Im bitchy, I moan, I groan.....anyway.
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OMG -- those are great!!! I can imagine running around after my kitty so she gets her exercise, and me too!
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Can I get a personal "that sucks"? ... pretty please? I'm leaving in a moment from work to go get a seroma (that popped up 10 weeks out from my DIEP) aspirated. Oh, joy.
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THAT SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Thank you, Kathleen! I DO appreciate it
gayle
p.s. it went fine ... btw, I have always thought it strange that sometimes the meds they give you to keep something from being painful are painful in themselves! in this case, lidocaine injections -- long, drawn out bee stings. what's with THAT??
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Oooooh, you didn't need the lidocaine! The needle insertion for that would have been enough to do the draining! I had a seroma drained and didn't get freezing so I wouldn't have to have more needles. The seroma was painful enough that I didn't even feel the needles, just the relief as it drained.
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Hi everyone..I haven't posted here before and hope you don't mind my intrusion, but I'm really bitchy tonight and feel the need to vent, and think this may be the right thread.
First off, had a mx on Dec 11th. Met with the onco last Friday, but much to my surprise, no ER/PR/Her2 results available yet, so a little tough to discuss treatment plans....almost 6 weeks now, and still waiting for path results!!! As per the onco's instrustions, I left a message Monday for the nurse to find out if results are in, but no call back Monday or yesterday. Left another message today, still no call back....needless to say, not impressed with nurse Debbie.
Met with a genetic counsellor today re BRCA testing. She wanted to know why the onco had sent an 'urgent' referral and she gave me the 3rd degree about potentially jumping the queue when people here are waiting the normal 6 to 12 months for results (ie. why are you so special?). Anyway, felt totally uncomfortable and eventually said "I'd prefer if you call the onc and ask him for explanation". From there, headed off for blood work for the BRCA and waited forever. Then went over to the hospital next door to see if the medical note that I need for work was ready (requested last week)...no, not ready. Came home, and shortly after got a call from the hospital saying my medical note was ready and would I like to pick it up?? GGRRRR
Kept waiting for phone to ring and to get a call from the nurse re my path report. Phone rings...it's the social worker asking if I'd like support with discussing cancer and mastectomy with my kids???? I said, "well I was diagnosed Nov 12th, had surgery 6 weeks ago, and my kids obviously know, are doing ok, but thanks anyway". She said she'd send me some literature anyway in case it's helpful.....GGRRRR....okee dokee, thanks. Phone rings again, it's the hospital number so hoping again it's the nurse about path results re hormone receptor results....no, it's a reminder about my appt tomorrow for phsyio (for this annoying cording problem since ALND). I was fit to be tied. Seriously, rather than all the repetitive glossy brochures and info packages ( I got 2 packages in the mail today with the same info I'd already received) and daily reminders about appointments, how about investing a couple of dollars in speeding up lab reports?
DH came home from work and wanted to know what was wrong because I was clearly in a bad mood. I had a hard time trying to explain how pis*ed and bitchy I am. I'm so sick of this cancer sh*t invading my life 24/7, and the cancer-related info that I need to figure out next steps, never seems to be available when I need it.
It's that kind of day, I could go on and on, but I know you've all been there and probably much worse at times. Thanks for listening.......venting was a bit therapeutic I think. On to tomorrow....
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Welcome Mich, YOU GO GIRL! Sometimes we just need to vent and writing it in here for all of us to relate to is therapeutic, AND IT'S FREE!! Bring it! And bring some cupcakes too!
Quick update; After not coming home for 6 nights, SiL left town. We changed the locks, we told his Dad. We went to the courthouse and got papers to fill out and file for whatever action DD decides. We printed out his phone usage and changed his number (pending cutting it off alltogether). We feel decidedly better and stronger and in charge. Now, I gotta start moving out a room full of storage and excercise equipment and I can't lift more than about 15 lbs, hahahahaha. I have faith that it will get done and DD can move in here by the end of Feb. That gives us time to take the necessary legal action and somehow move her & baby out of that house.
Court tomorrow with DD#1... she has not prepared.
CRAP .. . THAT PISSES ME OFF.. I TAUGHT THEM ALL TO BE PREPARED AND ON TIME.
You are all right, though. I raised them the best I could, decisions they make now are not my fault or financial responsibility. DH would be proud of me!
