Starting Chemo October 2018
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Sisterstrong-Thank you so much for your supportive words, have a chemo training session tomorrow along with the cardiologist, scared about starting chemo on Friday but ready to start this fight. Bone scan on Tuesday or Wednesday, these tests never end but I guess it’s best to fully check out everything
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Newfromny, hang in there! You got this!
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Happy Sunday Ladies! I’m on day 5 after first infusion of TCHP. Thus far the SE have been totally doable. Gotta say I’m very gun shy for SE, but as long as keep drinking water, and eat every couple hours I seem to be okay. I do have the acne like rash, but whatever- I’ll take that.
Enjoy your evening everyone!
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not giving up - happy happy birthday!!! Sounds like things are progressing ok after #2. I am about a week behind you and hope for the same. Just think, on your next birthday, you will be thinking back to this time and how far you have come. Kudos on shaving. I am day 13 now and no shedding yet. I really want to see this medicine work. Then it’s off with the hair!
Fritz - happy birthday to you too! Same thoughts as not giving up. Next year, you will have such a memory of this birthday and will be able to look back at all you’ve accomplished. Good luck tomorrow with #2 and also with the wig fitting. I am confident you will rock both of them. :-)
Casey - how was your weekend post #2? Hope all is well your way.
JS - hello! At first it didn’t. Because I drank so much around infusion time. But now I associate it with infusions. So it makes me nauseous. Trying hard to drink it.
Patrice - that sounds like a good idea re yoga. (thanks too, Fritz). Are you a beginner? Because I will sure be one. Is it tough to learn? Good for you for jumping into it! You are incredibly motivated!
I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. Let’s make this week a good one
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Just got tapped for round 2. I told the nurse that hooked up my port that when they do it I feel like a keg being tapped. Though this isn’t nearly as fun as my college years!
Hope everyone is having a good day
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Starting my first chemo tomorrow. I am doing Tai Chi on the days I don't feel up to walking. You all make me feel so optimistic. I know it won't be easy, but thanks to all of you, I'm going to make it through this.
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Ugh! I’m not liking that my SEs hit me only a few hours after treatment. Came home and was able to get my son off the bus and eat dinner, and then I was so nauseous I had to go up to bed. I was given some anti-nausea pills to take this time, but I’m not sure they’re doing much. Eating here and there with as much water as I can tolerate because I know that helps. Just hoping I don’t wake up with a rapid heartbeat like I did after round 1.
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fritz - ugh. I’m sorry they are sneaking up on you. That’s how it was with my first AC. My days 1-3 were the worst. I hope the anti nausea meds start kicking it for you. Get some rest and drink lots of water. Btw, loved the keg analogy!
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Hi everyone,
Yesterday was my first infusion of taxol/herceptin. It lasted about an hour longer than it should have because I had my first breakdown since my diagnosis in mid July. The moment I saw the needle about to enter my arm (I do not have a port) I freaked out. Worst panic attack I had in a long while. I felt like a little kid throwing a tantrum. I was saying, “ I can’t do this, I don’t want to do this. Mom help me” it was awful. When I finally calmed myself down and we got started the extremely high dose of Benadryl in my premeds relaxed me completely. I can already feel slight changes in my body as I type this at 2 am my time. I’m sweating slightly, my skin feels like it isn’t drying out. My eyes feel a little dry. And my tongue and mouth feel different. Not drunk but different. Can’t explain. I am staying extremely hydrated. I heard yogurt and bananas are goodness post chemo foods so I had those. Also the premiere protein shakes were suggested to me. They gave me Pepcid as one of my premeds and I came home and took a nexium so no heartburn or indegestion here! Thank goodness. I hope everyone is well! Have a great week week
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Annie: good luck today! My cancer resource center offers Tai Chi. I might have to try it!
Nothappy: so sorry you had a panic attack before your infusion, but it’s totally warranted! This is scary stuff. But you powered through! Good for you! My mouth starts to feel funny almost immediately and that lasted for me about a week the first time. Hope it’s not any longer this round because it makes eating difficult, and they want me to gain like 10-20lbs. Ha! Easier said than done when your tounge feels like what I’d imagine it’d feel like to have the tounge of a cat! I’m glad they sent you home with meds to make you feel as comfortable as possible! One treatments down!
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so today is day 14. AC #2 tomorrow. And the shedding has arrived. Wow, you all were so right. I thought I would be fine but I'm so shattered today. Hubs going to shave it tonight. I think it's finally getting real. Gotta get my game face on and ammo up for battle. That's how I'm going to face it. Thank you ladies for all the amazing support. If I wasn't motivated then, I sure am now! On the bright side, the medicine must be doing something! Lol.
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Sadlynew- I know that the hair loss is hard. It took me a day to be ok with it. (Btw I am currently sitting on my couch bald head exposed) Don't look at it as a sign of sickness, look at it as a badge of strength. You earned it by doing chemo. Wear it proudly.
