NOLA in September?
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2tzus....I have Pam's direct phone number if you would like it. Send me a PM.
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ccbaby- Bon Voyage et laissez les bon temps roulez!
Melinda - Freaking out! Me too, tho quietly! Had my pre-op tests today. Almost started to cry during the EKG, eyes filled up - no reason other than the reality of all this.
Sara - LOL! I can imagine myself roaming the halls, calling out, "Wawo! Happy!" and the nurses thinking me nuts! Say, are we posting our screen names on our doors yet?
Margit - "Assume the position!" LOL! Maybe your husband would like that response (TMI, I know!).
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Sara, I am in room 203. I have to stay an extra night because the doctors were all in surgery really late. I don't mind staying longer. I didn't want to just go into your room but I think I saw you walking earlier when I was still in my room. My mom is here with me. I hope you are healing well.
Good luck to all you gals that have surgery coming up.
~Alicia
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Wait! There's a name in here for Dr. D! Something with a super-hero ring to it, and that also refers to his appearance... "Boyish good looks," ladies? Really? I think not. Well, in the sense that Brad Pitt has "boyish good looks"!
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OMG I could have written that whole paragraph. I was just IMing my sister who has been to NOLA to have it done and I wrote I know this is the right decision but sometimes I keep doubting myself.. I am trying to plan this surgery only 2 weeks to go and still havent made the flight Still am not 100%positive who is my care giver.And all this time I am trying to work and keep my mind on work. It feels like this is all I think about. I have got Katie working on the flight arrangements so I feel more at ease now but I was a wreck earlier today. Then I think is this worth it with the drains and pain and all.. because I am only ( only probably isn't the right word) BRCA positive so I still have my natural breasts and I am doing this preventatively.. So again sometimes I wonder if I have made the right decision. I seem to be gettting weepy just making the arrangements but I know that it is the stress of it all. Thanks for the sound off I feel better alreadyThis is pertaining to Melind413's comments
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When did Lanita leave? Why?
Bettye
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My Stage 2 is scheduled for April 21 - KC
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Sandy - Thanks for the seroma encouragement. Given that this bulge is small but getting bigger, I think we're solidly into seroma-world. Your input is a great reminder for me to keep on it. I just want this tummy to be flat! I'm close, but not quite there yet.
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Re: Wheelchair at the airport - this was suggested as a possibility. We talked about doing this, since I did not want to be harassed by the security people. In the end, we decided to walk through and take our chances. I had heard of a patient who had been given a hard time regarding her drains and bulbs, so we were prepared to deal with that directly, if it came up. I was walking well and felt strong, so I was up for it. As we went through, the security woman did a quick patting down on me and did discover my abdominal drain and bulb, which was placed mid-tummy. She patted it a second time, getting a puzzled look on her face. I just told her it was "a drain left in from surgery a couple days ago". Her eyes doubled in size, shocked, and nearly panicked saying, "OH!!!!! Did I hurt you?!!!" I assured her that I was fine and she waved me on. No problem. I guess it can go either way. If you choose to go the wheelchair route, you may need to build in a bit of extra time.
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I had an oncology appt today. She wanted to see my "surgical results". No surprise here that she was stunned. Her mouth dropped and she had to examine every inch, saying over and over, "wow, great job. Wow, great job." She was surprised that I was going to go back for Stage 2, and then she was reminded that these are plastic surgeons we're talking about - the perfectionists.
And I think we have the perfectionists of the perfectionists in this N.O team.0 -
Holtbolt Cindy,
A dear friend (and NOLA grad) was there at St Charles with 2 of her siblings (both had surgery). I was on the phone with her and asked her to give you and HelloCT a hug from me. I am GLAD it made you happy!
Lou Ann.Cindy and anyone else who has had post anesthesia meltdowns{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}} and boy am I glad that I am not the only one!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So utterly and perfectly normal but SCARY at the same time.
Gentle hugs all around,
Marcia
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Um YES, ditto....Very glad I'm not the only one who had meltdowns......gosh but mine happened more after stage 2....and I had several!
Happy I am 3 mos post lipo(generous) and I think most swelling is down BUT abd incision above and below still gets swollen some esp after lots of standing. BUT it took a long time and almost everyone says give it a couple mos.
Ginnie.....thanks for the pm's!
Can you please clarify tho for us all.....because I'm understanding you to say they took tissue(fat?) from the 'Lat area'.......they took fat -yes? NOT muscle- in the sense of an LD flap? I have heard of this option being done(muscle sparing) to help supplement a partial flap loss.....can't remember where I read about it but was VERY intrigued.Sara.....have been thinking of you and keeping the good vibes and thoughts as well as prayers headed to you! they are not going to stop until you're fixed...how great is that! I'm so hoping things continue to progress well!
beauty sleep time-have a great wkend!