~Connie
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Mich -- What a pain in the butt!! I do like how you handled the genetic counsellor. The nerve!!! And, would they flippin' hurry up with the pathology!!!! Geesh!
Connie -- We're all proud of you! Good luck tomorrow with DD#1. Perhaps your other DD (or both of them) can prepare the room for you -- you shouldn't be moving that stuff around! I hope that you have some peace and quiet SOON.
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Barbe, gf, I am sure you are right! JUST what you said. I had wondered about it, but you know how it goes ... ok, sure, whatever you want to do, do it, let's get this over ..... wait, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch! But it wasn't all that and I AM glad I had it done. Only 5 ccs but they will test it for cancer cells just in case, as I'm a stage IIIer.
The first time I had (MUCH bigger) seromas drained after my first mast (100?cc+), I couldn't care less about the pain of the needle aspiration, as the seromas themselves were more painful just sitting there!
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Hi Ladies,
Today was so busy. I had to be at DD3 house to babysit so she could attend her class. Had appt to see my therapist and took Granddd with me, that's the FIRST time she's been somewhere without her mommy (it was great). My therapist loved her. Then back to the baby's house for lunch and put down for a nap. Meet up with DD1 and we went to court. Court turned out to be very casual, not at all what I imagined. Her lawyer didn't show up, so they set a new date. Good. She's got two mandatory classes to take before going back in, and she's calling about a new lawyer tomorrow.
DD3 is going to finish her degree and possibly go for another, which is awesome. It gives her some away time with new people and challenges that aren't emotional. Her husband, we hear from friends, is somewhere in NC. He hasn't been home in 9 nights. He did come by, however, and discovered we changed the deadbolt lock on her front door so she could sleep. I swear, she pushed and pulled a dresser in front of the door to prevent him from coming in while she was sleeping. (He did that and took groceries and the DVD player). We are following him via his phone call records. Funny, he doesn't even know. His phone is on my account and I will be cutting him off whenever she says.
My dh is stressing the fact that dd and granddd will be moving in with us, although he is coming around, suggesting where to store stuff, but not offering to move anything except his treadmill yet. I'm more like, shoot, we raised three kids, countless cats and a couple of dogs in this house, one smart daughter and baby is no big deal. Actually, I'm rather excited about them coming. Life goes on. Grandchildren are testament to that. Now, how to let him think it's his idea that we bring her dog and cat with her. Well... where else are they supposed to go?
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Connie -- It sounds like things are simmering down -- good stuff!! Definitely need to bring the cat and dog! I'm sure you can work some magic and make your DH think it was his idea!!
Angel -- we haven't seen you around for a while -- been thinking of you! Miss you a lot.
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My current IOS:
I've "discovered" lots of people on Facebook that I had lost touch with decades ago. One example is a woman from my high school graduating class. She contacted me 3 years ago about something, but then we slipped apart again.
Three weeks ago, I found her on FB and we "friended" each other. Two days ago, she posted as her FB update that she had just finished her 2nd chemo treatment.
???
Turns out, she has Stage II BC, with 3 positive nodes. Cr*p. Double-cr*p. This really sux.
And, for everybody else... that sux, too!
otter
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Well, things have settled down because the messed up husband left town. DD is very concerned about what to do when he decided to come home. Part of me wants to set him up, let him get caught driving in a drunken or drugged state and they (the police) take him away. But I don't think or feel thats the best answer, it would be short term and ultimately expensive.
If he doesn't go to jail, he and maybe both of them need counseling at the least. We will need some assistance, as they are both unemployed and uninsured.
He has said he wuld be home on wednesday. She doesn't want him in the house. I dont know where he will go.
Otter - THAT SUX.
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Hugs for you Otter, that sucks, Connie, family problems are not what we need at this time. We need cosseting and empathy and all to be right with the world.
I'm so glad I found this thread as I need to vent and reading other people's problems makes me feel some sort of relief, perhaps it's the sisterhood, who knows but it does help.
