Stop Smoking Support Thread
Comments
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Sue - I am so sorry that you have had so many loses in such a short time...sending you Big Gentle Hugs of Encouragement...
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I don't know how the weather is for everyone else, but I think we all need some cheering up....so I vote for some smoothies and skivvees nights across the world!
I will be in my skivvees and enjoying a smoothie in one hand and a "Bethany" in the other (hahaha) in exactly an hour on the back deck listening to some zac brown band...snuggle with my pup, and RELAX!
So, whoever wants to join me...ok....if not....ok...hahaha but you all now know what I will be doing!
Much Love To All!
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Hi Butterfly - bummer I missed joining you yesterday...hope you have fun
I hope everyone is doing well...
If anyone has news on Pantafus please let us know how she is doing.
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thanks for thoughts and hugs. It felt soooooooooo good to vent! I hope all of you join me in NOT smoking. You have to pick a date, no matter what. I waited for 2-3 wks after I had the dog put down so I could mourn a bit. I picked April 15 (My husband was a CPA so it seemed like a good date) and that was that. I could find any excuse in the book to change the date but I knew if I kept putting it off, I would never quit.
Now I need some help from the quitters. Quitting got easier on day 4 but now I have been off them for 8 wks and I wish the occasional craving would go away.
Anyone of the quitters got any suggestions?????????? There are very few of us on this site who really did quit. I need some encouragement to keep quit as they say.
Thanks, Sue
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Dear Sue, this isn't immediately helpful, but I haven't smoked for over 18 months (having been an enthusiastic smoker of Marlboro) and now it just feels totally irrelevant. I just don't think about it.
I think what I mean by that is that at some point, one's brain sort of switches into another identity, i.e. "I don't smoke and I am not interested in smoking". I don't know if this might be any help for some sort of visualisation? It is a bit difficult to describe, but take it from me, I have spent a lifetime, ciggy in had, glass of wine, etc etc and could not imagine that there would ever be a time when I didn't enjoy a cig. But it absolutely does change and then you sort of think, why the hell was I so attached to that? Could have spent the money on premium grade champagne, or whatever!!
Good Luck! And yep, it's actually easy to stay quit after a certain time.
loads of love -
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Sue-61,
((HUGS))
Quitting is such a major gift to ourselves. It is hard for others to understand what a major accomplishment, and life changing choice giving up cigarettes is for us. It is a big deal and you have done an amazing job!! Only advice I can share is to be gentle with yourself when the occasional craving comes. Take it one craving at a time.
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Hello Everyone!!!!
Just wanted to say "HI" and that I love all you guys!!! I am having a tough time right now!! But I am thinking of you all!!!
HUGS-Bridget
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Hi Ladies, sorry I wasn't here to give you all support. Just finished my tournament on sat, first time no one yelled at me for a while and got a lot of thanks. And I have to thank my staff for that. Yesterday I spent the day in bed exhausted from pushing myself for days and the work on sat took it's toll. In fact, I was running around so much that the next days my legs were sore. For the ladies who are posting that they are still smoking, I am too but the fact that we are posting means we want to quit, so keep posting to keep your goal in mind. We haven't failed yet because we haven't given up. Just have to get things in line and WE WILL GET THERE!
Cleo, great that you don't have cancer, will send you positive vibes to keep it that way. Glad you are moving out of your anxiety. I have valiums and ativan which I am going to get another supply for my quit time anxieties. My quit day is July 1st. Maybe we can both quit!
Lursa, how are you doing? Is your recovery going better? If I get out that way I will try to meet you for lunch or coffee. I will give Pantufas a call now that I have time. Sending warm wishes to you.
FIfish, sorry I wasn't here for your down day. A few days before my tournament is non stop work, eat at the computer and work on something when I smoke, try to multi task as much as possible. I am glad you are venting here as we wouldn't be much of a support group without each other. I wish I could of been there to give you hugs!!! I hope that your blues will be quick but just hang in there because maybe the next hour it may pass. I think we need to find the kid within us, taking those dumb pictures helps me. I even play a joke on a couple of people and that helps too. Maybe think on our project will help or reaching out to help someone else is good. Get you out of your mind and helping always feels good. Hang in there with the side effects, we will be there with you! I sleep with the fan on me so sometimes my room is like a freezer but the times when I get a flash, it feels good to throw off the blankets and cool down. My bed looks like a tornado hit it. You can call me anytime. 303-426-5532 Sending much love!
Aka, I know how you can scare yourself silly. Good thing we are here to help each other, thank you for being helpful! I hope you are doing well and I will send you positive thoughts towards your quit smoking day.
