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I WANT MY MOJO BACK!

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  • richmondnan
    richmondnan Member Posts: 23
    edited January 2005
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    Hooptie,
    Oh yes, our own self image is a big factor in the mojo equation...(I think they say the brain is the largest sex organ?)
    And yes, its nice to have energy for something besides "fighting" the bc!
    Hugs
    Nan
  • Sphynx
    Sphynx Member Posts: 17
    edited January 2005
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    Just bringing this back to the top so Pharmacygirl can find it.

    image
  • Ltb3105
    Ltb3105 Member Posts: 56
    edited January 2005
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    Seriously folks, I am thinking of seeing a sex therapist. SOMEthing HAS to be wrong with me! I was never that enthused about sex in the first place, but since dx, tx, menopause symptoms, it is practically nonexistent. I mean, the nuns in the convent must be having a better time than I am!

    Where do I even begin to find a sex therapist, or should I seek out a marriage counselor?

    What do you all think I should do?

    Laura
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited January 2005
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    Thanks, found it! I'm reading!

    Love,

    Barb
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited January 2005
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    Hey,

    Regarding the dryness issue, does it also mean "outer" sexual organs like clitoris? I got an "infection" that was treated with Metrogel last month. It hurt me when my husband touched my clitoris. That was what made me know something was wrong. Its better now, but I was reading that this wonderful problem could affect that too? What do you all know about this??

    Thanks!!!

    Barb
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited January 2005
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    Hi,

    Ok I ordered my first "pocket rocket". I even threw in the batteries!!! ha ha ha. At this point I'm willing to give it a shot. I'll let you know how it works out!!!

    Barb
  • Kathy_Verett
    Kathy_Verett Member Posts: 8
    edited January 2005
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    Barb,

    As for the dryness issue, Astroglide works wonders and I saw that it comes in flavors, too. Be careful! A little goes a long way.

    God bless your day!
    Kathy
  • richmondnan
    richmondnan Member Posts: 23
    edited January 2005
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    Y'all, I've found the K-y works great too. I think it is a bit cheaper? Also helps if things take a bit "longer" if you know what I mean
    Nan
  • Mena
    Mena Member Posts: 263
    edited January 2005
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    Hi Rachel -- Yes, several er+ ladies here have or are now using testosterone successfully. My onc said "no", but probably because I'm only in tx for mets for five months and she feels I'm doing well and doesn't want to mess with anything.

    Laura, yes, please see this sex therapist and come back with juicy tips for us...How's that for selfless motivation hahahaha...We can start up a coffee-can collection to pay for the sessions.

    Are some of us still dry??? Oh my...The aforementioned AstoGlide is great, although not everyone likes it. I do, and I also like the KY Warming Liquid. See how damn easy I am????

    Looks like poontang is on the menu for me...Got my results from my first set o' scans. Onc says I have "exceeded" her expectations! I am responding to tx, and my tumors are shrinking! I couldn't think of a better place to share this news than here with my hope-to-be-horny buddies. I'm sure Mojo has helped! And if I believe, then it it's true.
  • Kathy_Verett
    Kathy_Verett Member Posts: 8
    edited January 2005
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    Mena,
    You go girl!! So good to hear that tx is working. ALL the tx hahaha.

    God bless your day!
    Kathy
  • richmondnan
    richmondnan Member Posts: 23
    edited January 2005
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    Mena, I am so thrilled to hear your news!!!!!!!!! Hallelujah for good things.
    Sounds like some celebration is in order.
    HUGS
    Nan
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited January 2005
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    Yeah Mena!
  • Sierra
    Sierra Member Posts: 180
    edited January 2005
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    Hi Gals:

    I give up.. sorry you
    all have fun for me.. though.
    cant take it any more..
    LOL..

    Think Ill retreat to the North Country..


    Sierra )
  • scorpiox55
    scorpiox55 Member Posts: 10
    edited January 2005
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    YEA MENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEA MENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YEA MENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FANTASTIC NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHRINK THOSE SUCKAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JO

  • Ltb3105
    Ltb3105 Member Posts: 56
    edited January 2005
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    How do I even BEGIN to look for a sex therapist? Call information and say, "gee, uh, ahem, do you have any listings for sex therapists in this area?" Do I call my insurance people or can i maybe look it up on the net, my ins. has doctors you can find in the network...doubt they'll list them as sex doc's, maybe a marriage counselor can steer me in the right direction???

