will likely have them another year. Just typing that is a bummer-I can’t wait until I can sleep normally again!!!! Still debating DIEP vs implants. I guess how my skin handles radiation will help determine that!
0 -
WW
I can totally sympathize with you as far as feeling worn out I am still extremely sore around my abdomen so moving is slow. I started back to work last week and having to get up at 5:00 am makes for a long day and it doesn’t help to find out that I am anemic too! I can’t speak for the fills but the nerve endings around my foobs are extremely sensitive. I hope you and pray it goes easy for you on Monday. My surgical oncologist still wants me to see the medical oncologist I hope that this doesn’t mean I need to go on anymore medications I take enough as it is lol
0
