Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
-
I quit smoking in 1994 after 35 years of 2-3 pack a day smoking
I did it with the patch and autogenics, but it was called something
else back then. There was a book on it. Worked for me, my MD
son uses a medication to help his patients..
0 -
OK it was called
Psyco-cybernetics
Psycho-Cybernetics is a classic self-help book, written by Maxwell Maltz in 1960 and published by the non-profit Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation.[1] Motivational and self-help experts in personal development, including Zig Ziglar, Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy have based their techniques on Maxwell Maltz. Many of the psychological methods of training elite athletes are based on the concepts in Psycho-Cybernetics as well.[2] The book combines the cognitive behavioral technique of teaching an individual how to regulate self-concept developed by Prescott Lecky with the cybernetics of Norbert Wiener and John von Neumann. The book defines the mind-body connection as the core in succeeding in attaining personal goals.[3]
Maltz found that his plastic surgery patients often had expectations that were not satisfied by the surgery, so he pursued a means of helping them set the goal of a positive outcome through visualization of that positive outcome.[3] Maltz became interested in why setting goals works. He learned that the power of self-affirmation and mental visualisation techniques used the connection between the mind and the body. He specified techniques to develop a positive inner goal as a means of developing a positive outer goal. This concentration on inner attitudes is essential to his approach, as a person's outer success can never rise above the one visualized internally
0 -
Annette...hopping on here a little later than everyone else, but liking the good advice you have been given here.
You'll find that, no matter what level of support you have from family and friends it will slowly wane. They just have not got any idea of what it is like to be trying to live a normal life and dealing with a totally abnormal situation. Some of them , just the odd ones, seem to 'get' it and will stay the course, but no matter what level of support you get from these few they can never understand what goes on in our heads, and how it can blight our everyday life. Worst of it is, we have to face the world with a grin on our faces, and so everyone thinks we 'have gotten over it' 'it hasn't been as bad as we thought' ' dealing with it 'stoically' and that once all the visible treatments cease we will be AOK, likening it to chickenpox.While inside we are going mad, unable to sleep, think, or relate to things. Some of us just go to work, do the job on auto pilot, then come home and fizzle out into a blob.
It happens to most of us. I saw 2 psychotherapists...neither much good to me, as it turned out, but we try anything. Coming here and letting out all your fears will help, because we all understand what you are going thru'. We will jump in and try and send words of wisdom to let you know you will be understood here, not judged..we have all been exactly at the point you are at today.
Listen to the gals who wrote words of wisdom here before me, and take from it ideas that will put you back onto a decent way of dealing with this. Know also, that this will be with you always, in some form for the rest of your life, and a way CAN be found to live along side this.
You'll also find that not many of us have time for 'pink'. The ones who have the biggest interest are the big companies and organisations that make big bucks on the back of this....but....ask then to help out with some of the money they make, and they don't want to know. Only a few genuine organisations that will 'give back' to those in need. (((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))
3Jays. How are you getting on ?? Thinking of you. Don't let that son of yours get to you...and don't get me started about my son !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They're all alike and know just which button to press when you're down !!!!!!!!!!!!!! But USUALLY around when you need them .
Isabella.
0 -
To marybe - yep, just outside of Houston in a little more country than city but not enough country, that is next so I can get me a horse:)My doc was upfront with me too, the smoking didn't have anything to do with it but for heaven's sake, it will cause other problems. And it is true. I have noticed that I do find myself a little out of breath on the stairs and that gets me mad! This for a woman who proudly scrambled around the mountains of Banff in my high wedge sandals! We climbed up on mountain path several years ago and when we got to the top a guy up there asked what shoes did I really wear to get up there. I assured him I ALWAYS WEAR HEELS- even on mountains:)
BarbaraA- I have heard of that both in its current and former incarnation and will try it.
Chabba- yep am ready too....was actually ready just before this. Just have to know in my heart when I go for it that it is my choice. May take me a bit...but I will get there.
SoCalLisa-it is tough quitting. I have the electronic cigarette that is kind of a toy to me. It is fun though just too heavy to be practical. May have to get another. I might have to get in touch with you SoCalLisa later in the year supposed to be in San Diego. I will give ya head's up.
