Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Although many of us probably didn't get a thorough education in the value of a positive attitude, we can teach ourselves. Simply by making a decision to look for the good, happy, and beautiful in all things and all people, you will have completed the first and most important step in learning to accentuate the positive.
Sue Patton Thoele0 -
I've had 4 of 12 weekly Taxol treatments after 4 bi-weekly A/C infusions. I think my deep funk is mostly frustration and annoyance - I'm tired of being tired and I'm tired of not being able to taste anything. And now I have a bad cold. bummer. Oh, well, there's football games to watch today so I can be a slug today without too much guilt.
BTW, I go "au naturel" with my bald head and have been called "sir" only twice.
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I love the caring here ( Chev's post to Jangela ) and it is such a huge part of why I come everyday. It is so soothing to know that there is an army ( not too big mind you ) of great souls who care about others. Though it is over the Internet....it is so beautifully genuine.
Having said that.....I think the caring came first and while unfortunate that it had to happen this way.....we get to use that faucet of our character endlessly here hoping to smooth a path, create a smile, or just give someone that sensation of peace that they are not "losing" it some way. The bottom line is LOVE is always the answer.
Oh my --- no sun today and our rather nice temps are taking a dive. Back to winter again....though I don't think there si any snow or anything like that coming. Just cold, somewhat sun-sunny so dreary hours to fill.
That won't be hard. We were having some phone service issues...just the modem which we have through Charter. Thought we had worn it out, but turns out that all was interconnected with the electric issues that were plaguing as well. Fortunately, we have a friend who lives quite close to us ( very good electrician ) and he came over yesterday and set us to rights once more. Well, you know what happens when something like that gets going. You move furniture that has sat in place for a good length of time --- not moved because if has become a platform to stack things on....sigh !!!!!! Between all the stacked items that should have been dealt with long ago and dust bunnies the size of a small horse....there is lots to do today.....tossing, sorting, moping underneath and otherwise getting things to actually be what they should have been......which would have made having an electrician here a lot easier for everyone.
Sandra....what fun to "hook" someone on something good. Bonus point.....the daughter you adore. Just special and a true treasure to love and appreciate.
All the talk of books and I think I'll have to dig some come of the few I have and actually read them. I hate to admit I started a couple and never kept up. I think with half a chance.....I could be right there again.
Hope you all have a wonderful Sunday.
Blessings to all
Jackie
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Mary that's great u can go topless, a warmer climate can help that tho--when u'r in Chicago it's way to cold, it's amazing how hair can keep u warmer, I never knew that before. After all it's just hair.LOL
Oh Miss Chevy I was a little to young for the "pettycoats" but I do remember them and the teenagers all had a poodle on their skirt. My sister didn't waer them, (she was the real slut) she'd wear those pencil skirts, which are again popular but she had this tiny little body and she showed it off. Well u can relate to that I'm sure.) the slut part)
OK I have to take a shower this morning, why does it have to be such a big deal for me--it never was before-it was just part of my morning, now it just seems like so much crap, but when I'm all done I smell so wonderful it's like magic. (shut up Chevy)
I can't seem to catch up on my body resting. I feel like I'm so weak and tired, sometimes I just think it's my pain that wears me out so easily and I'm old that's probably it, I want to feel like I did before BC hahaha I thought I would. Oh well I should be used to it by now, but every so often I get moody about it. My Card called yesterday he wants to see me Friday. Geeze I said I didn't want to be bothered with any Drs. til January and he just swooped down and made it right away. A$$.
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MaryFox good to hear from you. I do understand the tiresomeness of chemo txs. Though you are helping your medical/oncology team to do necessary things to save your life and get you back to a "normal" state, it can be a bit off-putting and discouraging. I did go through a similar period ( fairly long time ago now ) where it seemed nothing would ever taste quite right again and the aches and pains and all-over disturbed sickish feeling seemed to have an awfully strong foot hold.
