Class of 2009 - Sisters in the same time frame
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txstardust I hope you heal fast believe me I have learned over the last 5 months from sitting at home with no job.... It's simply no fun!
Everyone talks about how much fun it will be to retire, but I simply don't know what I will do with myself. I think I shall go mad (LOL) sitting at home day in and day out. I don't like housework and I am not a flower person, so yard work has never been my thing. We don't raise a garden for vegetables (although if groceries continue to go up we may have to start), etc.... The things my husband and I like to is travel and attend Nascar and unfortunately that costs money, so to do those things I will have to get a job and keep it and work till I can't walk ... haha!! I am like a lot of people I complain about work and being tired but I thrive off of it. I have figured out I am a workaholic. I am simply miserable without my nursing job and the people I get to see everyday and make sure they were being taken care of. Hey Juanelle, Pam, Michelle and Alicia! Been missing all of you around here, but everyone has such busy lives these days. I do wonder what became of Princess JoJo also?? We haven't heard from her in a long while. I hope her and her daughters are o.k. Maybe she to is just living life and enjoying moving on.
P.S. Pam I still haven't found that elusive job yet. Yes I am stressed because financially things are really not good. But I'm standing on faith that God will bring me through.
Have a great New Year!
Renee
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Hi everyone ! Hoping everyone enjoyed the holiday and is ready for a HEALTHY 2012.
Finally healing from my broken leg, doing physical therapy 3 x's a week and trying to get moving and drop some lbs. Other than that scan/and oncologist coming up beginning of February. I am already anxious. But feeling good otherwise. You are all always in my prayers.
WHERE is JOJO and her magic wand?
Michele, Rene, Shelby hoping all of you are doing well !!!
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Hello everyone! This is a Great Thread-I am just approaching my three year anniversary. Besides surgery, radiation and all three AI, I am feeling about 60 percent.
I am now taking Aromasine and have some very specific side effects in my shoulders, upper arms, especially my right arm and back muscles, fatigue and insomnia, I have to take a sleeping aid to get to sleep. Glad it doesn't make me groggy the next day.
Even though Aromasine side effects are uncomfortable and different from the other two AI, they are not as sever as Femara and not as nauseating as Arimidex.
I take Advil when my right arm begins to have a achy feeling. I also swim a mile every other day to help control the discomfort in my back and arms and become fit enough to compete in the 65 year old bracket. In addition to swimming, I lift weight which does make my arm muslce feel somewhat worse-but I need the weight to power up my pulling in the water.
Has anyone else experienced any of these side effect-and are any of you master swimmers? Would love hear from you swimmers to see how swimming helps with the side effects. Do you lift weights and if so does it affect your upper arm side effect? Also, how is your fatigue? Mine is always worse around 3 O'clock in the afternoon. I could lay down on the floor and go to sleep.
Look forward to all of you ladies experience and advice.
Annamaria
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Hi AMP47,
I'm just switching from Femara to Aromasine too and don't feel well. Have been on Femara for 21 months, till summer 2011, I have had all SE's, describing from BCO ladies posts. The first two months I felt nothing special, than I got terrible knee join pain, but my ONC. was satisfied and said "it's is working". I was taking ibuprofen then Vitamin D3, for a while it was better, later I also have so much bone and muscle pain, stiffness, depression too. Taking my pill before sleeping was helping a bit!
I was trying a lot to cope with: D3, calcium, massage, baths, exercising, swimming. After swimming I was tired, but next morning and all over the day no bone/joint pains. And during the last month the SE's grow up to be tolerable. But at 6-months check-up my Onco seeing thicker finger joints, proposed switching from Femara to Aromasin. I was asking myself what difference in SE's should be. Coping with Femara I was so innovatory to find out what did and could help. This turn brought to me the SE's as at starting Femara. And the first night I couldn't asleep at all. Now, I'm taking the pill at breakfast, it's OK.
Greetings and best wishes
Usha
(English isn't my native language)
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Pam, good to hear from you. I am still working long hours, but only work 4 days a week. I will get to enjoy my spring this year and maybe my DH will get to take a vacation just have to decide where to go. There are so many places.
