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All TopicsForum: Young With Breast Cancer → Topic: Ladies in their 30s

Topic: Ladies in their 30s

Forum: Young With Breast Cancer —

Connect with those under 40 who have been diagnosed.

Posted on: Aug 23, 2010 06:10AM - edited Mar 8, 2016 09:08AM by Lady_Madonna

Lady_Madonna wrote:

Hi sisters,

Just wanted to find out how many of us are in our 30s.

Do you have husbands and families? I found that aspect particularly hard while I was doing my chemo- keeping up with the needs of everybody else while I was doing my treatments.

Now I'm in the radiation portion and school will be starting in about 10 days... yay!

Say hello if you have a moment!

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Feb 20, 2018 12:09AM rhp268 wrote:

So I also happen to be a psychologist. If I may, the fact that you’re both afraid to talk about it is where the conversation should probably begin. It might help to make it feel safer for both of you.

You might also benefit from connecting with other family members and partners who are struggling with similar concerns.

As for the contacts issue, it sounds important to you so it’s worth discussing with her. It might be a great pathway to establishing even more trust in your intentions to support her.

Don’t get lost in the support that both of you provide to others. You’re both especially equipped to deal with issues like this. It’s just harder when the attention needs to be on your own life. Now is the time to take that equipment and use it to nourish your own relationship and your own well being.

Dx 5/7/2015, LCIS/IDC, Right, 2cm, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Chemotherapy 5/29/2015 AC + T (Taxol) Surgery 11/11/2015 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant, Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant, Tissue expander placement Targeted Therapy Perjeta (pertuzumab)
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Feb 20, 2018 01:42AM lookingforanwers wrote:

Hi ToughCookie101,

Thanks for understanding. It's difficult for both of us. I still can't understand how strong women like yourselves deal with these news and change in life. My respects go to all of you. I think she forces herself to go to work in order to not sit at home and think of everything coming. Plus she likes working with the kids. It is difficult to come home and talk about these very real issues, but i think we're both drained in different ways. We can stay on touch and watc TV and know what each one is thinking without having to say a word. I as her sometimes, "are you ok, how are you feeling" just to know, and i get this sort of angry response of yeah i'm fine, which I get because i hate being asked those questions.

isn't it weird how your friend and us as well can go to work, take on other people's problems, forget our own and try to help them? Human nature i guess. I know she's a fighter as am i , we're both realistic about this and will do whatever necessary.

I do have a question. I don't know if you have gone through surgery yet or if you are, but if you did or are going to, would you want your fiance to be present? not to ask his/her opinion, but just to be there? I offered and would like to go with her like i have been at every chemo appointment, but this would be different.

Anyway, thank you for taking time from your day to answer some stranger regarding his issues with this.

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Feb 20, 2018 03:37PM Cpeachymom wrote:

Looking- my husband came to the hospital the day of my surgery, and I had arranged for my best friend to come after work to keep HIM company so he wasn’t going crazy waiting. I was mostly out of it that whole day because of the anesthesia, so I was glad they had each other to talk to. I imagine she would want the company, especially pre-op when you’re just stuck there waiting on a gurney...but I’m not her. After, I just wanted to sleep

39 at Dx. Fate whispers to the warrior, 'You can not withstand the storm.' The warrior whispers back, 'I am the storm.' Dx 6/21/2017, IDC, Right, 4cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/5/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Hormonal Therapy 9/11/2017 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy 9/18/2017 Lymph nodes, Chest wall
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Mar 3, 2018 12:15AM punches0524 wrote:

Hello. I was diagnosed late last year. I am 33. I have two boys that will be 10 and 12 in a couple months. Thankfully my husband and family have been so incredibly supportive.

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Mar 12, 2018 08:07PM Olesya wrote:

Hello everyone.

I am a 34 mom to a 2.y.o. had 3/4 chemo rounds. Last one was on Mar. 6..2018

Tripple positive IDC. Diagnosed on Nov.28,2017 ( feels like an eternity ago...)

Finally found thus forum,and I have been on this website since January 2018 when I started my chemo..