Oh and the reason I am home posting is because after suiting up (so to speak-I do not really like suits and avoid them as much as I can) and heading into the office, I was struck by an apparent horrible case of nerves resulting in an unavoidable gastrointestinal (to put it nicely) "accident" - that was fun. Totally without warning when I stood up and believed it was something other than what it was. Blew the whole carefree aren't I cute in my boots and black tights and striped dress vibe I was going for....I was hiding in the bathroom while my sister ran around (she works in my office) gathering my stuff and slipping paper towels to me. It just made me laugh after I cried.
There I go again, laughing. You guys are good...
thank you so much
0 -
Laughter is good, I know a few places down there....seems there are lots of lands....my friend lived in Pearland, when I went to MDA stayed with a friend who is in the Woodlands and my exbeau's brother is in Sugarland. One of my friends used a straw to finger when she was quitting and said it helped. Me, I had to not drink coffee and couldn't go into a bar for several months since both of those were things that went along with smoking for me. Isabella, Here I was thinking maybe I should have gone to a psycotherapist as opposed to the psychiatrist route I took....all she did was have me try one antidepressant after another and I did not like the feeling of "not feeling at all" that I got with them....at least they made me feel that way, but maybe help some. I finally just decided I didnt' really have a problem, just dont like being married and need to live with it since it's his insurance that is keeping me going and I could have ended up with someone a lot worse.
My onco's office called for a second time to see how I am feeling...lst Sun AM and then again this afternoon. While I think this is extremely nice, I am starting to worry....what exactly are they expecting to happen?! Makes me think I should be wearing a crash helmut in case I topple over or something.
0 -
If any odd pics show up on threads that have not been active for awhile that have nothing to do with anything, it's because 3jays was trying to work with me today and help me with posting pics on here.....I am closer, but still not there....something to do with the clipboard not allowing me to put my pics on yahoo. She's a very good teacher, but you know what they say about old dogs and new tricks.
0 -
Hello,
I love reading all of your posts. They are so much fun and very helpful too, I want to join your "POD"". I am having a birthday tomorrow, 1/4/11 and I will be 64, so I am old enough.
Thanks
0 -
Marybe...why are you expecting to fall over???you are sooo lucky that you have a dr.that cares so much for you.Dear God I wish we all had such wonderful Drs.Remember the jerk i had who made all the mistakes on me...look how lucky you are....You my dear sista/friend are one tough lady and your dr.knows it.I think he is just checking up on you because he knows how wonderful you are.come on give him a kiss from all the sistas.ha.as you can see im in a better mood.To all my other sistas as always i wish you NED forever.hugggggggggggggggs K0
-
Welcome to the Club Cristy
0 -
Give him a kiss!! He would turn beet red and start stammering. I feel I have a really good relationship with this guy, he actually jokes with me and I am not afraid to talk to him, but most of the patients say they think he is aloof and not very personable at all. I about fell over when he gave me a hug when I gave him his Christmas gift. No, seriously, I do appreciate the fact that they have been checking up on me, but it is so out of character, that I can't help but wonder....guess I suffer from the doubting Thomas syndrome. I am glad you are in a good mood, GrannyD...good moods are contagious.
0 -
Oh 3jays, I just love the POD pix and yeah when i came on the board we were and I hope still are "The PODS." I wrote the original description of our PODS that you want to copy (I just love to brag-teehee). And to all gals, ya know for me there were just SO many expectations with the holidays-I mean cancer was a year ago and everyone thinks I should be "over it." NOT! I have major PTSD as a mental diagnosis and the BC really triggered it-when i start crying I turn into the BLOB and today, anyway, I am thankful that I can CRY!!! I used to be frozen and everything was just "fine" (F'd up; insecure, neurotic, and emotional) but being sober, I simply cannot stuff feelings anymore. In fact i am meeting with my ONC/Surg this week and asking if we 'can start over.' I had so much brain trauma with the chemo I still don't know what my pathology report truly says-i simply do not remember!! so i feel like i need to start a lot of things over again now that i can rub two brain cells together.