At one time I distinctly felt bad enough that I questioned going on. I don't tell that often -- it is almost scary to me now, but just saying that I can identify with things that can get overwhelming with the arduous need of a longish tx. period. I had 6 mos. of chemo --- ( Adriamycin and Cytoxin ) followed by ( Taxotere ) and what I can say is that when I finally felt done ( all se's effects --especially interior bodily ones ) with my taste returned and aches and pains in their proper place......I looked back on what I had come through with such credulity and in fact admiration for myself. I was so proud of getting over the I can't do this anymore hump.
That is what I so hope for you. I hope you might feel as I did later on......that giving up 6 mos. of my life for chemo was so worth it. If fortunate we have a good life before diagnosis.....and if also fortunate, a rather longish time to the credit side.....so viewed that way, 6 mos. is such a short, short time, though it can feel so much longer while going through it.
During my worst times.....I kept telling myself, just ten minutes. Anyone can get through ten minutes. I had a whole lot of ten minute days. When I felt the worst I would just promise myself not to let any negative thought turn up, and I would see how I felt when the ten minutes was up. Save for just once ( my give-it-up day ) I would decide each time the ten minutes was up, to wait for the next ten.........and finally, it was bed time.
The one thing that likely saved me was that ( knock on wood big time here ) I am a champion sleeper. Sleep is now we heal and rejuvenate, and though by the end of the day and my ten minute segments I felt totally exhausted --- I went to bed and to blissful, healing sleep. As much as you could heal anyway. The next day.....I was ready to fight again.
All of us here have won or will be winning and we are your cheer-leaders.
Blessings to you,
Jackie
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Chevy ... Petticoat Junction ... cute show ... I love how the mention of old shows brings back forgotten memories
MaryFox, here's hoping your football teams win today ... unless they are playing the Steelers.
Jackie, I know what you mean about dust bunny surprises when one moves furniture that's been in place "a while." I'm thinking it's time to move the king size air bed with air pumps and night stands ... but not today.
Cami, although I had starched petticoats, I also wore slim wool sheath dresses with 3 inch heels. The wool sheaths with heels were standard attire at the fall homecoming dance in my high school. I am wondering if the two styles coexisted or the petticoats were followed by the sheaths.
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Jackie, thank you for sharing your "10 minute plan."
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Hi ladies,
I hope everyone enjoyed Christmas day. We had family together except one son and family that lives out of state. Miss them so much.
Rabbitvelve, I agree with you about washing clothes and folding them. It is relaxing and love the fresh smell right out of the dryer.
Maryfox, I hope you are feeling better. I feel we all go through those funks sometime during our treatments but it does get better.
Jangela. I hope you are doing better.
Chevyboy, I remember the crinolines. I wore them under a party dress, but my two older sisters wore them, the pencil skirts and poodle skirts and very tight jeans that my dad would make them go back to their room and change.
Sandra 4611, it sounds like you are really enjoying your visit with Allison.
Okay ladies I need your advise, I have had a cough for two weeks now and went to our walkin clinic this morning ended with bronchialitis( two medications and an inhaler). While there the nurse did my blood pressure but I must really be tired cuz I did not catch that she was doing it on my right arm(the side of my lumpectomy) I told her as soon as I realized it (went through one increase in pressure and caught it before the second increase in pressure) She told me to watch my arm and if I wanted to call my onc dr. on monday. The walk in doctor asked if I noticed any pain ( no I do not) What do I need to watch for and do you think this will be okay. The dr. said he would have the nursen mark my charts. Maybe a medical braclet would help. This is the first time in 3 yrs that I have not caught it before they took the pressure reading.
We are having cold temps again with a slight drizzle that is turning to ice on the roads and walks
Thanks for all your help!!
Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend and Have a good week
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I think you need to watch for swelling or pain. It might help if you kept your arm propped up on pillows while you're watching TV. The risk is related to the number of nodes taken. I did get a bracelet and made a bunch of cute bead bracelets for it. Then quit wearing it when I started to feel silly. They started to put the BP cuff on my affected arm when I went back for better margins. Fortunately I was awake enough to stop him. I'm pretty vigilant because my BP runs high and they almost squeeze my arm off. Good luck that it turns out no damage done.