What bugged me all along was the way all my relatives have lived such unhealthy lifestyles, suffer from many obesity related problems, continue to stuff themselves with pure junk food, yet here I am, the only healthy eater with a reasonably good diet and I'm the one who gets cancer. While I'm suffering from chemo, no breasts, loss of hair, rad burns, there they are ignoring their health needs, clogging up their arteries, pouring syrup over their pancakes while needing insulin for diabetes, complaining about arthritic knees and back injuries while eating their 10th piece of birthday cake. It's so not fair! My apologies to those who are overweight, yes I truly know how hard it is, I too have yo-yoed from healthy weight to overweight and back, eating to soothe emotions and getting into the cycle of emotional eating because my clothes no longer fit and making it all worse, but there must be a point when we say, "enough... my life is more important than this next piece of cake". Since I got my diagnosis 6 months ago when I was at my heaviest, I've lost about 12Kgs / 2Stone / 28lbs so my BMI is now 22, (Yay!), juice every day (yum), exercise a lot, eat tons of anti-cancer foods and I'll do whatever it takes to ensure the monster stays in it's den.
I encouraged my mother to slim down and eat healthy when she was diagnosed with diabetes but she denied she was overweight despite being borderline obese. She was the one who taught me to have a healthy diet but I discovered she didn't follow her own advice. Now a decade later she has neglected her health so much she has to have insulin in the evenings but due to early dementia she forgets every night to have the injection. She forgets how to take it and also always has a week or so of medications sitting unopened on her table whenever I visit her, a 3 hour round trip. Last week one of her teeth fell out. She snoozes all day. It's just a matter of time before she lapses into a diabetic coma. She is very independent and thinks my younger sister (who is a nurse), is trying to get her put in a home when we are just trying to get her to take medications and pay her bills.
We caught her driving without registration or insurance and it took hours and many temper tantrums from her to find out where to get her bill details so we could pay for her insurance and registration on-line. Every time she misses a payment she says it's only one mistake and can't remember having the phone disconnected, the bank sending warning letters etc. Her Dr. says there is nothing we can do other than watch her and try to help. She is on a waiting list to have a full dementia test, the mini mental a few months ago showed borderline for dementia but yesterday on computer chat she was looking at the December calendar thinking it was the current month despite having Xmas a month ago. If I remind her to take her medications while on computer chat she says she'll take them later and gets annoyed that she can look after herself thanks and tells me she takes them every day.
Once the dementia test comes back positive she won't be allowed to drive and she may be put on an urgent waiting list for some sort of supervised accommodation but she's adamant that she is able to live independently. She is a hoarder and doesn't clean any more though hygiene has always been so important. Clutter on the floor is a fall hazard. I don't know how we will move her as we aren't able to touch or look at anything in her house without her having an anxiety attack.
I know her life is her own business and it's been her choice to ignore the weight and diabetes problems but that doesn't make it less painful to watch. She could go into a diabetic coma (like her mother did) at any time, or have a stroke or heart attack. I have to accept at 82 she has lived her life and made her choices and she is near the end of her life and let my sister who is a nurse talk mother into moving into supervised accommodation while I de-stress.
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Hey!!! Where's Angel-of-the-clown-suit!!! Haven't heard from her in awhile. Hope she is doing okay....
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Angellllll -- where are you? I miss your funny wardrobe malfunction stories! This summer I hope to make it to your neck of the woods to visit a girlfriend -- I'd love to see you too. I miss you so much.
Elizabeth
xoxoxoxooooooooo
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Sheila - that is a handful of stress you're carrying. Wish we could something for you and your Mom. It must be very difficult to manage dementia and safety.
Elizabeth - you know, I never did find out how your move went. Is everything okay?
Angel - I miss you too. What's happening?
Mich - welcome to the crab fest! I know how frustrating waiting for results or getting stuff you need from a doctor's office. My HMO insurance requires a referral from my PCP for EVERYTHING. I have taken to faxing the requests since getting through on the phone is fruitless and even faxing requires follow-up!
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Otter,
AWW.... THAT SUX!! You reconnect with an old friend, only to find that she has joined our club!
This club is not as 'exclusive' as I'd like...
Hope everyone has a non sucky day without any issues of suckiness...
Harley
My IOS lately is that I think I may want to go back to college, but I can't afford it... I called the VA GIBILL hotline and it's a real joke... my dh is retired NAVY... they said that because he is retired, I can't use his GI BILL.... crap... now I have to go rob a bank or something so I can afford to go back to school. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, but now... after bc... I think I might have an inkling... only to find out that there is probably no way I'll be able to afford to go.
I think that others have far worse problems.... so sorry for whining....