Mimi, I know it just doesn't seem possible that it has been two years since radiation. I go for all my appointments in March, mammo, bone density, then Onc. I have been released by all my other doctors. Good luck on all your appointments.
Eph3_12, Michele, and Sugar, hope things are gong well with all of you.
I seem to stay really busy, we have been doing things to the house, trying to get ready for retirement. I have been working on my kitchen and have just about finished. This weekend my cousin and I installed a back splash in my kitchen. Boy was it lots of work, but it certainly does look good. It is something I have always wanted, but would not spend the money. Well, I have it now.
Have a good week everyone.
Juannelle
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Juennelle, when do you plan to retire...is it soon.
Hello everyone.
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Hi Usha
My onco said the same thing about side effects: if you have them the drug is working. Femara was very hard for me. I took it for 6 months and had to stop due to the pain in my back, shoulders and upper arms with the right being the worse. I quit taking it for two weeks and the symptoms went away, energy came back and fatigue was almost non exist ant.
Glad to hear after swimming helped your joint discomfort. I do not take D3 or calcium. I actually had an increase in my bone from my exercise program - thank goodness for that. No more bone density test for me. My onco was very surprised because my side effects were so sever he felt my bone much be deteriorating. Good for me.
I tried taking the pill early in the day-but it made my day very difficult. I did find if I took the pill on a full stomach, the effects were not as severe. So, I take it at night, after dinner, with a sleeping aid to help counteract the insomnia., and off to "la la" land I go.
Also, Aromasine side effects are not as severe as Femara and I have less nausea than I did with Arimidex.
Have a healthy week. Enjoy your swimming...Annamaria Gonzalez Picollo
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Usha I also have the joint and muscle pain but not as bad as on Femara. One thing I did notice is that I was depressed more with Aromasine. But, when I feel the depression coming on, I swim extra hard that day or do something that is very physical to derail the feeling.
One thing that really helps me with my depression is a warm cup of hot chocolate. I eat mostly organic products and enjoy a fat free organic hot choc-without whipped creme, of course.
Forgot to put that in my first post. Annamaria
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michele, I need to work another 3 years. I wanted to retire last year, but BC took care of that. I will see what I do as I get closer to retirement age. I could work part time and only work 2 days a week, but I am not sure if that is what I really want to do. I live so far from work and I always go to work in the dark, since I leave at 5:00 each morning. I will just have to wait and see how things are going at that time.
Juannelle
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Juanelle I wish that I could retire in 3 yrs sometimes but then I think what would I do with myself. I've sat at home taking care of my 3 yr old granddaughter while I've been out of work and on the weekends I've sat with an elderly lady to pick up some extra money just to help out a little. This is totally not what I am use to, I am a workaholic and I now realize that... LOL!!! I hate house work and yard work. I don't know what I will do when I finally retire. haha!! If I have the money to travel may retirement will be fun.
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Popping in to say Hi to all you wonderful ladies. I hope you are all doing well through this crazy winter we have all had. Much love to you all
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OK ladies, I have a story to tell and I need your opinions. Please try not to judge me as "heartless", but I have to protect myself.
I have an adopted daughter, abut six years ago she dropped out of our lives and we had had some problems before, but she just stopped corresponding. She was a very difficult child and it was never easy to have her in our lives. She tried for years to cause a divorce, because she admitted later, that "She wanted me all to herself". She was a chronic liar, and did everything she could to upset our lives with our other children, who are not adopted.
When she dropped out, I had no way of getting a hold of her, no phone, no address, no nothing. So we grieved and went on with our lives, wishing her the best, but not sure how she would do. But we had to move on, she was in her mid 20s, old enough to know better.
Well, after 6 years of no word, I get a phone call from her. She is now 32. She has stage 2 breast cancer. Has had a biopsy, and is now in the process of getting her team together. I do talk to her about an hour, telling her my story and some of the things she should do. One of the most important was to get on this site and get some support. I could not have made it without you ladies.
