Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Chevy, I am glad you and your dd are okay. Watch for any stiffness in the next week or so.
Kaara, good news on your mammogram and eye stability. Good luck with the house selling and move.
Carolhalst, I love mcdonalds shakes. I only have one every so often but would love to be able to have one each day!!!
I have not been on for a while. Started new job as prek teacher instead of the director of a preschool. Love it. Normal hours every day and no hassle with 12 other ladies is great.
Have a great weekend!
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Well, got back my computer to the tune of $200, not a good time for that bill, but next week is payday, I hope. Beautiful day here today, we had a nice shower last night it is cool and breezy.
Have been tierd today, trying to get done what I can. CLR'd shower but it did not due much good. Our water has alot of calcium in it. I bought a stiff brush on a long handle as I can not get down on my knees anymore. I can get down but getting up is the problem. I also took the brush and some carpet cleaner and cleaned up the little carpet we have in the living room, it looks much better.
Going to grill burgers for dinner, or maybe just a hamburger steak and some vegies.
Have a good weekend.
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Termite, good to have you drop in. Glad your new job is much less stress than the old one.
I need to make a TO DO list, too. Then I need to DO the things on the list!
This morning I attended a cooking class and had such a good time. The teacher was an older man from Italy who has had restaurants in various cities in the US. He gave us recipes for gnocchi and a basic pasta recipe. He also made various sauces. We had the gnocchi with two different sauces and also had cannoli and ravioli.
I wish he had mixed up and formed the gnocchi and pasta himself, but he offered to let any of six ladies in the class do hands on with him instructing. One woman jumped up and we had to watch her inexpert efforts. The kitchen is in the back of a very nice store called Simplee Gourmet that has wonderful kitchen stuff.
Now I'm back home and dh is watching LSU and Georgia battle it out on the football field.
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Hello,I am new here..dont know much about this but I will give it a try..not a good speller either..have BC.60 years old..feel scared but I know and hope every thing goes ok..
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Welcome to Breastcancer.org, Flatland! Fortunately spelling doesn't count here.
Jump right in with any questions or concerns you have - this is a great group for support and advice. The main Breastcancer.org site is a good resource too, with thousands of pages of searchable, medically-reviewed info.
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Welcome, Flatland! Don't worry about spelling. We have one woman we tease about her spelling, but it's all in fun and she teases right back. Sounds like you were recently diagnosed? It's bewildering at first because so much info comes your way and you have to make decisions. Don't worry, we'll hold your hand thru it all.
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Hi Flatland, Welcome, not a place anyone wants to be but you will find alot of support here. I am 64 and was diagnosed in 2011, I Got through Chemo OK, and radiation. Have had some problems since with chemo brain, etc. getting better. Everyone will tell you to find the new you, it is not easy but is can be done. Glad you are here.
Where are you from?
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Flatland, welcome to the Older Women's Forum. Glad you found us though we'd rather this be a quilting bee or something like that. Still, if we must have this diagnosis and tx. its wonderful to be in a group that understands and is willing to hold your hand without qualification. Come back often. I was diagnosed in 2007 and had my treatments in 2008..........now I just hang around to try to lighten the load for anyone coming here...........just like mine was for me.
Love and peace
Jackie
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Oh? We have a NEW gal! Yay! So "flatland"....I'll bet you are from Kansas, or Nebraska, or somewhere I don't know about! Which could cover most of the U.S. or even beyond!
If you misspell something, we wouldn't even know the difference! So we don't care. Miss Cammitrystospell is among us, and we wouldn't even understand her if she spelled everything right. So no probs!
So what are you doing? Just diagnosed? Waiting for surgery? We've all been there, done that, so we can help you with anything! We can help your golf game, talk about road-trips in an RV, show you how to make brooms...and raise chickens.... Ha! Well actually I don't RAISE chickens, my neighbors do.... I just take them treats and take their eggs.
And don't feel scared... That will go away. Well, we all did.... so we know how you feel. But every day that goes by, will mean one more day past that feeling of helplessness and "will I be okay".....