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Termite, I would do just what Wren said for at least a couple of days. I have been fortunate, but getting LE for most of us can be a hit and miss sort of thing I think. For instance, almost all of us, if not all were told we should use a sleeve for flying. I got one just for the one time I would be flying. Afterwards, when I was back home I read ( somewhere on the boards here ) of a gal who flew routinely.....and nary an issue. Then shortly after the 100th. time, she got LE.
That is not to say its ok.....just saying that I think one "accident" should not constitute a problem. I did think a number of times ( fortunately I've always remembered ) that I'd like to have "something" to WARN others on the off chance that I might forget -- God forbid be unconscious or any number of things. Even with that.....there will be some who don't understand what the bracelet means or if they are color-coded, what the codes are.
Not saying anything to upset, but these are all situations that have gone on........with or without things that serve as a warning. Just some food for thought. I still sometimes wish I had something......just due to a situations not totally under my control -- and hoping the person dealing with me if that were the case, would know what the bracelet was for.
Blessings,
Jackie
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You can get a medical alert bracelet and have it inscribed with No BP, No Needle Sticks indicating the arm to avoid in case you are in a medical situation where you can't speak for yourself. Hopefully, it will be seen my the medical team working on you.
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Termite.... I think you're okay! I wondered about that also, but I asked the nurse, and she said since I had surgery in Dec. of 2009, I should be fine to have shots, or BP tests on that arm.... Just to be safe, ask again...! She also asked if I had node-involvement, which I didn't. And I don't have Lymphedema....
Also, you can buy one of your own, even at Walmart.... but when you go to the Doc's they always want to do it themselves.... Just ask someone on your team....
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"As I learned to accept myself, I began to relate to people on a deeper
level and saw that everyone comes with their own pains and struggles. I learned
to appreciate them for their flaws as much as their strengths, which in turn
helped me to accept myself more."-- Amyra Mah
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Hi Ladies,
I hope that everyone had a wonderful Christmas. We just got back Sunday night from Mississippi and I already want to go back where it's warmer! We had a great time with my family and I introduced my two grandsons ( ages 10 and 8) to Monopoly which of course they just loved! We had lots of fun! Now it's back to the laundry.
My yearly test results were waiting for me on the kitchen table when I arrived and the mammo was clear and everything else was o.k. so I guess I'm good to go until I go in July to see the oncologist. I can't believe that I work myself up into such a "stew" before these so-called routine tests.
termite, The same thing happened to Mom when she was in the nursing home of all places. I walked in as they were taking her blood pressure in the wrong arm and threw a fit. She was just fine afterwards but they did keep a better eye on her then. I think the health bracelets are a good idea.
I wanted to check in quickly but have to take the cat in to the vet for a pedicure this afternoon and need to get ready. More later......
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I can't tell you how many times I've had to stop people from taking my BP on my upper arms and it's only been 4 months since by BMX. I've had two additional surgeries since then and awakened with a BP cuff on my upper arm both times. Medical people (usually CNA's) seem horrified by the thought of having to take BP on my leg and don't seem to know how to do it. The assistants in the doctor's office are really bad. I've settled for BP's on my wrist. Seems ridiculous that I end up having to train them on even which cuff to use. I don't even think a medic alert bracelet will help since they ignore the wrist and go for the upper arm every time.
Back to memory lane: I remember in 6th grade (10-11 years old, 1959-60) there was a girl named Cheryl who wore a sweater buttoned up the back, pencil skirts and a pony tail. She looked like Connie Stevens. The boys loved her and the girls wanted to be her. She was ahead of her time. (20 years later I almost named my first daughter Cheryl.) The rest of us were just kids and wore whatever Mom made for us or hand me downs. Cheryl wore a bra (didn't need to) and some of the boys would come up behind the girls and run their finger across our backs to see if there was a bra strap. (Now a boy would be suspended for that - sexual harassment.) But it was an innocent time. Since I was younger than all the others, I wanted desperately to be considered older and cool like Cheryl. I borrowed my mother's garter belt one day and fashioned it like a bra, hoping a boy would check for a strap so I could move up one rung on the cool ladder. We were such babies. I remember that I knew a boy named Rex liked me because he kept punching me in the arm. Now 11 year olds are like we were at 16 but they dress like tramps. Don't their mothers SEE what they look like? My parents would have sent me to my room to change.