I am waiting for my daughter to come home (college class was cancelled this morning) so we can try to do yoga this morning. Day 6 and I'm tired. I over did it this weekend and paid for it yesterday. Lesson learned.
Hope everyone is feeling good! Rest, exercise, eat healthy, and keep hydrated. We got this!
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Today is day 12 since my first treatment. No hair loss or shedding yet. My husband thinks I wont lose it, but I am not so optimistic! I am feeling so much better than I did the first 5-6 days....Hope everyone else is doing well!
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Hello all,
Although I was diagnosed in 8/1, this is my first post. I managed through my lumpectomy and recovery in pretty much complete denial. Trip to MO yesterday with news that I would be starting AC next week (port and echo later this week) pretty much destroyed any ability to deny any longer.
Funny - Before I was diagnosed, I thought the hair loss was the worst part of chemo. A few hours on the internet and you find out lots more awful SEs of chemo (although I am TOTALLY freaked out about losing my hair). UGH. And I totally relate to the frustration of not knowing how I will feel - I need to plan!!!
I am really trying to stay positive, but amfeeling pretty down today. It did help to read the posts from all of the awesome women who are going through this together.
Talk to you all soon
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Fritz - My SE hit me a few hours after my first treatment too. I even had anti-nausea IV meds before they started the chemo that are supposed to stay in your system for 5 days. Days 1-4 were really difficult, even my vision was blurry. By day 5 and 6 the SEs had subsided dramatically and day 7, almost gone completely, which is not something I expected. I hope round two brings relief after a few days too, although I am not looking forward to the next treatment!
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Hello warriors!
Hope all who were poisoned (or who got their "kegs tapped" whichever you prefer) are holding up well. Casey, Annie? You ladies doing OK? Casey is 1/2 way done!!!
JS - I guess we are instructed to drink SO much water that after a while, it just gets harder and harder to stomach. I try to switch up with Gatorade or Sobe water, or something similar, or put a cucumber or lime in my water just to get enough hydration. A smoothie really helps too, and it counts, because it's liquid.
NotHappy, I'm so sorry you had a bad first time, but it is totally understandable. Up until they actually put the IV in, this whole chemo thing is kinda hypothetical, but in the treatment room, shit gets real. And that is legitimately terrifying. You are so brave to be able to get it together and go on anyway. You got this, first one under your belt, now you know what to expect and how to fight back. Keep fighting.
Fritz, I'm so sorry the se's kicked your butt this early. Sounds like you have done your best to stay on top of it, and the good news is you are almost out of the woods. One more down, my friend. One more in the rear-view. You rock! How did that wig styling go?
To all my brave sisters who shaved their heads, I am in awe of your courage. I am not ready. I will repeat my sentiments from the day I got my chemo cut, it's bullshit and I hate it. Is it because we begin to actually LOOK sick, and there's no way to really hide that when we see ourselves? Ah well, whatever the psychology is, it sucks. And if one more person says "it will grow back..." Will it grow back tomorrow? Or by the weekend? Then STFU please and thank you. Grrrrrrrrr.
Rabbit - this is our week, I know you are as ready as I am, and you are one up on me. Let's do this nonsense and get on with our lives.
Take good care of yourselves, this fight is no joke, but you all go on with such courage and wit, you inspire me daily. We joined a group "starting chemo in October" and October is almost done. See how amazing you all are? Read over all your old posts and find that each and every one of you is a legitimate bad ass. We've all stumbled, but without exception, we have all gotten up and kept on going. Bad Asses, one and all. Rock on with your bad selves.
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Starting 12 weeks of TC Monday October 29th. Praying to be strong enough to handle all the comes my way. Peace to all of you!
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hi everyone! I’m arming up for AC #2 this morning. So ready to be half done! Hoping the SE stay management although im not so sure. Going to be positive though! Also going to meet with the MO before to see maybe if she can tone down those steroids. Last time I was ready to crawl out of my skin.
Shaved the head last night. SO glad that was over. Just kept thinking, I’m arming up for battle. I feel like that is a milestone in this battle. I was dreading it for awhile and just thankful I’ve got that under my belt. Felt like we should all get a medal for that!
Hope everyone is doing well. For those having the beast this week, sending good vibes and well wishes. Let’s all keep going. We can do this and ARE doing this!
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Patrice- when you say " And if one more person says "it will grow back..." Will it grow back tomorrow? Or by the weekend? Then STFU please and thank you. Grrrrrrrrr." THANK YOU. People with hair should not be able to say that! And it doesn't make me feel any better when they do. I know it will freaking grow back, I've had hair my entire life and I know that. I haven't shaved/lost mine yet (day 13 for me), but I did cut off nearly a foot and I feel naked!
It's not so much the loss of the hair as what it represents and people don't understand that.
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each day and Patrice - I could not agree with you more!