Butterfly, so sorry to hear that you have been having a rough time. It must be very scary for you. I would definitely push things forward and the Dr's should too as timing is everything to your well being. You are young so try to think on the positive side and we will be here every step of the way. It's okay to vent and we all have to at one time or another. Surviving BC or other scary Diag also means surviving the emotional aspects which is huge. One of the main reasons for BC Butt Fondlers is to help cheer each other up because no one realize the ups and downs we go through, and this is the perfect place to find understanding women as we are there with you. I heard some Siren going off yesterday, sounded like one of those doom day movies and I was tripping out. Later I found out it was a tornado alarm and they were popping in all over the place, one not too far from my apt. Crazy hail storms but everything short lived and the sun would be out pretty quick. I hope the sun will be out for you pretty quick. Sending you sunshine days and big hugs!!!
MB, great to hear from you!! Thanks for popping in and giving your support. I hope you are well. Hoe are you doing?
o2bhealthy, hope you are doing okay with your stress. Happy to hear about your new job working out. Thanks for saving the site as a favorite. Going to start on as soon as I get caught up with my results from my last tournament. Hang in there with the urges, every cig you cut down will help you with your surgery!! Sending you positive vibes and warm wishes.
Malleme, sorry to hear that you had the blues. Wish I could of been there to give you hugs!! I totally understand wanting your life back. I just had to share this with you. One of my female competitors, an older women competed in my tournament last sat and she had breast cancer. Out of surgery a few weeks back and shows up with her bald head and a scarf and she was amazing. Jiu Jitsu is hard work and I can't believe she was out there fighting after a few weeks of recovery. Her determination to get back to life was huge. She didn't get reconstructive surgery so her healing was easier, but still, wow. I guess we all need to find some part of our lives from time to time. I think it's hard to find it with the blues but maybe if we stepped out the blues will fade faster. I do think we need to honor our feeling no matter where we are. So vent when you need to and I hope you will find your life too. Hang in there, we are with you!!!!!
Sue and Candie, congrats on your smoke free days. Thanks for posting as it really help to inspire us! Will try to join you soon! It must feel good to know that you are leaving the slavery of cigs and really becoming part of the non smoking world. I am right there with you on our sad country song and the fact that you all quit during all that show incredible strength. Thanks for your support and sharing your stories!
London, thanks for your post, it really help to inspire me and give me something to look forward to. Can't wait to be where you are!! Thanks for your support, we need it!!
Nobleanne, so glad to here from you! I am sorry to hear you are having a tough time, you can always vent here! You are not alone in whatever you are going through. Can call me anytime, 303-426-5532. I am worried about you! Sending you warm wishes and hugs. Much love!!
Pantufas, hope you are doing okay, will call you soon.
Well ladies, will think of something to post to cheer you up. Thinking of all you all the time. We will ride this rollercoaster together.
Warm wishes,
Janet0 -
Okay, we need to laugh!!!
SIGNS THAT YOU MIGHT BE EXPERIENCING MENOPAUSE
* You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. (Hot flashes)
* The person you sleep with complains about snow piling up on the bed. (Nightsweats)
* Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him. (Mood swings)
* You write post-it notes with your kid's names on them. (Memory loss)
* Your husband chirps, "Hi honey, I'm home." and you reply, "Well, if it isn't Ozzie f*cking Nelson". (Irritability)
* The phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest. (Sleeplessness)
* You find Guacamole in your hair after a Mexican dinner. (Fatigue)
* You change your underwear after every sneeze. (Mild incontinence)
* You need Jaws Of Life to help you out of your car after returning home from an Italian restaurant. (Sudden weight gain)
* You ask Jiffy Lube to put you up on a hoist. (Dryness)
* You take a sudden interest in "Wrestlemania". (Female hormone deficiency)
* You're on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendales. (Hormone therapy)
Hope this bring s a smile!!
Best,
Janet0 -
Janzin - you're hired!!!
Glad my few comments helped a bit.
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Hi London, glad I am hired! Your comments are always great so we can see the end of the rainbow!
Here's another one for you ladies. Some of you know from the past that when I run these tournaments, a few days before and the day of the event I am crazy busy. Because of that I don't have time to eat well, and the stress and lack of relax time that I may not do a number 2 for a couple of days or more. I am fermenting! Last time I gagged out my staff when loading the supplies into the van. I took credit for that beauty. This time I gagged myself while sleeping last night. With the fan on for my hot flashes, it would blow the rancid gas up to my nose and actually wake me up. So between the hot flashes and the gas, I didn't sleep well, lol. In the past when I had my dogs, one would actually growl at me and jump off the bed. Now that's pretty bad!!!!
So careful with the fans ladies!
Hugs,
Janet0 -
Did your dogs divorce you?
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Yo, techie yanks - how do I load a picture onto here? I thought you might like to see one or two holidays pics I took last week in Greece.
Tonight in London we have a whacking great thunder storm. Very dramatic.