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PlainJane - yes, they took tissue, but not muscle from the lat area. They also put in a triangular piece of skin where they removed the skin underneath that had the little spots that would not close. Why he took it from there, I don't know.....easier recovery,maybe? I am a heavier lady, so he had plenty of areas on my body he could have taken it from! lol
Still have two drains, and nurse still coming daily to change dressings, but things seem to be getting better. Lots of swelling in side of breast and axilla, and I think it may be lymphedema, but Dr.D does not want me to get any massage done so having to be patient <sigh> which is not one of my virtues.
Ginnie
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Gin - why would Dr D not want you to get lymphatic massage yet? I have started it, since my rt arm is wanting to swell (darn it). It's very light and gentle. Did he explain this to you?
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Serious grief is setting in now. Pre-op tests today started the cascade, I guess. I'll cry myself to sleep tonite. Figured it would hit sooner or later. Sooner... This all sucks. I hate this.
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Sara- So good to hear from you! Hope you get another walk outside- if you dont check out today.
I too (well after each Surgery) Get very depressed...I assume it is From Anesthesia, Drugs & the stress of Surgery itself. For me it usually starts 2 weeks after.
CCbaby- you are our only Girl up this week! Good Luck to you & have a Nice trip there.
Pam
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Minnesota,
You will have the most peace of mind after the surgery. Although I did have cancer in the breast they removed, it still left me with a peace that I have not known for three years. You will be so glad you did this. If there is no cancer, you have a new breast and you will never have cancer in the breast again!!! If they do find cancer, then the breast will be removed and the cancer gone!!!
Holtbolt,
I have laughed so hard about you saying they cut off your a*s to make your boob. I have wondered myself "What have you done?" I am now nearly 5 weeks out and could not be happier unless of course this last drain was gone. Maybe Monday!
Ccbaby,
Good luck. Will you be going down to NOLA on 55? If so when you pass thru Grenada, MS think of me. I am about 40 miles east of Grenada.
Bettye
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Minnesota, I hope you can spend the time to process your heart. I'm sorry you are having a cascade of grief. There are so many conflicting feelings associated with this. The last couple days before my procedure I was a mess - but I was very glad to have chosen such an amazing team. That helped me have a bit more confidence. But that does not eliminate the natural reactions we have to such a big step - before or after. Thinking of you, KC
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kcshreve - This last surgery was only on Feb. 10th and I still have two drains in my side/back area. I assume the drains are the main reason. Plus that I am still just a month out.
Minnesota - Yes, It is a big step.....but it is a productive step.....to get you closer to the beautiful lady that does not have to worry about breast cancer anymore!! Personally, I have never regretted my bi-lat. The left side that had no cancer (but did have some "changes" after removal that were noted) has been great thru recon. No problems with that side whatsoever.
Just know that we are all here for you! (((((HUGS))))
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OK ladies, no secret I have a counselor! Got her last year when I started having regular progressing to uncontrollable meltdowns 6 wks into Tamoxifen and a couple mos following rads. AND decided to keep her when I was pretty sure I'd be moving thru the pbm/recon scenario evn tho I was 'doing better'..Thank you effexor plus other stuff /tricks/actions that have helped me cope. BUT I want all of us to benefit from her words of wisdom which I will share below!:
This is all a process. And there is grieving involved. The more we try to stifle the emotions, deny that it is not grieving THE LONGER it takes to get thru it! We didn't ask to be part of this club. Tears/ambivalent feelings surrounding amputation of a body part to try to ward off a life threatening disease are normal. Yeah it's great we have alternate options but the reality is IT STILL SUCKS!(my words!). She told me she would be worried about me if I didn't have those feelings. When I went for consult in Nola and was walking had several moments of " What am I DOING!" and found myself welling up tears. Even at pre op visit had to stop and collect myself as Stacey was bringing me back. I certainly wasn't grieving the imminent loss of ducts and lobules.....or heck maybe I was! I just know no matter how thrilled we are and happy w/ heck I may as well say for me an improvement? This is still such a LOSS for us and that's why we do have to talk about it, have good care and people who will listen and understand that AND make the best possible alternative for what we have to GIVE UP to stay healthy or restore some mental and emotional inner peace.
Sorry certainly not promoting my whining! Just so happy to know the emotional roller coaster is a shared ride and we wouldn't be normal if we didn't shed some tears or get anxious.