Later in junior high (7th, 8th, and 9th then, 1961-63) we wore culottes until the administration decided they were not skirts but rather pants - and banned them! (Girls were not permitted to wear pants in St. Petersburg, Florida in the 60's.) Our way to defy authority was to wear petti-pants under our skirts. They were slips...just made like very loose long shorts so in our minds, we were wearing pants under our skirts. In casual time at home we wore pedal pushers. Called Capri pants in other parts of the country. In high school (graduated in 1966 at 17) we were like little clones of each other. You didn't DARE wear anything everyone else was wearing. It meant you'd be instantly ostracized. We wore solid color pastel or white blouses with round collars and a little loop on the back. Solid color straight skirts - usually navy blue or tan and a madras belt with weejuns - oxblood brown loafers. (Only nerds put pennies in them) What about you?
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Sandra...you just cracked me up thinking of you with that garter belt around your chest! LOL I wore school uniforms for 12 years so I missed all those cool styles. I can't even remember what I wore on the weekends except for a red skort that I loved so much. Oh, and I had a Dr. Kildare shirt. I was the only one of all my friends to have that shirt and maybe because it was pretty dumb! LOL But I probably thought I was cool in it.
Ritajean...I know what you mean about worrying about "routine" tests. After all, it was a so-called routine test that turned our worlds upside down! I am seeing my breast surgeon this Friday. First time I will see her since my post-MX visit last July. I'm kind of thinking of bringing up doing a MX on my good breast. I really, REALLY regret not doing it at the same time. I guess I could not wrap my brain around removing a perfectly healthy breast, but now, of course, I totally get why that is done so often. If I knew then what I know now...
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Sandra.... let's see.... I was 16 in 1953 I think! Ha! DD # 2 was born in 1958....
I think "Cheryl" wore her sweater on backwards, just to be different.... I remember this really pretty gal in High School that "DYED" her hair.... I was so jealous, because she was so pretty...! And this other pretty gal was named "Lorraine"..... and we named our first baby, Sheri Lorraine... and she is just as beautiful!
I don't think I even wore a bra until I was in 9th grade... I was so tiny....! And I stuffed Kleenex in my first Bra. I didn't need one, but I just wanted to belong to the "cool" kid club.... Ha!
But I sneaked to smoke! That meant I was REALLY cool. Me and my Brother.... such little rascals! But never at school.... just at home, when we would ditch, or walk up to the bowling alley.... I remember we could buy cigarettes..."Spud" cigarettes for 10 cents a pack... And ONE time, we ditched school, and my DAD surprised us and came HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our friends hid in the closet, and the rest of us hid under their BED!!! OMG I was so scared! We heard him say ...."What the hell????" But he left...... And I NEVER ditched again!
I think he knew we were there.... you probably needed a gas-mask to walk through the house! But he didn't rat on us to Mom...
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Have not posted in awhile, It is not good, Carole will understand. Christmas was quiet, went to candle light service at the church. Was real nice. A couple of weeks ago our DD got drunk and was taking pain med, and started beating on Kimber. Her husband called our number at 10:30PM and we were in bed, DH got up and the recording had picked up a horrible fight gong on. He called the PD in Milton, FL to investigate and they arrested her. Today Childrens services took Kimber and her brother from the home, her brother is just there on christmas vactation. The case worker tells us there is nothing we can do, we have no rights since we live in Texas. I think she is a little you know what trying to climb the ladder on whatever childs back she can. DGS dad is headed to Fl tonight, driving all night. DH and I are to old to do that. DG paternal father will be included in the hearing tomorrow at 1:30 by phone. Our minister suggested if we have a good relationship with him that we meet him and listen in. We do have a good relationship. Case worker told us there is nothing we can do since we live in Tx. We will have to file all these papers and be investigated and it can take up to 6 months.
As I have posted before DD is mentally ill, they took her into custody and put her in a phys facility, but the last time they did that they let her out in a week, she is a pathalogical lier.
I asked the case worker about a child advocate, she she did not know, that would be up to the judge, BS, all children all allowed that in these circumstances.
We are beside ourselves, myDH takes things so hard and blames himself. Its all I can do to keep him above water.