Smile-life is beautiful!:) Dx 11/28/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Surgery 12/12/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel, Underarm/Axillary Targeted Therapy 1/21/2018 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 1/22/2018 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Hormonal Therapy Liquid tamoxifen (Soltamox) Radiation Therapy 3DCRT: Breast
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Mar 12, 2018 08:51PM CrystalMarieG31 wrote:

Hello, I too was just recently diagnosed in December at the age of 31 with Triple Negative Breast Cancer, Stage II, Grade 3. I am almost through chemo, finished AC and now completing the Taxol treatment. AC was easy for me with no real side effects other than fatigue and headaches. After my first Taxol treatment I was having bad neuropathy in my feet and legs a few days after, that was at dense dose scheduled every 2 weeks. My oncologist decided it would be best to change my treatment plan to the low dose weekly instead due to that side effect I had. I had mixed feelings about this at first, since with the DD plan I would be done 4/8 but now I won't be dont until 5/11 but hopefully in the long run it was the best decision, I would rather not rush the treatment and have less side effects and less risk for the neuropathy since the days I did have it it was awful. After chemo I then move on to decision on surgery, luckily the tumor is responding well and has decreased in size by over 50% and have another MRI soon to see the progress again. For me the options will be mastectomy or possibility lumpectomy with radiation, I am struggling with the idea of making that decision. Any helpful hints out there with deciding?? I'm sure there are so many things that contribute but looking for other younger women experiences with both.

thanks :)

Dx 12/14/2017, IDC, Right, Stage IIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 12/28/2017 AC + T (Taxol)
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Mar 12, 2018 09:07PM Cpeachymom wrote:

crystal- Sounds like you made a good choice for your chemo. (Well, there are no GOOD choices, they’re all sucky choices we have to make!) As far as deciding between lumpectomy and mastectomy, there’s no guarantee that you won’t need radiation after mastectomy. With lumpectomy it’s standard, but I ended up node positive with LVI, so I had to get rads after my mastectomy.

39 at Dx. Fate whispers to the warrior, 'You can not withstand the storm.' The warrior whispers back, 'I am the storm.' Dx 6/21/2017, IDC, Right, 4cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/5/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Hormonal Therapy 9/11/2017 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy 9/18/2017 Lymph nodes, Chest wall
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Mar 13, 2018 06:19AM ToughCookie101 wrote:

Hi Crystal, these are all hard choices! I was diagnosed November 2017 at the age of 33. I had a unilateral nipple sparing mastectomy on Feb. 1st with immediate reconstruction (placement of tissue expander). My tumor was in the axially tail, so perfect placement for a lumpectomy, however one of the reasons I choose mastectomy was to hopefully avoid radiation. I also carry a rare variant of unknown significance in the ATM gene that might possibly increase my risk of recurrence if I undergo radiation. My sentinel node was clear, no LVI, however I did end up with a focally positive margin, which no one was expecting. Since I had a mastectomy, they can't go back in and take anything else. So I am now on the fence for radiation. My radiation oncologist thinks best to avoid rads if I do chemo, but she is consulting with other radiation oncologists as we speak. I will likely be starting four rounds of Taxotere Cyclophosphamide next week, but that is still being confirmed. I am also hoping to have the other breast removed and a tissue expander placed at the same time as my exchange surgery. Good luck with the choice, and take comfort in knowing that you are making whatever choice is right for you.

Dx 11/15/2017, DCIS/IDC, Left, 2cm, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH)
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Mar 13, 2018 03:50PM CrystalMarieG31 wrote:

Thank you for the feedback ladies!! Yes I agree no easy choices to make! But it makes me feel better knowing that there are other young women out there going through the same process and able to make choices that are best for them. My oncologist hasn't spoke to much about the specifics yet such as radiation or anything, they are waiting until I am closer to finishing chemo but I do have an appointment with my surgeon next week so hoping I learn more about what he thinks then and better understand what my team sees and what is going to be the best plan. I have a lot of questions about the radiation piece still so it was interesting to hear the discussion on that and how that contributed to the decision making. Again thanks for the responses :) Smile That is the key message I have to take in, is that whatever I decide is mine and whats right for me.