    Laura
  • Glad
    Glad Member Posts: 17
    edited January 2005
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    Hey, Mena!! Hip Hip Hooray for tiny little shrunken tumors!! I am really pleased for you, honey!
    xoxox
    G
  • SpanArtist
    SpanArtist Member Posts: 38
    edited January 2005
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    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY, MENA!!!!!!!! I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PLEASED and THRILLED for you!!! SUCH WONDERFUL NEWS!!! And nooky too...YOU GO, GIRL!!!

  • Sphynx
    Sphynx Member Posts: 17
    edited January 2005
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    Got a mojo joke for you ... it may be too risque' for the humor section...

    Airline Pilot

    A jumbo jet is just coming into the Tampa Airport on its final approach.

    The pilot comes on the intercom, "This is your Captain. We're on our final descent into Tampa. I want to thank you for flying with us today and I hope you enjoy your stay in Tampa Bay".

    He forgets to switch off the intercom. Now the whole plane can hear his conversation from the cockpit. The copilot says to the pilot, "Well, skipper, watcha gonna do in Tampa?"

    "Well," says the skipper, "first I'm gonna check into the hotel and take a big crap.... then I'm gonna take that new stewardess with the huge tits out for dinner.... then I'm gonna wine and dine her, take her back to my room and put it to her big time all night."

    Everyone on the plane hears this and immediately begins looking up and down the aisle trying to get a look at the new stewardess.

    Meanwhile the new stewardess is at the very back of the plane. She's so embarrassed that she starts to run to try and get to the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle, she trips over an old lady's bag and down she goes.

    The old lady leans over and says: "No need to hurry, dear. He's gotta take a crap first."
  • slr38
    slr38 Member Posts: 4
    edited January 2005
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    I haven't had that good of a laugh in a long time. Thanks for the belly laugh!

  • Ltb3105
    Ltb3105 Member Posts: 56
    edited January 2005
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    I've got one too, and it's an airplane joke as well. This one's more risque as I have to use the F word so here goes:

    Seems there was gonna be a crash...only three people on the plane, the pilot, co-pilot and one stewardess.

    The pilot laments on the fact that there are only two parachutes to make a quick escape.

    So the co-pilot goes, "what about Cathy?" and the pilot goes, "oh, fuck her".

    The co-pilot replied: "do you think we've got time?"

    HAHAHAHAHAHA.

    Laura
  • Claiire
    Claiire Member Posts: 60
    edited January 2005
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    Lingerie or no lingerie... how do you feel? Does it make anything any "better" or "sexier"?
  • connierc
    connierc Member Posts: 24
    edited January 2005
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    Hi Laura,

    IMHO, I think seeking out a sex therapist is a FANTASTIC idea! I have a friend who is in that field, and she has spoken with me quite a bit ... and HER mother had a double mast. So, she understands from whence I come :-) (or not, as the case may be! LOL....)

    Now, where to find one? I would first call the local hospital. Indeed, look in a phone book under "therapist, sex' or "sex counselors." This is not something I have tried to do, but if you use the internet yellow pages, you might have some luck.

    Also, if there is a BC Support Group in your area (usually associated with the hospital or chemo place), they could help you.

    Hey, chemo place! Bet the chemo nurses would be able to help you find someone! They HAVE heard it all, are TOTALLY aware of what happens to us, and could point you in the right direction.

    IF I manage to have 1/2 a brain this Thursday, I meet with my local BC Support Group, and I'll ask them about it.

    And, no, this is NOT a stupid thing to ask, at all! Maybe it could work for EVERYONE who is interested (and has insurance!), and couples could go, as well -- since that is the idea, right? Of course, if "you" (the collective you) is single, then talking with someone about "getting excited and staying excited long enough to have the big O" is very important.

    Laura, thanks for bringing this into the discussion -- STUPENDOUS! WE can ALL benefit from what anyone finds out about this particular subject of sex counselor/ therapist.