Florida has alot of crazy laws and to many so called religious people. That is the last place in the world I would want to live. Texas is bad enough.
Time to get off of my soap box, hope you all good holidays.
Hugs.
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I wore a bra since 5th grade....no choice about having boobies....(I looked at my Oma and my Mom and I knew why I HAD BOOBS) moved to Seattle area in 6th grade (from Ft Worth Texas) and none of the girls in my class wore a bra....I felt very freaky.....things changed by the time the girls got to Jr High.
In high school did anyone else wear middys with a tie (it was a white shirt with a button on WOOL sailor collar/cuffs...and a navy pleated skirt...
we wore it on a certain day of the week, every week for school unity and another day of the week would wear my Pep Club uniform...so only had to worry about what I would wear 3 days a week
I graduated in '65 from high school.
Mgster and Chevy, and others, that knew I was having trouble with Medicare paying for my BMX.....well 12/21/12 was a year ago and they have yet to pay a penny for my BMX for the OR/overnight hospital stay of $41,400 or pay the surgeon for the MX on my non cancerous breast.....the hospital has turned it over to a group of high powered lawyer and doctors that WIN cases for the hospital....I sure hope they are successful.
Di
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Mommarch...I am so so sorry.....that is terrible
My sis is mentally ill too....tried to kill me....but I knew if I called the police, they would hold her for only 24hours ......I didn't dare....I know she has a gun too
Di
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Mommarch! I am so sorry that this happened with your daughter! I can't even imagine what you and your husband are going through since they are so far away. What an awful situation. Hugs to you! Plus you have the added burden of watching your poor husband suffer through this and blame himself, which I'm sure he has no reason to do so.
Di...does your sister live close to you? She sounds scary! I was wondering if you had solved that Medicare issue. Can't believe it has been a year...talk about them dragging it out. Glad you have the hospital and their lawyers on your side. Sounds like you have this one in the bag! Keeping fingers crossed on this!
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Yes ....sister lives about 20 minutes away....with my 95 year old MOM in my Mom's house....I talk to my mom but I rarely see her....I saw her for maybe 3 minutes on Christmas eve when I brought her gifts....this makes me very sad
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Mommarch, my heart goes out to you and your DH. Your family is in my prayers. ((((HUGS))))
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Mommarch I'm so very sorry for u and u'r DH, he's so sad too., My heart goes out to the kids, that all takes so long---Oh what a nitemare u'r living right now and to be so far away makes it worse. Being mentally ill is so horrible there is no way one can help themselves, their lost in their own mind. And it's so hard for treatment, what can a Dr. see in a test, so it's a guessing game for what meds will work.
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Mommarch - hugs & prayers !!
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Mommarch,
We know your hearts are broken...AGAIN. How much pain can you and your husband take? You've had so much this year. It's bad enough with your daughter, but when children are involved, it's a tragedy.
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Mommarch...
Hugs and Hope that the situation will improve soon. As a kid I was chased by my Mom with a loaded shotgun while she was crazy with alcohol. Back then all the cops did was confiscate the shotgun. I used to pray that someone would notice, would help me get back my childhood while at the same time I pretended to the world that everything was OK. I know family services are a mixed bag but at least someone noticed and responded. I hope your daughter gets some help and your gkids will be ok
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Hugs to you mommarch! Oh my gosh! I can only imagine what you and your family are going through right now. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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I had a problem with the doctor taking BP out of my arm where I had surgery too but only once. I pay attention more now. When they were taking it I was so distraught over the reading I didn't realize they took it in the affected arm. Come to find out anxiety will definitely drive the numbers through the roof. Knew that happened sometimes but my BP has always been low - rarely over 100. I remember the petticoat days and I too put the Kleenex in my bra. I remember when I got my first official one...13. I was small - still am fortunately. I am sorry you guys are going through such horrific situations with your families. My daughter lives in Chattanooga and is dealing with a psycho X. I know if my husband and son lived there we would have to have a get out of jail free card because they would separately or in tandem beat the blank out of him. He deserves it. Praying for you guys. Happy New Year? diane
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mommarch ... You are in my thoughts. (((hugs)))
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