Harley
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Hi Kathleen -- the move went fine. I still have some stuff in storage in Boston -- I'm making a trip down this weekend to pick up more of my crap and also see my b/f. Mom seems to be doing OK with my BC, at least around me. She freaks out about it to my sister (the one I like). My other sister, who I haven't spoken to for years, just called me. I guess she called out of some sisterly duty but I know she's dividing the inheritance by one less person, hoping she'll get more with me gone. Otherwise, waiting on a clinical trial...
Sorry, didn't mean to make such a long post!
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Hi everybody,
Kathleen....your picture cracked me up. That is too funny. Not the bunny slippers, the old lady one. (Can't remember her name....imagine that.)
Sheila, sorry about your mom. That sucks. My Mom is in poor health (not as bad) too and it is hard to watch them NOT try to do anything to make it better. I'm sorry girl.
Mich....your GRRRR's were making me a laugh too. Sorry about your crap. Vent away sister. I got my BRCA test results back in no time....I can't remember exactly but a week...maybe two?? Why are they telling you months? I don't understand that. Hugs girl.
Everybody else.....that sucks as needed!!!! And (((((hugs)))))) all the way around. I'm at work so can't stay long; just came on to pay respect to our new angels.
Laptop still broken. Sister is done with 3rd treatment.
Love you girls.
Traci
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Hey -- important.... we have a sister who was chemo overdosed on her first treatment. She damn near died and THAT would have been the worst insult any medical team could do.
I'm so upset by the treatment she received, or rather, failed to receive, that we need to ask a cancer treatment center to STEP UP and pick of the medical communities slack.
This is serious. She received 75% MORE CHEMO THAN ORDERED. Her toenails turned black, she was violently sick for WEEKS. Finally, she is able to see the light and has realized that she was horribly mistreated. And the hospital that did this, expects her to return for MORE!!!!
I've started a new thread, and I'm asking for your help to bump it constantly, until a person or a treatment center stands up and offers to treat her. It's called IMMEDIATE HELP NEEDED, under the Chemo and Treatment forum. If you want to read what happened, we are talking about it under the 'can we have a forum for older people'.
Thanks all you wonderful bc members.
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Perhaps an investigative (newspaper) reporter would do a story. Contact a local newspaper and let them roll with it.
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Elizabeth - just outsmart your sister and live longer than she does - you can do it! I'm so glad the move went well and you got to see your b/f this past weekend.
Traci - her name is Maxine and I just love her. She says all the things you wish you could say!
And for Dar who got zapped with an overdose of chemo:
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Barbe - that's a good question! Angel, if you are reading this, please let us know how you are. The last time Angel (avatar name ymb) logged on was December 18, 2009. In one of her posts she makes mention of her 19 year old daughter having inoperable pancreatic cancer. I pray she did not take a turn for the worse. Additionaly, as she notes in her tag line, both her mother and sister died of breast cancer.
Please Lord, let her be okay.
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Connie....I can't find that thread....can you post a link?
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Here's the link,
http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/69/topic/747613?page=2#idx_31
It's about the member named StillVertical. she's really been in a mess with her onc and team not calling her back even after 2 ER visits. So sad. But she says tonight that she is s eeking help at another nearby medical center in NC.
I think she wants to keep it more of a non-public event and is working to get the lab and blood work reports for the infusion that she received. I went a bit ballistic - just so angry at the treatments she did NOT receive as well as the apparently wrong one that she did get. Doctors just don't need to be treating people like this. Much less BC patients that trust them. ARRGH.
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My moan for today: I am in an apartment and was thinking of moving since there have been issues that I won't go into. The one I found was perfect but someone else got there first and rented it. BUMMER... Should I go on a month to month and hope another one comes up or take the smaller one that is ok, but not perfect? It will be a major improvement with ceiling fan in the bedroom, small fireplace in the living room, reserved underground parking, elevators, trash chute on each floor and 1/3 less rent per month. Same general neighborhood. And newly renovated with self cleaning oven, built in microwave, all new appliances. I need to give 60 days notice to move and have another week to make up my mind... or go month to month.
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Definitely go month-to-month! You've been pondering this for a while if I recall correctly and look...you just lost an opportunity! Keep us posted.
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Can you talk to the landlord of the one that got away and see if they anticipate any other units coming up in the next couple of months? They probably already know who is planning to leave in the next two months.
If not, go month to month.
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Thanks for the input. I am going to go month to month as both here and there you are required to give 60 days notice. and Yes, barbe, I have been pondering for a while. June and July are the big moving months, according to the other place.
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