So see? You are safe here..... well not with me, exactly, but with all these other gals.... Not even Cammi.... you'll see....
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What do we live for, if not to make life less difficult for each other?
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Welcome Flatlands! this is a great group of ladies. They will answer all questions and help you along the way. This is a great site. You can just read each entry, write, or ask questions. Where are you from?
I am 64, from Illinois about 40 miles from chicago and was diagnosed in 2010, had a lumpectomy, mammosite and chose no chemo.
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
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Hi, Flatland. This is a great place to hang out and share the health experiences you hoped you would never have. I was diagnosed with bc in 2009, had a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction and no chemo or radiation thanks to a low oncotype score and no lymph node involvement.
For about a year I thought of little else except ME and breast cancer and healing from surgery and trying to return to normal. I was doubtful that I would ever feel "normal" again. It was good communicating daily with other women on bc.org who were going through some of the same emotions. No one else on the "outside" really understood, no matter how loving or concerned.
You are most welcome here.
I was up at 7:30 and started peeling potatoes. I made potato salad, macaroni and cheese, baked chicken thighs, and green salad for noon dinner at my mother's house. Everything was good. My mother had five people for company today other than dh and myself. My oldest brother and his dh, one of his sons and the son's dh and 8-yr-old daughter. We had a good visit.
My brother and his wife brought paper plates and styrofoam glasses so that we didn't have to wash the dishes. They also brought a chocolate chip cookie cake for dessert and it was delicious.
Tomorrow DH and I have an apptment at the post office to apply for renewing our passports. We have a big trip to Australia and New Zealand in January. The government will probably shut down and delay the whole process.
About Camille's spelling. I thought she was an immigrant when I first started reading her posts! I read her name as Cam-illegal! I thought maybe she was in the country illegally! I am not kidding! Then someone called her Camille and a lightbulb went on. Camille-gal. As time went on, I realized she had her own shorthand for the English language. I have no problems understanding her posts and LOVE her sense of humor.
Hope everyone had a good weekend.
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Hi everyone.....I could have waited until tomorrow for this, but the minute I ran across it.....I thought of some of our friends here who have had some struggles......no matter when they occurred. The minute I read it.....I felt a little better about a couple of things I've worked with recently.
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WelcomeFlatland---U will enjoy talking with the gals here and talking about u feelings and frustrations and what needs to be done. We've all been in this ans some still are so we''ll help u anyway we can.
EEEXXXCCCUUssee me ladies I can read u know. LOL
Termite I'm so glad u have anither better job and feeling good.
Jackie u said u had to clean u'r yard, with the leaves and nuts--I din't know chevy lived there.
Carole u'r brave leaving this Country now--we're not a popular group u know.
I had a wonderfult time at my Borthers BD party last nite, great food, fun family people and just pain great. and when I got up after dinner to go to the bathroom--I went--right yhere, yes where I was standing, my diarrhes happened. My sister sees my face and right away got behind me and we walked like 2 of the mMarx brothers to the restroom---Oh it was horrible and all we could do was laugh--my one brother's GF got to really know us and we told her this is the family now how u've seen before--she didn't quite understand how we could be laughing but she joined in. But other than that I had a great time. Just feel icky today--or did I tell u all this before I don't remember--if I did just ignore this part but don't ignor about CHEVY BEING A NUT,
Carole u'r so funny u thhought I didn't know English--where did u thing I came from--Oh that's a new one for my typing. No wonder the Governors office called my DD to say I was mentally inbalanced. BTW u do such fun things==u'r so interesting and
Jackie u are always so positive and caring all the time.
Chevy on the other hand steals eggs, I know that a misdameanor, but it still counts. She;s sleeping now so I'm safe.