    Warm regards,
    ConnierC
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited January 2005
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    Dear Claire,

    Hi! Regarding your lingerie question. I think it absolutely helps. Here's what I found. I had a mastectomy with a reconstruction that didnt go to well. I have about 80% of my right breast. I could never find a bra that fight right or that made me look "normal". My husband went on Victoria's secret website and was "looking". He showed me a padded bra that had no underwire. He ordered two of them for me for Christmas. I was very skeptical. Well they look great! It did wonders for my self esteem. I look balanced again. I ordered some of their lingerie and it looks great. It makes me feel better about myself. That and some KY jelly and warming lotion and things are working out for us. I actually had a pre BC orgasm the other night. I was so happy because I was beginning to think it would never happen. I had my last treatment in June 2003. I think what helped me was the lingerie/bras. I just keep them on and in my mind I feel like "me". Does any of this make sense? Anyway, I've been meaning to post but I hadn't gotten to it. I highly recommend this to everyone. Worked for me!

    All the best!

    Barb
  • richards
    richards Member Posts: 1
    edited January 2005
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    Great one. I laughed out loud!! Thanks
    Eilidh
  • Ltb3105
    Ltb3105 Member Posts: 56
    edited January 2005
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    I have an appt. with my pdoc next month, think I will ask her about it, since antidepressants *can* put a damper on the libido, I'm sure she's got lots of patients with the same complaints and can steer me in the right direction!!

    I've got all kinds of whammies going against me: chemo-induced menopause, antidepressants, and a shitty relationship right now with my dh, that makes 3 strikes for killing the libido!

    Sometimes, I wonder if I've still got it in me!!! I often think about having an affair just to see if I'm still interested in sex!!

    Laura
  • connierc
    connierc Member Posts: 24
    edited January 2005
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    PLEASE NOTE: This is a "clinically-descriptive" post. I do not want to offend anyone, so I am saying this "up front." Nothing in here is truly offensive, and no foul language had been used. ALSO NOTE: The links I have attached will bring you to pages on the "Adam & Eve" website, which is FOR ADULTS ONLY . Some might be shocked at the "presentation" of the items, but the great prices are worth looking at, for lubricants and other "toys." PLEASE, DO NOT open these links when minors are present or if you are easily offended! Thank you....


    Hello Ladies! I know, it's been a while since I contributed anything USEFUL to our discussion .. life has just been a bit wearisome lately, I'm sorry....

    OK, UPDATE:

    "REKINDLE" ' - which is a over-the-counter, homeopathic pill-form medication (with NO hormones!), which is for WOMEN who need / want to increase sexual desire, function, and attain orgasm. A bottle of these pills cost about $14 (I think, don't have price label anymore, could be more...) for 90 pills, which are taken 2 a day. Says it takes about 3-4 weeks to "kick in."

    Well, IT HAS! ! Or at least, something has changed. Is it taking these pills? I don't know, but at least NOW I'm getting self-lubrication, though it still takes TIME to get as lubricated, as before all this, I was TOO lubricated! Ah, life is so ironic sometimes... .

    SECOND: We have used two "new to us" lubricants for me. One was the "KY Heating Gel." Sorry to say, but for us, it did ZIPPO. Nothing "heated," I'm sad to say.

    HOWEVER, the other lubricant / sexual enjoyment-enhancement DOES seem to have some positive effect. This is called, " FINALLY : THE SOLUTION FOR WOMEN." Purchased at good old Walmart! Again, high price for VERY small tube .... $14 for .7 fl. oz. About four uses, I would say. This is a clitoral stimulator, heats up very nicely when gently massaged on clitoris and inner and outer labial folds. The box says "NOW UP TO 30 APPLICATIONS!" YEAH, RIGHT, IN THEIR DREAMS....

    But -- it DOES seem to have worked.

    One of the "problems" I'm finding, is that since it has been, and still is, a LONG time between bouts of sexual intercourse, my hubby is VERY intent on making sure I achieve the Big O! Gotta love a partner like that!

    But...he's a bit too anxious, and I must remind him in a gently, teasing way, to take his time and "tease" the sensations from the clitoris, not try and "make it happen" as fast as he can! LOL! He's learning!