Dx 12/14/2017, IDC, Right, Stage IIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 12/28/2017 AC + T (Taxol)
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Mar 14, 2018 01:30AM Roots wrote:

HI All, J

ust introducing myself. 34 from Ontario Canada. It was confirmed today that I have bc and I was told that because there were so many masses which developed so quickly, I would be looking at a mastectomy and chemo. I have a hard time beleiveing that since there are still so many follow up tests to do. I'm worried about myself of course, but I'm having a harder time time thinking about how to do this with my kids. And how to tell my kids (ages 5 and 8). My husband also just took a new job (which we need him to keep!) that has his working out of town 50% of the time. Ugh, just venting on that part.

Has anyone been told that it's general protocol usually to be more aggressive with younger bc patients. I was told today by my case coordinator that most bc patients under 40 get chemo. ANyone else hear this?

I'm glad to meet all of you, even if it is under unfortunate circumstances.

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Mar 14, 2018 05:18AM Valentina7 wrote:

Hi Roots,

I was diagnosed in November 2017, I am 33. I was several times informed that ladies under 40 usually get fast growing cancers...i didn't need chemo and my cancer doesn't grow fast, which makes me wonder why...

I only hope I got the correct treatment.

Dx 11/27/2017, IDC, Right, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/5 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 12/20/2017 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Hormonal Therapy 1/12/2018 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy 1/22/2018 Breast
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Mar 14, 2018 05:46AM ToughCookie101 wrote:

Hi Roots, I also live in Ontario (Ottawa), and I was diagnosed last November at the age of 33. I did hear the general consensus is that women under 40 OFTEN have chemo recommended, but not always. They CAN have more aggressive cancers (don't fret, they are still treatable, mine was aggressive at grade 3 and lymph node was clear As Valentina points out, they aren't always more aggressive in younger women). Also, sometimes they are more aggressive with younger women since we have a lot more life left in us. However, every case and treatment plan is different. I had a 2cm tumor, and it was in the perfect spot for lumpectomy. I oped for a unilateral nipple sparing mastectomy with reconstruction. I currently have the tissue expander in place, and so far I don't regret that choice. I am actually going to see about getting the other breast removed too. Smaller, hormone positive cancers, lower grade, are less likely to need chemo.

Do you have the pathology of your tumor yet? As you mention, there are so many more tests to do, that I think the comment they made to you about likely needing chemo is preemptive. The cancer I had was very high ER & PR positive, and I could have opted just for hormone therapies and radiation, however I decided to do chemo and the hormone therapies (no rads). My oncologist put more weight on the hormone therapy in my case then the chemo, but every case is different. Some people only needs rads and hormone therapies, etc. There can be many options.

I start chemo next week. I actually just made the final decision today to do chemo, I found that a hard choice. I don't have kids yet, and freezing my eggs failed. I am taking a chance loosing my fertility, among other side effects, but I weighed the risks and begrudgingly decided to do it. I'll take a few months of pain for long term gain. Try and take it one step at a time, since until they have the full picture, they can't really guide you on the next steps. The waiting part is hard, but it will get easier.

Dx 11/15/2017, DCIS/IDC, Left, 2cm, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH)
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7 hours ago cajunqueen15 wrote:

Hiya, Roots. I had just turned 35 when dx and I think it is standard to be more aggressive with younger patients. We can take stronger, longer treatment and we tend to have more aggressive cancers, so I think it's a two-fold approach. I feel pain for you thinking about your kids. Mine were so young that I just told the truth and they had no concept of it and still don't, really, even though the twins are now 5. You know your kids and know how best to handle this situation. Praying for you, mama!

35 @ dx. BRCA2. Disciple, wife, mother of twins (5) & son (3), attorney. e3 trial (complete). Blue/MammaPrint, High-risk Luminal B. Prolia (start 6/16). Dx 7/22/2015, DCIS, Left, <1cm, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 8/28/2015, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 2/11 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 8/28/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant Surgery 4/12/2016 Prophylactic ovary removal Hormonal Therapy 4/19/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Surgery 8/1/2017 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant Radiation Therapy Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol)

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