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Gearing up for battle
i like that. Im still new to the group so seeing all your posts and feeling your strength is amazing. You ladies are amazing. This isn’t something people can understand unless they have been through it. You can’t explain it. Personally I’m tired of hearing well at least you got a “free boob job” wait 1. I didn’t want a boob job, I liked my boobs. 2. None of this is “free” 3. Having cancer isn’t enough...killing it comes with a LONG list of side effects. If anyone tells me, “it’s just hair, it will grow back” I might scream. I genuinely believe people mean well, they just don’t know what to do or say and end up saying the wrong thing. Oh well. Thank you all for your strength.0 -
hello all! Eve before AC#3 for me. Having kinda a rough day. I haven’t shared this yet but I’ve been going through chemo away from home. My houses roof failed before chemo was to start and I had to relocate to my mother in laws and establish a temporary oncologist to start treatment while our home is being fixed. I’ve had to do this 2 and half hrs away from home, my husband, my church, everything. Today it really hit me. The house will be ready after I recover from my 4th AC about 4 weeks away. The homesickness is unbearable but I have no alternatives until the house is fixed. My days drag on so slow, 4 weeks sounds so far away. While I’m happy I’ll be 3/4 of the way through AC chemo and I know I can get through the chemo part, the emotional part is so hard, will be asking for anxiety meds tomorrow because all my previous methods of coping are no longer working. I feel bad for bitching and moaning while all u ladies are struggling with side effects, tho l will be rejoining the club tomorrow. My dear husband has been working so hard to get things ready for My return I feel like a fool falling apart in the final stretch, good things await but I can’t see the forest through the trees, I miss him and I miss home.
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oh Rad, I can’t imagine doing this away from home!! Huge hugs to you! Complain away
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Oh, Rabbit, my favorite guinea pig. I am so sorry. I can't even imagine how much harder this is given all you are dealing with. It's just not fair. At all.
I have no idea how you've managed to keep it together this long, you are amazing. Amazing.
4 weeks rabbit. You can do this. It's gonna suck, but each day is one day closer to done . Let yourself grieve and fall apart if need be. Just don't forget to get up and keep going, one day at a time. We will be here for you.
Good luck tomorrow, I will be thinking of you, sending strength your way. ❤❤❤
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T
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oh my, Rad. What a tough experience. Being away from your comfort place can definitely take its toll. Your sweet home will never know the likes of AC but maybe that will help you not associate it with that? Silver linings maybe. I try hard to find them in their crazy journey we are all on. I’m so glad you have this blog to come to We are all here for you Vent sway :-)
Finished AC#2 today. Half done. They cut the decadron in 1/2. The jitters were driving me crazy. It’s been ok so far. Waiting for the SEs to come on. Hoping they are minimal or maybe even non existent Went for a walk (which so many of you suggested) It helped SO much more than I thought.
Good luck to everyone else having treatment this week. Sending good vibes :-)
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Good Morning all - Hope all who were treated this week are managing to keep se's at bay. Rabbit and I will be poisoned today, then i will be a member of the 1/2 way club with Casey and April and who else?
My hair is falling out. Started in the shower yesterday on my "nether regions". That wasn't horrifying. The amount of hair on my pillow and PJ's this morning is. I am afraid to touch my scalp. I can imagine how much will come out in the shower this morning. Then I get to go to work. My desk is near the coffee pot, so everyone in the office will get a great view of whatever I am left with. So, there's that to look forward to. Yeah.
Don't think I will get thru this weekend without shaving it all off. Not ready at all.
Take care of yourselves my fellow fighters, hydrate, eat, rest... you know how it's done. Good vibes to all.
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morning of my 3rd AC which is set to commence at 1pm today. Thank you ladies for the support. I think things really got hard when even my buzzed hair bits fell out, I’m 95 percent bald now. I look like a newborn bird trying to grow feathers it’s ridiculous. I’m sure the last bits will fall out this round. My hair started coming out the same way as u Patrice, started below and then the top of the head went. I want to second the emotion as it were about the “it will grow back” comment. Every time I hear that said to me I feel the urge to go super saiyan grow in my belly. I didn’t losing it would be as hard as it was but I do know I haven’t completely lost it forever, I’m trying to convince myself it went on vacation and it will come back better than ever.
I’m not sure how I’ll muster up the strength to go another 4 weeks. Not only am I struggling with homesickness but boredom. I’m so used to my routine at home and now it’s all gone. Also getting hints of slight resentful ness from my MIL even tho I’ve been trying so hard to be a good houseguest and not let my chemo disrupt her life too much. I know life will be so much easier for me at home and in turn I feel I’m becoming resentful too. This BC bull crap is no joke it can mess with ur life in so many ways but to have the normal woes of life mess with your life too (House damage) it feels like a double whammy.
Hope everyone is well and side effects are being kind. Congrats on hitting the halfway point sadlynew!! Casey should be hitting halfway point too!Patrice, you and I hit the half way point and the 3/4 point together today. Almost there!
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about ready to leave soon to be “poison”ed I thought to myself just now how pathetic am I looking forward to chemo because it will give me something to do for 4 hrs. Lol. AC #3 about to be done
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Right behind you, Rabbit!
Leaving now for poison...
Let's get this done!
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