Pictures-ok ladies i have everything cut and getting ready to matte 8x10 pix for late xmas presents. A lot of you all want swans and i have them now-but i don't know if you want a photo of one or two swans (real close ups) or of a group of like 40 swans sitting in the sound. The birds are very visible but not like the close-ups-please PM me and let me know. I can try to email both shots so you all can see. And please, i have a gallery and do this for a living so there is plenty to go around for our group. So I need to know who wants wild horses (LIKE LISA) and who wants swans and who want historical stuff like lighthouses (LIKE AJ). It is my GIFT to all the POD-so PM me and let me know along with your address-I have several orders already but this is the last chance to get your order in.
My poor Angus doggie blew out his knee and is completely crippled and i am about to lose it. I have him on pain meds and prednizone which floors him, but he needs to be down anyway. So my dearest boy has to have knee surgery on at least one knee and maybe two (just like his mom). But crap, it is like a $1200 surgery. This little pup clung to me all thru my cancer and he doesn't complain about anything-errrgh-I just feel so awful to see my puppy hurting!! I am not good at this-people I can do-dogs and pets, I cannot do. WAAAAAAAA!!! SV
0 -
Christy....welcome and Happy Birthday, tomorrow and may you have many, many more! Please join us.
Marybe...I would probably feel the same way with the calls from your onc's staff...in myself I'd call it paranoia!! I'd wonder to myself "what am I missing?".
Granny...so glad you are feeling a little better...hope you continue to be in a better place.
Annette...that same thing happened to me today, luckily I had just gotten home from work, whipped off my coat, got to the bathroom and OOPS!! I am pretty sure it was something I ate!! You are right...the carefree just doesn't protect against those events!
Well today, I made it through 4 hours of work, had to talk to patients, staff and a lot of phone calls initiated by me...all in all it went fairly well with stammering on some words I was trying to express. After the 4 hours I was shot but I forced myself to get some lunch, go to wallyworld to get soda and cat food and do one of the things I hate most...getting gas! Then after cleaning up from the above event I slept for 2 hours. Now this has got to be the most I have done, without resting, in OVER a MONTH!! I hope tomorrow is as productive.
gentle hugs to all my POD sistahs!!!
0 -
Oh Suzie, are you recovering OK?? Any deficits? And you need to take it easy. I know it is hard being laid up on the couch for a month but don't overdo it or you will be back there!! And Christy, welcome to the PODS. We are so happy to have you here and gal' you go crazy and celebrate your B-day!! Fill us in on all the details of your celebration. Happiest B-day ever to you!! And honey, you were old enuf to join ages ago!!
And MB, I think it is amazing that the doc is calling but I'd be starting to worry too-like what are they expecting to happen?? I think I'd have to ask them-like what are you'all thinking-Like am I going to grow a second head, a third leg or what??
I LOVE the gourmet bread isle at Harris Teeter and today I bought the BEST pecan/raison bread i have ever had!! YUUUUUMMM! Big Hugs, SV
0 -
Hey everybody, another POD sister checking in tonight. (Love the Pod thing!) Welcome, Christy. Good to have you with us, and happy birthday! Started to say happy birthday tomorrow, but it already is tomorrow, isn't it?
SV, I'm sorry about poor Angus--it's so hard when our pets hurt. And the picture you posted showed him having such a good time, too. Hope you can get him fixed up and rehabilitated before too long! Sounds like a great idea to talk with onc/surgeon again, too.
Suzie, glad you had a good day--well, except for the OOPS! Marybe, sounds like you've really connected with your onc and that's great. He seems like he really cares and that's important to me. Mine is okay, but terribly young! Makes me want to pat him on his little head like a child.
Hey Grannydukes! Good to see you acting all cheerful. How're rads going? You're probably at least a third of the way through now, so hope it's going well.
I told DH I wanted an exercise bike for Christmas and damn if he didn't get one. So, now I'm forced to ride it. I've never been "athletic" at all and I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, I guess. Today I did 2 miles which was pretty good for me, just starting out. DH is actually rather sly, I suppose. He set it up in the living room facing the tv, so whenever I sit down in there it's just staring me in the face! Sorta works on the mind, you know. But, we've started a post-Christmas diet now and both of us hope to trim down a bit. One of DH's friends had to have a stint put in recently and he and DH had been off gallivanting around just the day before, so I think (hope) that was a wake-up call for DH. And me, too. Now, I've got to quit smoking. Again.