She didn't ask for anything from me, but I know it will just be a matter of time. She has a boyfriend, in a long term relationship, but you know how that goes. She is a stripper, so her job is going away. She has never made an attempt to get any training or better herself.
We all know how expensive treatment is, even with insurance, you have to pay lots of out of pocket expenses. The money is not the concern, it is my heart. I just don't know if I can have her in my life for any reason, she makes life so hard. She is so self centered, while I was on the phone with her, she never, not once asked about anyone else. Now I know she had upsetting news, but wouldn't you think that she would at least ask?
So much as gone on in our lives in the past 6 years and I really haven't seen her in 8 years. She has not made much of an effort, since she left home at 18, unless she needed something from us, then she was all sweet and stuff. From about the age of 10 when she found out she was adopted, she just wouldn't settle into our family and was just so cold and hard to us. When she got mad at me, she would say things like "I am going to live with someone that really loves me", now she was talking about the people who gave her away. We could just not love her enough, as far as she was concerned.
I appreciate you listening to me. I have some hard decisions to make, in regards to her and I am sure it will be an interesting journey.
Juannelle
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Juannelle, wow. I feel for your situation.
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Thanks Michele. I am so conflicted right now, but I know I will do the right thing, it will just be so upsetting. I feel her pain and my heart goes out to her for what she is facing. I wouldn't want to wish this thing on my worst enemy. I will figure out how to give her emotional support, but keep her at a distance. You never know what life journeys will come your way and how you will react to them, but it is a journey none the less.
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You never know, this could be a turning point for her. She might realize all that she has lost these years. Sometimes I think that we need to be reminded of what we have, and not dwell on the negative. My DH and my relationship improved when I was diagnosed.
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I know from my own experience that she will rethink her life and her choices. But will she be willing to make the changes needed to have meaningful relationships or will it still be all about her. Only time will tell, so we will play the waiting game.
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JUanelle, That is a rough story. I'm a adoptive mom of a 17 yr old who was 16 months old when she came to me. We've had a great relationship, but my marriage died, partly because of her, but in reality that was a good thing! As she has gotten older things have become more strained, but I hope we will always be close. That said, I feel for you. I hope that you can find a way to be somewhat of an emotional support with being sucked into her drama! Good luck & remember, you can ALWAYS come on here to vent!
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Juannelle, I can't imagine how you must feel. I wish I had some great advice for you. Best is to try to make sure your needs are met first and foremost - of course, it's important to be supportive of your daughter, but not at the expense of yourself. Just leave yourself open to the possibility for things to improve, but don't set your expectations too high. These situations can bring out the best in people - but they can also bring out the worst (as you well know)!
Big hugs to you ((((Juannelle))))
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Eph3_12, my daughter was 2 when we got her. She was very neglected and I would say now, that she had trouble bonding, because of her very early childhood. Her mother would put her to bed at night and leave and not come back until the next day, so there was no one there for her. But you take them and want to make their lives better, but that is not always the case. I do hope your situation turns out for the best. I tried for years to give her the support that she needed, but it was never enough. You could give, but never get anything in return.
Shelby, thanks for the hug. I will not set any expectations too high for her, because that never has worked in the past. I will wait and see what she really expects from me and we will work from there.
Juannelle
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(((((HUGS))))) Adopted mom here to but we have had her since birth and it is an open adoption. My girl's birthmom was also adopted along with her sister. Her sister was maybe four when she was adopted and she too never seemed to bond and she remembers the neglect. They are difficult cases yet you loved her all those years and did all you could for her. The only thing you can do is take baby steps. After about ten years, my daughter's birthmom found her sister. Nothing had changed and she too had become a drug addict like her real mom.
Personally I would still be mad. I would continue phone calls for a while and then maybe a visit. I am not a good person...lol I hold my anger. However after going through cancer I would most likely say come home let me take care of you...Since she can't work can she qualify for medical care.Wishing you the best outcome....keep us updated.