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London, your funny! My dog was pretty silly though, made a real funny grumpy growl. Sometimes I would do one just to piss him off, fluff the covers at him too. Wonder what was going on in his mind. Maybe, "Your the one who should get locked out instead of me!" My dog would have bad ones that I made him sleep out of the bedroom. Some nights he would wake me up with farts so bad that I would almost cry.
You need to load the picture up on a server. Not sure where the free ones are but I have a few websites so I upload the pictures there and than copy and paste that url. For instance here is the url for the pictures. http://rmbjjf.com/pics/bc You can email me your pics and I will put them in that folder and send you the url if you want.
Would love to see Greece!
Best,
Janet
janetzingano@comcast.net0 -
ok...now that I am finally taking my tamoxifin..this will be my fave thread. I really need to quit!!! I will take the back seat right now. Just look for pointers and advice. Quit before for 4 yrs. Not bad. But the stress of this makes it hard. I need my cig to calm me down. Isn't there something else I could do (besides Xanax..lol) to replace this feeling??
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Dear Jules, it is only since I stopped smoking that I have come to see that thinking the fag was calming me was totally nuts - actually due to the chemicals, it was doing the reverse! it is ok (and totally smug) for me to say this as I have stopped to say this, but it is true. I do understand exactly what you are describing, because this all fills part of our identity as a smoker. As I have described in earlier posts, this all goes out the window ONCE YOU HAVE LOST THAT PERCEPTION OF BEING A HAPPY SMOKER.
So, what can we think of to help you past this? Are you someone that paces up and down nervously, full of tension, or more like me, do you tend to collapse in a heap of misery and tension? Try worry beads (or any old necklace will do) to occupy your hands.
Perhaps concentrate on that odd (and possibly not really wanted) feeling that lots of people stop smoking and lose all interest in the topic. So in a way, perhaps this is about lessening the mental picture you have that smoking is sort of vital to your identity.
I have to say, being a non-smoker isn't really an identity to me. I just don't give a f**k. I don't like the idea of sending people to the end of the garden for a ciggy if they are at a dinner party and I am never going to be one of those critical voices. I thoroughly enjoyed fags for a long time. The same as I do wine, unsuitable men and saying rude things to traffic wardens. Bah. Humbug!
All I am trying to say is, there will just come a moment when it will all be irrelevant. Also, it does save lots of money (though more so in England where cigs are about £5.50 (pounds) a pack.
I really like it that my eyes don't get sore. I used to think I spent too long on screen every day at work, but mostly it was the fags that made my eyes sore. There are obvious skin benefits.
Some people find hypnotherapy works but I didn't find it helpful.
Can you definitely not use patches or gum? It took me a lot of on and off time on patches to eventually stop, but I got there. You can too!
Actually, maybe the space for you to become an incredibly smug ex-smoker is appealing! up to you..
god luck anyway, with everything
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Welcome Jules! I think I can relate to you as I have quit for 8 years before and started again the day my ex dumped me. I sometimes think we believe we need it for stress but I sometimes think we tell ourselves that so we can still smoke. I use that line all the time but I do believe we have so much energy to deal with things every day. Such as working, relationships, stress, dieting, depression, quit smoking, etc. So it can be very hard to quit so I think we have to prepare ourselves mentally and take time off of life to focus on that one thing, quitting. Some may have it easier but for me, I will take a few days off of work or more just to use my energies on quitting and not worry about anything else because quitting is very hard for me. I started Chantix last night again getting ready for my new quit date July 1st. I am also taking valiums and activan for stress. As far as your feelings, post them here. We are here for you and this is a great place to post your fears, anger and stress and support for others. Good luck to you, sending you positive thoughts!!!
Well, time to reach out to those we haven't seen in awhile.
REKoz, Nervousknitter, 2NewBoobs, Webbie, Pantufas, Lursa. Worried about you all. Drop in a line and let us know you are okay. Miss you!!!!
Much love,
Janet0 -
Hello Ladies...WOW...thanks Janet! I NEEDED that laugh SOOOOOO much! Just wanted to drop in and say hello. My doctor is sending me to a cancer specialist...FINALLY...because we still do not have any final answers, but I am going to wait (hell I've been waiting on the damn doctors now long enough) until after my birthday, which is Friday.
I've been in a bummed out, kinda foggy mood, and ended up getting pretty, ok VERY, wild this weekend! Oh well, live and learn right? But anyway, everyone around where I live says the lady I am going to see is really very nice. So, I am hoping to have some real answers for everyone soon. I LOVE all of the support here! Keep it up ladies!
Much Love To All!