Kathy
0 -
Quitting's easy. I've done it hundreds of times.
Seriously, I wish all who are trying to quit the BEST of luck. Although, we all know it takes more than luck, you have to really want it. I smoked, started at 15. Never very heavy, like a pack a week and maybe 2 if I was partying. But when I decided to quit, I developed a method that really was easy to follow and worked. I haven't had a ciggy in over 10 years now. Lost count.
Here's how I did it... I weaned myself off. first, made myself discover the habit, studyed it, learned when and why I would light up. Then decided which one to drop off the day. Did that every day for 3 weeks and it was gone. The next one wasn't as easy. So, rather than drop it alltogether, I would thump it away before taking that last drag. then before the next to the last. throwing out a longer butt. Tried shorter cigarettes, hated them, went back to the longer butt method. 3 weeks worked good as a habit changer time. Then gave up another auto light up one. This wasn't a quickie way to quit. It took me two years and a new years eve bet with 3 other gals. I'm the ONLY one that still doesn't smoke cigarettes. So, it worked.
And that's the way it was. 1995-1998.
~Connie
0 -
so good to be here tonite, ladies. had to have yetANOTHER tooth extracted,after it broke. still, more embarrassing s/e s from chemo..bc..the gift that keeps on giving!! ISABELLA, thanks fir your friendship, and thinking of me. I,m still in major meltdown mode..but, im actively working to get hold of myself.. alot is based because of the MS.. i cant tolerate so mANY OF THE DRUGS FOR SO MANY OF THE SE'S. IM SEEING AN INTEGRATIVE dr. SOON THAT MY INS. will PAY FOR; SO; I'M CON(sorry bout caps) to fight. i get down, but i really DONT know how to give up. somedays i widh i could, but its' just not in my nature...Christy : welcome to our POD.. i really like the concept.. i don't feel like i belong much anywherebut here these days, and i appreciate the group here is so loving!!i can;t go to some of the other threads, they're too confrontive etc. for my liking.. I also want to wish you a very happy Birthday, CHRISSY.. your first one in the POD!!!Chrissy B.. if you can help MARYBE.. you helped me so much; i tried to pay it forward, but only got so far.. she needs to install allow clipboard acess; but we have different systems, so i got lost there..
what a wonderful liife we have, in spite of the BEAST.. i have such good friends i 've made here, because? in spite of her!!now ..SV: i absolutely love ya girl.. but ya gotta take it easy!! now, poor angus is showing you he needs to act his age, too!! i'm so sorry about his knee. you sound like you have a good vet, and you'll get him fixed up! i kMONUMENTAL.. as stubborn as we all know you are.. sighnow how much our beloved pets give to us.. my little boy, all 5lbs. of him is still protective of me. he spends quality time in bed with me. i just don't know how i'd get on without him!! GOOD for you, girl, for getting a "do over" with the onco. that yu realised you needed one, and asked for it;{{{{sigh}}}} we can't erase the things that have happened, but we can change the things we CAN!!and, my fav. food was icecream when i finished chemo. but its' now raisin bread.. warm from the oven, buttered.. and, i even put the gooey frosting on myself; sometimes that's a whole comfort food i save for bad days..CONNIE: i never did the elect.ciggies.. i tried it, it just reinforced the whole hand to moth; taking a drag for me. My ??DR, suggested the take the # down a wk.. etc.. but they really freaked out about the smoke smell at chemo; so it was extra motivation for me. i went to a hypnotist, and he helped with the whole nausea part of chemo 1st; and then we went on with the smoking thing. 1st it was no smoking in the house, then no coffe and cigs.. i got to use the gum. can't do patch, ive had mult. strokes... i haven;t partaken iin over a year; but still need the nicotine gum. onco says nicotine's not the problem.. its the smoke to the lungs. i've even lessened the amt of nicotine in gum; and how long apart they are now.. its; really hard. its; worse than herion, someone who would know, tells me. Good kuck. remember; if you slip, its' just a slip, and keep right on going o what you were doing...
i just LOVE my POD sistahs..thank you for being here for me! 3jaysmom
0 -
Hi all and welcome 1Christy! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! for tomorrow. Hope you have a WOW! of a day and get spoilt like all good girls should!