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Juanelle it's such a tough situation. I'm not an adoptive mom, however my sisters ex-husband adopted her son when he was a little over 1 1/2 yrs old. They never told him and he found out quite by accident from a family member. He became angry and the situation ensued to alcoholic drinking over the last few yrs. He has been in and out of rehab and is 25 yrs old now, has no drivers license for the next 4 yrs and has damaged his liver extensively. Long story short my sister has tried everything she has to help him and he is very remorseful when he is not drinking, but let him get one drink in him and he is a different angry individual. Use your own judgement here and I wish you all the best. Sending you big hugs sweet sister.
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Kittydog, adoption can be so hard. There are many ways to go about it, closed, open and so forth and you never know which way it will turn out. My granddaughter is adopted, she is 2 now and they brought her home from the hospital. I love her so much and hope as she develops and grows it will never be a problem.
Mimi, thanks for the support. I know so many people in some kind of the same situation that I am in with my daughter. It seems that if they do not bond when they are little, then it affects all of their life. There just isn't much you can do for some children and others come out just fine.
I am going to take baby steps. I am still not sure of how this will progress, but I am going to let her take the first steps to me. I have tried since we have had her to do what is best and it was never enough, however, she was the one that dropped out and now she has to make the amends for her actions. Actions have consequences and the consequence for this is that I do not trust her and she will have to understand that. We will have to have some long talks about what she has done and if it can ever be made better. If she hasn't changed or is not willing to see the wrongs in what she has done, then I am not sure that I can go further with her. Only time will tell as this saga plays out.
I don't know how I would make it without you wonderful ladies, you give so much support in so many ways. Love you guys.
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Good Luck Juanelle and I will keep your daughter and you in my prayers
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Thanks Mimi, that means so much to me.
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Hello Everyone!
It's good to see some activity on this group. I go to see my oncologist next week - coming up on 3 years since DX - and thought I would check in and see how everyone is doing.
Juanelle - I'm so sorry to hear about your dilema. Raising kids - adopted or otherwise - is the hardest job in the world isn't it? And it doesn't seem to ever end....
I'm going to spend a bit of time going back on this thread to check in on how everyone else is doing.
I'm doing well. I just had another breast reduction (Jan 5) on my natural side to make the two sides look more even and I'm so please with the results. I had myself measured at Victoria Secret over the weekend and I'm a B cup. I can't tell you how happy that makes me!
I also started Weight Watchers and have lost 8 lbs. It's hard but I did it by cutting out sugar and bread!
I hope you are all well!
Marie
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Marie, so good to see you. I did WW six years ago. I lost about 35 lb and kept it off. Be sure to go to the meetings they do really help.
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Hi Michelle and Marie it's good to see both of you here. I need to do something myself to lose about 15 more pounds. I may try wt. watchers once I get back to work.
Marie I'm glad your breast reduction went well. It's been a yr this past Dec. since I had mine done. I am a C cup since I had mine done. I have been very well satisfied. My PS still wants to do a nip tuck to make it perfection but we are waiting till this summer to complete it.
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Hi Michele and Mimi!
Mimi - My PS keeps asking me but I'm waiting on a nip tuck too. My radiated, expanded skin is just too thin and I don't want to risk it right now.
Does anyone have blood tests done prior to their ONC visists?
I had mine done on Monday and I just checked the results online. There are a couple of flags and one of my Tumor Marker tests has increased. It's still within the normal range but it's got me spooked.
My appt is not until Feb 29 and now I'm kicking myself for checking the results so early....
I'm starting to write down some questions because I feel like this one is going to be a bit more than a "poke prod and see you later" appointment.
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Marie there are a variety of things that can make your tumor markers fluctuate a little. If you have had a virus, cold, difference in meds lately... etc. The Oncs don't usually worry too much about it as long as it stays within the range and doesn't go over the high for whichever the test is they are using. Just thought I would let you know so you wouldn't worry to much.
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Thanks Mimi!
We did just have a terrible month of flu/cold/cough/sinusitis in my house. Both my husband and son had it bad and needed medical attention and drugs.
I only had a bit of a runny nose and scruffy voice/sore throat for a few days and thought I had escaped the worst of it.
I guess that could be the explanation for the sudden rise..
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