    This may be true for many of you, as well. If your partners are truely thoughtful of your needs, they will be more than willing to listen to what you have to say.

    And yes, it takes MUCH LONGER to achieve any pleasure than it used to, IF it happens at all. Sometimes, I will confess, I "pretend," since I know it's not gonna happen, so that HE can have his release. I think you all know where I'm coming from on that account, sadly.

    The other interesting item: After a year of chemo-induced menopause, I have started menstruating again. "Auntie Flow" came back with a vengeance, trying to make up for lost time I guess, making me almost beg for hot flashes again.... . HOWEVER .... this ALSO seems to be helping in the self-lubrication process! YEEHAW!

    Now I know this sounds like we are having WAY too much fun -- LOL! In actuality, sadly, I would say we have had actual intercourse maybe five / six times this past year. Most of the time, I happily "help him out," in any way that I can. And the last time, about a week ago, THAT was when I noticed that my OWN lubrication had returned!

    So, there IS HOPE!

    Oh, also, I am attaching a "sale" on the ever-popular "POCKET ROCKET." This link will bring you to an XX-RATED site, the "Adam & Eve" catalog website. THIS SHOULD NOT BE OPENED WHEN CHILDREN ARE PRESENT!

    http://www.adameve.com/collection.asp?sc=E012005B&page=1&sortby=date_added&view=2

    I DO hope this has come out so that you can just click on it. This is the SALE page, and the POCKET ROCKET is priced at !! $5.99 !! (with a few addition clitoral stimulators and waterproof, to boot!). Since one of my own "PR's" has died, I will be purchasing one or more of these.

    A WORD OF ADVICE: If you are NOT going to be using it for a while, TAKE THE BATTERIES OUT! I left mine in, they corroded, and ruined the little beauty.... :-(

    I also HIGHLY recommend their heating lubricants called 'Midnite Fire Massage Lotion." Link follows. Although these are smaller bottles than I have had in the past, these will give you a variety of flavors to choose from. We have enjoyed them in the past. Hope YOU enjoy them in the future! !

    http://www.adameve.com/product_id=8524/category_name=ss_lubricants/catalog_name=adameve/product.htm

    OK, I think that is about it for Connie's "Update" on various products. With great hope, these will be of some use to others out there who are in the, um, same postition, so to speak!

    HUGS AND GOOD HUNTING!

    Connierc
  • susan_CNY
    susan_CNY Member Posts: 64
    edited January 2005
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    Connie, thank you so much for the info! before my hysterectomy at 32, I had natural lubrication, after that the breakthrough bleeding was the only salvation I had. I wish there were docs that cared enough to investigate that subject.I am now 53 and hate to admit that my 3 weeks out of 4 while bleeding were the sexiest moments of my life, and the introduction of cancer, maybe I should have refused the hysterectomy, just could not afford to keep the Kotex company in business and support my 3 kids, gotta do what the big guys suggest! For what that is worth. If its nots your wife, who cares?

  • marie5890
    marie5890 Member Posts: 111
    edited January 2005
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    (bumping for flowergirl)

  • SimplySouth
    SimplySouth Member Posts: 1
    edited January 2005
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    Dear Ladies,

    I am a newby to this list, but have been uplifted by the very frank, funny, honest sharing I have found here on the subject.

    As I have scanned through the massive number of posts, I realize, I am not alone and this is a MAJOR problem for so many Breast Cancer survivors, but yet so many medical providers are unable or unwilling to deal with the issue [at least here in north Florida].

    I sign off tonight resolved to renew my fight to find a solution for my own situation and not allow the naysayers to rain on my parade any longer.......

    A big thank you to each and every one of you....

    Deborah
    53
    [Florida]

    BC-T1 NOD-neg..... ER+ PR+
    Hysterectomy - age 28 [Endometrial Hyperplasia]
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 282
    edited January 2005
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    Hi Deborah, where are you in North Florida? are you on the Gulf coast side? A bunch of us are planning on a get together this Spring, and if you live over on this side, maybe you'd like to join us. We thought New Orleans would be a central meeting place, since some of us live in Pensacola/Panama City area and some in Mississippi, and some in Louisanna area. Hope to see ya again soon on the boards.

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