Hey 3jays I'll be very happy to help Marybe if I can. I don't mind the time given.
Oh SV your poor fur baby! I agree, people I can handle pets? no way. I just feel so helpless with them. Hope your baby gets back on his knees real soon with no pain. Oh, I'd love the swan with wings out if possible please.
Granny! wow! you are sounding good! It's about time......you've had a real hard road for quite a while so I'm really happy to hear you being upbeat!
Lisa, how's the voice? Found it yet? I hope so cause there's nothing worse than not being able to talk when you want to....lol for me, that's most of the time......lol.
To all the other girls here, have a great day!
Love n hugs. Chrissyb
0 -
Welcome, Chrissy. Aw SV so sorry about Angus. Poor baby. Suz, good for you, getting back to work. HUgs for MB and GD. MB may this tx be easy on you and GD may rads be easy on you. Kathy, good on you with the exercycle! And 3jays, I feel a road trip coming on. We are going to Naples to a barbeque Sunday. Man, only 1-1/2 hours away. Maybe we can swing it. Let me work on that.
0 -
Hey ChrissyB-did you send me your address?? I have not got thru the list let alone printed it out yet so I don't even know who is on there unless they are in front of my face and names on paper!! if you have not sent me your address, please PM me!!!!! I am dashing about today trying to get a few errands done-unfortunately the dashing hasn't quite kicked in, despite several cups of coffee and i am still stuck to the couch!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTY!!! I am just so worried about my little angus-the roids have him so zonked-he cannot move when he is on them which is probably a good thing. But i have to go and lay with him cause he is such a Mommy's boy and he doesn't understand why his ass won't work. my other springer Mandy (she passed at age 18) had the same thing happen and they had to 're-hang and rehinge' her knee-with fishing line no less #50 pound test-which is the material they usually use on doggies-but it is a long gig after surgery. SO i am trying not to think about it all. XXOO, SV
0 -
hey ladies..BARBARA let me know..would love to get together.SV so sorry 'bout your baby..they really don't unferstand when they're hurt; so, they look to us.. fishing line Gakk..well if it works...will be thinking of you, and your baby.. 3jays0
-
SV 0 -
Awwww....SV, I'm so sorry about your puppy! Poor baby....him and you! I would lay down with him, too. I know he has a huge healing process ahead for him - and you, again - but take it one day at a time and you can deal with it. How did he bust his knee? Oh gosh, I can't wait until you get this done!
I totally forgot I have an appt with my BS next week! Do they just keep us going forever? I guess I do have a few questions - like I threw a football as far as I could the other day, and it hurts now! DUH! I'm so competitive!
Okay, I was flipping through the posts and got stuck on that pecan/raisin bread, SV! I don't even know where a Harris Teeter is around here, but I guess I'm glad I don't. Trying to do a detox here after just finishing up chemo and rads and I doubt that bread would be on the program. mmmm....maybe in another 26 days I'll go find a dang Harris Teeter!
0 -
AWWWW-3jays that is so cute!! And why do you all live in FLA.?? I want to come and play too!! But thik i will be on doggy duty for awhile. Barb A, you and your road trips-good on ya though with gas prices-man up to $3.30 here- don't know how you do it. Are you married to a rockstar?? I watched that new show twice and OMG what a bunch of skanks and hookers those rock star wives are-do they have any idea how ridiculous they look? Do they even know they look like that?? i mean the "Barbie-Doll Make over" one with the triple E boob job has a lifesized doll made of herself for her hubby to play with while he is touring-and she thinks this is like for real-she talks to it and keeps dragging it around, along with herself to show it to her hubby-ok BARB A. fess up, where is the doll you had made of yourself???? holy crap-if I had a portion of the money these gals seem to have-how do they do it-I mean these women truly are at the top of the skank list worldwide!!!! I used to see these gals in Aspen when I was 'dating' a certain dude and was a size 2 and gorgeous-he had committment issues!! oh well, so much for my past life!! I don't know how that rant got started-crikey! love you all lots and lots and HEY, I was actually born in Florida but it was by accident-not that I was born though beginning to wonder, but that Mom was in Tampa-supposedly on an island off of Tampa in a hospital full of nuns in the long black robes. Dad says they were all swinging their rosary beads by the time I delivered. my Mom was about 112 pounds and I was 9.8 of those-owwwweeee-They had to use salad tongs to get me out so all of my baby pics have me with a huge "V" on my forehead. Smooches, SV
Santy is tightly clutching my arms cause I DO remember trying to pull his beard off-hence the look and some long explanation about elves!!