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I may try this...My mom tried many,many different techniques out there to quit smoking all through her life. She was never successful one bit...not even for and hour or more. In 2006 she was dx with lung cancer and the doc told her to take "Smoke Away".She did quit, even before bottle labeled Step 2. My mom did pass away from the cancer last year. That should have been enough to scare me in to quitting...but no. I just heard the ad on the radio last night and I think I will order some. Had forgotten about it. Maybe it can help others on here too.... God Bless everyone on here..jules
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Hello Ladies, I just talk to Pantufas and she is doing really bad. I am sooooooo worried about her that I am thinking about coming out to help her. She is still in the hospital and the antibiotics has given her grief and she is not getting better. The Dr's do not know what is going on. She had 2 chemo sessions and now they are saying that she cannot do anymore chemo. I am afraid for her and can't stop crying. She will be going for surgery soon and they are trying to build up her strength as right now they don't think she will make it. If she does she will not be able to smoke anymore. She wanted me to tell you all that she misses you and wishes all of you well and to quit smoking. If you would like to talk to her, this number goes straight to her room. 540-437-8571. She gave me permission to give this phone number to you but just don't call late at night. She is really tired but I will check in on her from time to time.
Time for huge cyber hugs and our prayers for her recovery.
(((((((((( HUGS NANCY PAT SUSAN))))))))))
Worried Janet0 -
Janzin...I don't know of pantufas..but just reading your post hit me straight in the gut and hurt..I am sooo fortunate..I did not need tx. just mastectomy..the reason I am taking my tamox. is...I feel like I can not be so fortunate if there is a recurrence. I will pray for her..my mom had the same prob. on her chemo...they had to stop it....prayers everyones way...jules
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Hi Jules, I think the not knowing what is going on is really scary. But we both know that if you are on chemo, then you need it. And now I am worried that even if she survives the surgery, she has a higher risk for recurrence. My heart just breaks. If I can get out to see her, I will delete some of this post as I will be bringing my laptop so she can catch up with you all and I don't want to scare her.
I am also soooo sorry to hear about your mom. It must of been terrible to go through all of that, and I feel your loss too. My mom has lung Cancer too.0 -
Janet,
Thank you so much for the update on pantufas. I am sending her prayers.
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Praying for Pantufas! Sending out prayer requests within my church as well!
Much Love To All!
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Hello all,
I don't see our thread up in the "Help Me Get Through Treatment" anymore. Does anyone know why?
Nevermind, it's up now.
Thanks,
Janet0 -
Janet - Thank you so much for the update on Pantufas, she has been on my mid the last few days and I have been worried (rightly so it seems). She is in my thoughts and prayers. If you do see her, please let her know we miss her and I sending her much love and gentle hugs.
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hello - I hadn't posted with Pantufas so shewon't know me but I've read some ofher posts. Please would you send my love and tnederness. thanks
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Evening ladies, thanks for all your positve thoughts for Pantufas, I will let her know and it will help cheer her up. This is hitting me hard as I have come to love all of you. You have been my sanity when I felt I was falling. I find myself crying as I am pretty much alone, work at home and spend my days with me and my cat most of the time. Funny how much you can connect over the net and how much you all can fill void and to hear what is going on with Pantufas scares me a lot.
FIfish and Malleme and the rest of you having a hard time, maybe we should get together have a mango rum cry fest. Love you all and hope everyone is recovering well.
Wishing you al the best,
Janet0 -
Janet,
I too live alone and do not work outside the home. I have been alone with my cats for a long time. It is really hard. I have a one bedroom small place now and there is no place to run from myself and my smoking. I liked it so much better when I had xtra rooms. It is beginning to get muggy here and I have the choice of putting in my new AC and quitting smoking inside or being miserable. I feel crappy tonight. Need so much to disconnect from the cigs. I have to try again.
My breast still hurts and it has stitches still from the excisional. I don't like the increased amount of time it is taking to heal. It better heal soon. My mental health is seriously being put to the test once again.
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Hi Cleo,
I know that feeling. Your world seems smaller when you are alone. Sorry that you feel crappy, me too. Ativan is starting to kick in and is helping. What do you do for work? Do you ever get out? I went for my first hike here in Lakewood, kicked my but. Almost lit up when I got to my car but then decided against it when I was huffing so hard. I thought o myself now that is just enough!!! I thought the hike would help my mental state, maybe it takes a few hikes. But it did me a little more energy. Can you walk or are you still in that careful stage. What do you do to help keep your sanity? I just work and now that I have a break, I can have time to dive into my crazy head. So I try to stay busy to limit that kind of action.
I hope you feel better and thanks for sharing. We are not alone anymore!
Hugs,
Janet0 -
Janzin - I haven't been posting lately but when I read about Pantufas I just had to respond. Please let her know that she's in my thoughts and that we miss her like hell! Keep us posted on how she's doing.
I'm still smoking so I haven't been posting much. A lot of crap going on here, but it's not important.
((((HUGS)))) to everyone!
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