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Well ladies, I finally have the all clear...Dr. D checked on me yesterday and so I thought it was a go--but he wrote "probable discharge." My one doppler has never sounded great and with all the trouble I've had in the past I needed to wait until Dr. T. rounded. I met Alicia and her mom so that was nice--she left today too. Thanks for all of your prayers--I am now at day 4--my first flap failed on day 8 so I'm still a little nervous...Keep the good vibes coming! I'm staying at the Avenue down the street my post-op is Monday and I fly out right after...Hugs,
Sara
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Thank you for sharing that, plainjane. Very true and honest. The tendency is to hold in the bad stuff and not discuss it here to not scare the ladies just starting their journey. (I know I have been guilty) But, you are right - We all have these fears and feelings, and it does help to know we are not the only one going thru them.....WOO HOO!!!!
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Gosh hope I don't sound like too much of a self appointed know it all! love you all and hate when one of us is down!
GIN! That is ultra cool about your muscle sparing lat area graft fix-up! Gosh they can be so inventive! Sorry about your edema. I'd read Dr. D does like to let things sit a while post op. That whole massage topic.....I think sometimes even the MLD people can differ in their technique and maybe be too aggressive.
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Minnesota, Sally, and Melinda - Hang in there!!! It IS a huge step and it IS emotional and you ARE allowed to cry and vent and feel any kind of emotion you are having. Give yourself the time to take it all in and pamper yourself a little bit to ease some of the anxiety. I do not think there is anyone here that did not doubt their decision at one time or another. Whether it was having the prophylactic mastectomy (What am I doing? What if that side never develops cancer and this is a waste of time? What if there is already cancer and we just don't know it? - all NORMAL questions and worries); then those with delayed reconstruction (Is it really bad just to live without breasts? Am I being selfish for doing this? Prosthetics aren't so bad, right? Okay, maybe going overboard with that last question!). Anyway, I think it is completely normal to analyze, question, re-analyze, debate, etc. all of these decisions that we make as breast cancer survivors. We want to feel whole but end up questioning our own judgement all the time. There is really no wrong or right. We just make the best decisions we can with the information available to us at the time. My hubby reminds me of this all the time - especially when I have regrets for trying the implant route first (I could have skipped 2 surgeries had I not done that first!). It was the decision I made given the information I had at the time. So, ladies, take the time to grieve the loss of your breast(s), don't be too hard on yourself, and take some time for you - whether it is a pedicure, a bath, shopping (wait, did I say that?
), a day out with girlfriends, or whatever gives you some relaxataion and a sense of peace. Hang in there and know that everyone here is behind you no matter what. Whew...!
On to other events - yes, they told me Lanita was no longer there this week as well. I was so sad!!! I love Lanita and all her help. They have me working with Candice on insurance stuff and she has been great, then someone else got back to me on some cost issues... and someone else that is appealing my insurance company from stage 1. SO, I think maybe there are different people working in different stages of the insurance stuff. That is just my take anyway. And yes, I asked why Lanita was no longer there... and knew as I was asking that noone would be able to tell me. HIPA is not just for the patient... And still, Lanita will be very missed by many (sniff).
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Jenn - I think we were writing at the same time!!!
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Hee hee! Nordy! I am full of it today! I still think of your swimming story and your old boobs floating away......and wasn't that when you KNEW you were going to go ahead and GO FOR IT....because you had been sort of in a panic......going thru the whole "Should I really be doing this?....I'm finally healthy again.....what am I DOING!" as we ALL do!/did/may do again? Nordy you do that to yourself w/ the implant thing and I think......sheesh....had I just skipped to DIEP I could've skipped rads and much more stuff.....BUT YES, like you........like ALL of us....we make the best decisions we can w/ the info we had at the time....and that's all we can do......Learning from others mistakes is a-ok too!
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Minn, hang in there. Closer to being released from the oncologist! It's worth it. Just not easy, but worth it. Hang on girl.
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Minn -- I join the others, I have never regretted my prophylactic mastectomy. I looked at my then 3 year old son, and told myself, raising him is all that matters. He is now 24 and I wish he would move out, but he was definitely my inspiration at the time.
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BettyE...yes, we will going by Grenada on 55 tomorrow. Last time we stayed in Grenada on our way back. Right now we are at Horn Lake MS (half-way for us) We are going to go to Target (my fav store) and dinner here tonight.0
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Soo on top of the stress my job is giving me my mother is stressing me out beyond belief. She is going with me for the first half of the surgery. While she loves me and is supportive in the sense that she is coming with me she is so not supportive of the surgery.
When i ask her if shes excited or ready for the trip she says why would i be excited? I've offered to show her all my research and to have her talk to people who have had the surgery but she just won't at all. She will be with me before the surgery and I've told her she needs to stop discouraging me. I dont know what else to do or say to her/ I wish my hubby could go with me before and not just after.
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