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As usual I am late in posting. Had a good day. I got up this morning and we were going to church. After I started breakfast I told DH I wanted to drive to Big Bend, Terlingua, Lajatis, Presidio, so we did. We had not been down there since 2007. We drove from Terlingua to Presido taking the river road. It is such a beautiful drive. We found a place we had not previously pulled into and it was an overlook to the rio Grande and was called balanced rock, all these rocks balanced onto each other. Took some pics but have to reinstall my software before I can down load them. We drove over 300 miles and were only in two counties of Texas. The area really intriges me. We did not go to Big Bend National Park this time, will do it again in the near future.
At 3:30 we stopped in Presido and had a plate of nachos at at resturant we had been to several time. When we got home around 6 I fried up some chicken, had leftover coldslaw and sliced tomatoes. Was a good day that we needed away from all the ho hum chores.
Take Care
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Mommarch what a beautiful Sunday u and u'r DH had--it's good to just get up and go and enjoy. 399 miles is a lot but in TX I don't think it is. LOL
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"How do we nurture the soul? By revering our own life. By learning to love it all, not only the joys and the victories, but also the pain and the struggles." —Nathaniel Branden
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I think we lost her! Flatland hasn't been back! And here we are so welcoming and acting all sane and everything! You would think she would find us do-able?
Cammi! I am NOT asleep.....Ha! I heard you! Besides, I only get eggs that are given to me...by their "Mom" or I figure when they LAY them, and no one else is THERE, they are giving them to ME!
And WHAT? I live in Jackie's yard? With the nuts? SEE? Who would have thunk? Yes leaves! They are flying all over here.... and get this! It's supposed to SNOW Friday! HERE! We have had our furnace on, with these cold mornings! I kind of like it though.... I'm just tired of working in the yard...I'm ready to relax and wait for Winter.
By relax, I mean sorting through my clothes, and donating the ones I don't want, and cleaning out my closet, cleaning out under the sink, which is always stuffed with grocery bags, that I hate to throw away.... but those things GROW! They breed, right before your eyes! I have to start taking in the re-cycle bags of which I have thousands, to ALL the stores! I also got 3 pairs of my slacks hemmed yesterday. By hand. And mopped the kitchen floor with diluted Murphy's oil soap.... It sure looks nice.
Mommarch! I can remember pictures of my Mom, when she was young, posing by the Balanced Rocks! That must be the same place where you were? She lived in Dallas, Ft. Worth, and Amarillo.... before she came to Denver.
Carole... That sounds like so much fun! I have one gal-friend that loves to travel all the time! She belongs to this group that used to be called Elderhostile... and has been renamed Road Scholar.... But she could choose any of the trips they offered. Her Husband had passed away, and they had always traveled together, but she finally tried it by herself onetime, and has been doing it alone, ever since!
It is so much fun to look at all her pictures she saves, and hear about the different cultures of the people she has seen. She has been all around the world! AND, I am so excited for her, because she now has a "friend!" SHE sounds like she is on cloud-9 when she talks about him....!
"It is just a sweet-caring, loving relationship" she has with this MAN! He is widowed, and they both volunteer together at this place, so they have known each other for quite awhile...but I'm just happy that she is having so much fun.... together! She has met his family, but who knows what will happen with this.... She does NOT want to sell her home, or move, and how different would it be to have someone move in with YOU?
But I'm sure they will figure it out.... but good for her... She is my age...we went all through school together... and he is even OLDER... (If that's possible...
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Chevy he's older than u--wow that's pretty good to make it that age. But I like to hear people experiencing life after their partner passes--knowing how precious life is and they can still enjoy it.
Yep I think we lost her--why do we loose people Chevy --u thibk it's us??? Everyone is so nice and caring here, and we ll understand any and every feeling u can possibly have. Well if she feels like coming back we will welcome her always.
ooo I have to call and make another Dr;s app't today for another Dr. And I forgot when I went to the Dr last week she asked me when do I see the card, and of course I said why. her answer was u do have a heart problem hahaha I said I knew that and I take meds so I ha e to see him again? She just roled her eyes and said yes. I hate Drs. Well I'd better do what I need to do, I gess. But then again Monday it's always crazy on the phones Oh wel I'll see.