And I just had to add this of me at Xmas:
Santy Claws my A$$!! Who the Freak are you and why am I here??
)))) SV he looks like he needs aother shot a' something!0 -
SV, you definitely don't look like you are having a good time in that picture
so much for Santa...
0 -
I didn't like the white bearded dude either. He always smelled like sen-sen (and my grandpa).
0 -
In a bit of a rush tonight , so this will be short.
Welcome Christy, and Happy birthday, today..you're an old biddy now !
SV sorry about Angus. I am the reverse of you...NOT a people person, but VERY much an animal person. Can relate to them 100 times better than people. And the 'salad tongs' NOT NICE I had those things to get DS out, and they HURT.
Granny so nice to see yo cheerful again...hope it'll last.
Suzie pleased things are doing OK back at work.
Kathy ride 'em cowgirl ! My bike lasted about 2 weeks then I sold it quick !
3Jays. Thinking of you you have so many extra problems than most of us here, I admire the way you plod on.
I am starting a new regime, trying to get to bed before midnight....but it won't last I will only start playing on my laptop and get clicking away instead of trying to get to sleep earlier. Have had a very busy day, nothing in particular, but lots of running around. Buying clothes for my 2yr old G/daughter,its her B/day this w/end. BIG party, but NOT buying toys, she was inundated at Christmas. Got 3 prs pj's 2 prs of jeans, a dress, some sneakers and some undies. I love to buy for her. Like to see her looking good, little madam ! Trouble is DD will NOT iron anything, and things soon look a mess. I have to try and catch her ironing when I go see her. DD is also very good at throwing everything in washing machine altogther, so things tend to change colour now and then....I read her the riot act,she tells me I am 'too fussy', I get mad at buying clothes only to see them getting ruined....but I still carry on doing it.
Isabella.
0 -
Yeh, he grabbed and held my arms cause i DO remember pulling his beard down and going what the frig is this about?? And they could not get a shot of me on Santy's lap. Even then i was beyond reality..... somewhere in the existential realm!! And Isabella, yeah, my poor Mom-how in the world did they fit all of that stuff in there. I mean i was before crowning and really stuck i guess. she was only about 5 foot 2 inches and in her 'anorexic' stage-weighed 89 pounds usually!! Skin and bones and that was without me hanging around in there. I was trying to get out cause there wasn't any room!! XXOOO SV
0 -
OK where did everybody go?? Was my Baby/Santy photo over the top??? Sorry, just being a board hog again!! XXOOO, SV
0 -
I love your Santa photo SV. It is a classic! Yor coat is a classic and your hat to, it has a yarn pony tail on the back, yes? This Santa is one of the most realistic I have ever seen in my life.
Me I went to the Radiologist yesterday and I am very pleased with him and his staff. He spent a long time going back over my diagnosis and lab results and explained things I never knew about. I go back today for planning session, Cat scan, didn't have one before. Measuring and tattooing, and scheduling.
My Doc is a friend of Melissa the founder of this BCO board. He was happy to hear I liked it so much and found it so very useful.
Sorry you hare having mets probs AmyJo. Pain is hard on us in so many ways. I will keep you in my prayers.
Hugs everyone
Ginger
0 -
Isabella, I thought I was the Queen of messed up sleep! I now have been paying attention when I have that period of sleepiness around nine or ten and just go off to the bed room, turn on the TV and doze off. As a result I awAKEN MUCH EARLIER AND THEN AM MORE TIRE THE NEXT EVENING REINFORCING MY SLEEPINESS. Sorry about the caps. It is a life long struggle for me and this method seems to work best.
I am getting a Poodle Standard puppy in March. Next dog will be a Cavalier King Charles for sure. I LOVE dogs. Capitals were intentional that time!
lATERS
giNGER
0