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Yes Cammi.... He is 80! But his pictures look great! She tells me everything.... like personal stuff.... like he can't take Viagra.... but it doesn't matter to her..... she just loves to snuggle, and be his special gal. He is so polite to her! And always picks her up to take her to Dinner! I think it's because he IS older, and appreciates women, and knows how to treat them....
DD got a check today for her car that she got smacked into! So now she has to get estimates on how much and where to go.... but I was surprised they came out so fast!
And if I could just get over these stomach cramps, and diarrhea, I would be happy! WTH? I had this last month! But I fixed fried Calamari, and hamburger/cabbage/onion rolls in those fresh tortillas, that you have to "cook!" Couldn't eat much, but it was good.... always leftovers...
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Oh someone's a little touchy today--no names mentioned, but it's some kind of car--- I think what u'r friend found is perfect =A man who u have dinner with, converstion, company and no sex---who could ask fr anything more??? But alot of 80 yr olds look really good and a lot of fun.
So what can it hoit. I'm sorry u'r tummy is exploding with all that stuff---it's a terrible and tiring feeling. Don't eat so many eggs. or at least hard boil them.
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White foods are best when you have a "boiling" tummy. They are more digestible which means easier going down etc. Hope that doesn't last long. Thinking of you.
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Jackie u'r so sweet.
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Morning gals.... Jackie, those "cramps" are just like the ones we used get when we had a period! And they came like every 20 minutes, but now they are gone! It was a "bug"....I think. And yes, my Mom used to make my Brother and I warm milk-toast with butter when we were kids....
Cammi, you mentioned before about why do gals leave us.... I think they forget how to "find" us, on these threads.... At least I did, when I was new. So I stalked her, and sent her a PM, and a link to this thread.... I KNOW we didn't say anything, or DO anything, DID we? Or you?
Well, YOU might have, but I was too miserable to do it.
So I had that wrap.... 1/2 of one, and I got better...Ha! We are supposed to get SNOW Thursday and Friday! Can you beLIEVE it? I don't think I can.... Maybe it will only rain.... I will keep you all updated!
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If u get snow I want pictures.
Chevy i thought we were pretty good that day. But maybe not who know/
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Chevy, I was served milk toast when sick. To this day I hate warm milk and soggy toast. I do drink latte's occasionally, but with a lid.
We have snow in the mountains here. Not down to the lower pass, but a trecherous road on Mt Baker is closed for the winter.
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Hi group,
I've been reading your posts for the past couple of days and thought it's about time I quit lurking and come out from behind the bushes. I'm Sandra, 64, from San Antonio. I was diagnosed with high grade DCIS in one breast and am 5 weeks out from a double mastectomy with reconstruction (implants) and 3 weeks out from surgery #2 to remove one implant, remove tissue that didn't survive, and put in a tissue expander. Just got the last drain out last Thursday but I still have a PICC line (because of IV antibiotics) so showers still aren't easy. I dream of the day when I can jump back into the backyard pool. (It's hot enough here until November sometimes.) My husband of 43 years, Mike, is an absolute angel. He has been retired for 5 years but says his job is to take care of me now. I had a moderate brain stem stroke earlier this year and have problems with balance and eyesight. A month later I was diagnosed with a large anuerysm in the ascending aorta of my heart which will require open heart surgery. Then came the breast cancer diagnosis. God and I aren't on speaking terms. Three life threatening things in 6 months? What did I do to piss him off so badly?
I had no problem deciding on bilateral mastectomy in spite of friends who couldn't understand why I would want to "cut off a perfectly healthy breast" or medical personnel who treated me like an old foggie who hadn't heard that "studies show that lumpectomy is all that is needed for DCIS." I couldn't deal with having to worry that they wouldn't get it all with a lumpectomy or that cancer would show up in the other breast. Take them off. I don't need them anymore. Fortunately my surgeon agreed with me and was totally supportive. Good thing...pathology showed LCIS in what we thought was a healthy breast. It was missed on two mammograms and a pre op MRI of both breasts. I see an oncologist next week. My surgeon tells me I won't need chemo or radiation since the cancers were an agressive kind but were small, found early, and dealt with agressively. Hopefully the oncologist agrees.
So this has been a tough year. I am blessed to have a wonderful husband who couldn't be more supportive. I have lost several friends - they just faded away. Some others are showing fatigue...being around somebody who has one problem after another is tiring. I found a therapist who has helped me understand how others deal with illness so I'm not feeling so abandoned. She has also helped me work through the depression over having to quit my job, apply for social security early so that benefits are permanently reduced, and see plans for this part of life disappear because of finances. Not to mention worry that I could have another stroke. Call me Debbie Downer. No wonder some friends aren't there anymore. I try to be positive but it isn't working too well. Maybe after I recover from these surgeries, I'll be able to get past the fear and worry.
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Oh Sandrainthebushes! Welcome to this group! Don't pay any attention to what anyone else THINKS! It's hard enough to go through this, on OUR terms, never mind what others think we should do! My oldest Daughter wanted me to ALSO have a double-mastectomy. Just because that's what SHE would do, and because she said she would rather have a Mom, than lose me, thinking cancer would take over.
It didn't! YOU have been through life-changing things in your life, but you are still here! I don't think I will call you "Debbie-Downer".... Because we have ALL gone through so much more than most women. I had a little stroke in my brain-stem while taking a medication, and lost my hearing! Probably wouldn't happen to MOST women, but it did me! So I said a few choice nasty words rather loudly to myself, and blaming the MEDS and the cancer and everything else..... But that was about 1 1/2 years ago, and you just go on!
Sure, we might have another stroke, or if I get one more hammer-toe I will just SCREAM!
Sounds like you have a good "team".... You have people helping you, and a Husband that cares! So never mind what anyone else thinks! We're all here for you.... so that's your good talking to for the day....Ha! Take good care!
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Sandra so glad you decided to show yourself. Count me in too......I as well had a brain-stem stroke. Seems to be the thing, huh !!!! That came a few years before the cancer. It was a long, slow process working my way out of that.......but I'm here. In fact.....though not as close as yours......I had three very life changing medical events.... with cancer being the last one. It is difficult to fit these events into your life. After all.......I'm sure none of them were placed in our game plan by us.
People do find it hard to keep up when we seem a bit needier --- but I think it is mainly relative. They can't comprehend it well because it didn't happen to them. We lived it.........and it is hard to feel you have become un-important to those whom you likely shared a fairly strong relationship with for a fair amt. of time.
There is a great quote that goes something like.....what do we live for, if not to help each other get through life. I don't really know....but since we have all lost people from our lives.....I think it might be likely that the common denominator is the cancer diagnosis. Almost no one actually agrees with me, but I have always felt that a lot of people have trouble because secretly they are so glad its you and not them. Due to that I feel like they lose most of their ability to be around us in a comfortable way.
Whatever though......knowing this, we all tend to stay here and help those who come along because someone got us through.....let us cry, let us rant, let us question.......and loved us un-conditionally no matter what shape we were in at the time. It is why we all keep coming.
I hope you have a wonderful day and don't be a stranger.
Peace and love
Jackie
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Welcome Sandra, I am also 64 and live in Fort Davis, TX. There is nothing easy about any of this, but as Chevy says you just go on. I worked all through my treatment and then 6 months after my final chemo the chemo brain really kicked in. Finally on Feb. 28th, 2013 I left my resignation letter in my directors chair, and walked out. I had had enough of her crap. It is a horrible feeling not to be able to think, find the words, etc. It is getting better. You have came to the right place for support. I also found that friends disappeared. My best friend since childhood has and is there for me. My DH, DD, & GD were here for me. DD & GD lived with us at the time. DH only missed one appointment. He still is very good and understands when I just do not feel like doing something. A big hug to you.
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